LBYM in ER

[travelover]

.......... I have never flown first class oversea. I have flown first class domestically couple of time from cheap upgrade but I would like to flow first class to Thailand or Philippines if I have surplus during my ER............

I agree, that if there is one thing I'd like to splurge on it is first class airfare, especially on long flights. I look at those magazine ads of those cozy bed seats and dream.

 

[Khan]

I have been giving away a lot of stuff & cash. I'm working on the 'die broke' future.

 

[Major Tom]

I like to count my money, and checking its growth with Quicken is fun too. Call me Scrooge.

Scrooge

 

[NW-Bound]

Hey, thanks! I pride myself on being honest to myself, and also hate to be a hypocrite.

 

[Major Tom]

Hey, thanks! I pride myself on being honest to myself, and also hate to be a hypocrite.

I also strive to be honest with myself and in that spirit, I admit that I sometimes come very close to being one of those folk who know the price of everything and the value of nothing - but I don't quite go over that line.

 

[W2R]

I like to count my money, and checking its growth with Quicken is fun too. Call me Scrooge.

NW-Bound, I am the same way too. I think it is because I was so poor at one time in my life. When I am counting it, I'm thinking, "Yep! Whew! It is all there again this morning, thank heavens. Praise heaven, I'm still not poor today."

Counting money and checking its growth can be very reassuring.

 

[NW-Bound]

I enjoyed reading books by Andrew Tobias, who prides himself on being frugal, but not cheap. I have mentioned this before, but this is worth repeating. Tobias gave the following examples. Not giving a waiter his deserved tip is cheap. Not buying the expensive stuff in a hotel minibar is frugal, not cheap. When going out for lunch with friends and paying with a single bill, not putting in what's fair for one's share is cheap, not frugal. Not going to a posh restaurant is frugal, not cheap.

I was just half-joking about calling myself Scroogey. Generally, frugal is how one treats himself, not towards others. I never short change anyone, and am fairly generous with my kids, relatives, and friends.

At this point in life, I have enough to live comfortably, and in fact have more than most people in the US, a rich country in the world. I am grateful for my fortune, that I have a chance to work to get it. And I do have enough. A fancy car would not bring me that much pleasure, hence I do not covet one. In fact, an expensive car may just cause me some anguish if some idiots scrape it or ding its doors in a parking lot. I get much more enjoyment out of driving my generic motor home into the boondocks.

 

[GregLee]

I have mentioned this before, but this is worth repeating. Tobias gave the following examples. Not giving a waiter his deserved tip is cheap.

When you describe the tip as "deserved", this assumes you owe him the tip. So he "deserves" it. It might at first seem like an ethical statement, but really, it's just playing semantic games.

 

[NW-Bound]

In the US, waiters' wages are so low because it is a tradition that a big part of their compensation comes from tips. In Europe or elsewhere, it is not true. So, if a waiter or waitress in the US does his/her job, I do feel I "owe" him or her a tip.

 

[veremchuka]

.....Not giving a waiter his deserved tip is cheap. Not buying the expensive stuff in a hotel minibar is frugal, not cheap. When going out for lunch with friends and paying with a single bill, not putting in what's fair for one's share is cheap, not frugal. Not going to a posh restaurant is frugal, not cheap....A fancy car would not bring me that much pleasure, hence I do not covet one. In fact, an expensive car may just cause me some anguish if some idiots scrape it or ding its doors in a parking lot....

+1

 

[haha]

In the US, waiters' wages are so low because it is a tradition that a big part of their compensation comes from tips. In Europe or elsewhere, it is not true. So, if a waiter or waitress in the US does his/her job, I do feel I "owe" him or her a tip.

Owed or not, the easiest way to improve your experience of going out if you return to the same places frequently is to be a good tipper. I could always eat and drink cheaper at home; so if I go out it is to enjoy an experience. Adding 20-25% to the check, and also not being a schmuck is a guaranteed way to have more fun.

I still laugh about a time when I was about 22 I took a real sweet Greek-American woman to a downtown white tablecloth restaurant in Boston. We had a great time, the food and service were good and fun, and when the check came, I was laboriously trying to work out what might be exactly 15%. She leans in close, takes me by the arm, and whispers-"Aw honey, be a sport!" OK my dear, I hear you! Sport I'll be!

LBYM is cool; but if I can't afford to be stand-up when I go out, I stay home.

Ha

 

[Sandhog]

LBYM is cool; but if I can't afford to be stand-up when I go out, I stay home.

Ha

Can I use your quote as my signature? It's definitely words to live by during my ER.

I always been a great tipper since I know what it's like to live on tips. Sometime when I'm in very good mood, I tip in excess of a bill to upwards of 50% or more. Then end up eating ramen noodles or spaghetti for a week to get back to LBYM. But when I go out, I do enjoy myself as long as I can control my drinking, I normally tip between 20 to 30 percent and don't have to worry about eating at home for rest of the month.

 

[grasshopper]

I am in forced LBYM. Living in a place where there is no place to spend money.

Even a simple meal out in my cattle country town is a stretch for a vegetarian.

 

[Moemg]

In my day to day living I LBYM not because I have to but because I have been doing it for so long . I do spend more freely while traveling because some of these places you may never see again so do it right .

 

[Danmar]

Not sure why his post morphed into one on tipping, there have been plenty of these and opinions are split. Ha totally agree with you. We are big tippers. Had a nice lunch a couple of days ago here in Scottsdale. We sensed the waitress was struggling a bit but service was still great. We gave her a $20 cash tip on a $45 bill. She almost started to cry- said this had made her day. Felt really good.

 

[NW-Bound]

If the market keeps going down like today, I will be living right at my means.

One can never be sure what his means are, particularly in ER.

 

[Major Tom]

Hey NW-Bound - I purposely wasn't checking the market this morning, as I was still in my early morning happily-waking-up-drinking-coffee-and-taking-it-slowly-routine. You woke me up fully with that revelation!

I agree wholeheartedly with the Andrew Tobias quotes on the difference between frugality and cheapness. I've quoted this before, but someone on these forums some months ago said that she knew she was taking LBYM too far when her "soul felt pinched".

 

[NW-Bound]

I agree wholeheartedly with the Andrew Tobias quotes on the difference between frugality and cheapness. I've quoted this before, but someone on these forums some months ago said that she knew she was taking LBYM too far when her "soul felt pinched".

Yes, I also remember that post, but my memory is failing me about the poster. It was either Khan or Moemg. I did a search but the post did not show up.

Nah! I gave enough money away over the years, so feel no pinching in my soul. Just because I do not get myself a BMW or a Lexus does not mean that I pinch my soul.

Hey NW-Bound - I purposely wasn't checking the market this morning, as I was still in my early morning happily-waking-up-drinking-coffee-and-taking-it-slowly-routine. You woke me up fully with that revelation!

Better get that motor home now, when your money is still worth something.

The blog by Glenn, the traveling musician, will show you how he never paid to park his motor home. Most importantly, same as Andy Baird, he outgrew his smaller first motor home and had to get a bigger one. In both cases, they cut their teeth on a cheap older motor home first, so it was not a waste.

 

[Major Tom]

Better get that motor home now, when your money is still worth something.

The blog by Glenn, the traveling musician, will show you how he never paid to park his motor home. Most importantly, same as Andy Baird, he outgrew his smaller first motor home and had to get a bigger one. In both cases, they cut their teeth on a cheap older motor home first, so it was not a waste.

I'm keeping 3 years worth of living expenses in cash, and a small amount on top of that to cover the purchase of a small used RV if I find something I like. That way, I can let the market do what it wants without it bothering me too much, as I enter this ESR phase of my life.

Boondocking will be pretty much the only way I'll be able to afford to full-time, though I notice that Andy stays in NM parks for an average cost of under $5/night including the cost of his annual membership. I can afford that - just not the $25 or $20 a night that some parks charge. Besides, boon-docking appeals on many levels, aside from the financial one.

Better not get ahead of myself though. They say that effective blogging consists of talking about what you've done rather than what you plan to do and similarly, I don't want to spend too much time soliloquizing about RV'ing here just in case my plans don't materialize!

 

[Nords]

Better not get ahead of myself though. They say that effective blogging consists of talking about what you've done rather than what you plan to do and similarly, I don't want to spend too much time soliloquizing about RV'ing here just in case my plans don't materialize!

Once you tell a few thousand Internet strangers what you plan to do, you're gonna have to follow through and do it...

 

[Moemg]

Yes, I also remember that post, but my memory is failing me about the poster. It was either Khan or Moemg. I did a search but the post did not show up.

.

Usually your memory is great but not on this one .
It was definitely not me . I am usually frugal but never cheap and sometimes very very generous ! I do remember that it was posted by one of our regular females but it was not me or Khan .

 

[JOHNNIE36]

Not sure why his post morphed into one on tipping, there have been plenty of these and opinions are split. Ha totally agree with you. We are big tippers. Had a nice lunch a couple of days ago here in Scottsdale. We sensed the waitress was struggling a bit but service was still great. We gave her a $20 cash tip on a $45 bill. She almost started to cry- said this had made her day. Felt really good.

That is wonderful! It put an idea into my head to do the same thing the next time I see a waiter or waitress who might be up against it. How do you tell? Maybe by their age, the look on their face or conversation. Actually we generally go 20% but many times this isn't enough and I can tell by the check total. We stick to 20% regardless, but your post changed my thinking. Thanks for the "tip"!

 

[REWahoo]

Boondocking will be pretty much the only way I'll be able to afford to full-time, though I notice that Andy stays in NM parks for an average cost of under $5/night including the cost of his annual membership. I can afford that - just not the $25 or $20 a night that some parks charge. Besides, boon-docking appeals on many levels, aside from the financial one.

MT, are you may aware that there are alternatives between the two costs you mention above? Many privately and some publicly owned parks in the southern US offer very affordable monthly rates, usually catering to snowbirds. Most, but not all, charge you separately for electricity and may limit how many months you can stay. Here are a couple of examples:

$395/mo including electricity (available Sept 1 - March 31 only)
$275/mo plus electricity (includes cable tv and wireless internet)

While these two are in "touristy" areas, you can get an even better deal if you're willing/prefer living out in the sticks:

$200/mo plus electricity (includes all the quiet you can stand)

 

[JOHNNIE36]

Now, back to the subject. DW and I have always been frugal in days past. Now that we are 23 years into retirement we are starting to relax and live a little. I'm 75 and DW is 73. I am of the old school and still watch how much I spend. In that respect, I am a creature of habit. My Mother ruled the roost when it came to the money and I guess I learned from her. Like I said, we've opened (the purse strings) a little. Wonder if anyone else feels like this? After seeing how our kids handle money, and how they can pi$$ it away, why should we concern ourselves. They will always have a good income and retirement. Overall our thinking has changed, especially DW's. She never had much as a child and is really enjoying our current position. You've seen the bumper signs "WE'RE SPENDING OUR CHILDRENS INHERITANCE". Well, that's where we are.

 

[omni550]

While we're on the subject of tipping....

Disclaimer: I've never had a job where I worked for tips, so this is speculation. Perhaps someone can confirm it for me.

It occurred to me that a waitperson at a low-cost (diner, family restaurant, etc.) restaurant is going to have to work a lot more tables (and probably a lot harder, too) to make $100 in tips, as compared to someone at a high-end restaurant.

Also, from what I've observed, a lot of the ladies (they always seem to be ladies for some odd reason) at the low-cost restaurants just seem to be 'down on their luck' a bit more that the servers I've seen at the mid-priced and high-end restaurants. Therefore, I always try to tip them close to 50%, which isn't all that much as the food is relatively inexpensive.

omni