Stealth Wealth Moment

[pb4uski]

Wow, I'm surprised that two folks have posted in this thread that their wives don't know the family financial status. I find that very disturbing for all kinds of reasons.

Glad we have counseled our kids to make financial compatibility a very important factor in choosing their life partners.

You jump to WAY too many conclusions. DW and I are quite compatible, financially and otherwise. We are both LBYM, but she is more frugal than I. She knows we are well off as we live on the water and are retired early. She just doesn't have interest in the details and trusts that I am on top of it.

My comment on regretting when she finds out was not that I think she would want to split if she knew, but more than she might accelerate spending. 32 years today so we must be doing something right.

If DW asked, I would not withhold anything, but she just isn't interested. My mom is the same way, she trusted dad to take care of those things just like she trusts me to now that dad is gone.

 

[robnplunder]

pb4uski - Some marriages are built on higher level of trust when it comes to finances. Mine is like yours. We trust each other completely when it comes to finances. In our case, we built our wealth together starting with near $0 balance some 28 years ago. Although I have been the sole wage earner for the last 14 years, it is OUR wealth. If divorce is in our card (very unlikely) in the future, it's 50-50 and she knows it.

 

[aja8888]

Wow, I'm surprised that two folks have posted in this thread that their wives don't know the family financial status. I find that very disturbing for all kinds of reasons.

Glad we have counseled our kids to make financial compatibility a very important factor in choosing their life partners.

I hope your children make good choices for their life's partners now that the important factors are established!

I never said DW "doesn't know our family financial status"..........Like others in this situation, over the years, I have tried to involve DW with all the details. She is not interested in our AA, strategy, or why I chose certain funds over others, or the half dozen detailed spreadsheets I play with, etc. Knowing our "number" is not important to either of us and quite frankly, I couldn't tell anyone what it is within 10% at any given time.

She trusts me implicitly and that's good enough for her. She has access to all the accounts and records and a strategy is lined out for her in writing if I pass first. We live frugally and have routine budget/spending talks to stay on course.

Actually, I married her for her other great qualities.

 

[sanfanciscotreat]

The article reports that North Carolina is the only state to have banned the practice! Now, if they could just figure out how to reduce the 7.5 percent income tax, I might decide not to move after all.

Oh, and if all states went the way of Colorado, this would cure itself.

Max NC income tax dropped to 5.8% in January, 2014.
Enough people live here already.

 

[Htown Harry]

Reminds me of the story of the four Texans bragging about how many hundreds of acres of land they owned.

The last guy said that he only owned ten acres.....in downtown Houston.

How ironic my secret is now exposed...on a stealth wealth thread.

 

[sengsational]

Now, if they could just figure out how to reduce the 7.5 percent income tax, I might decide not to move after all.

Max NC income tax dropped to 5.8% in January, 2014.

Would you rather pay 7.5% on 70K (2011 and before) or 5.8% on 100K (2014)?

Instead of calculating tax based on the Federal Taxable Income, in 2012 they changed the calculation to use the Federal Adjusted Gross Income, thereby adding to the taxable base amount.

So with a wave of the hand, they added $30K to my base state NC taxable income in both 2012 and 2013. And now, after running off with the money for two years, they all pat themselves on the back for how great it is to reduce the tax rate.

 

[pb4uski]

pb4uski - Some marriages are built on higher level of trust when it comes to finances. Mine is like yours. We trust each other completely when it comes to finances. In our case, we built our wealth together starting with near $0 balance some 28 years ago. Although I have been the sole wage earner for the last 14 years, it is OUR wealth. If divorce is in our card (very unlikely) in the future, it's 50-50 and she knows it.

+1, but I had 60% me and 40% her more in mind.

 

[scrabbler1]

Would you rather pay 7.5% on 70K (2011 and before) or 5.8% on 100K (2014)?

Instead of calculating tax based on the Federal Taxable Income, in 2012 they changed the calculation to use the Federal Adjusted Gross Income, thereby adding to the taxable base amount.

So with a wave of the hand, they added $30K to my base state NC taxable income in both 2012 and 2013. And now, after running off with the money for two years, they all pat themselves on the back for how great it is to reduce the tax rate.

New York did something like this on a smaller scale back in the early 1990s when they had a fiscal crunch. They got rid of the personal exemption for yourself so they raised everyone's taxable income $1,000. The marginal tax rate most people paid was just under 8% at the time so that meant everyone had to pay about $79 more in state income taxes but the pols were able to boast in the next election how they did not raise the tax rates on anyone.

 

[robnplunder]

+1, but I had 60% me and 40% her more in mind.

What I have in mind don't matter. DW spells alimony "a-l-l-m-o-n-e-y." I'd be lucky to get 50 - we are living in CA (dazed and confused about legal matters).

 

[FUEGO]

On the flip side, I worked with a guy who always had at least $2,000 in cash in his wallet. Would often make a show of paying cash by whipping out a few $100's before he could 'find' a $20 dollar bill.

Sadly, it all the money he had in the world.

This. I associate poor people with having a lot of cash and paying in cash. My mostly poor in-laws operate on a mostly cash basis (although they all have checking accounts and/or debit cards). Sometimes I'll buy something for them online, and they don't bat an eye when they dig in their wallet for $500 in crisp $20's and fork it over to reimburse me. They tend to cash their paycheck and keep most or all of it in cash. The checking account is what you use to pay the power bill and cable bill, but you go shopping with cash.

 

[travelover]

This. I associate poor people with having a lot of cash and paying in cash...........

I've noticed this, too, when I shop in a neighboring 'burb with more poor residents. It is ironic that I am paying 98% of full price with my Fido AmEx and they are paying 100%, with cash.

 

[aaronc879]

This. I associate poor people with having a lot of cash and paying in cash. My mostly poor in-laws operate on a mostly cash basis (although they all have checking accounts and/or debit cards). Sometimes I'll buy something for them online, and they don't bat an eye when they dig in their wallet for $500 in crisp $20's and fork it over to reimburse me. They tend to cash their paycheck and keep most or all of it in cash. The checking account is what you use to pay the power bill and cable bill, but you go shopping with cash.

I'm one of the "poor" cash users. To me, there is a disconnect when using a credit card. I don't think of how much i'm spending if i'm just handing over a card. If I use cash then I see how much i'm spending and it helps to keep my spending down. Works for me

 

[Mulligan]

I'm one of the "poor" cash users. To me, there is a disconnect when using a credit card. I don't think of how much i'm spending if i'm just handing over a card. If I use cash then I see how much i'm spending and it helps to keep my spending down. Works for me

I used to be that way, and still have to have a $100-$200 in my wallet or I feel uneasy. But with that being said, about 4 years ago, I converted to using my cash back credit card to purchase all my monthly expenses incurred and then pay it all off at end of the month. I mentally deduct each purchase from my checking account. I am not an over zealous person in this regard on getting cash back, but it is amazing how it still adds up. My dishwasher went out on me last winter I paid for it with my accrued cash back money. Already I have about $300 built back up. I'm about ready to need a new washer and I will let the credit card cash pay for it soon too. Many people here do way better at me than this. I should be more aggressive with it as it is easy money once you get over the initial phase of not trusting yourself.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

 

[youbet]

Luxury car dealers will tell you that nowadays, the guy with the jean shorts, T shirt, flip flops and baseball cap is the one that will drop $120K on a car and pay cash. (no, not a drug dealer either)

And car dealerships are NOT impressed by someone paying cash. They much prefer someone financing through them! Money (in their pockets) talks!

 

[youbet]

To me, there is a disconnect when using a credit card. I don't think of how much i'm spending if i'm just handing over a card.

That can happen and, in fact, my DW readily admits to being less thoughtful about purchases when she's using the CC. She's gotten much better but we still have her carry significant cash when she's out with the girls visiting quilt shops, antique stores, various boutiques, etc. Even if she has several hundred bux in her purse, she's quite the throughtful and schrewd shopper. With the CC, a bit less.

I tend to be the opposite. Say I'm sitting down at the pub for a couple cold ones on a hot afternoon. I put a twenty on the bar from which the bartender makes change as I order drinks. 3 - 4 pints later, I leave without much consideration for the remainder which becomes the bartenders tip. If I'm short on cash and tell the bartender I'll be running a tab and paying by CC, I'm keenly aware of how much I'm spending as I go along and at tip time, calculate an appropriate amount to add on thoughtfully.

I guess whether you're more "money careful" with cash or with CC depends on the person.......

 

[marko]

And car dealerships are NOT impressed by someone paying cash. They much prefer someone financing through them! Money (in their pockets) talks!

At $120K to $200K for a car, the salesman/dealer I spoke to is quite pleased with the sale, cash or financed.

 

[youbet]

At $120K to $200K for a car, the salesman/dealer I spoke to is quite pleased with the sale, cash or financed.

Yes, the salesman is quite pleased with the cash sale, despite it not being as profitable to them as the internally financed sale. It's certainly muich better than no sale! But, as I said, cash buyers generally don't impress car dealerships. They like making money off of financing.

 

[Meadbh]

I'm one of the "poor" cash users. To me, there is a disconnect when using a credit card. I don't think of how much i'm spending if i'm just handing over a card. If I use cash then I see how much i'm spending and it helps to keep my spending down. Works for me

It's funny, but I feel the exact opposite. When I pay with a credit card I get a receipt and I can see my purchases online and follow my balance. When I pay with cash (e.g. at some farmers' markets) sometimes they do not provide receipts. Since I now calculate all my expenses in every category on a monthly basis, this means I have to record that cash purchase myself. Yesterday I had five or six Post it notes when doing my calculations for July. It took me a while to read my own writing! I honestly feel I do not spend more money when using a credit card. I stick to my budget and I manage to control impulse spending. I do, however, use credit to manage my cash flow. For example, I renewed my car insurance on the last possible day, because that day was the first day of a new credit cycle. That gives me six weeks' use of the money before the bill is deducted from my bank account.

 

[LoneAspen]

I'm one of those people that never carry cash. It's so damned inconvenient. I hate tracking down the closest ATM to get cash for something and then usually paying fees on top of it because the closest one is almost never my bank.

My usual source for cash is when I go out to lunch with friends. They carry cash and I don't, so I'll pay for everybody's meal with my card, and they pay me back with cash. Then I just end up spending (wasting?) it on petty crap as I'm out, that I otherwise wouldn't buy.

Honestly, I could function quite well in a cashless society unless I got addicted to drugs or hookers. And I wouldn't be surprised if some hookers used Square now!

 

[scrabbler1]

About a year ago, I got a cash-back credit card. I began using the CC in place of cash for my most frequent type of purchase, food at the supermarket. I use it any time the purchase is more than $40 and sometimes if it is between $30 and $40. Under $30 I still pay cash. The handy thing about the CC is that I don't have to worry about having enough cash should I find my costliest item, boneless chicken, on sale, and I decide to load up on several large packages.

I still have to make trips to the ATM but now it is about once a month instead of twice a month. I rarely spend more than $40 for any purchase so the CC doesn't get used very often anywhere else.

 

[Rustward]

I'm one of the "poor" cash users. To me, there is a disconnect when using a credit card. I don't think of how much i'm spending if i'm just handing over a card. If I use cash then I see how much i'm spending and it helps to keep my spending down. Works for me

Just the opposite here. I am VERY acutely aware of every credit card balance at all times to the phooking PENNY.

We have absolutely no problem equating making a charge (or writing a check) to cash leaving our hands. I know that many people avoid using credit cards but it's just something I cannot get my head around.

No, I am not saying everybody should do it the way I do it.

Edit to add: Are there people who can successfully manage a checking account that avoid credit cards? I guess I don't see much difference between a checking account and a credit card account, as far as tracking and managing balances.

Or do the people who suffer creditcard-phobia make no effort to track the balance of the account. It just seems to me that if you track the balance, the credit card is not going to assume a life of its own and "sneak up on you".

 

[braumeister]

This is really interesting.
I use cash a lot (always have at least $100 in my wallet).

But I track my expenses in a very non-standard way.
I have a budget category called Cash/Din/Ent) that includes all cash withdrawals from ATMs, all restaurant dining on credit cards, and all entertainment expenses on credit cards).

So once I get cash in my wallet, that expenditure is put in the software, alongside movies, concerts, restaurants, etc. I don't worry about recording things I buy with cash.

The whole Cash/Din/Ent category amounts to about 12% of my total budget, so I don't worry about it.

Odd, but it works for me.

 

[grasshopper]

Back to car wrecks, I was t-boned by a driver totally her fault. Except she admitted it in writing at the scene. I go home a police officer is knocking at my door. He wants me to hand over the signed statement, saying the driver was new in the state and didn't better.

Mean while I was driving in an ice/snow storm, and I slid into a 20 YO POS pickup truck. The crazy thing is we were both 50 ft off the highway in a ditch. I really didn't see any damage, I tell him to get a estimate and I will pay out of pocket. I get the estimate and on it is $900 for damage to 2 custom wheels, the truck wasn't worth the price of the wheels. So you learn.

 

[calmloki]

That can happen and, in fact, my DW readily admits to being less thoughtful a.... schrewd shopper. With the CC, a bit less.

...
I guess whether you're more "money careful" with cash or with CC depends on the person.......

Nice - like this malaprop.

 

[growing_older]

Mean while I was driving in an ice/snow storm, and I slid into a 20 YO POS pickup truck. The crazy thing is we were both 50 ft off the highway in a ditch. I really didn't see any damage, I tell him to get a estimate and I will pay out of pocket. I get the estimate and on it is $900 for damage to 2 custom wheels

And he is absolutely certain YOU caused the damage and not his own 50ft skid off the highway into the ditch before you got there. Right.