Managing Marriage for the Long Term

[HFWR]

Been there, done that, lost my t-shirt...

 

[brett]

Any arrangement can work if both parties are in favour of it.

I consider myself one of life's luckiest. Excellent heath, great parents (deceased) and great spouse of 40 plus years. Maybe it is because we were opposites in all things. She married outside her faith, opposite views on most social and political issues. Not as much now but we do appreciate the differences and foster rather than stifle them. Most of her naysayer relatives have gone through divorce. They probably wonder why we flourish. So do I sometimes.

 

[Fedup]

Opposites work for my marriage too. My family and his were banking on a starter marriage. You never know in life.


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[RetireAge50]

I do not want to be a manager, sounds like work. Much rather just goof around and have fun together.

 

[2017ish]

DW's sister and her hub have essentially lived apart for 5-7 years; he works in San Fran metro (and has had extensive pacific travel at times), while she continued to live in midwestern city until kids finished HS (which recently happened, but she still is there). They videochat most nights and see each other at least every other weekend. Relationship seems strong--subject to the caveat that no outsider ever truly knows!

We were apart a lot in our first 8 years, until I took long hiatus from full-time practice. Particularly for first four years after school, we really saw little of each other between her residency and my weeks long business travel. Worked well for us; kept us in the honeymoon phase for years!

Now, however, we greatly prefer having dinner together every night, even if it is just something quick in the hour before going to bed.

 

[brett]

I worked long hours and travelled a fair amount. DW managed the home front. Worked for us.

Now we travel together.

 

[Sunset]

So if I haven't seen my girlfriends for 15 years, are we still dating ?
DW is pretty interested in knowing now..

 

[Teacher Terry]

I had a friend whose parents used to both go to Palm Springs during the winter but after many years the wife no longer wanted to go. So the husband went alone and it worked fine for them. Fortunately my DH and I want the same things in retirement. I can relate staying in a marriage when you know it is over though. I stayed 22 years in one and did not leave until our youngest graduated HS. As adults my kids appreciated it.