Hey, he did give up the Leaf. No credit for that one?
I'm no MMM fanboy, but sometimes life happens and it sounds like he's managing it as well as can be expected. Kudos to him.
I appreciate his perspective. For somebody who is going through this, it's always interesting to read about people going through the same process and how they are handling it.
Much like how it's helpful to read about how others handle their finances, right?
This guy writes about how he screwed up and blew his marriage and then GIVES ADVICE on HOW TO STAY MARRIED? What a jerk!
That was my initial take, but I quickly changed my opinion. Going through a divorce provides an opportunity for self-reflection and thinking about what went wrong. That's a good thing. His comments around this are sound and also telling if you read between the lines.
If you don't see it, that's fine. As I said, his article resonates with me because the patterns he points out in a declining relationship are common and amazingly obvious after the fact.
Put me in the unimpressed category with his response. He managed to write a long post but not even touch on the main reason I and some other wanted him to discuss his divorce at all, did his FIRE habits contribute to his divorce.
Yes obviously having money makes lessens the financial impact divorce. Generally, speaking having $ cushions the difficulties of dealing with most things. "Life is a like a crap sandwich the more dough you have the easier it is to swallow"
But I what I think he owed his followers is an answer to this question. Did either his instance of LYBM style when they really didn't need to it anymore or simply too much togetherness contribute to the divorce?
So? Sure, lets assume his LBYM lifestyle contributed to his divorce. Does it matter? Or that they spent too much time together?
That's just noise. I'm sure there are a lot of reasons his relationship didn't work out, LBYM, being a blog celebrity, etc, may have been a factor. More likely is that his spouse and him were on a different page for lots of reasons and drifted apart. People change. It happens.
What's more interesting is minimizing the impact of a divorce, which he touches on:
But fortunately, like everything else, going to war is almost always a choice.
And if you don’t choose to fight, a divorce doesn’t have to cost much at all. Two people can peacefully collect up their financial and physical belongings and go their separate ways, and the only cost is in any duplication of possessions you choose to do, to replace things you formerly shared.
That alone is worth the price of the article.
No divorce is easy, but it's best to stay positive. Again, MMM said it well:
We can get right back to work on positive things to rebuild our lives. Improving ourselves through better habits and health. Building new relationships and nurturing old ones, and making sure we put out only positive energy to every person in our lives, including our ex-spouse. Building everyone up and never, ever tearing anyone down. Because they already do that plenty to themselves.
Personally, I wish him all the best.
