I had to cough up $1500 in 1982 at USNA and that was it. My college fund was dumped into my brother's account and community college/Local U became the best eight years of his life. I don't begrudge the funds he's received nor the choices he's made, but I don't think he's going to be retiring before his SS eligibility either.
West Point wanted a couple thousand bucks on admission day in 2003 and that was it. However the Association of Graduates mercilessly hounded the parent for a $6000 "donation". (To add insult to injury, her son had been in the Army for over three years by that point and had entered his class directly from Iraq.) I've never heard of this "donation pressure" happening at USNA but I bet there's someone in a Bancroft Hall think tank right now trying to implement a similar program.
While 529s do give you flexibility over the beneficiary, it's a little tougher to get flexibility over the purpose-- for example a kid who doesn't use any of the fund (full scholarship, military academy) or who doesn't go to school at all yet needs seed money to fund the next FedEx. So I guess you have to balance the tax savings against the flexibility.
You're doubly (OK, triply) [-]screwed[/-] challenged by not only saving enough for whatever college but by having to do so equitably for all the kids, who will persecute you (and each other) for the remainder of their lives over the slightest perceived inequities.
Another complication is that the cost doesn't matter as much as the kid being able to feel that they're in the right place. Eight years at State U with no degree is more expensive than four years at Harvard, and we know several kids who've had a few false starts.
So perhaps the real problem statement needs to account for your ER goal (primary) followed by saving as much for the family college fund as you feel is appropriate (secondary). If it's enough for all three to attend their dream schools, great. If it's not then it's their problem. However this approach might not make all parents feel that they're getting their kids off to a good start.
As far as equal shares goes, I'd make a public family policy that you'll pay for eight semesters at State U (which gives you the additional advantage of only having to know the costs for the one school) with anything else being their personal funding problem. That way each kid gets a "fair" share and it neatly avoids the issue of paying for grad school, doctorates, law school, MBAs, or apprenticeship training programs. If your investments are successful enough to forecast that you'll have more funding available then change the policy to "State U plus another $10K tuition for whatever you want" and let them figure it out.
Other incentives: Spouse also graduated from USNA. Spouse's father made it clear to her that he was paying for her brother's State U degree because he was a much poorer student (true) and easily distracted (very true). Her parents had to work a lot harder to get her brother to go to college in the first place, let alone graduate. To assuage his concerns, he also bought each of them a good used car. At the time no one felt that anyone had been treated unfairly, and this has never been an issue during subsequent family disharmony.
Whenever our kid's asked questions about college costs, we've told her that we think we have enough to afford to send her wherever she wants to go. (The truth is, that's what we think!) She just wants reassurance, not a budget analysis. We want her to choose a college that she's excited about and feels that she belongs to, not something that's affordable despite its bad fit. Hawaii kids are also notorious for only breaking the apron strings by going to a Mainland school, not to UH Manoa.
We've told her that we'll deposit half the $$ value of every scholarship she wins straight into her checking account for her personal use. (Now she's motivated to write essays and to interview, since she can determine how many hours of effort might yield how many $$.) We've also told her that when she graduates in four years, there will be some form of (as yet unspecified) profit-sharing to be used for a home down payment or toward grad school. Again she's just looking for reassurance, not an audited financial statement. We're trying to fan a spark of motivation into a raging flame...
- College trips (if the kid can't see it then they can't feel ownership, let alone ask the right questions)
- Kumon or other after-school study/tutorial programs
- School field trips like Washington Workshop or other "good student" trips
- SAT/ACT prep software and prep courses
- Application fees, if applicable
West Point wanted a couple thousand bucks on admission day in 2003 and that was it. However the Association of Graduates mercilessly hounded the parent for a $6000 "donation". (To add insult to injury, her son had been in the Army for over three years by that point and had entered his class directly from Iraq.) I've never heard of this "donation pressure" happening at USNA but I bet there's someone in a Bancroft Hall think tank right now trying to implement a similar program.
While 529s do give you flexibility over the beneficiary, it's a little tougher to get flexibility over the purpose-- for example a kid who doesn't use any of the fund (full scholarship, military academy) or who doesn't go to school at all yet needs seed money to fund the next FedEx. So I guess you have to balance the tax savings against the flexibility.
Back in 1992, before 529s and when UTMAs were about the only college-saving game in town, we ran a spreadsheet on the College Board's numbers and decided to save $5000/year. That was painful enough for one kid, but between Berkshire Hathaway & Tweedy Browne Global Value it's kept up with the website's surveys of college-cost inflation.
You're doubly (OK, triply) [-]screwed[/-] challenged by not only saving enough for whatever college but by having to do so equitably for all the kids, who will persecute you (and each other) for the remainder of their lives over the slightest perceived inequities.
Another complication is that the cost doesn't matter as much as the kid being able to feel that they're in the right place. Eight years at State U with no degree is more expensive than four years at Harvard, and we know several kids who've had a few false starts.
So perhaps the real problem statement needs to account for your ER goal (primary) followed by saving as much for the family college fund as you feel is appropriate (secondary). If it's enough for all three to attend their dream schools, great. If it's not then it's their problem. However this approach might not make all parents feel that they're getting their kids off to a good start.
As far as equal shares goes, I'd make a public family policy that you'll pay for eight semesters at State U (which gives you the additional advantage of only having to know the costs for the one school) with anything else being their personal funding problem. That way each kid gets a "fair" share and it neatly avoids the issue of paying for grad school, doctorates, law school, MBAs, or apprenticeship training programs. If your investments are successful enough to forecast that you'll have more funding available then change the policy to "State U plus another $10K tuition for whatever you want" and let them figure it out.
Other incentives: Spouse also graduated from USNA. Spouse's father made it clear to her that he was paying for her brother's State U degree because he was a much poorer student (true) and easily distracted (very true). Her parents had to work a lot harder to get her brother to go to college in the first place, let alone graduate. To assuage his concerns, he also bought each of them a good used car. At the time no one felt that anyone had been treated unfairly, and this has never been an issue during subsequent family disharmony.
Whenever our kid's asked questions about college costs, we've told her that we think we have enough to afford to send her wherever she wants to go. (The truth is, that's what we think!) She just wants reassurance, not a budget analysis. We want her to choose a college that she's excited about and feels that she belongs to, not something that's affordable despite its bad fit. Hawaii kids are also notorious for only breaking the apron strings by going to a Mainland school, not to UH Manoa.
We've told her that we'll deposit half the $$ value of every scholarship she wins straight into her checking account for her personal use. (Now she's motivated to write essays and to interview, since she can determine how many hours of effort might yield how many $$.) We've also told her that when she graduates in four years, there will be some form of (as yet unspecified) profit-sharing to be used for a home down payment or toward grad school. Again she's just looking for reassurance, not an audited financial statement. We're trying to fan a spark of motivation into a raging flame...
Here's a couple additional costs that might be worth funding BEFORE college:
- College trips (if the kid can't see it then they can't feel ownership, let alone ask the right questions)
- Kumon or other after-school study/tutorial programs
- School field trips like Washington Workshop or other "good student" trips
- SAT/ACT prep software and prep courses
- Application fees, if applicable
Yeah, but we always envied you rider guys for your triple-overtime sea pay...
