"Just one more year"...

Nords,
Thanks for sharing this. I'm glad he seemed to enjoy his work and found value in providing for the material needs of his family, but if they had been given a vote, I'm sure they would have swapped a few $$ per month for a chance to have a few more picnics.
And the takeaway for my situation: "You jumped off the full-time career train to have more time for family and yourself. Are you getting maximum enjoyment from those hours each day? Or, are you frittering them away?" As I find re-learn every day, one doesn't have to be at the office to be wasting time.

Thanks again.
 
Sorry Nords. And thanks for sharing. As always, you have provided much food for thought. Although your friend was called home suddenly, it seems that he had lived his life on his own terms and provided well for the ones he loved.
At the same time, since I don't know when my time will come, your friend's tale has given me added encouragement to achieve my FIRE goal and even to question if I should pull the cord earlier and share more time and attention with the ones I love. Thank you for that, and may God bless your friend's family in their time of loss.
 
I'm so sorry about the loss of your friend. It really makes us take a look at our own longevity. I really feel for his widow, whose hopes and plans for the future are now dashed. So very sad.

Recently I've been identifying things that I want to spend my time on, not things that I actually spend my time doing. Time to make a few changes
 
Very sorry for the loss of your friend. Despite the fact that your friend apparently was very successful at work and enjoyed this, I can't help but think that he would have really enjoyed spending more time with family and doing other things rather than pushing himself into his mid 60's still working and apparently living below means/saving. Not passing judgement, just talking out loud here. I credit my wife with teachng me to spend some money and enjoy the journey...life is fragile. I'm in healthcare and see situations like this daily, often persons in their 50 and 60's.
 
So sorry about your friend--and your helping the family now and being there for them are more signs that you were his true friend.

I think he died doing what made him happy from what you've posted here. And look at the outpouring from people he had worked with in both his careers--he had a second family in them.
 
Nords, my condolences. It sounds like you are being a good friend to the widow and family.

As others have said, your friend sounds like he wasn't discontent working. This is a good wakeup call, however, for those who really do want to get out and ER.
 
Nords, so sorry for the loss of your friend. I know you will miss him. After reading your poignant post, I am reminded of the saying:
"Life is what happens while you are busy planning your future".

Truth is, none of us know and we can only do the best we can.

Your friend passed while living as he did every day. There is something to be said for that.

Take care of yourself in the days, weeks and months to come.
 
Nords, I'm so sorry to hear about your friend.
 
I'm sad for you -- the loss of a friend is always devastating.
But I look at it this way. He had a good life, he did it his way, and I suspect he may not even have had any real plans for his later "idle years."
The only better way to go, IMHO, would be in your sleep, so he even did that in an efficient, military manner.
His life should be celebrated, his death not regretted unduly.

Me, I'm like you, and a 20 year military career was enough (OK, 21, but there were reasons).
Your friend charted his own course, and was apparently very content with it.

Bottom line, your point about enjoying our brief time on the planet is well taken, and I think your friend probably did that in his own way.
 
My condolences as well. And thank you for sharing well written account in your current emotional state.
 
Thanks, everyone. You've pointed out some gaps in my attempt to describe the situation, and I'll be writing more.

Funeral on Tuesday, followed by a potluck memorial for 150 people. My friend apparently has a legendary reputation for helping Hawaii Army servicemembers & veterans.
 
Very sorry to hear this. It can happen to anyone. My neighbor keeled over in his garage about 20 years ago. He was 25 or so. Aneurism. You just never know. As long as he was happy with what he was doing, your friend lived a good life, retired or not.
 
Nords:

Thanks for posting and sharing. As a fellow military member, this forum and your book are really making me re-think where I want to go w/ my life, esp since I have school age kids right now. I struggle between staying in, a bridge career or pushing for ER so I can spend more time w/ them while they're young. I am so glad I came across this site to let me know there are many options out there vs "just one more year."

Mahalo, my friend.
 
Wow ... that sucks.

Reminds me of my FIL ... retired in May on his 65th b-day. Died in August of a anuerism.
 
Met a guy who said he does "LWD days" monthly (Live like you Were Dying).

He goes out and does "something he was always putting off doing".

He's working now - he plans to keep adding monthly LWD days until he retires.

Not a bad idea.
 
Very sorry for your loss Nords.
Your friend had a tremendous career of service, and I suspect this was a very large part of his passion for life.
He departed this earth far too early and with a bucket list showing more to do, but when I think about it, those who are most engaged with life always leave us before they should, no matter the age.
 
Let me add my condolences, and, if I may, let me [-]wane[/-] wax philosophical...

Earlier this year a good friend ended his own life. He was a happy-go-lucky sort, and I wonder if anti-depressants and/or sleeping pills prescribed to him after a divorce might have colored his outlook. Very shocking, as it seemed so unlike him. I had just spoken to him the week before...

I was pretty torn up for a week or two, but basically grew fatigued with feeling that way, and decided enough was enough, much like after 9/11. It was finally time to stop obsessing. Felt that way after my mom passed, as well.

Guess we're all getting to that stage in life. As a younger man, of course there were deaths, usually two generations removed from me, with the occasional younger person dying in an auto accident, or rare medical condition. Of course, now many of the people of my parents' generation are gone; I think my dad is one of maybe two or three left from his high school class. Coming from a small town, I knew many of them, and some were parents of my friends.

It's now becoming "our" turn. I can think of maybe six or seven from my class that have passed, including one last year, from diabetes-related problems. I'm not being overly morbid about it, but it does give one pause to look at the obits, and see people my age (57) and younger start to succumb to diseases of "old age", like heart disease or diabetes. Optimistically, I have maybe 30 years left, although it could be much shorter. Unfortunately, I still NEED to work, as opposed to "one more year", but I'm approaching the point where that decision is related to "how much more do I need", versus "I still have a bucket list", and I ain't getting any younger...

I've had a pretty good life, so can't complain too much. All we can hope for is to live it our way, as much as practical, knowing the grim reaper could be miles away, or right outside the door. Perhaps, if you could "talk" to your friend, he might not have many regrets. Let's hope so.
 
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