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Old 07-14-2009, 02:34 PM   #21
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Most of the Dear Abby etc. letters are complaints about an in-law.
The penalty for bigamy is more than one set of in-laws.
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Old 07-14-2009, 03:47 PM   #22
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I have a brother-in-law obsess with his hair being extremely short so EVERY two three weeks he would call and bother my wife on Sunday, (the only day of the week where both my wife and I get a day off) and beg for a free hair cut. It was all fine and dandy til 4th, 5th, 6th, 7th, 8th... time but I can NOT take it anymore. So I sent him an email asking him not to bother us anymore. Guess what, he came and sweet talk my wife again and she starts to feel sorry for him and beginning to give in.

What am I to do?? Am I too greedy? Keep in mind my bil will live another 40 years, how many damm hair cut are we gonna have to do? DW wants to move to get away but forgot that he drives too. A typical Sunday for us is jam packed. With two young children, a deteriorating house, a business, a mil to care for, we are lucky to have 1 hr to ourselves.

Please, someone tells me what to do....
buy him this...you will not see him again

PersonalEdge - Canada #1 Online Store For Electric Men's Shavers, Women Grooming, Hair Care, Health Care Items

I use it once a week...its great for keeping one's short hair very short (you can set it from 1/8th to half an inch or so)

and it fires the barber
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Old 07-14-2009, 05:46 PM   #23
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Tell him to get his own girlfriend/wife to cut his hair. My girlfriend cuts my hair every 2 or 3 weeks short the way I like it.
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Old 07-14-2009, 06:21 PM   #24
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Hi, Joe 24816, there should to be a prize for lurking 2-1/2 years and then posting on this topic.

I say welcome even though you've been here longer than I have.
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Old 07-14-2009, 07:42 PM   #25
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Thanks Joe! I like mostly reading the forums as they are very informative. I do my learning by reading, not writing .
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Old 07-14-2009, 08:18 PM   #26
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Tell him to get his own girlfriend/wife to cut his hair. My girlfriend cuts my hair every 2 or 3 weeks short the way I like it.
There's your solution, Enuf2eat--send your BIL over to Joe's girlfriend when he needs a trim!

Also, welcome, Joe!
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Old 07-14-2009, 08:29 PM   #27
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Old 07-14-2009, 09:05 PM   #28
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I have a brother-in-law obsess with his hair being extremely short so EVERY two three weeks he would call and bother my wife on Sunday, (the only day of the week where both my wife and I get a day off) and beg for a free hair cut. It was all fine and dandy til 4th, 5th, 6th, 7th, 8th... time but I can NOT take it anymore. So I sent him an email asking him not to bother us anymore. Guess what, he came and sweet talk my wife again and she starts to feel sorry for him and beginning to give in.

What am I to do?? Am I too greedy? Keep in mind my bil will live another 40 years, how many damm hair cut are we gonna have to do? DW wants to move to get away but forgot that he drives too. A typical Sunday for us is jam packed. With two young children, a deteriorating house, a business, a mil to care for, we are lucky to have 1 hr to ourselves.

Please, someone tells me what to do....
Are you his only family? Perhaps he feels lonely. Stop being a prick.
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Old 07-14-2009, 10:51 PM   #29
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Are you his only family? Perhaps he feels lonely. Stop being a prick.
His other sister live about 2 min walks with her husband and their children and his other brother is another 2 min walks, also have a wife and kids. Their spouses will not tolerate him living in their house like the way he lived with us. I used to be the "good" guy. I guess I am Jerk now.
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Old 07-15-2009, 10:17 AM   #30
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maybe buy him a membership:

www.eharmony.com
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Old 07-15-2009, 12:34 PM   #31
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Ohhh... I forgot to answer the question...

Cheapskate
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Old 07-15-2009, 01:14 PM   #32
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Ohhh... I forgot to answer the question...

Cheapskate
Ditto....
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Old 07-15-2009, 01:22 PM   #33
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after re-reading the postings and thinking a bit...

I have seen a pattern where socially maladjusted individuals, who are incapable of maintaining normal balanced winwin tit-for-tat mutually beneficial relationships, end up in parasitic relationships with "kind-hearted" (wuss) relatives. I think they call this co-dependence.

This totally different than showing compassion for a widowed or divorced aunt or sister or the elderly or disabled.

I am not sure that enabling this guy is good for him. The upside is that DW will have a buddy to move in when they are old and you are in the ground.

Given that he will not respond to a direct order from you, and that DW is not going to put her foot down, maybe think in terms of pest control...like dealing with pigeons....look for ways to make his visits uncomfortable.

Play music that he does not like.

When he arrives, insist that he help you for a few minutes with carrying something or moving something.

Ask him to pick something up on the way over....forget to pay him.

When they do the haircut ceremony, subtly interfere...sit close by and watch, with a weird stare...take an interest and insist on doing some final trimming. Offer to cut his toenails.

make him coffee and be sure to do it in a way he does not like

key question - lets say you are on a trip or something and DL needs help with something....is he available to jump in...or is he just a user?
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Old 07-15-2009, 02:24 PM   #34
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key question - lets say you are on a trip or something and DL needs help with something....is he available to jump in...or is he just a user?

honest answer. Yes but reluctantly so we don't ask.

He does helps a little around and at time we appreciate him too.
Don't get me wrong, he is a good person but the "favors" that he did for us is nothing compare to what we do for him (only IMO). The stupidity is on my part. I am so afraid of asking him to do anything, because he will ask me 6 times more for returing the favor.

I was wondering If I am in the rough, will he put me in his house for a year? No. Someone told me once "too comfortable = abusive". If you are nice, people can get "comfortable" and abuse the relationship. I guess, this my bottom line feelings.

again, I am just unloading. thanks all.
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Old 07-15-2009, 02:38 PM   #35
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Problem solved.
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