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reporter's crisis
Old 05-17-2009, 06:54 AM   #41
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reporter's crisis

It seems to me that this fellow also rushed in to a new relationship rather quickly after the demise of his marriage. I would think that most people need a little time to decompress, reflect, think through a new life plan and make his 3 young children aware that they are his primary concern. Regroup, if you will, and not make impetuous decisions in one's middle age when you have less time to recover ground. There is an art to living alone, and it can be very rewarding(this from someone who met her husband at 19 and was married for 26 years). I am not advocating that he not have remarried. Just taken it slower and learned more about each other due to both parties complicated baggage.
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Old 05-17-2009, 07:33 AM   #42
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Good grief those two are jerks. Especially the author -- he practically glories in his schemes. He is worse than his broker. How can anyone possibly have sympathy for people who knowingly do this to themselves and their families? The only positive aspect of the story is that, if there is any justice left in the world, they will get tossed out of their house when the mortgage bureaucrats eventually get around to them. Maybe his editors at the NYT will read the story and fire the guy? No, they will give him a raise. Oh well, if he gets a raise and makes money on his book, he wins the game. As long as he doesn't get some work out that lowers the principal on his mortgage maybe that is justice after all.
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Old 05-17-2009, 09:30 AM   #43
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Some people play by the rules. Others play the system. It's all about where your talents lie. His talents lie, obviously, not in work itself, but in cannily, cynically working the system.

Judge him by the results he has obtained by using cynical methods. He gets what he wants: a wife who can stay home, a beach house for the family (so his ex-wife can't say the kids' lifestyles have gone down), a decent home in an expensive Maryland county. He's even figured out a way to live in his home without paying for it! That takes brains, folks! (And a lack, of course, of scruples or genuine shame).

With his book (how many of us could get a book published? Clearly, he is good at using his connections) he will knowingly play on a reliable flaw in the human race: our vanity. Tell-all books sell for one reason: People love to gloat over someone who admits he made embarrassing mistakes that "They" (the readers) would "never make." He knows many people have a burning desire to feel superior to other people, or at least feel "Hey, I'm not that bad, look what a dope this guy is."

And the biggest price he has ever had to pay is a few hours of angst over the cable bill. What a piece of work.
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Old 05-17-2009, 10:07 AM   #44
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Good observations Amethyst.

Be curious where he'll be in 5 years, and who will take over payments on the high maintenance wife. OTOH maybe it just does not matter. Another blip in the economic chaos.
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Old 05-17-2009, 11:42 AM   #45
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Correction: his wife did work and had an editorial position paying $60K until the recession hit and she was laid off.

This couple seems more typically American upper middle class than the folks on this board. But I'm not criticizing you all. I started hanging out here because I admire the financial sense expressed by the posters here. I was raised to LBYM and I lived that way most of my life, especially as a single mother putting myself through college and graduate school.

But when people remarry sometimes they want everything to be better than in their previous marriage so they go overboard trying to please their new partner. I've not experienced this but have witnessed it. And this author fits the picture. It's too bad that his actions had the exact opposite effect of his intention.
I was married over 30 years ago to a man who had totally different ideas than mine regarding money...his was spend it as fast as it comes in and borrow it if it doesn't...mine was to live modestly and save as much as possible, pay off all loans and live debt free. I am sure that if my ex-husband hadn't left me for greener pastures, it would have been a constant battle to become financially independant. However, this guy really seems to lack financial sense and surely contributed to their money problems. The mortage companies have no excuse for lending to people like this...it is pure greed.
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Old 05-17-2009, 03:09 PM   #46
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This article is good cautionary tale about second marriages.

I agree with the comment that this is a story about personal relationships.

He certainly wasn't honest with himself about planning for the future of this blended family.

Both he and his wife had to sign all those mortage, re-finance, HELOC papers didn't they?

They are both crooks and jerks.
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Old 05-17-2009, 03:18 PM   #47
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I was married over 30 years ago to a man who had totally different ideas than mine regarding money...his was spend it as fast as it comes in and borrow it if it doesn't...mine was to live modestly and save as much as possible, pay off all loans and live debt free. I am sure that if my ex-husband hadn't left me for greener pastures, it would have been a constant battle to become financially independant. However, this guy really seems to lack financial sense and surely contributed to their money problems. The mortage companies have no excuse for lending to people like this...it is pure greed.
Not having ever been married - pretty is good for party time - but in the stretch you need one mean enough and tough enough to pull the plow when the mule dies.

Don't remember the origin but I do remember the saying from youth.

heh heh heh - After 30 plus years I may be mis-quoting but I'm close.
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Old 05-17-2009, 06:39 PM   #48
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Not having ever been married - pretty is good for party time - but in the stretch you need one mean enough and tough enough to pull the plow when the mule dies.

Don't remember the origin but I do remember the saying from youth.

heh heh heh - After 30 plus years I may be mis-quoting but I'm close.
Well dag. Thats rough.
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Old 05-17-2009, 06:54 PM   #49
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...He was in love..... I've been in love. Other than leading me to get married I don't remember that is made me stupid.
Repeat after me, and click your heels 3x...<waves her magic wand>...

Love is love
Business is business...
Love is love
Business is business...
Love is love
Business is business...

I'll let ya skip the ruby red slipper thing, but only this one time.
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Old 05-17-2009, 09:55 PM   #50
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I heard him on NPR, he was insufferable. He must have said "the love of my life" 5 times. I bet his kids want to hear that. Total jerk with huge sense of entitlement.
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Old 05-17-2009, 09:59 PM   #51
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Hard to have any sympathy for these two.
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Old 05-19-2009, 08:27 PM   #52
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Sounds like it might be fun to experience this!

I heard this guy interviewed on NPR yesterday afternoon as I was Happy Hour bound. IMO, a jerk all the way. I like upper middle class people who have some class. This Dude is a whiner and a weenie. The interviewer (can't remember his name, a guy with an annoying patronizing voice) seemed to buy his line all the way. He was in love..... I've been in love. Other than leading me to get married I don't remember that is made me stupid.

Hello, if they are in love all they need is a baby sitter and a strong bedstead and some eats in the fridge. Oh yeah, and some chicharrones and Pace Picante sauce in case the UncleM stops by.
I heard the same interview - although it was today; we're a little behind in VT. I was on my may to a doctor appointment. Fortunately, it was my opthamologist, so I didn't have to get my blood pressure measured. It would have been higher than normal.

I read about half the NYT article in bed last night before I fell asleep and was really turned off. Then the joker turned up on "Today" this morning.

I lived in Silver Spring, MD for a number of years in a house that looks a bit like his. But a couple of differences between us:
- I could afford my mortgage when I bought the house.
- When I got transferred out of the area, I rented it for 5 years and returned to it. I felt I "deserved" a bigger/better house by then, but stayed in the same house because I knew it was time to save for kids' college costs and by then the mortgage was relatively cheap (due to passage of time and increasing income.)
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Old 05-19-2009, 08:42 PM   #53
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I heard him on NPR, he was insufferable. He must have said "the love of my life" 5 times. I bet his kids want to hear that. Total jerk with huge sense of entitlement.
That's interesting. Sounds like a guy who has something to prove to someone (himself?). Anyway I agree with the last sentence above.
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Old 05-20-2009, 10:09 AM   #54
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Saw him briefly on CNBC last night. He was a weasel (no disrespect to our animal bretheren). He really did not seem to have any real insight or guilt about what he did. They mentioned he had also been on the Today show. So he is evidently out promoting his book.

I hope his editors decide they don't want exposure to anyone with such credibility or ethics issues.

He seems like a douchebag ( am I allowed to say that on this forum?(
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Old 05-20-2009, 10:41 AM   #55
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He seems like a douchebag ( am I allowed to say that on this forum?(
Absolutely not. One of our moderators will be stopping by to wash your mouth out with soap.

Ha
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Old 05-20-2009, 10:47 AM   #56
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Not if the moderator agrees with you, LOL!

What an @$$hat--I heard about half of that NPR story on my story of the day podcast and actually could not make myself finish listening to it. When he said it wasnt' his fault that they gave him a loan, I about hurled.

To join the chorus...cry me a river. Sickening and arrogant. If he was some schmo in a trailer park somewhere who got hoodwinked by a fast talking broker, then I could see it, but this guy? Ugh!
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Old 05-20-2009, 10:57 AM   #57
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He is a major idiot and I have to wonder about the credibility of the NYT to hire such a moron and let him write on financial matters!
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Old 05-20-2009, 04:05 PM   #58
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He is a major idiot and I have to wonder about the credibility of the NYT to hire such a moron and let him write on financial matters!

The same thought crossed my mind. We buy the NYT every Sunday and I generally enjoy the biz section (although I can't recall ever having read anything by this guy.) But if he represents the quality of their business/economics staff, I'm not impressed.
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Old 05-21-2009, 01:05 PM   #59
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How long did he live high on the hog?
Do you think he felt stressed while living high on the hog?
Will he get off repaying little?

Just wondering... I may give that lifestyle a try.
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Old 05-21-2009, 01:32 PM   #60
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He is a major idiot and I have to wonder about the credibility of the NYT to hire such a moron and let him write on financial matters!
New York Times? Credibility?
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