Being honest to my boss as I walk out the door. Financial ramifications?

[Al18]

I would focus on improving the company processes - you can't change people. Keep it brief and positive with your boss. At the exit interview with HR, I would list the top problems - and a solution if you have one. Keep it general - a sentence or two about each issue, and try to stay positive. List these issues on paper and hand them to HR. Don't bother to put your name or date on the paper. Once you've left the company, it's up to HR to act on these problems.

If you have a close coworker, call them up 3 months after you leave to see if any of your suggestions were implemented. Change comes slowly.

Enjoy your retirement - don't dwell on these problems. They're not your problems anymore!

[old woman]

I would keep it classy, tell them you are leaving for other opportunities or something else vague. Then if you want to have old coworkers remain friends you are welcome to come back to go to lunch with them and get the latest gossip. You can also tell them later why you left, years later or at least after you have a new job for a year you know will last.
Telling them how they lost you won't help you at all and isn't likely to help them, but you don't want to help them.

[Markola]

Quote:

Originally Posted by old woman I would keep it classy,

This is the approach I adopted - twice when canned - and it worked. It's no fun for most managers and HR professionals to let people go. When I got the news, I adopted the line "I understand, things change, if it's not a fit for you, it's not a fit for me, will you help me look to the future?"

I knew the decisions would not be reversed so I decided to make a bet that getting the next job would be easier if I left with class. I got much bigger severances, the chance to work from home the last months, recommendations from former colleagues and, crucially, even a great one from the final boss, and have even attended retirement parties since in both organizations. More importantly, I "fell forward" both times, ending up with better jobs, bigger titles, more pay and more responsibilities at new orgs. I make far more money now and have a happier circumstance than ever. It was fun going back to those retirement parties looking good, happy, confident and with a much better job than the people there, who were still hauling the same old BS buckets. Strength.

Did I feel treated poorly and unfairly? Yes. Was I angry? Yes. Was I hurt and embarrassed? Yes. Did I want to tell them all to shove it? Yes. Was it hard to swallow my pride? Yes.

Regardless, I decided that my objective was not trying to fix something that could not be fixed and that my self-worth was not about a particular job, of which I've had dozens of successful ones since high school. My objective was to play the human game well and improve my professional circumstance. My way of saying F You was to pretend they could not bother me in the least and that I viewed the termination as an opportunity to continue my talented career. Nothing but success. Everyone gets knocked off the horse occasionally but character is reflected in how we get right back on. Had I taken the opposite approach, nothing good would have come of it - for ME.

[haha]

Quote:

Originally Posted by daylatedollarshort +1. I learned the meaning of "small world" when I moved to the other side of the country, became the HR screener for my department at a megacorp, and resumes from people I'd worked with a decade before started coming across my desk. Some of my former coworkers ended up getting job offers and nice relocation packages to the Bay Area and some didn't get their resumes forwarded on to the hiring managers.

Reminds me of a cousin who had been incessantly and violently bullied by a couple of punks in our neighborhood. When he eventually became warden of the state prison, who do you think he was happy to see show up in his roster of inmates? And who was very unhappy to see him get this position?

What's that saying, "what goes around comes around?"

Ha

[VFK57]

Quote:

Originally Posted by ERD50 For me, 5 minutes after I was off the property, those kind of issues were the furthest thing from my mind. I had a new life to look forward to, and I got busy with that. I only think about the past issues introspectively. They don't bother me. Water under the bridge. -ERD50

Sure it is a better way of dealing with it. Yet every person has a different personality / character what is hard to change when you are at mature age.

[nash031]

Quote:

Originally Posted by RioIndy TL-DR: -I want to be brutally honest with my terrible, shameless boss as I walk out the door, for my own self respect. -I have the funds and I am fully prepared to leave this entire industry. -What could be the consequences other than burning bridges?

Take the high road. You'll feel better about yourself in the long run.

[gayl]

I could've written the OP.

Looking for advice: I'm trying to schedule a meeting with my boss so that I can let her know that I'm leaving after October 17th. I had fully planned on telling her that tomorrow. But I just got a late call off and I'm not going in tomorrow. Cancelled work days have become more and more common. Looking at workflow , the office should be done by October 15th and October 17th would just be any catch up. The office is traditionally laid off for November and December with a call back in January. So now I'm thinking to just let her lay me off and not say anything. Am I obligated to let her know that this is it for me? What would you do?

Just in case it makes any difference, I will be retiring with a government pension and only a year to go to Social Security. I'm flush enough in my investments that recently I'm making as much in dividends as I am in salary. So whether I work again or not doesn't really financially have an impact on my day-to-day life

[Lakewood90712]

Quote:

Originally Posted by gayl I could've written the OP. Looking for advice: I'm trying to schedule a meeting with my boss so that I can let her know that I'm leaving after October 17th. I had fully planned on telling her that tomorrow. But I just got a late call off and I'm not going in tomorrow. Cancelled work days have become more and more common. Looking at workflow , the office should be done by October 15th and October 17th would just be any catch up. The office is traditionally laid off for November and December with a call back in January. So now I'm thinking to just let her lay me off and not say anything. Am I obligated to let her know that this is it for me? What would you do?

Take the lay-off. Decide over Nov. and Dec. If you are sure you are done for good, let them know shortly before the new year. You get the best of both this way.

[rayvt]

Take the layoff. Nothing like retiring with a pension AND getting a severance package AND getting unemployment compensation.

And ... your whole outlook changes when you've decided to leave. All of a sudden issues that used to eat at you become nothingburgers. It all rolls off your back, because now you are (mentally) on the outside looking in. All that stuff is happening to other people, not you.

[38Chevy454]

Quote:

Originally Posted by rayvt Take the layoff. Nothing like retiring with a pension AND getting a severance package AND getting unemployment compensation. And ... your whole outlook changes when you've decided to leave. All of a sudden issues that used to eat at you become nothingburgers. It all rolls off your back, because now you are (mentally) on the outside looking in. All that stuff is happening to other people, not you.

X2, fully agree with this plan. It provides you Gayl with the flexibility if you decide to change your mind, but also gives you maximum potential benefit.

[RunningBum]

Quote:

Originally Posted by gayl I could've written the OP. Looking for advice: I'm trying to schedule a meeting with my boss so that I can let her know that I'm leaving after October 17th. I had fully planned on telling her that tomorrow. But I just got a late call off and I'm not going in tomorrow. Cancelled work days have become more and more common. Looking at workflow , the office should be done by October 15th and October 17th would just be any catch up. The office is traditionally laid off for November and December with a call back in January. So now I'm thinking to just let her lay me off and not say anything. Am I obligated to let her know that this is it for me? What would you do? Just in case it makes any difference, I will be retiring with a government pension and only a year to go to Social Security. I'm flush enough in my investments that recently I'm making as much in dividends as I am in salary. So whether I work again or not doesn't really financially have an impact on my day-to-day life

I agree with Lakewood. What if your situation changes or you change your mind for some reason and want to come back? This seems like an ideal time to have a couple months off to make sure. You can't be the first person who doesn't return after 2 months off.

[pb4uski]

Quote:

Originally Posted by rayvt Take the layoff. Nothing like retiring with a pension AND getting a severance package AND getting unemployment compensation. And ... your whole outlook changes when you've decided to leave. All of a sudden issues that used to eat at you become nothingburgers. It all rolls off your back, because now you are (mentally) on the outside looking in. All that stuff is happening to other people, not you.

+5 when they call you back you can always say that you have decided to not to return to work... in the meantime you'll have flexibility and unemployment compensation.

[gayl]

Oh I'm taking the layoff! I just didn't know when to tell her bye-bye! Turns out that's what my predecessor did only he jumped to another firm. Took the layoff time to find another firm. She was pissed. At any rate ..... work is beginning to interfere with my life

[Huston55]

Quote:

Originally Posted by gayl Oh I'm taking the layoff! I just didn't know when to tell her bye-bye! Turns out that's what my predecessor did only he jumped to another firm. Took the layoff time to find another firm. She was pissed. At any rate ..... work is beginning to interfere with my life

Do you mind sharing what kind of govt work lays off everyone for two months each year; and you still get a pension?

[Brat]

After I retired from a Fed agency I wrote a letter to my Senator sharing a situation which I asked be investigated. It turned out that the Senator was having dinner with the Secretary of that Department the evening he read the letter so he brought it along. A few weeks later I learned that the manager who was the source of the problem was given the choice between discharge or retirement at a meeting at the end of the day. He had been expecting a superior performance reward when the national office representative arrived in his office.

I gained nothing but satisfaction for my efforts. Bless that Secretary!

[Just_Steve]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Huston55 Do you mind sharing what kind of govt work lays off everyone for two months each year; and you still get a pension?

My wife works for our local school district 10 month employee and only part time and will be getting a pension.

[gayl]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Huston55 Do you mind sharing what kind of govt work lays off everyone for two months each year; and you still get a pension?

don't I wish!

I retired from the gov't 2/19/2004 and went to self employment. I had a semi-profitable tax business (only netted 20K+ a year, sort of hobby job) for several years until I landed a sweet job Feb 2014 while they negotiate a sale (9 months, severance). Then I went to current job. Been here almost 2 yrs (2 yrs in November)

So the breakdown is:

• gov't pension effective 4/1/2004
• converted 457 to IRA
• annual deposits from my company
• Roth from 2014-now
• UI eligible as it isn't on same source as pension

[convergent]

Here is how I approached a similar situation in the past.

1. I continued to do my job as best as I could.
2. I aggressively looked for a new job that I would enjoy and be able to contribute.
3. Only after I had accepted another job did I resign.
4. When I resigned, I did it professionally and strived to leave them in the best shape I could.
5. This didn't happen, but if I was sincerely asked why I was leaving, I would have tried to professionally share the things I thought could make a difference. I wasn't asked, so I didn't provide the feedback.

Burning bridges is never a good thing. I've been literally stabbed in the back before by bosses that lied to my face. I did not burn the bridges... I just became educated about the level of trust I could extend to them and I made sure I didn't get myself into a situation where they could hurt me.... and in some cases I warned my peers that I had a high level of trust with. If you burn a bridge, you never know when it will come back to bite you.

As an example, I had an employee quit on me at a very bad time. I was quite furious with how he did it, and his lack of doing a reasonable turn over before going out the door. I didn't blow my stack and say things I'd regret, but he knew I was furious. Six months later I called him up and got together with him for lunch. I told him how I felt when he left, and I also told him that I understood why he left, and finally I told him that I didn't want our relationship to end on that note and that I wanted to put it behind us and move on. I wished him well in his new job... something I couldn't do when he left. Fast forward a number of years and he had changed jobs a few times and was a Vice President at a tech company. I was changing jobs and needed a good reference, and he came through for me.

You never know when and where your network of contacts will show up or be called upon.

[gayl]

But what if you're not interested in working again? Quit or lay off? When do you say? I can cover the gap to SSA with dividend payouts

[convergent]

Quote:

Originally Posted by gayl But what if you're not interested in working again? Quit or lay off? When do you say? I can cover the gap to SSA with dividend payouts

There are many ways in life (besides work) that your network of connections can help you. I don't see myself sitting by the pool and reading books in retirement. I expect I'll be active in something... say its volunteer work and you either bump into someone you worked with before, or need to reach out to find volunteers. If you wrong someone, then likely they are going to tell others in their circle of connections and it might hurt you in the future.

Other than the momentary thrill of telling someone off, no good comes from burning a bridge. But certainly its a personal choice. Its just not how I roll.