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View Poll Results: Who manages the $$ in your house
I do, and I'm the female 58 27.62%
I do, and I'm the male 116 55.24%
I'm in a same-sex relationship, and I do it 4 1.90%
We share it 50/50 32 15.24%
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Poll: Who manages the money in your house?
Old 04-07-2013, 03:48 PM   #1
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Poll: Who manages the money in your house?

Livin Large in MT said in another thread:

Quote:
Plus I have to remember that my adorable spouse also has zero interest in any of this and he is likely to outlive me...so again I have to make it easy for him too.
I've wondered about this for a long time, so I thought I'd run a poll. I'm quite certain one has already been done, but I'm obviously not using the right search phrases because I'm not finding anything.

So, who manages most of the finances in your house? Or do you do some of it, and your partner does other parts? Feel free to embellish, and I hope I was PC enough in the poll choices.

My DH is also not even remotely interested in our finances, which just baffles me. I can't imagine trusting anyone 100% with my $$$. I could wipe him out, and he wouldn't know it for a month. Not that I would.
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Old 04-07-2013, 03:51 PM   #2
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I manage it. DW manages to spend it.

She tells me it's a good deal.
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Old 04-07-2013, 04:17 PM   #3
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I do since the wife doesn't want to deal with it. But I do try to keep her fully informed (and it's well documented) in case some day she'll need to take it over.
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Old 04-07-2013, 05:18 PM   #4
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SumDay View Post
Livin Large in MT said in another thread:



I've wondered about this for a long time, so I thought I'd run a poll. I'm quite certain one has already been done, but I'm obviously not using the right search phrases because I'm not finding anything.

So, who manages most of the finances in your house? Or do you do some of it, and your partner does other parts? Feel free to embellish, and I hope I was PC enough in the poll choices.

My DH is also not even remotely interested in our finances, which just baffles me. I can't imagine trusting anyone 100% with my $$$. I could wipe him out, and he wouldn't know it for a month. Not that I would.
+1
I am astounded at the level of trust my DH has in me. I doubt he even knows his VG password. I have written out detailed instructions for him in case I get hit by the proverbial truck.
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Old 04-07-2013, 05:27 PM   #5
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I said that I do it (the female) in our marriage, but in reality I do discuss major stuff with DH. The reality is that he is just not that interested. If I say we can afford $X or that he can retire, that's good enough for him. He vaguely knows our asset allocation and agrees with it, but really pretty much all discussions on this come from me.

I wanted to go over Firecalc and the Fidelity retirement planner with him the other day and he was frankly impatient the entire time. His position on Firecalc is that anyone who thinks they can get to more than 75% or 80% certain is fooling themselves so he really thinks it is silly to try to get to 95% or 100% certainty. He thinks once you get to 80% or so then your plan is fine and you make mid-course corrections as needed. So for him he just doesn't agonize over this stuff.

The other thing is that for most of the people here - we like to discuss the minutiae. This is recreational sport for most of us. To him, this is all boring.

He does have opinions. For example, he pretty much thinks I should quit my semi-retirement work tomorrow although he is OK with me continuing it if I want to. I agonize over it and go through all the pros and cons and how much financial benefit we get if I work X longer. He is just more basic on it (do what makes you happy) and figures we can always adjust spending if we need to.

Once about 10 years or so ago we were debating who did more work at home and he thought what I was doing (managing bill paying and keeping track of our money) was easy. So we switched some jobs and he took over the bills and using the financial software. A month later he gave the job back to me and never made a single complaint again.
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Old 04-07-2013, 05:42 PM   #6
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Originally Posted by mickeyd View Post
I manage it. DW manages to spend it.

She tells me it's a good deal.

LOL... like a joint account - I make deposits and she makes withdrawals.
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Old 04-07-2013, 05:43 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by HighRoller View Post
I do since the wife doesn't want to deal with it. But I do try to keep her fully informed (and it's well documented) in case some day she'll need to take it over.
+1
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Old 04-07-2013, 05:47 PM   #8
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We split the house expenses 50/50 and each manage our own investments. But I got fed up with trying to talk him into some home improvement so I'm paying for it myself. I will enjoy a nicer yard and patio furniture - it took me a while to realize we have different priorities when it comes to home stuff. I'm not spending a fortune - and he paid for half of the kitchen work so I'm not sure what this is about!

So I said 50/50 on the poll question.

Edit: we aren't married, but have been together 20+ years...
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Old 04-07-2013, 05:51 PM   #9
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Well, there's the $$ that come in and the $$ that flow out. We both contribute to each, equitably but not equally.
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Old 04-07-2013, 05:53 PM   #10
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my wife controls all finances. I ask for permission to spend.
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Old 04-07-2013, 05:58 PM   #11
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I do (male). Most of the bills are automatic so no issue...anyone can take a look at the bank account and quickly figure it out.

Like others, I keep a list of assets, accounts, passwords in our safety deposit box.

Biggest issue is getting DW to come along to meetings with our investment advisor so that she could simply carry on should something happen to me.

We both do what we are good at. I do not want to shop or to know anything about that. Happy to do the books.
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Old 04-07-2013, 06:00 PM   #12
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I try at least a couple of times a year, but my DW really doesn't want to know the details, and is happy to leave it all to me.

I maintain a file on my computer called "Open on my death" that contains many pages of detailed information and instructions. I update that file at least a couple of times a year. DW is smarter than I am, so she won't have any problems dealing with it, but she will put it off until necessary.

Fortunately, she is very frugal in almost everything. When she wants to spend any significant amount, she will ask if we can afford it, and I have always answered Yes, so she is comfortable with our situation.

My only concern is that I have too many components in our portfolio, and I am trying to gradually reduce them to a more easily manageable number.
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Old 04-07-2013, 06:04 PM   #13
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I do the finances because I like math and the subject, and was in better financial shape than DW was when we got married. She has access to all of the accounts and I keep her informed but she never paid attention until one of her good friends and one of her sisters ran into severe financial difficulties and she began to get nervous about our finances. When she saw in detail what I had done she was very relieved. Now she pays more attention to them and even took a course on the subject, but she trusts me totally to continue to manage things and is very focused on how she can help improve our financial picture.
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Old 04-07-2013, 06:06 PM   #14
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I wish I could get DW to spend more time on the finances. She doesn't have to decide (specifically) on the investments, but just be a part of the retirement plannng and spending budget process. If something happens to me, I have set her up with Fidelity to use one of their portfolio management services.
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Old 04-07-2013, 06:27 PM   #15
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I checked, "we share it" but I actually manage it exclusively for the last 15 years. BUT, DW managed it for the first half of our marriage, only delegating the task to me when the desire for online banking and internet research (which she loathes doing) coincided with late blooming male maturity mading it optimal for her to make the switch.
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Old 04-07-2013, 06:36 PM   #16
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I chose I do, and I'm the male but my wife certainly has input into the finances. Several times a year we have "meetings" to discuss what to do next, if anything. I usually prepare the information for the meeting, give some direction to the choices we consider and then we act accordingly.
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Old 04-07-2013, 07:40 PM   #17
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I put 50/50 but am not sure if that is the right answer.

While I handle most of the investments, DW does do some. On the expenses, it's the other way around - DW deals with most of it but I take care of some items.
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Old 04-07-2013, 07:56 PM   #18
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Me, I've been married over 30 years and always have done all the investing - but, DW is getting more interested in how we have our portfolio invested. It's fun for me to discuss and explain my plan.
I am flat out addicted to watching the portfolio and second guessing myself...it's a long term learning and torture experience
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Old 04-07-2013, 08:30 PM   #19
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I do and I'm male. But I didn't see an option for I don't and I'm a male (although I suspect that many people who fit in that category would find this forum boring).
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Old 04-07-2013, 08:42 PM   #20
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Bssc, I thought about that. I just made the assumption that most people on this forum would also be the household comptroller. I'm sure there are exceptions, as there are to everything.
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