A true friend wouldn't ask that either... because they probably already know the answer!
I was saving this for Veteran's Day, but what the heck. This one probably dates back to the Civil War-- it's the military difference between "friend" and "shipmate":
CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Get upset if you're too busy to talk to them for a week.
VETERAN FRIENDS: Are glad to see you after years, and will happily carry on the same conversation you were having the last time you met.
CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Have never seen you cry.
VETERAN FRIENDS: Have cried with you.
CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Borrow your stuff for a few days then give it back.
VETERAN FRIENDS: Keep your stuff so long they forget it's yours.
CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Know a few things about you.
VETERAN FRIENDS: Could write a book with direct quotes from you.
CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Will leave you behind if that's what the crowd is doing.
VETERAN FRIENDS: Will kick the crowds' ass that left you behind.
CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Have shared a few experiences.
VETERAN FRIENDS: Have shared a lifetime of experiences no citizen could ever dream of.
CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Will take your drink away when they think you've had enough.
VETERAN FRIENDS: Will look at you stumbling all over the place and say, "You better drink the rest of that before you spill it!" Then they get you home safely and put you in your bed-- or on their
CIVILIAN FRIENDS: Are for a while.
VETERAN FRIENDS: Are for life.