Join Early Retirement Today
Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 05-13-2013, 09:18 AM   #41
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Jun 2002
Posts: 367
Excellent post. I've done this process after my mother passed away (my father went 6 years earlier) and I could not have described the feelings any better. My father (and myself) are the same that we are unable to throw out tools. This is making me re-think some things....


Quote:
Originally Posted by JoeWras View Post
My dear Dad, nearly 90, moved to senior living over the winter. My siblings and I are in the process of cleaning out the house and putting it up for sale.

What a sad, happy, crazy, process!

We've found goofy little toys, I mean tiny little things, that are bringing floods of memories back. But we've also found so many things that just bring sadness. We have at least 10 vases that Mom (who passed 8 years ago) stored away. I realized these were from flowers I sent her. Now just stuff collecting dust.

I seriously don't feel like buying another item of anything for another year.

There are many unopened items that were given as gifts. What a waste.

I just tell my friends to send their presence, love and TIME. No "stuff." And for me, that's all I want from friends and family. I don't want stuff that I have to make pained decisions about.

Dad never could get rid of a tool. I'm now making decisions about tools from the 20's and 30's that were my Granddad's stuff. Dad could never part with his Dad's stuff. These are not really antiques either. Just stuff like brushes, chisels, punches, etc. Tools that haven't been used for 60 years. I can verify that antique brushes - despite being made with quality camel hair or something - still disintegrate due to the ravages of time. Oh boy. Oh, and physics in the 30's was the same as today. Guess what? Iron and steel still pit and rust. A straight edge razor not used for 60 years, despite being stainless, still pits and rots.

When we're done with this, I'm going home to make hard decisions on my stuff and do an early downsize. This process is tough, tough, tough.

Make it easy on your kids or whoever will look after you some day. With ER, you now have time to live simple and get rid of it. Whatever it is. You don't need it.
__________________

__________________
When you walk in the shadow of insanity, the presence of another mind that thinks and acts as yours does is something close to a blessed event. -Robert Pirsig, Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance
panhead is offline   Reply With Quote
Join the #1 Early Retirement and Financial Independence Forum Today - It's Totally Free!

Are you planning to be financially independent as early as possible so you can live life on your own terms? Discuss successful investing strategies, asset allocation models, tax strategies and other related topics in our online forum community. Our members range from young folks just starting their journey to financial independence, military retirees and even multimillionaires. No matter where you fit in you'll find that Early-Retirement.org is a great community to join. Best of all it's totally FREE!

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest so you have limited access to our community. Please take the time to register and you will gain a lot of great new features including; the ability to participate in discussions, network with our members, see fewer ads, upload photographs, create a retirement blog, send private messages and so much, much more!

Old 05-13-2013, 10:14 AM   #42
Recycles dryer sheets
Semiretired2008's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2012
Location: Central Ga
Posts: 230
We have been working on cleaning out the excess for two years now. We still have about two more years of clearing / cleaning to go. We are taking our time, but our (or at least mine) goal is to reduce to below what is necessary and then build back up to what we would call the ultimate and still reduced level...

We are not going to the minimalist level, but it might be close. I want to be light enough that I could move on a whim... The hardest part is agreeing on what we "need" and what we do not need to keep and my kids have laid claim to a lot, but are unable to take claim to their claims - I do not want to be a storage facility until they feel they are ready or they change their minds...
__________________

__________________
If you want someone to believe in you - First you have to believe in yourself and then you go from there...
Semiretired2008 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-13-2013, 06:10 PM   #43
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Jan 2013
Posts: 92
About 18 months ago we moved from a 3,500 sf house to a 1,400 sf house. We had filled the house over 15 years with all kinds of stuff, but we were forced to purge. Overall, it was exhilarating. When we got stuck, we'd watch about 10 episodes of hoarders, and then it got really easy. Amazing how many trophies and ribbons the three kiddos won I've the years -- we lined them up, took some photos, then gave them all away (I think they may have kept one or two).

We made the decision that we didn't want to be like my wife's parents, who have every homework assignment their kids ever had. Every closet is jammed, and the attic is stuffed full. Never going to be us.
__________________
Unpaintedhuffhines is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-13-2013, 07:18 PM   #44
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Apr 2013
Location: Fishers
Posts: 385
First downsizing from 3800 sq. ft. 2 story to 2800 sq. ft. ranch 5 years ago as a pre-step for ER. Still have 2 yrs. to ER. Will step down to approx. 1500 sq. ft. at that point. Eliminated alot of stuff in first move so next one will be less of a hassle.
__________________
wmc1000 is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-27-2013, 09:47 AM   #45
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Live And Learn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Tampa Bay Area
Posts: 1,689
Update - we will close on the smaller1500 sq ft home in two weeks. I'm still purging. I finally threw away my Business Law textbook from 1985 ! And my Biology textbook from 1987 ! I wanted to sit down and read some from each of them just for the laugh as I'm sure alot of the info is now proven wrong or no longer in use. I'm having a VERY hard time letting go of furniture however. It was all carefully handpicked. I'm having to cram my furniture into the new rooms. I figure I'll give it a shot and maybe if I feel uncomfortable with the situation after the move that I can sell and replace with smaller furniture at that time.

I was pleasantly surprised by the limited junk in the attic. The kitchen will be a nightmare as I have multiples of alot of things (three potato peelers, really ?). I don't have alot of knick-knacks so that won't be an issue either. But I HATE moving, so I'm just not looking forward to this. I keep telling myself that the move is what is enabling my ER, since I'll be saving about $10k / year on housing costs -- meaning I'm able to leave w*rk without having to save another $300k to support the current house. That's about three years of w*rk that I avoid. Gotta love that.
__________________
"For the time being no discipline brings joy, but seems grievous and painful; but afterwards it yields a peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it." ~
Hebrews 12:11

ER'd in June 2015 at age 52. Initial WR 3%. 50/40/10 (Equity/Bond/Short Term) AA.
Live And Learn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-27-2013, 05:58 PM   #46
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
 
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 5,326
Quote:
Originally Posted by Live And Learn View Post
I keep telling myself that the move is what is enabling my ER, since I'll be saving about $10k / year on housing costs -- meaning I'm able to leave w*rk without having to save another $300k to support the current house. That's about three years of w*rk that I avoid. Gotta love that.
I like your math.

We looked at townhouses this weekend that would cost half of what our current home should sell for. Besides the lower home cost, we are looking forward to minimal yard maintenance and lower utility bills.

We have 1,000 sq feet of furniture and clutter that we either have to get rid before we move of or put into storage. I'd like to just get rid of it but I am not sure how long it will take. It has taken years to accumulate.
__________________
daylatedollarshort is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-27-2013, 06:03 PM   #47
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
 
Join Date: Feb 2013
Posts: 5,326
Quote:
Originally Posted by Semiretired2008 View Post
We are not going to the minimalist level, but it might be close. I want to be light enough that I could move on a whim.
I remember the days of being younger and moving apartments every year or so when the lease was up. It was fairly easy. We'd buy pizza, get a bunch of friends to help and we were done in a weekend. I never felt like I was lacking anything in terms of material goods back then. I don't know why we have so much stuff now.
__________________
daylatedollarshort is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-27-2013, 06:08 PM   #48
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
RockyMtn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: North Scottsdale
Posts: 1,230
Quote:
Originally Posted by daylatedollarshort View Post
I remember the days of being younger and moving apartments every year or so when the lease was up. It was fairly easy. We'd buy pizza, get a bunch of friends to help and we were done in a weekend. I never felt like I was lacking anything in terms of material goods back then. I don't know why we have so much stuff now.
ah, the good old days of moving with garbage sacks instead of boxes!
__________________
FIRE'D in July 2009 at 51...Never look back!
RockyMtn is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-27-2013, 06:44 PM   #49
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Major Tom's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: SF East Bay
Posts: 3,129
Quote:
Originally Posted by RockyMtn View Post
ah, the good old days of moving with garbage sacks instead of boxes!
Load up the car for a few trips, maybe call a friend with a truck for the sofa, and you're done!
__________________
ER, for all intents and purposes. Part-time income <5% of annual expenditure.
Major Tom is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-27-2013, 07:17 PM   #50
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Huston55's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: The Bay Area
Posts: 1,801
Quote:
Originally Posted by Live And Learn View Post
Update - we will close on the smaller1500 sq ft home in two weeks. I'm still purging. I finally threw away my Business Law textbook from 1985 ! And my Biology textbook from 1987 ! I wanted to sit down and read some from each of them just for the laugh as I'm sure alot of the info is now proven wrong or no longer in use. I'm having a VERY hard time letting go of furniture however. It was all carefully handpicked. I'm having to cram my furniture into the new rooms. I figure I'll give it a shot and maybe if I feel uncomfortable with the situation after the move that I can sell and replace with smaller furniture at that time.

I was pleasantly surprised by the limited junk in the attic. The kitchen will be a nightmare as I have multiples of alot of things (three potato peelers, really ?). I don't have alot of knick-knacks so that won't be an issue either. But I HATE moving, so I'm just not looking forward to this. I keep telling myself that the move is what is enabling my ER, since I'll be saving about $10k / year on housing costs -- meaning I'm able to leave w*rk without having to save another $300k to support the current house. That's about three years of w*rk that I avoid. Gotta love that.
L&L-

It's exciting tracking your moving and downsizing progress. Sounds like its going well for you all. I especially like the $10k/$300k/3yr rationale; smart thinking!

If you don't mind saying what planned community you're moving to, I'd be interested; if you choose not to for privacy reasons, no worries. I'm interested because DW and I plan to move to FL for retirement.
__________________
You may be whatever you resolve to be.
Huston55 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2013, 08:31 AM   #51
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
JoeWras's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2012
Posts: 2,518
We just had a big tag sale for mom and dad's stuff. Mostly all knick knack kind of stuff. Nearly got $700 from that little stuff. Dad was happy to hear that.

All the important mementos went to the grand kids. Yet, siblings and I had to make some difficult choices and let a lot go. We did, and in the process, saw some delight on the part of purchasers.

It was great to see a young mother delight over a $5 iron. Or the student who took our cooking set.

The hard part was figuring if we had antiques. We looked a lot up and demanded bigger prices for suspected items. A few sold.

Meanwhile, we probably let some go for nothing and someone out there may be making $100's profit. You know what? That's OK. It might have ended up in the dump anyway.

Man, this process has been difficult.
__________________
JoeWras is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 05-28-2013, 01:26 PM   #52
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Live And Learn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Tampa Bay Area
Posts: 1,689
JoeWras, I hear you on the process. I threw out the first thing I ever bought myself with my first paycheck - from when I was 16 !!! It was a jacket - about 10 sizes too small now. I've moved it from house to house all these years. Crazy stuff. On the other hand I look at the furniture I've lovingly picked out over the years and it tears me apart to think I might have to part with it.

Huston - there are so many planned communities in Florida that probably makes more sense for you to determine the part of the state / city you'd like first. Don't limit yourself. Visit a few cities and see what you like. I am on the Gulf Coast, which is nice, but the water gets to be 90F during the summer, which is just gross. The East (Ocean) coast has cooler water, better waves at the beach, and better salt water fishing. But this where my family is, which is why I love it here.
__________________
"For the time being no discipline brings joy, but seems grievous and painful; but afterwards it yields a peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it." ~
Hebrews 12:11

ER'd in June 2015 at age 52. Initial WR 3%. 50/40/10 (Equity/Bond/Short Term) AA.
Live And Learn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-15-2013, 12:06 PM   #53
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Live And Learn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Tampa Bay Area
Posts: 1,689
I have a new motto "too much space, too much waste" ! Going through my accumulated stuff I realize I have duplicates and triplicates of way too many things. It hurts that I wasted all that money ! Most of the stuff was purchased before the great recession crash, before I really hunkered down, but it still gives me pause. With the new limited space I'm hoping to avoid buying duplicates, hoping that I'll be better able to track current inventory.
__________________
"For the time being no discipline brings joy, but seems grievous and painful; but afterwards it yields a peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it." ~
Hebrews 12:11

ER'd in June 2015 at age 52. Initial WR 3%. 50/40/10 (Equity/Bond/Short Term) AA.
Live And Learn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-15-2013, 02:19 PM   #54
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Oct 2012
Location: Colorado Mountains
Posts: 2,135
Wish I had the time to go through my stuff. The townhouse I am renting sold and I decided to retire. I get a rental truck the end of the month, pack up the truck and I'm on my way to Colorado. The stuff goes in a storage unit for a couple years while I build a cabin. Maybe by then I won' t be so attached to the stuff.
__________________
Hermit is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 06-15-2013, 02:32 PM   #55
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Apr 2010
Posts: 1,682
When we downsized we were also preparing our home for sale which meant paining every room.

We did it room by room but with one rule. Anything in the room was either packed in boxes and those boxes moved to the garage in preparation for moving. What we did not want did not go back in the room...we had a central place for keeping items that we were either giving away, sending to Goodwill, or discarding. We were not about to move the same items again and again-once was enough.

We gave away a lot of furniture to relatives-bedroom sets and living room sets, etc. We only had one rule...if you want it come and get it within a week otherwise is goes to Goodwill. That rule helped a lot.

So now were are back after travelling for 8 months we have decided to rent a 2br. condo for a while. We do not feel compelled to buy and this in itself is liberating. We move in next week but we both realize that we have items in our storage container that we should not have kept. So we have yet another round of downsizing ahead of us!
__________________
brett is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-15-2013, 05:08 PM   #56
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Huston55's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: The Bay Area
Posts: 1,801
I don't know if its contagious or what but, we're also going through a another purge. We've moved frequently over the past 30+ yrs and have up sized and downsized several times. We're probably somewhere in the middle, size wise, now; living in a 3BR/2BA, 2400sf condo. We have a small storage unit with this condo but, downsized from >4000sf house with a 2 car garage and full basement. So, lots of remaining stuff.

So, at DW's urging insistence, we've started sorting and purging the stuff in the storage unit. Actually, we started a few months ago. Sold lots of stuff on Craigslist, donated a bit, and had lots of it hauled away. That was most of the big stuff. Now, we're sorting through the smaller stuff, lots of mementos, and getting rid of the excess.

Our goal is to fit into a 2BR/2BA, ~1500sf condo when we retire within the next year. I have to admit, it's somewhat liberating.
__________________
You may be whatever you resolve to be.
Huston55 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-15-2013, 07:07 PM   #57
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Live And Learn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Tampa Bay Area
Posts: 1,689
Quote:
Originally Posted by Huston55 View Post
Our goal is to fit into a 2BR/2BA, ~1500sf condo when we retire within the next year. I have to admit, it's somewhat liberating.
I think it SHOULD be liberating ...... its the "getting there" that is causing anxiety. Part of the anxitey is that I have p*ssed away money. The rest is that I like the perceived "comfort" my "stuff" gives me. Interesting dynamic.
__________________
"For the time being no discipline brings joy, but seems grievous and painful; but afterwards it yields a peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it." ~
Hebrews 12:11

ER'd in June 2015 at age 52. Initial WR 3%. 50/40/10 (Equity/Bond/Short Term) AA.
Live And Learn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2013, 06:32 AM   #58
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Dec 2012
Posts: 145
Monday, we are closing on a new house. And it's not a smaller one, so we are going to be migrating in the opposite direction of downsizing.

We sold our primary house in October 2011 and "by inertia" downsized into our second house. But it has proven too small for the way my wife and I live. So it's going to be back to a house with a 2-car instead of a 1-car garage, a big workshop outbuilding, 2 bathrooms instead of 1, and 3 more rooms than we have now in our "second" house.

The big difference is that we are buying this new house for 61% of what we sold our primary house for in 2011, and the mortgage payment is going to almost exactly work out to be half of what the old one was.

Alex in Virginia
__________________
making the most of my time and my money
Alex in Virginia is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2013, 07:56 AM   #59
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Live And Learn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Tampa Bay Area
Posts: 1,689
Quote:
Originally Posted by Alex in Virginia View Post
The big difference is that we are buying this new house for 61% of what we sold our primary house for in 2011, and the mortgage payment is going to almost exactly work out to be half of what the old one was.

Alex in Virginia
Wow - thats fantastic ! Good luck with the move.
__________________
"For the time being no discipline brings joy, but seems grievous and painful; but afterwards it yields a peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it." ~
Hebrews 12:11

ER'd in June 2015 at age 52. Initial WR 3%. 50/40/10 (Equity/Bond/Short Term) AA.
Live And Learn is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 06-16-2013, 07:59 AM   #60
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Live And Learn's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Tampa Bay Area
Posts: 1,689
Quote:
Originally Posted by brett View Post
When we downsized we were also preparing our home for sale which meant paining every room.

We did it room by room but with one rule. Anything in the room was either packed in boxes and those boxes moved to the garage in preparation for moving. What we did not want did not go back in the room...we had a central place for keeping items that we were either giving away, sending to Goodwill, or discarding. We were not about to move the same items again and again-once was enough.
I have three boxes and a garbage pail with me as I pack. Taking lessons from "Hoarder - buried alive". "Keep", "Donate", "Sell" and the garbage pail for "throw it away". It works well. As I pick up each item I think to myself "would I care if it broke or got lost during the move". If the answer is no, it does NOT go into the "keep" box.
__________________

__________________
"For the time being no discipline brings joy, but seems grievous and painful; but afterwards it yields a peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it." ~
Hebrews 12:11

ER'd in June 2015 at age 52. Initial WR 3%. 50/40/10 (Equity/Bond/Short Term) AA.
Live And Learn is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


 

 
All times are GMT -6. The time now is 09:31 AM.
 
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.