BUYING is such an addictive behavior and is there a cure for it??

[FinanceDude]

Originally Posted by wab

The cure is watching the stuff fill up your house while it depreciates to $0. It doesn't take long to get tired of that.

Good one!! I just had to clean up my monitor on that? Do you do seminars??

[flipstress]

2ndCor,
Love is a need ...I mean loving and being loved--at the very least friendship and affection--are social needs (at least for most "normal" people). They could explain why we buy things that we think will make us more acceptable or attractive to other people. Then, there's the need for fulfillment, meaning, etc...

To the OP,
Lots of good constructive suggestions here already, but if punishment works for you, try cleaning and dusting and organizing your own house on a regular basis, like everyday or every week. I have lots of clothes and shoes and books, and when I keep up on the housekeeping and launder, iron, put away, dust, shine, vacuum the bookshelves and under them, I see how much I have and it cures me for a little while of my buying addictions.

Maybe the above won't work so much for techno gadgets, so you could try watching all your TV's, listening to all your stereos, radios, I-pods, and using your cellphone, PCs, and gadgets without break for like a couple of days. It might cure you for a while...but then again, that might be your definition of heaven...

[Fireup2025]

Well, I just bought a copy of YMOYL(since so many on the board swear by this book)...on half.com for about $8 including shipping. Beats the full price listed on The Simple Living network! See, you can buy the stuff you "want" and get it for LESS

[BigMoneyJim]

Avoid magazines and ads of any sort. It really does reduce your desire for the new gadgets when you're not reading reviews of them and how nifty they are.

Even hobby mags like photo magazines or R/C or computer news will sneak in all sorts of reasons to buy new stuff.

I don't recall why I quit reading such stuff, but I found my desire to buy things dropped drastically when I did. I guess Madison Avenue really knows what it's doing.

[MasterBlaster]

Taking a step back...

really, all of us would enjoy spending gobs of money it's just human nature. Our wants are unlimited but our resources are finite.

That's where some common sense/maturity comes in. We buy what we need (plus a little) and skip the fluff. To do otherwise such that you put your long-term livelihood at stake is unwise.

[SecondCor521]

Originally Posted by flipstress

2ndCor,
Love is a need ...I mean loving and being loved--at the very least friendship and affection--are social needs (at least for most "normal" people).

Flipstress, yes, I thought of love as well and I think it qualifies as a need. Fortunately I have my three kids and my parents and my sisters who love me and I can love and it doesn't really cost much of anything at all.

2Cor521

[dex]

"You do not own things; things own you."

[saluki9]

Originally Posted by HaHa

Anyone who can walk into a Costco and see those fantastic TV screens without at least wanting one must be a different species from me.

It doesn't matter if it's the third time I've been to costco this week, I MUST stop at the tv wall. Every time I'm there I just keep telling myself MUST HAVE 60 INCH PLASMA, thankfully my wife is there usually to keep me moving on to the 10 pound salmon fillets, 5 pound hunks of cheddar and the other thing SHE thinks we "need"

[Mysto]

Just saw an article on one of the finance web sites (can't remember but at my age I'm suffering with CRS).

The guy says happiness comes from experiences. When we buy something we only get happiness from the experience of buying and then having but the having experience wears off very quickly. Their suggestion - go for longer lasting experiences as opposed to "buying stuff"

My DW and myself plan to take this to heart as we ER (late as it may be) at the end of this year. More cheap travel - more visiting - more socializing- more charity work- and less stuff.

[Sarah in SC]

Adding to Big Money Jim, don't watch a bunch of TV or listen to the regular radio. I am amazed at how many commercials are on both on the few occasions I happen to watch/listen. If you don't see an ad for it, you don't know it exists, and therefore cannot pine for it. And I let my Costco membership lapse for the same reason--if I don't see it, I don't want it!

Sarah

[Trek]

I was going to put an extra cabinet on the wall in the bathroom to make a little more storage space in there. When I told my girl of my plan she said to me (as though I was crazy) "But if we have more space we will just buy more things to fill it."

The cabinet never went up and I became a bit wiser that day.

[txdakini]

I also used to have the shopping "problem". One year when I was working, I spent more than $8000 on clothing alone. Wow, I sure wish I had that money now as I sure don't have any of those clothes left.

I perceived shopping as a problem for many of the reasons already listed here: too much stuff to insure, take care of, maintain, clean, organize, store, give away, move, etc.,
too much time and energy spent shopping, preparing to shop, cleaning up from shopping, reading ads and catalogs, talking about shopping, etc.
too much money spent on these things
buyer's remorse, sometimes after a few minutes, sometimes after a few months
things that wore out too soon
things that became obsolete too soon
things that really didn't satisfy

I finally figured out, that for me, i was shopping so that I could be happier, somehow thinking that the things I bought would make me feel better or make me a better person. They didn't or at least not for long, thus I had to shop again. For some people food does this, or alcohol, or work or drugs and so on.

to change this habit in myself, I:

used the YMOYL program
made friends with others who were trying to live a less consumption-oriented life
stopped reading ads and catalogs and stopped watching commercials
stopped window shopping or shopping as a social event, usually because I was bored,
(the above two alone made the most difference...if I dont' see it I certainly don't think I need or want it!)
paid attention to what was already in my house
if I decide I want something, I usually wait for weeks or months before buying and then usually don't buy at all
when I think I want something, I look around and see if I don't already have it or something close to it. Often I do.

I do not feel deprived. I get everything I want, but it is only what I want, not out of habit or boredom.

So I used many of the suggestions already given to overcome this and today I do not shop and do not miss it. I only buy what I truly need with a few wants mixed in. The biggest gift of this effort has been more time. Secondarily I have more money to use on things that really mean something to me.

Before those of you who love to shop chime in, notice I said this works for me! It's not for everyone and not every one sees shopping and collecting material goods as a problem. It was a problem for me because I didn't like the results. If it's not a problem for you, I say hooray! Live and let live.

[Anansi]

Paying cash whenever possible usually helps. Seeing the actual cash leave your hand makes it much easier to understand what you are actully doing. On line with a credit card makes it seem like everything is free.

[HFWR]

I like having a few toys, but, frankly, I don't need at that $hit...

[audreyh1]

I wasn't too bad about the impulse buying - or at least I never applied it to really big $$$ items. And as I got older, it seemed to diminish. This seemed to be more of a disease of my 20s and early 30s.

HOWEVER

What cured me thoroughly of any impulse buying was the year I spent getting rid of most of what I owned so that we could move into an RV and live our life on the road. Boy, WHAT A WAKEUP CALL!! It really pointed out loud and clear what a total waste most of the stuff we acquire is, and there were several items I let go of where I felt terrible remorse over the wasted money and time and space. I don't think I'll ever forget that poignant lesson.

Now, having a small space and being able to roll at a moments notice keeps us from collecting much, and forces us to get rid of something old whenever we bring in something new. Funny - we notice how if folks stay parked for a while they start collecting all sorts of stuff around their site LOL! And some of them decide to buy a trailer to start carrying all the extra stuff along with them - how depressing.

I am so grateful that we went through getting rid of most of my stuff at the age of 45. We have such a small footprint now. If something happened to both of us soon (hope not!) our relatives wouldn't have to dispose of much. Many people I know dread the day they have to deal with all the stuff their parents have accumulated over a lifetime. Who knows why the human instinct to packrat is so strong.

When you start getting rid of a lot of stuff, you realize how much stuff owns you - in terms of time and space and just general life energy dealing with it. I never felt so free that day as when we had sold our house and our sailboat and headed our motorhome down the road!

Audrey

[Finance Dave]

Don't know if I'd call it a cure, but here are some ideas:

1) Vision your retirement....and create some visual aids. For example, if it means golfing 3x a week, get a few pretty pictures from golf magazines...and hang them somewhere that you'll be reminded every time you buy something that you are delaying that golf outing.

2) Have your savings taken out of your check automatically...that way you're guaranteed to get the savings amount up front.

3) If you want something, create an account or piggy bank and save for the entire amount BEFORE you buy it...so that you have no interest costs. I feel a lot better when I buy something knowing I already have the money at home to buy it....and that money was saved AFTER my retirement savings were taken out.

4) Walk through your house and just look at things...especially things in closets. What items have you bought that you don't use much? That old fishing rod you used 3 times in 10 years? That lamp that you never turn on? Remember that to buy a $50 item you must earn about $60+ because of taxes.

Good luck!

Dave

[Cut-Throat]

Budget yourself an amount to save and do this first.

Whatever is left over spend it and enjoy!

[haha]

There are a bunch of excellent suggestions in this thread. I hope when it winds down it might find its way into "Best Of".

Ha

[FIRE'd@51]

Of course, everyone doesn't have to RE. There's nothing wrong with continuing to work, make the big bucks, and buy whatever you want. Different strokes for different folks.