"Are You on the Hook for Mom's Nursing-Home Bill?"

[kumquat]

Quote:

Originally Posted by kcowan In the early 90s, MIL, mother of former wife, was committed to a home. Her son, a bank manager, had all her holdings transferred to he and his sister then applied to the government for social assistance. I am pleased to see governments close such loopholes. She lived for 8 years in the facility at half price.

While I agree with you, you and I are citizens and residents of a different country. Each has its own laws.

Many years ago, DW worked in "intake" for the local welfare department. She would come home with stories like you describe. Mom is either declared incompetent or simply naive and hands the bucks to the kids. The kids apply to put her in the home on welfare as she is destitute. Occaasionaly DW would get get a kid (doctor, layer or whatever) who had mon's estate in his hands bring her in. After a bit of investigation revealing the transfer they'd say "Mom didn't work all her life to leave us nothing". DW liked to say "Mom didn't work all her life to die on welfare".

[Chuckanut]

Quote:

Originally Posted by haha Old boyfriends? Ha

How about the ex spouses? And their children

[Texas Proud]

Had to look it up.... safe in Texas


States with filial responsibility laws are: Alaska, Arkansas, California, Connecticut, Delaware, Georgia, Idaho, Indiana, Iowa, Kentucky, Louisiana, Maryland, Massachusetts, Mississippi, Montana, Nevada, New Hampshire, New Jersey, North Carolina, North Dakota, Ohio, Oregon, Pennsylvania, Rhode Island, South Dakota, Tennessee, Utah, Vermont, Virginia, and West Virginia.




Edit to add: I would probably pay for my mom no matter what.... just to prevent someone from posting some snide comment......

[Texas Proud]

Quote:

Originally Posted by kumquat While I agree with you, you and I are citizens and residents of a different country. Each has its own laws. Many years ago, DW worked in "intake" for the local welfare department. She would come home with stories like you describe. Mom is either declared incompetent or simply naive and hands the bucks to the kids. The kids apply to put her in the home on welfare as she is destitute. Occaasionaly DW would get get a kid (doctor, layer or whatever) who had mon's estate in his hands bring her in. After a bit of investigation revealing the transfer they'd say "Mom didn't work all her life to leave us nothing". DW liked to say "Mom didn't work all her life to die on welfare".

I do not have a problem with the state going after someone that received assets from a parent so the parent can qualify for welfare... to me this is kind of like the BK court going after payments made prior to filing for BK...


I do have a problem with the state going after the children of a parent if that child does not want to pay... the child might have walked out of a disfunctional house and had not talked to or seen their parent for 20, 30 or even 40 years.... seems like an abuse of state power if they can make you pay just because you were given birth by them....


Also, under this thinking, why could the state not require you to pay for your brother or sister if they needed help and you have the funds

[rescueme]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Texas Proud I do have a problem with the state going after the children of a parent if that child does not want to pay... the child might have walked out of a disfunctional house and had not talked to or seen their parent for 20, 30 or even 40 years.... seems like an abuse of state power if they can make you pay just because you were given birth by them....

+1 (I represent that remark...)

[kz]

I am a very charitable person by nature but I'd have a hard time being asked to pay for MIL's nursing home care since she and FIL (when he was alive) spent all their money on themselves and, in her case, at the casino. A few years ago we were able to get access to her accounts (all done legally with the bank and an atty) in order to stop the madness so she would have money left for assisted/nursing home care. We did not receive any money for doing this only more work for us.