Join Early Retirement Today
Reply
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread Display Modes
Old 07-06-2007, 09:22 AM   #61
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
FinanceDude's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 12,484
Quote:
Originally Posted by FIREdreamer View Post
Look, I don't write checks on her behalf (and I certainly don't have her checkbook), she makes her own transactions, writes her own checks, makes her own decisions as to what she spends her money on and I never, never sign anything in her place. Everything I propose in terms of investments, we discuss first, I make sure she understands it and then if she agrees she takes care of buying/selling it herself. I never represented myself as a financial professional, I never entered any written or verbal agreement with her, I never made any promises, I never profited from my own advice to her, and my name or signature never appears anywhere on her financial paperwork. So as far as I am concerned she's gonna have a hell of a time proving I am responsible for her situation if she goes bankrupt... of course if she still tried to sue me (and therefore my wife) then it is clear that she will probably finish her lonely days in a God forsaken nursing home sponsored by Medicaid...

No so fast and easy sir.....all she needs is a sympathetic judge and a good lawyer.

If the attorney can PROVE you ran her finances, then you are an "unofficial fiduciary" and you are not in the clear. It matters little how things "turned out".

Plus, you're forgetting the "guilt factor" with your wife. While it may be easy for YOU to put your MIL in a nursing home on Medicaid, you wife will feel differently, trust me.......



Stranger things have happened.
__________________

__________________
Consult with your own advisor or representative. My thoughts should not be construed as investment advice. Past performance is no guarantee of future results (love that one).......:)


This Thread is USELESS without pics.........:)
FinanceDude is offline   Reply With Quote
Join the #1 Early Retirement and Financial Independence Forum Today - It's Totally Free!

Are you planning to be financially independent as early as possible so you can live life on your own terms? Discuss successful investing strategies, asset allocation models, tax strategies and other related topics in our online forum community. Our members range from young folks just starting their journey to financial independence, military retirees and even multimillionaires. No matter where you fit in you'll find that Early-Retirement.org is a great community to join. Best of all it's totally FREE!

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest so you have limited access to our community. Please take the time to register and you will gain a lot of great new features including; the ability to participate in discussions, network with our members, see fewer ads, upload photographs, create a retirement blog, send private messages and so much, much more!

Old 07-06-2007, 09:24 AM   #62
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
FinanceDude's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 12,484
I know you are doing your best to help her in a tough situation.

Good luck..........
__________________

__________________
Consult with your own advisor or representative. My thoughts should not be construed as investment advice. Past performance is no guarantee of future results (love that one).......:)


This Thread is USELESS without pics.........:)
FinanceDude is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-06-2007, 11:00 AM   #63
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 474
I’ve been reading through this thread and wondering if things are really all that dire.

MIL has an income of 6k a month and is spending 4.7k a month. At age 70 she will have an income of 1.4k a month from SS. She also has 300k in invested assets and a 200k house. The income could stop at any time, and will definitely run out in 10 years.

If things continue exactly as they are then in 10 years MIL should have about 700k (assuming constant spending of 4.7k a month, and a 5% investment return), and be able to spend something like 3k a month (at 75 she might be fine with a WR > 4%) from investments and 1.4k from SS. No problem.

If something bad does happen to the income in the next 10 years, then the possibility of running out of money may seem a lot more real to her than it does now, and she will probably have an easier time spending less. In this scenario she may have to cut expenses significantly, but while the adjustment may be more severe from a financial standpoint, it will be easier for her to make psychologically when she sees the reason. You know what? If it happens, she will probably have no regrets.

Worst case is that she starts spending a lot more than 4.7k a month, stops saving entirely, and then the alimony stops because her ex decides to retire - so she sees him enjoying life while she’s eating beans. That will be tough, but she’ll still have SS and some investment income to live on, so she won’t be living out of a box. She may also get bailed out by high investment returns for the next few years, selling her house, or meeting a sugar daddy. Maybe none of those are very likely, but you never know. She may also not live to see the day of reckoning.

Most of the people around here are high-planning types that like to see a 99% probability of success in their forecasts. Not everyone is like that. A member of my family is in his 70's, spends like it’s going out of style, and is 100%+ equities (with a couple mortgages) mostly in emerging markets and biotech all managed by a professional advisor. Every once in a while he’ll ask me if I think China or India or gold is a better place for him to put money. I’ll tell him that TIPS are nice, and I like index funds, but I don’t think he has a lot of interest. I used to be worried, but this has been going on for ten years now. He’s gotten this far, and will probably end up fine. I feel worse for his wife who is several years younger, will likely outlive him by a while, and is completely uninvolved in their finances. What can you do? Make polite comments when asked, and try and stay out of it otherwise. The hardest thing is not letting it bother you, and smiling when they tell you “bonds just went down the tank, and my mongolian yak futures are up 63%! Good thing I don't take your advice!”
__________________
bongo2 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-06-2007, 11:11 AM   #64
Moderator Emeritus
 
Join Date: May 2007
Posts: 11,044
Quote:
Plus, you're forgetting the "guilt factor" with your wife. While it may be easy for YOU to put your MIL in a nursing home on Medicaid, you wife will feel differently, trust me.......
Not if her mom tries to sue us... trust me...
__________________
FIREd is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-06-2007, 12:16 PM   #65
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
FinanceDude's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 12,484
Quote:
Originally Posted by FIREdreamer View Post
Not if her mom tries to sue us... trust me...
I'll have to believe you on that. What I was trying to say is even "semi-estranged" relationships get a whole new twist when issues arise...........
__________________
Consult with your own advisor or representative. My thoughts should not be construed as investment advice. Past performance is no guarantee of future results (love that one).......:)


This Thread is USELESS without pics.........:)
FinanceDude is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-06-2007, 12:18 PM   #66
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
FinanceDude's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 12,484
Quote:
Originally Posted by bongo2 View Post
Most of the people around here are high-planning types that like to see a 99% probability of success in their forecasts. Not everyone is like that. A member of my family is in his 70's, spends like it’s going out of style, and is 100%+ equities (with a couple mortgages) mostly in emerging markets and biotech all managed by a professional advisor. Every once in a while he’ll ask me if I think China or India or gold is a better place for him to put money. I’ll tell him that TIPS are nice, and I like index funds, but I don’t think he has a lot of interest. I used to be worried, but this has been going on for ten years now. He’s gotten this far, and will probably end up fine. I feel worse for his wife who is several years younger, will likely outlive him by a while, and is completely uninvolved in their finances. What can you do? Make polite comments when asked, and try and stay out of it otherwise. The hardest thing is not letting it bother you, and smiling when they tell you “bonds just went down the tank, and my mongolian yak futures are up 63%! Good thing I don't take your advice!”
__________________
Consult with your own advisor or representative. My thoughts should not be construed as investment advice. Past performance is no guarantee of future results (love that one).......:)


This Thread is USELESS without pics.........:)
FinanceDude is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-07-2007, 07:41 AM   #67
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 329
Quote:
Originally Posted by bongo2 View Post
The hardest thing is not letting it bother you, and smiling when they tell you “bonds just went down the tank, and my mongolian yak futures are up 63%! Good thing I don't take your advice!”
Screw all the advice I've gotten from you guys! Where can I get in on these mongolian yak futures?!
__________________
NinjaPigeon is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-07-2007, 02:19 PM   #68
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
2B's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Houston
Posts: 4,330
In my "active investor" days I did it all. I have had some unbelieveable "scores" worthy of putting me on the cover of Money Magazine. I've also had some total disasters. I lived in self-delusion about how much I was "beating the averages" but it was mostly my selective memory that tended to block out the impact of the "insignificant losses."

Quicken changed all that. With a few key strokes I could see that my high testosterone portfolio (commodities, options, hot tips, technical analysis, fundamental analysis, trend chasing) got me somewhere between half or less of the return of the Couch Potato Investor. That was humbling.

I've been a reformed hyper-investor since the late 90's and believe me it was tough staying completely out of the tech craze. Unfortunately, I fell off the wagon in late 99 and bought a few "solid" companies -- Cisco, Lucent and Enron. They cured me and, all I can say, it was money well lost if I never go back.

I do notice that when I talk to individual "active" investors that they also seem to forget their losers. It's only the big winner last year and the big winner their latest buy is going to be.

I will concede that many great fortunes were made by people who made a big investment in many companies -- Cisco, Lucent and Enron all come to mind but it was also knowing when to get in and when to get out. I must regretably confess I am not that clever.
__________________
2B is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2007, 08:51 AM   #69
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
FinanceDude's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 12,484
Quote:
Originally Posted by 2B View Post
I do notice that when I talk to individual "active" investors that they also seem to forget their losers. It's only the big winner last year and the big winner their latest buy is going to be.
A BULL market creates amnesia, a BEAR market creates liars...........
__________________
Consult with your own advisor or representative. My thoughts should not be construed as investment advice. Past performance is no guarantee of future results (love that one).......:)


This Thread is USELESS without pics.........:)
FinanceDude is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2007, 10:25 AM   #70
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Moemg's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Sarasota,fl.
Posts: 10,036
[quote
Quicken changed all that. With a few key strokes I could see that my high testosterone portfolio (commodities, options, hot tips, technical analysis, fundamental analysis, trend chasing) got me somewhere between half or less of the return of the Couch Potato Investor. That was humbling.

[/quote]


Great post ! I have only one question .Since some of us women go through the same stage is it still a High Testosterone Portfolio ?
__________________
Moemg is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2007, 10:47 AM   #71
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
FinanceDude's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 12,484
Quote:
Originally Posted by Moemg View Post
[quote
Great post ! I have only one question .Since some of us women go through the same stage is it still a High Testosterone Portfolio ?
I believe it's called "Estrogen Overdrive Portfolio"......
__________________
Consult with your own advisor or representative. My thoughts should not be construed as investment advice. Past performance is no guarantee of future results (love that one).......:)


This Thread is USELESS without pics.........:)
FinanceDude is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2007, 10:59 AM   #72
Full time employment: Posting here.
 
Join Date: Jun 2007
Posts: 567
Quote:
Originally Posted by Moemg View Post
Great post ! I have only one question .Since some of us women go through the same stage is it still a High Testosterone Portfolio ?
You're allowed to call it:

Temporary Stupidity
Moments of Man-Channeling
__________________
Webzter is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-09-2007, 05:47 PM   #73
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
2B's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Houston
Posts: 4,330
[quote=Moemg;533952

Great post ! I have only one question .Since some of us women go through the same stage is it still a High Testosterone Portfolio ?[/quote]

Absolutely! It'll put hair on your chest!
__________________
2B is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-18-2007, 05:13 PM   #74
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Milton's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 2,079
Bongo2: great post! The situation you describe is completely alien to my own nature [theme song: ], but I could not agree more with your point. There certainly are many people like that; indeed, probably they are in the majority.

Most of the people on this forum will disagree heartily with the carefree approach [theme song: ]; but we will get no thanks trying to convert anyone, and it is pointless to try.
__________________
"To know what you prefer, instead of humbly saying Amen to what the world tells you you ought to prefer, is to have kept your soul alive". Robert Louis Stevenson, An Inland Voyage (1878)
Milton is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 07-18-2007, 08:37 PM   #75
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
2B's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Houston
Posts: 4,330
Quote:
Originally Posted by Milton View Post
Bongo2: great post! The situation you describe is completely alien to my own nature [theme song: ], but I could not agree more with your point. There certainly are many people like that; indeed, probably they are in the majority.

Most of the people on this forum will disagree heartily with the carefree approach [theme song: ]; but we will get no thanks trying to convert anyone, and it is pointless to try.
I agree but that ruins your credibility.
__________________

__________________
2B is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Fed employee life insurance ats5g FIRE and Money 2 10-10-2006 11:44 PM
Another article on our inability to save REWahoo Other topics 49 03-10-2006 10:59 AM
Give life to your dreams dex Young Dreamers 14 09-19-2005 09:28 AM
Financial ducks and stuff mickeyd FIRE and Money 25 02-10-2005 10:01 AM
Term vs. whole life? retire_asap Other topics 9 10-28-2004 08:05 PM

 

 
All times are GMT -6. The time now is 02:27 AM.
 
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.