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Old 03-27-2010, 12:29 PM   #41
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Aside from my family, there is only one other person in the world to whom I would give money unconditionally.
Thanks. You know I'd do the same for you.
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Old 03-27-2010, 01:33 PM   #42
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Very nice legs, much better than my hairy knees - thanks
Why would anyone wear painful shoes?
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Old 03-27-2010, 02:19 PM   #43
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Why would anyone wear painful shoes?
Only for VERY short periods of standing time.

Sorry, the low hanging fruit tempted me again...
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Old 03-27-2010, 02:30 PM   #44
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There are several people i would loan money to if asked, and have done so. Have also loaned to relatives, which is stickier. A bit sad when one feels more faith in repayment from other than blood.
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Old 03-27-2010, 03:27 PM   #45
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It occurred to me that the reason no relatives have asked me for a loan is the fact that I have the most poorly paid job of any of them. My family is pretty small, and I can't think of one of 'em who is not fairly well off. My work friends are of more modest means, but the people with whom I am friendliest are stable sorts who manage well on their incomes. None of them are in McMansions or driving fancy cars or overextending themselves with credit cards. A good friend is a single mother, and she took a part time job to augment her income. Never a complaint from her or poor mouthing in any way. On the contrary, she is touchy about someone else picking up a tab. I have frequently invited her as my guest when I have a pair of tickets to some event, and we often skip dinner out as she wants to treat me afterwards so I just say, "Oh, let's just go home and not stay out late". I have told her repeatedly that I buy the extra ticket as a donation to the arts(true) and it is fun to have a companion(true), not to mention safer in parking lots and garages.
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Old 03-27-2010, 06:28 PM   #46
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Why would anyone wear painful shoes?
Possibly to pose for a sexy photograph? - May be she doesn't actually walk about in them
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Old 03-27-2010, 07:27 PM   #47
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Sorry, the low hanging fruit tempted me again...
As time goes by, the fruit hangs lower....



Oh and I made a loan to a friend many years ago. She paid me back.
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Old 03-27-2010, 07:30 PM   #48
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I was just cruising Morningstar for articles about muni bonds, and lo and behold, out jumped a link to an interesting article about family loaning.

A Novel Idea for Current Income?
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Old 03-28-2010, 11:39 AM   #49
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I was just cruising Morningstar for articles about muni bonds, and lo and behold, out jumped a link to an interesting article about family loaning.
A Novel Idea for Current Income?
Yikes. We'd once considered doing this for spouse's parents, and in retrospect I'm glad we didn't.
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Old 03-28-2010, 12:25 PM   #50
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Originally Posted by freebird5825 View Post
I was just cruising Morningstar for articles about muni bonds, and lo and behold, out jumped a link to an interesting article about family loaning.

A Novel Idea for Current Income?

Just read the article and it describes some of what we have been doing - especially the so-called usurious rate lending (though our rates have been below tv advertised DiTech's when i'm able to read their fine print on screen). We keep it pretty quiet - you really don't want to turn down a family member for a loan, almost as much as you don't want to foreclose on them or eat a bad debt. That said, we have made loans at a lower rate to people who conduct their lives in a manner we approve of. We've also forestalled foreclosure, for a 10-12% interest rate, for a number of people who have good security. Also made one unsecured loan to a bunch of suits that is just about to be turned over to a lawyer. Figure it will cost us a bit and we will claim it as a bad debt and write off whatever we are allowed on our taxes. We don't loan on everything - currently we have been offered a 21 unit trailer park on 15 acres (totally overgrown and barely peeking out of the forest), a 21,000 foot warehouse being converted into a skatepark, a second on a Phoenix house, rental houses.... Entertaining teasing out the reality behind some of the offerings - and deciding if you would want to own the property if it all went bad.

Oh - and all that said, we did make enough on loans last year to cover the cost of the bad loan and to spare. Looking to make more loans as we only have three out now, not counting a contract we are carrying on a home sale years ago.
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Old 03-28-2010, 01:06 PM   #51
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I've found that loaning money to just about anyone is like feeding a ferrel animal. They always come back for more - even the ones who repay. Got a friend who ostensibly will w*rk off a recent loan, but I don't know how since he needs to w*rk just to survive right now. I do feel sorry for the predicament he has gotten himself into. He's a nice guy in many ways and he does w*rk hard and does excellent w*rk. But, he can't seem to swallow his pride and take advice. I (and other friends) have advised him of ways to save money, but he seems to think he "deserves" his little luxuries (tea at Starbucks - give me a break!), nice car, nice apartment, lunch out most days, etc. etc. I see some resentment against those who have more than he does. One friend who gave him advice happened to send his son to a nice law school. For some reason, my friend picked up on that and doesn't think he needs to take advice from anyone who can send his son to law school. Say what??

Guess I'm a soft touch - especially for someone who w*rks hard and is really trying. Still, I don't see this ending well - at least not anytime soon. The last time he asked, I sent him to an agency (his church) for assistance. Don't know if he went because they require him to listen to financial advice - which I know he does not what to hear.
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Old 03-28-2010, 01:24 PM   #52
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A recent exchange with a loan broker - my answer borrowed a phrase from a list member BTW. Since then the broker has offered us three other loan requests:

Bob,

Understandable - we don't like our note either. It is designed to rain down fire and molten lava if the borrower screws up. On the other hand, if the borrower does comply with the terms of the note nothing bad happens. With our money at risk, I want to make the borrower very aware that it will get expensive if the terms of the note are not complied with - payments must be made on time and as agreed. Our terms are the way they are because we have had people not pay in full when the balloon came due - we were stuck with an agreement that had no penalty and low (for the time) interest. We had another borrower who didn't make any monthly payments and we had to start foreclosure - the lawyer expected payment every month to prosecute the matter and it was a real headache and well worth the default interest. We are making loans to people with spotty credit history on places that wouldn't pass any bank's inspection process in a time of tight credit. We are going to cover our assets. And, by the way, this note was last used by us for a $xxx loan right at the end of December last year for a borrower in Portland on a duplex and single family home.

T.


> From: fxxx
> To: calmlokixxx
> Subject: Emailing: Note - Balloon Payment -OR.pdf
> Date: Mon, 22 Mar 2010 11:32:12 -0700
>
>
> Dear T. and S., The borrower does not like your note. So, I had the
> title company create their usual note that we have used in several hundred
> transactions more or less through the years. It is enclosed. The
> borrower will move forward with this note and terms. Please let me know if
> this would work for you.
>
> I seriously doubt that I could ever get any borrower to accept your note. I
> tried to get him to negotiate the note paragraph by paragraph and see if we
> could obtain agreement but he declined. I am very disappointed in how this
> is going because I was hopeful that we would be able to do some business.
> This is the most difficult note I have ever seen. Have you ever been able
> to have any borrower accept it and go ahead with a loan using this note?
> Best regards, Bob F.
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Old 03-28-2010, 02:26 PM   #53
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Quote:
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Why would anyone wear painful shoes?
Those aren't shoes, those are spurs.

Ha
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Old 03-28-2010, 04:32 PM   #54
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I recently loaned a close life-long friend $3500 to pay off his tuition so that he could register to finish his thesis.

We were both pretty leary about doing it, but he was up against a deadline and had collectibles that we both value that could have covered the debt if it came down to that. The only other person he could have asked is a wealthy father that would have turned any money he loaned into a mental weapon down the road.

He paid me back in about two months.

Now I'm just hoping he completes his thesis and gets his shingle.
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Old 03-29-2010, 03:06 PM   #55
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I lent money to one of my best friends when she was going through a bad breakup and had to pay her 1/2 of a mortgage and rent on an apartment for a few months. She paid me back a few months later, no problem.

I have lent my SO money twice - once to clean up some old debts, and recently to buy his motorcycle. His credit is much better than when I met him 5 years ago, but I still gave him a better interest rate than he could get on his own, and better for me than what I could get from CDs etc. He pays me back automatically from his paycheck every two weeks. The title to the motorcycle is in my name, just in case, but I have no doubts I'll get repaid in full!

My parents have lent my sister and I money in the past (not in a long time, because we don't need help anymore), and never had any qualms. They helped us each with our first car loans, and helped my sister and brother-in-law with cash flow when they were moving and bought a house before selling their old one.

None of my relatives will likely ever need money from me, but we have a small family, and if anyone ever asked, I would not hesitate.
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Old 03-29-2010, 04:02 PM   #56
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I posted a new poll:

Do you charge less interest on personal loans?
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Old 03-29-2010, 06:07 PM   #57
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From the time I was 19 until I was 25, I sent money home to my mother every month (I stopped when she remarried). I have also given my brother and sister money on an irregular basis when needed (but they haven't needed it in over 20 years now; I'm proud of them.)

Lest anyone think I am just a soft touch, I did recently and memorably turn down one of the in-law's request for a substantial loan (which I knew would never be repaid).

Aside from my family, there is only one other person in the world to whom I would give money unconditionally.

Wow..what a great son you are!!! I'm impressed totally! What a loving thing to do for your mother...impressive, my man, very impressive!
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Old 04-26-2010, 10:19 PM   #58
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I have never loaned money to family. I just don't believe in it. I've seen too many cases of money creating problems in families, including my own. I was not the lender.

I did loan money to a friend once to help her with divorce legal costs. I loaned $500, she repaid $100, I never saw the rest of it. Lesson learned.

My policy now is never loan money. Call me Scrooge, but to me, the quickest way to create problems in personal relationships is to be asked to act like a creditor. On the flip side, if I hear of someone with money problems, I have bought small size gift cards for gas and groceries here and there to help out in times of sickness or hardship.

My response to any wanna-be borrowers is always along these lines...
"I'm on a fixed income. Maybe you could check with the local credit union for a personal line of credit. They have really low interest rates."
+1
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Old 04-27-2010, 12:18 AM   #59
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I had a coworker who needed 800 dollars for security deposit because he was forced out of his current place through no fault of his own. He was never good with money, and he'd borrowed from me in the past, but always paid me back. He eventually left the company for a job in the same industry, then I took a contract job 14 hours away, so I knew that not seeing him every day would affect him not caring about repaying me, as we slowly drifted apart. Anyway, he sent me a check for half of it. Then nothing, for months and months. I called him, and he wouldnt return my calls, so I figured that it was a lesson learned. Then I got an idea...I called him up one day and left him a message about potentially losing my job, and I was hoping he could put in a good word for me with his new employer, if I should need it. He called back, and was excited and willing. (It was almost like he was glad, not that I may be losing my job, but that I was coming to him for help.) Never needed him...yet, but we call each other every few months to see how things are going, and pretend like the debt doesnt exist. The way I see it, thats the price I pay for a Plan B. 400 bucks.
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Old 04-27-2010, 06:17 AM   #60
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I lent money to my sister to bail her husband out of jail for a DUI (his brother wouldn't bail him out). She never paid me back. I'll never lend money to anyone again.
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