Mr. Money Mustache Divorce Blog Post

[flintnational]

I guess it works both ways...some women fall for the "bad boys" because many sincere men are not exciting enough?

Uh oh! I think I qualify as a "bad boy". I have a fairly aggressive stock allocation! I even mix it up with Emerging Market stocks.

 

[pj.mask]

Lastly, what you refer to as a cynical view, is what I call being aware of reality. W

I think I’m beginning to understand some of the comments posted.

 

[ivinsfan]

The thread evidently touched a fiery pain nerve in some. Perhaps the posters feel a little better after letting off steam.

There is so much steam in this thread the house is burning down. Did you know that outright misogyny is not against forum rules? I found that out a long time ago. But we do have the ignore button.

 

[JustCurious]

Hopefully this explains to you why men are refusing to marry, as opposed to a couple generations ago, when it made sense to marry.

What was different a couple generations ago?

 

[Amethyst]

See, you "get it" (I think)

What I find funny is that this forum has many posters who are quite disdainful of people who've made "bad" financial choices, even though we all know how unpredictable finance can be.

Yet, some of them cannot see the analogy with choosing a mate. When that goes wrong, it was all the mate's fault. Some even accuse an entire sex of wicked plotting and general worthlessness.

Why not reflect on one's own possible lack of due diligence, perhaps a tendency to fall for unrealistic promises and surface appeal? Isn't it a lot like spending carelessly on things of temporary value and investing without a plan, only to find yoursel working till 75?

Notice that I have avoided gendered wording.

Uh oh! I think I qualify as a "bad boy". I have a fairly aggressive stock allocation! I even mix it up with Emerging Market stocks.

 

[street]

You mention I quote stats. Accurate and very telling stats.

You mention it's "sad" and you "feel" sorry.

I think I got it. Nothing else needed to say about that.

On another note, about the royal part. I know you're not talking to me, as I wasn't married, divorced, or have paid a fortune to a woman. But as far as what type of women men are picking, its just a sampling of women in the US in general.

You mentioned the word relationships. I'm fine with relationships. Just never get married, if you're a male.

Lastly, what you refer to as a cynical view, is what I call being aware of reality. When a man gets married, he enters a contract, where he no longer controls his future with a 100% guarantee. At any time, a wife can file, and a judge with a black robe will decree what amount he must pay and for how long. And if he doesn't comply? Incarceration.

Hopefully this explains to you why men are refusing to marry, as opposed to a couple generations ago, when it made sense to marry.

I get what you are saying. Times have changed I also couples don't try as hard these days to make things work. IMO

 

[Olbidness]

Thankfully I have aged out of the system. With a declining libido the utility of a woman decreases daily. My need for companionship would be better served by a dog. At least it would be a living being that loves unconditionally and doesn't judge or shame me. In the words of my fictional hero. The Dude abides.

 

[Carpediem]

Uh oh....."Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos is getting a divorce after 25 years of marriage". Wonder if he'll pay alimony.

 

[tulak]

Uh oh....."Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos is getting a divorce after 25 years of marriage". Wonder if he'll pay alimony.

Hmm....MacKenzie is only a couple years older than me. I wonder how long before she’s on match?

I’d even pass on the prenup!

But more seriously, it looks like Bezos may not be the world’s richest person soon.

 

[street]

^ not sure how he pays but I bet he pays out the nose. LOL

 

[pj.mask]

You know your marriage is bad when you try to go to Mars to get away from your SO!

 

[Amethyst]

It's hard to see how any woman stayed around long enough to waste time judging and shaming you, once she realized that to you, she was a "utility." Anyway, glad to hear your utility bills are going down; helps with LYBM!

Thankfully I have aged out of the system. With a declining libido the utility of a woman decreases daily. My need for companionship would be better served by a dog. At least it would be a living being that loves unconditionally and doesn't judge or shame me. In the words of my fictional hero. The Dude abides.

 

[pj.mask]

See, you "get it" (I think)



What I find funny is that this forum has many posters who are quite disdainful of people who've made "bad" financial choices, even though we all know how unpredictable finance can be.



Yet, some of them cannot see the analogy with choosing a mate. When that goes wrong, it was all the mate's fault. Some even accuse an entire sex of wicked plotting and general worthlessness.



Why not reflect on one's own possible lack of due diligence, perhaps a tendency to fall for unrealistic promises and surface appeal? Isn't it a lot like spending carelessly on things of temporary value and investing without a plan, only to find yoursel working till 75?



Notice that I have avoided gendered wording.

100% agree. I know lots of people who jumped into marriage or settled because the biological clock was ticking. Many are later surprised by the way their spouse acts...

One thing that was critical for me before marriage was: even if we divorce would I respect my SO’s decisions and think they were a good person, role model, and parent to my kids?

Lots of people just consider if they are having fun together now but don’t prioritize how well future goals align.

There is always probability of significant personality shift or mental illness - but I consider that the same as buying insurance. It doesn’t happen to most people but if you commit to a marriage you are agreeing to be there for each other through good or bad. I’d love to hit 95 and get a refund on all my life insurance premiums and blame others deaths on their bad decisions... but insurance and marriage spread the risk. You should realize that going in. If you don’t want to be responsible for anyone but yourself you have the choice to not marry or have kids but I wouldn’t expect any decision made by a minority of people (minimize relationships) to get widespread agreement.

 

[MikeD]

40% of the total births in the nation sounds like plenty of women to me.

I have 2 children and avoided marriage. And child support. Thats why I'm wealthy.

I've been married to a nice person for over 42 years and we have no children. That's why we're wealthy.

 

[Olbidness]

It's hard to see how any woman stayed around long enough to waste time judging and shaming you, once she realized that to you, she was a "utility." Anyway, glad to hear your utility bills are going down; helps with LYBM!

The list is longer than I care to admit. Thanks for the good vibes.

 

[Bestwifeever]

You mention I quote stats. Accurate and very telling stats.

....

I wasn't married, divorced, or have paid a fortune to a woman.....

I'm impressed how you stay current with depressing marriage statististics considering you've never been part of that situation. Perhaps a new hobby might take your mind off them?

Re the MMMs and the Bezoses--who knows, who cares. Pretty sure all parties will be just fine in terms of money. I like the Bezoses' statement that if they'd known they would separate after 25 years, they would do it all again.

 

[Mr. Tightwad]

I'm impressed how you stay current with depressing marriage statististics considering you've never been part of that situation. Perhaps a new hobby might take your mind off them?

Re the MMMs and the Bezoses--who knows, who cares. Pretty sure all parties will be just fine in terms of money. I like the Bezoses' statement that if they'd known they would separate after 25 years, they would do it all again.

I believe a lot of women want men not to focus on paying alimony, seeing their kids 4 days a month, fear of losing your job which results in incarceration due to non payment, etc.

If I had a new hobby, I might not be able to make men aware of the dangers of marriage.

What I'm getting from your post is, "don't pay attention to the financial devastation of getting divorced men, just think about something else".

I prefer to be informed of what occurs in the world.

 

[dvalley]

I see some ladies are trying really hard to employ the public-shaming tactic on men who are simply pointing out facts (even backed by several studies and links previously provided). Not surprising it goes with the emasculation theme of today's feminist agenda and the #metoo stuff.

 

[ivinsfan]

I see some ladies are trying really hard to employ the public-shaming tactic on men who are simply pointing out facts (even backed by several studies and links previously provided). Not surprising it goes with the emasculation theme of today's feminazi agenda and the #metoo stuff.

I think we've followed you far enough down this rabbit hole.

 

[dvalley]

I think we've followed you far enough down this rabbit hole.

Glad you followed me...hope I provided you with a better perspective to see things from

 

[ugeauxgirl]

So to summarize, you (apparently) had a job and he didn't, and you brought more assets to the marriage. Yet you didn't have to pay alimony.

It must be nice to have family court and the divorce process treat you so well.

I'm sure the men who have posted in this thread wish they could be so lucky.

You have the best post in this thread. It illustrates how the court treats men vs. how women are treated. I hope everyone is paying attention.

Will you admit you were treated better than aja, dvalley, and all the others?

The reason I didn't have to pay alimony is because we'd missed the 5 year mark of being married by a few days- 5 years is how long you had to be married to be eligible for alimony in this state. Lest you attribute this to female greed, it was just a happy coincidence that I filed when I did. He got half of "my" assets including my retirement plan which I had been contributing to, and he had not. I also got to pay for half of his credit card debt (didn't even know he had any) including some expensive toys he bought himself after he moved out. I got treated just like a man.

My current husband (of 17 years) is a prince, and this year I'm cooking healthier and trying to get him to exercise with me because he isn't replaceable and I want him with me as long as I can manage.

As Mark Twain said "We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it and stop there lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove lid again and that is well but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore."

 

[ivinsfan]

The reason I didn't have to pay alimony is because we'd missed the 5 year mark of being married by a few days- 5 years is how long you had to be married to be eligible for alimony in this state. Lest you attribute this to female greed, it was just a happy coincidence that I filed when I did. He got half of "my" assets including my retirement plan which I had been contributing to, and he had not. I also got to pay for half of his credit card debt (didn't even know he had any) including some expensive toys he bought himself after he moved out. I got treated just like a man.

My current husband is a prince, and this year I'm cooking healthier and trying to get him to exercise with me because he isn't replaceable and I want him with me as long as I can manage.

As Mark Twain said "We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it and stop there lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove lid. She will never sit down on a hot stove lid again and that is well but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore."

JMHO but I'd quit engaging with this poster and stop explaining things he has no right to know. because nothing is going to change his opinion.

 

[Mr. Tightwad]

See, you "get it" (I think)

What I find funny is that this forum has many posters who are quite disdainful of people who've made "bad" financial choices, even though we all know how unpredictable finance can be.

Yet, some of them cannot see the analogy with choosing a mate. When that goes wrong, it was all the mate's fault. Some even accuse an entire sex of wicked plotting and general worthlessness.

Why not reflect on one's own possible lack of due diligence, perhaps a tendency to fall for unrealistic promises and surface appeal? Isn't it a lot like spending carelessly on things of temporary value and investing without a plan, only to find yoursel working till 75?

Notice that I have avoided gendered wording.

I admit all of your gender is not plotting and worthless. I've read your posts for a long time. You and people like Teacher Terry give every indication you are amongst the sweetest on the planet. But you two are not typical.

What I would like is if you were aware that your kind nature is not shared by ALL women. There are those that are like you ( I'm sure Aja and Dvalley thought they found someone like you, but obviously didn't ) and plenty that aren't like you.

Yes, the bad apples have ruined the barrel. And that's why the marriage rate is plummeting.

 

[MikeD]

feminazi

Whilst you did not directly call anyone here a name, I think your comment seems to cross a line of being respectful in general.

One does not have to respect another person's views. Please let me suggest sticking to the use of damning and true statistics, as they seem to make points more effectively.

Thanks,
Mike D.

 

[dvalley]

Thankfully I have aged out of the system. With a declining libido the utility of a woman decreases daily. My need for companionship would be better served by a dog. At least it would be a living being that loves unconditionally and doesn't judge or shame me. In the words of my fictional hero. The Dude abides.

It's funny we can be 'utility' and mules as 'protectors/providers' and that's perfectly acceptable but dare not say the same about women or you'll be castrated in public.

I'm glad to hear the libido decreases over time because if it wasn't for that I'd have just gotten a dog a long time ago. Although my current gf is super sweet and great...I know it's only a matter of time when she'll turn.