Economic Outpatient Care

[Bestwifeever]

DH's grandfather was "the richest man in town" in a very small town in the midwest and gave each of his three sons a home. DH's father gave his kids each a car (but we have them our car back as we did not need it) and a downpayment on a house. DH and I gave each of our kids a car (of course they cost more than the home DH's father received from his father). Wonder what our kids will give their kids.... On the other hand the typical gifts from DH's parents through the years have always been quite thrifty; my parents passed away before we were married/had children so no "help" there and I miss them every single day. $$ not important--we would still have been able to buy our home without DH's father's help. DH's father and grandfather's generation did feel entitled, but not DH's generation and certainly not our kids who work hard and are better off than we are financially. We paid for their college and daughter's wedding--if blessed with grandchildren we will certainly be enjoying ourselves by thinking of them.

 

[youbet]

The concept that gifting surplus assets to the kiddies always creates some sort of undesirable obligation on the part of the kids to the parents is only true in some cases. In many cases, the ongoing parent - child obligatory link is established strictly though emotional ties developed through the child rearing years. No monetary or other asset transfer may be involved, or even possible. The child may simply have protective, family-oriented tendencies and naturally just want to be part of the ongoing extended family team. Driving an elderly parent to get groceries once a week is a natural act of kindness for one child, a hellish obligation for another.

And, sometimes it's the kids, not the parents, who seek the ties in those cases where monetary transfers are involved. For example, we've listened to young people right on this board moan and groan that the Bank of Mom and Dad could easily have helped them more though college, could have easily provided a down payment for a first home, could have had nursing care under Medicaid instead of private pay, etc., and instead spent the money on themselves or gifted it to others. Or the whining when one sibling recieves more than another. Yuuuch.

 

[Nords]

I never grew up with the opportunity to make any withdrawals from the Bank of Mom and Dad, but as a new parent, I don't think that giving your kid some money to help them get started is in itself a bad idea. BUT, you have to have raised them right with proper understanding on the value of money, how to manage it, and how to build wealth, otherwise your just throwing your money away.

musings on personal finance

I feel as if I've just been spammed to generate blog traffic.

Would you mind showing me what specific topic at your link corresponds to this thread on outpatient economic care?