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My BS bucket is too heavy
Old 10-29-2013, 05:54 PM   #1
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My BS bucket is too heavy

I've been reading stories about how people cope with the last few months before ER. I really admire the folks who can overlook the BS, find the humor in the office stupidity, and trully 'suffer fools gladly'. I'm not that good. My BS bucket has been awfully heavy ever since the big house was sold and we are now in our (mortgage free) retirement home.

Will I make to March 2015 ? Its gonna be a lonnnnnnnnnnnnnnng sloooooooooooooow ride .....
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Old 10-29-2013, 06:04 PM   #2
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I really admire the folks who can overlook the BS, find the humor in the office stupidity, and trully 'suffer fools gladly'.
There's a trick to that, ya just gotta stop caring. And know that when you leave...
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Old 10-30-2013, 11:11 AM   #3
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I am able to ER precisely because I have always cared which resulted in me excelling in my position, leading to good pay and ability to save.

I'd love to stop caring. It's a hard habit to break.

(PS: love Sonny and Cher ! reminds me of having dinner at Grandma's house where we watched that show during dessert).
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Hebrews 12:11

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Old 10-30-2013, 11:35 AM   #4
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I'd love to stop caring. It's a hard habit to break.
It's amazing how quickly you'll stop caring about work once you are gone.
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Old 10-30-2013, 12:29 PM   #5
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I can sympathize. I got as far as I did because I cared and always tried to make a difference. Problem is that the mega-corp doesn't usually have the same care for you as you (perhaps in your case and perhaps mine) had for it. I know in my case, the organization has gone downhill since I left. They replaced me with a guy who cares pretty much only for himself, and it is all too obvious to the staff. Now that I'm gone, I'd like to say I no longer care, but the reality is that I do, as I see my own legacy being slowly reduced to ash.

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Old 10-30-2013, 02:24 PM   #6
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I'm certain I won't care once I'm gone, but in the interim I still care about my reputation and my work quality. Its not really about how megacorp see's me, its about how I see me. I need to feel that I am earning my pay.
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Old 10-30-2013, 06:18 PM   #7
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I'm certain I won't care once I'm gone, but in the interim I still care about my reputation and my work quality. Its not really about how megacorp see's me, its about how I see me.
I understand that, and perhaps I came across as too flip.

But there is a line between caring enough to want to do a good job and caring too much so that you start bringing it home with you. It took me a good many years to find that line, but it is there, and different for everyone.

And know that some days all you can do is laugh at the idiocy. Don't forget how to do that.
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Old 10-30-2013, 07:18 PM   #8
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I think what is happening is that at some level you know that you really do have enough to retire right now. So, knowing that it is much, much harder to deal with the BS since you know that you don't really have to deal with the BS. When you know that you need a job to live on and to be able to save enough to retire it is much easier to put up with BS as the alternative (being jobless without enough money saved) is even worse.

But, when you really are FI then tolerating the BS is much, much harder since the alternative is not really worse puttling up with the BS.


Yes, I remember why you decided on TMY Syndrome and the wanting to sleep at night. I recall that basically your numbers put you at FI by any reasonable measure but you wanted cushion beyond that and felt more comfortable deferring your retirement a couple of years. I am not, BTW, saying this to be critical of it. My own numbers say I can fully retire now (DH is already retired) but I still work very part-time more for belt and suspenders than any rational reason. Still, I recognize that my not quitting work is more of an anxiety reduction mechanism than anything else. And, working for anxiety reduction doesn't do much to make the BS bucket worth it.

So one option for you would be might be to question whether the lack of tolerance of BS right now is you really knowing in your heart that you are FI and that you would be happier just going ahead and retiring before the TMY were up.
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Old 10-30-2013, 08:11 PM   #9
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I've been reading stories about how people cope with the last few months before ER. I really admire the folks who can overlook the BS, find the humor in the office stupidity, and trully 'suffer fools gladly'. I'm not that good. My BS bucket has been awfully heavy ever since the big house was sold and we are now in our (mortgage free) retirement home.

Will I make to March 2015 ? Its gonna be a lonnnnnnnnnnnnnnng sloooooooooooooow ride .....
No, really. Friday is November 1. You have, what--5 months? Maybe I'm being completely without empathy here, but why would you care about anything that goes on at work. I have 14 months, and I can't believe how disconnected I am.

Know what I ask myself before I react to anything at work? Is this gonna cause me stress? Based on my answer, I usually do the following: don't show up for meaningless meetings, literally drift out of meetings that get snarky, visit this site on my IPAD during mandatory but useless meetings, delete all emails that annoy me, don't respond at all to anything or anyone that's a pain in the ashtray, go off and go laugh with someone...etc.. As I've said before, soon as I began to consider myself as simply a temp, it all became someone else's problem to me. Funny thing is, I've noticed I'm a hell of a lot more fun at work because I. Just. Don't. Care.

Yes, we did get to where we are--able to FIRE--by being good at our jobs, but given that we're so close to FIRE it means we now have the luxury of not giving any of it a second thought.

Now I'm going to go have that glass of wine and think about my FIRE future
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Old 10-30-2013, 09:24 PM   #10
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No, really. Friday is November 1. You have, what--5 months? Maybe I'm being completely without empathy here, but why would you care about anything that goes on at work. I have 14 months, and I can't believe how disconnected I am.
OP's planned date is March 2015 which is 16 to 17 months from now.
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Old 10-30-2013, 09:37 PM   #11
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I'm certain I won't care once I'm gone, but in the interim I still care about my reputation and my work quality. Its not really about how megacorp see's me, its about how I see me. I need to feel that I am earning my pay.
A most honorable and upstanding approach, indeed. But I doubt that earning your pay includes worrying about the ineptitude with which megacorp handles its problems outside your control. Megacorp has no right to send stress/guilt home with you. I would focus on accomplishing my personal projects to best of my ability..... & planning for life after March 2015. Sounds to me like you will have well-earned that coming retirement!
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Old 10-30-2013, 09:50 PM   #12
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I am struggling bog time with the slog through waist high BS as I approach the finish line. I won't compromise the quality of work that is actually important, but anything that is fluff (and there is a metric assload of it) gets short shrift. I am also making full use of vacation and sick days. Find a way to unplug and it really helps. I took today off to go chase deer (and other critters). The cell phone was off all day and I probabluy hiked at least 10 miles with pack and bangstick. I came face to face with a beautiful buck, but I have a doe-only tag. Could have been frustrating, but really I was almost pitifully grateful to be outside, away from the crap, and watching a beautiful creature bound away into the woods.
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Old 10-30-2013, 11:05 PM   #13
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I've been reading stories about how people cope with the last few months before ER. I really admire the folks who can overlook the BS, find the humor in the office stupidity, and trully 'suffer fools gladly'. I'm not that good. My BS bucket has been awfully heavy ever since the big house was sold and we are now in our (mortgage free) retirement home.

Will I make to March 2015 ? Its gonna be a lonnnnnnnnnnnnnnng sloooooooooooooow ride .....
I found it surprisingly easy (possibly because, while my w$rking environment came with all the irritations that are common to just about all j*bs, it was actually a good place with good colleagues and very good income). Once I reached FI, while I still cared about my performance I found things just didn't bother me the way they used to.

Try drawing up a list of milestones and think about each one as they draw nearer. Here are some of mine:
  1. last office Christmas party to avoid
  2. last self assesment to fabricate
  3. last assesment of colleagues
  4. last annual collections push
  5. telling close colleagues of my imminent departure
  6. officially resigning
  7. stepping down from various management roles
  8. last office spring dinner
  9. last month
  10. last week
  11. last day
  12. last pay cheque (the only one I wasn't looking forward to)
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Old 10-30-2013, 11:12 PM   #14
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Just about done, well done. Last week, they finally decided to Action Plan me at work. You know, begin the formal documentation process to rid themselves of my so-called worthless self. The first one of these I've received in 30 years of my so-called working career. That is, after completely burning me out with massive hours, workload, unreasonable deadlines, stressful projects, just a few extra small jobs, etc. We're double the output with 1/2 the staff in 4 years and two acquisitions. I reached the end of my rope and had the unmitigated gall to stand up to overlords and call them out on their irrational behaviors. This can not be tolerated, any resistance to the dark ones, so one fabrication after another was developed and deployed. I cared too much, I must either submit or die. I'm now trying to figure out my next steps and only have a few days to do so. Its so depressing and sad, since I had less than 20 months to go to 100% FIRE. As you might imagine, my health, mental and emotional state are in a complete shamble. And I'm burning in sadness and ......... What to do?
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Old 10-30-2013, 11:25 PM   #15
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Just about done, well done. Last week, they finally decided to Action Plan me at work. You know, begin the formal documentation process to rid themselves of my so-called worthless self. The first one of these I've received in 30 years of my so-called working career. That is, after completely burning me out with massive hours, workload, unreasonable deadlines, stressful projects, just a few extra small jobs, etc. We're double the output with 1/2 the staff in 4 years and two acquisitions. I reached the end of my rope and had the unmitigated gall to stand up to overlords and call them out on their irrational behaviors. This can not be tolerated, any resistance to the dark ones, so one fabrication after another was developed and deployed. I cared too much, I must either submit or die. I'm now trying to figure out my next steps and only have a few days to do so. Its so depressing and sad, since I had less than 20 months to go to 100% FIRE. As you might imagine, my health, mental and emotional state are in a complete shamble. And I'm burning in sadness and ......... What to do?
Well, how close are you? Are there adjustments you can make that can get you to being able to ER?
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Old 10-31-2013, 12:19 AM   #16
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Brewer,
Close......but, being the conservative sort, probably not close enough for me about 83% FIRE at the moment, figuring till age 90 or so. I still feel like I want to work, have some value to add and most of all, I think, don't go riding into the sunset like this. Strangely, I just feel sadness......not pissed, not ashamed, not fear, not even revenge. I've certainly cared way too much........it's a fault of mine, never been able to solve it.

At least the can't send me back to the middle-east. Anything else to add?
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Old 10-31-2013, 01:47 AM   #17
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I am able to ER precisely because I have always cared which resulted in me excelling in my position, leading to good pay and ability to save.

I'd love to stop caring. It's a hard habit to break.

(PS: love Sonny and Cher ! reminds me of having dinner at Grandma's house where we watched that show during dessert).

Hard Habit to Break (Chicago! Let's do more bands, lol!)
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Old 10-31-2013, 02:31 AM   #18
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Just about done, well done. Last week, they finally decided to Action Plan me at work. You know, begin the formal documentation process to rid themselves of my so-called worthless self. The first one of these I've received in 30 years of my so-called working career. That is, after completely burning me out with massive hours, workload, unreasonable deadlines, stressful projects, just a few extra small jobs, etc. We're double the output with 1/2 the staff in 4 years and two acquisitions. I reached the end of my rope and had the unmitigated gall to stand up to overlords and call them out on their irrational behaviors. This can not be tolerated, any resistance to the dark ones, so one fabrication after another was developed and deployed. I cared too much, I must either submit or die. I'm now trying to figure out my next steps and only have a few days to do so. Its so depressing and sad, since I had less than 20 months to go to 100% FIRE. As you might imagine, my health, mental and emotional state are in a complete shamble. And I'm burning in sadness and ......... What to do?
I know it doesn't help you, but I thought I was being Action Planned too last month. I called out my boss on his short comings. I did mis-direct and threw in compensation as an issue. In my case, they decided they want me to redo my job description and take on tasks to make up for his lack of leadership.
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Old 10-31-2013, 02:50 AM   #19
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Sorry about that. Doing this on my phone and I hit a wrong button. To continue.

So now I have another project they want done that they don't realize is meaningless. The compensation angle did deflect their ire, so you might see if you can throw it in.

To top things off, a coworker is transferring to another division and and my boss wants me to do the job description, hiring and training of the replacement mainly because after being here for 1.5 years, he knows nothing about my coworker's duties. I think it will come as a shock when he finds out he'll have two to train that he knows absolutely nothing.
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Old 10-31-2013, 10:29 AM   #20
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By getting laid off unexpectedly as I did, I was "deprived" of knowing how I would take knowing I'd be a short-timer. I always figured I'd mellow out some and not stress much because I wouldn't care as much, but I'll never know. In reality, when I was told I was being laid off, about 90% of my emotion was happiness and relief. The other 10% was worry and dread. Of that latter 10%, about 2% was actual financial worry and the other 8% was in telling my wife, though the severance made that easier.

But it was, shall we say, a rather instant purging of the overflowing BS bucket.
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