Join Early Retirement Today
Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
How do I get my GF interested in preparing for her long term financial future?
Old 10-21-2011, 02:58 PM   #1
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Mulligan's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 7,376
How do I get my GF interested in preparing for her long term financial future?

Looking for some advise,as I see a small window of opportunity I want to exploit. My GF of 5 years, has finally gotten to the point financially with a new job, that she can really start to do some investing for her retirement. She is in her early 40's but only has about 30k in a previous employers 401k. She has been with this company for a year, and is about to become eligible for company 401k match of 3%. She has come through a couple of layoffs the past 7-8 years including one just over a year ago. She is doing an excellent job of LBYM, not raising her lifestyle despite a 50% job in salary of a still modest 60k or so. The trouble is I can't get her past her " hoarding cash mentality" , putting over $1,000 a month in a savings account drawing nothing. It took a month and Devine intervention for me to get her to put $5k in an I Bond this month. She has enough now that if she was laid off again with unemployment, she can make it a year. BTW- her job looks very solid for at least 2 years due to the long term project they are working on.
How do I get her to transition from " hoarding cash", to some modest if not even low risk investing. Any advise on how to get her to take an interest in this? I believe I can get her to do the 3% to capture the company match on 401k, but any more will require some skills I need assistance in. She stands to gain tax wise long term from tax deferred investing. I'm sure she has no clue what her SS benefits will be, or " what her number needs to be" when she retires, or taxation rates and their long term effects. She is in her 40s and doesn't realize she is way behind, which I also need to dance around without insulting her. She has the first two skills down... No debt and LBYM. She needs to be nudged into the last realm of invest in your future. Any ideas that I could use that might help?
__________________

__________________
Mulligan is online now   Reply With Quote
Join the #1 Early Retirement and Financial Independence Forum Today - It's Totally Free!

Are you planning to be financially independent as early as possible so you can live life on your own terms? Discuss successful investing strategies, asset allocation models, tax strategies and other related topics in our online forum community. Our members range from young folks just starting their journey to financial independence, military retirees and even multimillionaires. No matter where you fit in you'll find that Early-Retirement.org is a great community to join. Best of all it's totally FREE!

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest so you have limited access to our community. Please take the time to register and you will gain a lot of great new features including; the ability to participate in discussions, network with our members, see fewer ads, upload photographs, create a retirement blog, send private messages and so much, much more!

Old 10-21-2011, 03:19 PM   #2
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
GregLee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Waimanalo, HI
Posts: 1,881
You could keep her posted on how your own investment portfolio is doing, day by day. If I tell my wife that the value of our portfolio is up for the day, she will be mildly interested, but when I tell her we lost a few thousand, she immediately becomes intensely interested.
__________________

__________________
Greg (retired in 2010 at age 68, state pension)
GregLee is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2011, 03:27 PM   #3
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
travelover's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 9,878
I've never had much luck leading a horse to water, but maybe it would help if you did a "what if" retirement plan for her on a spread sheet. If she could see the gap between what she will need and what SS will provide, it might excite her interest in higher earning opportunities.

You could also use a free program like the one available from Fidelity.
__________________
Yes, I have achieved work / life balance.
travelover is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2011, 03:41 PM   #4
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
steelyman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Triangle
Posts: 3,218
You could point her to the well-commented thread suze orman says.... in these forums. The thought of being sentenced to Ms. Orman's mandate of having to work until you're 67 might cause someone to think things through and take a little action.
__________________
steelyman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2011, 04:12 PM   #5
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Mulligan's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 7,376
Quote:
Originally Posted by GregLee
You could keep her posted on how your own investment portfolio is doing, day by day. If I tell my wife that the value of our portfolio is up for the day, she will be mildly interested, but when I tell her we lost a few thousand, she immediately becomes intensely interested.
That's a good point. I have only recently constructed a portfolio, partially because my pension is so good I really don't need one. I only in the past 5 years have decided, I shouldn't trust the system 100% and add another stool to the financial leg. We are on opposite ends. I'm a retired ER on a pension and she is an out in the private world 401k , no pension, no great hope for ER person. But if I can steer her right, she can still have a comfortable lifestyle in her mid sixties.
__________________
Mulligan is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2011, 04:20 PM   #6
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
haha's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Hooverville
Posts: 22,382
Your thread title appeared promising. What happened?
__________________
"As a general rule, the more dangerous or inappropriate a conversation, the more interesting it is."-Scott Adams
haha is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2011, 04:27 PM   #7
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
GregLee's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Waimanalo, HI
Posts: 1,881
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mulligan View Post
I have only recently constructed a portfolio, ...
How about this? Construct a hypothetical portfolio for her at Morningstar, Morningstar Stock, Mutual Fund, Bond, ETF Investment Research, so she can track how much she would be making (or losing). It's free.
__________________
Greg (retired in 2010 at age 68, state pension)
GregLee is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2011, 04:28 PM   #8
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Moemg's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Sarasota,fl.
Posts: 10,031
Go to the bookstore and buy her a simple financial book aimed at women . Then take her on a vacation to Florida where everybody is early retired and play all day . This combination should do it .
__________________
Moemg is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2011, 04:30 PM   #9
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Mulligan's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 7,376
Quote:
Originally Posted by haha
Your thread title appeared promising. What happened?
She is probably typing THAT in another forum about ME! I need a stunt double
__________________
Mulligan is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2011, 04:41 PM   #10
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
steelyman's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2011
Location: Triangle
Posts: 3,218
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mulligan View Post
I have only recently constructed a portfolio, partially because my pension is so good I really don't need one. I only in the past 5 years have decided, I shouldn't trust the system 100% and add another stool to the financial leg.
Discuss/share the performance of your own portfolio with her. If she were to start investing today, it doesn't seem that she would be far behind you with respect to investing.
__________________
steelyman is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2011, 04:42 PM   #11
Full time employment: Posting here.
Lakedog's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 654
Maybe she expects (hopes) that you will marry her and provide a survivor benefit (from your pension) -- problem solved without all that saving/investing.
__________________
Lakedog is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2011, 04:45 PM   #12
Administrator
W2R's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: New Orleans
Posts: 38,846
I find that I can't force people to change. All I can do is lead by example, and be open and available if there are questions. It might take years before she has questions, too.

The more you push her, the more she might resist. It's human nature.
__________________
Already we are boldly launched upon the deep; but soon we shall be lost in its unshored, harbourless immensities.

- - H. Melville, 1851
W2R is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2011, 05:08 PM   #13
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Mulligan's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 7,376
Quote:
Originally Posted by W2R
I find that I can't force people to change. All I can do is lead by example, and be open and available if there are questions. It might take years before she has questions, too.

The more you push her, the more she might resist. It's human nature.
That is definitely HER nature. It can't be a full out assault saying she is going to die a homeless beggar or she will probably go on a spending free



Maybe she expects (hopes) that you will marry her and provide a survivor benefit (from your pension) -- problem solved without all that saving/investing.

I don't know if she is thinking that or not, but that ship has passed. I signed on for option 1, paying max benefits until I die. Although that would be strong incentive for her to keep me alive.
__________________
Mulligan is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2011, 05:51 PM   #14
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
travelover's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 9,878
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mulligan View Post
........Although that would be strong incentive for her to keep me alive.

Good start. Now don't go buying any life insurance.
__________________
Yes, I have achieved work / life balance.
travelover is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2011, 06:29 PM   #15
Full time employment: Posting here.
Lakedog's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 654
Quote:
Originally Posted by Mulligan View Post
I don't know if she is thinking that or not, but that ship has passed. I signed on for option 1, paying max benefits until I die. Although that would be strong incentive for her to keep me alive.
Some retirement systems (such as feds) allow you to change the selection if your marital status changes in retirement but you may not have that option. My previous comment was mostly in jest though.
__________________
Lakedog is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2011, 06:56 PM   #16
Moderator
MichaelB's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Rocky Inlets
Posts: 24,426
If she has been laid off more than once and / or had financial difficulties in the past her behaviour is not unusual. Her fears are rational and in her mind she is taking action to address them. She doesn't need someone to tell her she is wrong but she might use some help to approach her goals in a more effective way.

The first thing she probably needs is a saving option to maximize the return on her cash. Maybe a CD ladder, which is FDIC insured, starting with small amounts and shorter maturities, then building on that. If she agrees, then help her quantify how much she needs in cash-like financial assets to reach whatever goal she has in mind and help her build a plan to get there. If she could put a number to that objective that would be a big step forward.

If the only way to address your goals (for her) is to first achieve hers, that is the best way to help her.
__________________
MichaelB is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2011, 09:50 PM   #17
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Helen's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2004
Location: Portland
Posts: 1,343
Could you get her to fund a Roth and put the money in bonds? You can tell her she can take out the principal penalty and tax free at any time. That way she is at least parking money away in the Roth account and you may get her to invest it in stocks later on.

Baby steps.
__________________
Helen is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2011, 09:55 PM   #18
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
harley's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2008
Location: Following the nice weather
Posts: 6,422
Quote:
Originally Posted by haha View Post
Your thread title appeared promising. What happened?
I thought so too. In my window I only get part of the title, so I saw "How do I get my GF interested". I was ready to take notes.
__________________
"Good judgment comes from experience. Experience comes from bad judgement." - Will Rogers, or maybe Sam Clemens
DW and I - FIREd at 50 (7/06), living off assets
harley is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-21-2011, 11:26 PM   #19
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
haha's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2003
Location: Hooverville
Posts: 22,382
Quote:
Originally Posted by harley View Post
I thought so too. In my window I only get part of the title, so I saw "How do I get my GF interested". I was ready to take notes.
That is what I saw too- I thought, oh boy, what could there be that you might have to sell to GF in today's world?

This is a nice thread, but a little flat by contrast.

Ha
__________________
"As a general rule, the more dangerous or inappropriate a conversation, the more interesting it is."-Scott Adams
haha is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 10-22-2011, 04:08 AM   #20
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
obgyn65's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Location: midwestern city
Posts: 4,061
Not sure that should do it. It is challenging to make people interested in FIRE if they are not.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Moemg View Post
Then take her on a vacation to Florida where everybody is early retired and play all day . This combination should do it .
__________________

__________________
Very conservative with investments. Not ER'd yet, 48 years old. Please do not take anything I write or imply as legal, financial or medical advice directed to you. Contact your own financial advisor, healthcare provider, or attorney for financial, medical and legal advice.
obgyn65 is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
US Pulls plug on Long Term Care portion of health care reformct ("CLASS Act") samclem Other topics 14 10-15-2011 11:27 AM
Seattle, WA long term parking BillNOVA Travel Information 2 08-28-2011 04:34 PM
Are we are LONG on Short Term thinking? Chuckanut FIRE and Money 5 08-15-2011 01:50 PM

 

 
All times are GMT -6. The time now is 07:24 AM.
 
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.