Join Early Retirement Today
Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 04-12-2019, 05:54 PM   #41
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Cut-Throat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 1,043
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bestwifeever View Post
My link was actually to a story about what first appeared to be a murder-suicide of a wealthy Canadian couple being found to be a murder-murder, so it wasn’t suicide at all. Just thought some might find that interesting—I guess not.

Current Scenario
__________________

Cut-Throat is online now   Reply With Quote
Join the #1 Early Retirement and Financial Independence Forum Today - It's Totally Free!

Are you planning to be financially independent as early as possible so you can live life on your own terms? Discuss successful investing strategies, asset allocation models, tax strategies and other related topics in our online forum community. Our members range from young folks just starting their journey to financial independence, military retirees and even multimillionaires. No matter where you fit in you'll find that Early-Retirement.org is a great community to join. Best of all it's totally FREE!

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest so you have limited access to our community. Please take the time to register and you will gain a lot of great new features including; the ability to participate in discussions, network with our members, see fewer ads, upload photographs, create a retirement blog, send private messages and so much, much more!

Old 04-12-2019, 06:41 PM   #42
Full time employment: Posting here.
Scrapr's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Bend
Posts: 861
Quote:
Originally Posted by RetMD21 View Post
Sorry to hear about the situation, Scrapr. I have been impressed with hospice care. Perhaps it could be a consideration?
Thank you. We are well acquainted with hospice care. 3 times in a year & a half. Lil brother on hospice now as well. (glioblastoma) Hospice was wonderful with my FIL. We have not ruled anything in or out at this point. We talk with the oncologist Tuesday for a full & frank discussion

If the Irwins death was a murder suicide then that is horrific and heartbreaking that they (he?) felt that was the only option left. The memory care units we have been in are not particularly pleasant but Mom & Dad were treated with respect and as individuals by the staff & admins
__________________

Scrapr is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-12-2019, 06:48 PM   #43
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 182
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cut-Throat View Post
We have figured out how to get our animals out of this world, but we insist on letting humans suffer to the end.
So true. I hope to one day be gently "put to sleep" rather than be forced to suffer. Current end of life care is insane.
__________________
Seems to me that the corporation's race to the top is resulting in a race to the bottom for the employee's quality of life. FIRE can't come soon enough.
kjpliny is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 04-14-2019, 02:39 AM   #44
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
robnplunder's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2013
Location: Bay Area
Posts: 2,480
Quote:
Originally Posted by Scrapr View Post
T
If the Irwins death was a murder suicide then that is horrific and heartbreaking that they (he?) felt that was the only option left. The memory care units we have been in are not particularly pleasant but Mom & Dad were treated with respect and as individuals by the staff & admins
I wonder if he could have used his wealth to have the best 24 x 7 help to lessen the stress of caring for his wife.
__________________
Pura Vida
robnplunder is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-14-2019, 05:57 AM   #45
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Cut-Throat's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 1,043
Quote:
Originally Posted by robnplunder View Post
I wonder if he could have used his wealth to have the best 24 x 7 help to lessen the stress of caring for his wife.



There were probably other factors that we have no way of knowing about. The guy was as smart and savvy as you could be in this world, and for whatever reason, he must have felt that he was backed into a corner with no way out. (Example -- Depression)
Cut-Throat is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 04-14-2019, 09:21 AM   #46
Moderator Emeritus
Bestwifeever's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 17,268
Quote:
Originally Posted by Cut-Throat View Post
Not the Canadian couple. For the Minnesota couple this links to, very sad for the children and grandchildren to live with, forever. Nature will eventually take its course for all of us.
__________________
“Would you like an adventure now, or would you like to have your tea first?” J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan
Bestwifeever is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-14-2019, 09:41 AM   #47
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Dec 2017
Posts: 57
GBM is miserable. I saw hospice use palliative sedation on a family friend with GBM. The distinction between this and euthanasia was pretty subtle. The family was very relieved.
RetMD21 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-14-2019, 01:38 PM   #48
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Jan 2017
Posts: 1,044
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bestwifeever View Post
...For the Minnesota couple this links to, very sad for the children and grandchildren to live with, forever. Nature will eventually take its course for all of us.
I didn't assume that the children and grandchildren involved in the originally posted case would be any sadder than had there been a different outcome. I don't have enough details to know what the alternatives could have been.

Hypothetically, (and I can't possibly know this) a double suicide, or even a euthanasia-suicide, could be the least horrible of all the horrible options.

I do know I'd rather go out in control, and having my family remember me as who I am, than go out as a drooling, pathetic being kept alive as some sort of bizarre trophy to medical science. And I think the former would be far less traumatic to anyone left behind.

Quote:
Originally Posted by RetMD21 View Post
GBM is miserable. I saw hospice use palliative sedation on a family friend with GBM. The distinction between this and euthanasia was pretty subtle. The family was very relieved.
Exactly my point.
CaptTom is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-14-2019, 01:50 PM   #49
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Sunset's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2014
Location: Spending the Kids Inheritance and living in Chicago
Posts: 6,785
Quote:
Originally Posted by 6miths View Post
This may have been 'Ending Well' from their point of view but it is tragic to leave family members behind especially if the caregiver was well and suffering from depression related to their situation.

MAD (Medically Assisted Death) is available in Ontario but there are still very significant limitations on who qualifies - as is, arguably, appropriate.
Yes, but it is amazing to me how long it takes to get all the approvals done, from what I see it takes months. Which royally sucks if a person is in great pain.
Considering it is only getting permission to kill yourself in a pill form, not actually killing the person.
__________________
Fortune favors the prepared mind. ... Louis Pasteur
Sunset is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-14-2019, 02:24 PM   #50
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Rianne's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2017
Location: Champaign
Posts: 1,495
IMHO, it's difficult to judge another's pain. Whether it be depression, physical pain, loss of a loved one (dying of a broken heart is not uncommon), dementia, old age. There are many instances of healthy, young, brilliant people, who act happy and engaged. Who appear to love life. Who live socially and interactive with others. And take their own life. I've read too many articles and news stories like this. I can't possibly have an opinion about another choosing to take their own life, except speaking for myself. MAD is in another category, entirely. It's putting the responsibility on another person.

I remember Dr Jack Kevorkian. I feared and respected him. I wrestled with his role as Dr. Death. I just couldn't decide if he was a devil or an angel or somewhere in between. He certainly started the conversation.
__________________
"If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.
Rianne is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-14-2019, 03:06 PM   #51
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: May 2006
Location: Orlando
Posts: 1,991
Quote:
Originally Posted by Rianne View Post
Article provides more information than most about suicide and wealthy people. Maybe they planned it together? We'll never know.
I often wonder why suicide is viewed as "unstable" or ''can't take it anymore" type of thinking. Could be in so much pain, mentally or physically it's a way out. A venture into the unknown might be better than the known here on earth.


I do tell my DH to "put me down" if I'm no longer healthy and create a burden. What's the big deal? We're all going anyway. I'd rather go my way quick and painless, than suffer.
And to say suicide is sinful or you go to hell if you commit suicide. I don't believe that for one second.
I definitely think about the benefits of 'going easily' with respect to my mothers recent death. A negligent medical error caused her death, cutting her life short by a year or two at the minimum. She was 84.8 years old. The cycle took about a week after their error condemned her to an early death. OTOH, she had COPD and the end stages cannot be good and are most likely drawn out longer than the person would want. Still processing this after 6 months. From anger to deep sadness to being happy she didn't suffer more than she did. I miss her.
Buckeye is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-16-2019, 02:03 PM   #52
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
HFWR's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Lawn chair in Texas
Posts: 13,645
Suicide is illegal; one could end up in jail...
__________________
Have Funds, Will Retire

...not doing anything of true substance...
HFWR is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-16-2019, 05:47 PM   #53
Full time employment: Posting here.
HNL Bill's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2017
Posts: 973
Quote:
Originally Posted by Scrapr View Post
If the Irwins death was a murder suicide then that is horrific and heartbreaking that they (he?) felt that was the only option left. The memory care units we have been in are not particularly pleasant but Mom & Dad were treated with respect and as individuals by the staff & admins
We don't know the particulars...this may have been a joint decision. If it was consentual, I respect them for the choice, and personally, would much rather go that way, then be institutionalized in a memory care unit for even one month. Been there, witnessed what it's like. It's not for the faint of heart. The only up side is that many memory care patients don't know where they are. Some of the facilities put the patients on many drugs to make them non-combative. They become walking zombies, or wheel chair zombies, unable to feed themselves, dress themselves, or walk. Before we judge, go stay with patients in such a place for a day. Of course, late stage dementia's a lot different than early stage.
HNL Bill is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-17-2019, 05:11 AM   #54
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Badger's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2008
Posts: 1,088
Quote:
Originally Posted by HFWR View Post
Suicide is illegal; one could end up in jail...

I never did understand the rationale for anyone who was stopped or survived. And I don't buy into anyone's religious beliefs being forced on me as a reason.


Cheers!
Badger is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-17-2019, 07:12 AM   #55
Full time employment: Posting here.
 
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 600
My mother was in healthcare for most of her life. She instilled in me that she did not want to go through the extreme measures for a few weeks more, while being put through misery. She signed the advance directives for me to make decisions and shopped for a physician that used Hospice well. (I cannot say enough good things about Hospice). She also made sure that everyone knew of her decisions to ensure that there would not be family interference. She knew that I would honor her wishes and entrusted me the powers of attorney, advance directives, et al.

She had a massive stroke that left her in a vegetative state ten years ago. I did as she directed and experienced Hospice for the first time. Living well and going out with grace and dignity was what I saw and what I wish for myself when the time comes.

Talk to family, get the legal requirements taken care of. Be ready. Then live life fully.
devans0 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-17-2019, 08:20 AM   #56
Dryer sheet aficionado
blueskyk's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Hurricane UT
Posts: 38
Quote:
Originally Posted by braumeister View Post
It's possible to set up an advance directive to deal with that possibility.

Advance Care Planning for Alzheimer’s Disease or Dementia
One of my retirement gigs is serving as an End of Life Doula (INELDA trained). My observation over the years is that people who have (and keep updating) advanced directives and regularly talk openly about their wishes in this regard are far more likely to have the kind of death they seek. There are still some difficulties in enforcing such directives in the midst of competing interests (families, facilities, emergency personnel, etc..) but regularly having The Conversation with anyone who will listen bears great benefit.

And, here’s a good place to start...treat yourself to a great beer or glass of wine and discuss your wishes with someone (better is several someone’s)!

Fivewishes.org
blueskyk is offline   Reply With Quote
No matter how Rich -- Our Lives Never End Well...........
Old 04-17-2019, 08:40 AM   #57
Dryer sheet aficionado
blueskyk's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Hurricane UT
Posts: 38
No matter how Rich -- Our Lives Never End Well...........

Quote:
Originally Posted by BlueSky View Post
One of my retirement gigs is serving as an End of Life Doula (INELDA trained). My observation over the years is that people who have (and keep updating) advanced directives and regularly talk openly about their wishes in this regard are far more likely to have the kind of death they seek. There are still some difficulties in enforcing such directives in the midst of competing interests (families, facilities, emergency personnel, etc..) but regularly having The Conversation with anyone who will listen bears great benefit.



And, here’s a good place to start...treat yourself to a great beer or glass of wine and discuss your wishes with someone (better is several someone’s)!



Fivewishes.org


Uh...quoting myself here because I see I somehow have two accounts and this is the one I actually use...and here’s the actual link to Five Wishes https://fivewishes.org

End of Life is such an important topic it seems (to me anyway) that it could warrant its own Forum.
blueskyk is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-17-2019, 09:35 AM   #58
Administrator
Alan's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Eee ba gum
Posts: 23,838
Quote:
Originally Posted by blueskyk View Post
Uh...quoting myself here because I see I somehow have two accounts and this is the one I actually use...and here’s the actual link to Five Wishes https://fivewishes.org

End of Life is such an important topic it seems (to me anyway) that it could warrant its own Forum.
Fixed it for you.
__________________
Retired in Jan, 2010 at 55, moved to England in May 2016
Enough private pension and SS income to cover all needs
Alan is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-17-2019, 09:39 AM   #59
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: Diablo Valley (SF Bay Area)
Posts: 1,458
Quote:
Originally Posted by 6miths View Post
This may have been 'Ending Well' from their point of view but it is tragic to leave family members behind especially if the caregiver was well and suffering from depression related to their situation.

MAD (Medically Assisted Death) is available in Ontario but there are still very significant limitations on who qualifies - as is, arguably, appropriate.
Euthanasia is legal in California, Colorado, Hawaii, New Jersey (in July), Oregon, Vermont, and Washington. It'll come to other states soon


Adding DC
gayl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-17-2019, 09:49 AM   #60
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Nov 2016
Posts: 2,245
Quote:
Originally Posted by gayl View Post
Euthanasia is legal in California, Colorado, Hawaii, New Jersey (in July), Oregon, Vermont, and Washington. It'll come to other states soon

I hope you are right about other states getting on board. I would imagine the cost to keep people alive is a large cost for States.

One question how are Life Insurance Policy's going to be handled, are they going to be granted them, once a person takes their own life??
__________________

street is online now   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Animals we share our lives with Purron Other topics 1526 10-15-2018 09:09 AM
Well [water], well, well...What to do? [LONG] Amethyst Other topics 23 09-21-2016 07:48 AM
Where to Live the Rest of Our Lives? haha Other topics 65 09-20-2011 06:05 PM
How Important IS TV In Our Lives Danny Other topics 29 11-18-2006 10:03 AM

» Quick Links

 
All times are GMT -6. The time now is 08:01 AM.
 
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2019, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.