Weird reactions to early retirement announcement.

[brett]

I have a SIL who thinks we must be rich and 'lucky' because we retired at 59 and travel quite a bit.

As I pointed out to my wife...we don't own two top of the line iphones with the full meal deal package, we don't operate two cars we cannot afford, we don't live in a house we cannot afford, we don't eat out three or four times a week, and we never run an O/S balance on our credit cards, we don't buy furniture on the never never plan/don't pay a dime plan.


We actually planned our life and made pro-active decisions-some of them very difficult. We did not sit back an just let things happen.


So I guess we are 'lucky'

 

[ivinsfan]

I have a SIL who thinks we must be rich and 'lucky' because we retired at 59 and travel quite a bit.

As I pointed out to my wife...we don't own two top of the line iphones with the full meal deal package, we don't operate two cars, we don't live in a house we cannot afford, we don't eat out three or four times a week, and we never run an O/S balance on our credit cards, we don't buy furniture on the never never plan/don't pay a dime plan.


We actually planned our life and made active decisions. We did not sit back an just let things happen.


So I guess we are 'lucky'

Calling someone "lucky" simply points out how clueless and uninformed the speaker is. Making comments about someone's deceased spouse, is cruel and mean-spirited.

 

[akck]

Hope you get selected, but is there anything you can do that would make you "less" valuable to the organization while not hurting your employment until your planned retirement date? Something like spinning off a project to a younger coworker making them more valuable?


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[youbet]

Anyhoo, me and a few others told some coworkers that we were accepting the package.
comments have been eye opening to say the least.

We've had a number of threads on the subject of "reactions of others to my RE announcement." The one common thing I notice occuring prior to the OP receiving unwanted comments is the OP telling others. It has to be so tempting to do so. You're excited. You're likely hoping for some consensual validation of your decision. Etc.

But it does seem like NOT telling others and simply waiting to see how the application process goes and eventually letting the system (management, HR, whoever) get the word out as necessary would be the way to go.

The "quiet strategy" pretty much worked for me, although the situation was not exactly the same.

 

[Markola]

We actually planned our life and made pro-active decisions-some of them very difficult. We did not sit back an just let things happen.

So I guess we are 'lucky'

This is often unappreciated by those just living the normal American have-money/spend-money existence. Your comment reminded me about actors and athletes who get their "lucky break," yet it is rarely mentioned in the press that he/she has been 100% dedicated to pursuing their passion since childhood.


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[Andre1969]

One phrase that's always bugged me is when someone says "You don't know how lucky you are". I can concede that I am where I am today partly because of luck. Selling my condo at just the right time and making a nice profit, investing and rebalancing at the right time, some help from family, etc. But it's the "you don't know..." part that really gets under my skin. How do they know whether I know or not?

 

[bclover]

We've had a number of threads on the subject of "reactions of others to my RE announcement." The one common thing I notice occuring prior to the OP receiving unwanted comments is the OP telling others. It has to be so tempting to do so. You're excited. You're likely hoping for some consensual validation of your decision. Etc.

But it does seem like NOT telling others and simply waiting to see how the application process goes and eventually letting the system (management, HR, whoever) get the word out as necessary would be the way to go.

The "quiet strategy" pretty much worked for me, although the situation was not exactly the same.

I think this was a unique situation in that everyone got the info at the same time. Friday at 8 we got the email, then at 10:30 we had an informational meeting with HR where we got to ask question.

Then Friday afternoon we had a business meeting saying how bad the company was/is hemorrhaging money.

Lol, what's funny is that I actually came here to ask others opinions.

So basically Monday morning everybody was talking about it and saying whether of not they were going to apply.

Today things seem back to normal, believe me though when the final decision is made I do plan on keeping my lips sealed. which in itself seems a bit sad

 

[MrLoco]

I think your response to the questions should have been:

1) Yes! He left me a fortune! I'm planning a month long cruise to Europe!

2) Yes I know you will still be working. Make sure you pay your taxes on time. I want to maximize my ACA tax subsidies!

Then smile and walk away!

 

[kcowan]

After the offer, I spent 3 weeks getting up to speed on NPV planning and then made the decision declaration 5 weeks ahead of the deadline. Management wanted me to stay around, and I agreed to stay for 2 additional months. I also did one day a week of consulting.

Many of my workmates were surprised. I said I loved my job but I could not pass up the financial opportunity.

 

[Taxman59]

My boss told me I would be back working in a month or so "after you have rearranged the soup cabinet two or three times"! It has been 3 1/2 months, and I haven't even opened the soup cabinet once! Most of the co-workers were nice and envious, just my boss had obnoxious comments.


Have the day you deserve, and let Karma sort it out.

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[youbet]

So basically Monday morning everybody was talking about it and saying whether of not they were going to apply.

I'm simply suggesting that instead of "everybody was talking about it and saying whether or not they were going to apply," it should have been "everybody except bclover..........."

I went through pretty much the same thing you did except I did NOT talk about whether I would apply or not (except to two close friends/confidants and my DW). With others, I simply discussed general pros and cons of the package without any reference to my personal situation or decision.

In the end, I did not apply for the voluntary buy-out package but did receive a very fair severance/benefits-continuation package when I was laid off several years later at age 58.

After the layoff, I did utilize the placement services MegaCorp was providing for a couple of months. I never mentioned to anyone that my job search was optional and that I didn't need to work. When no really appealing opportunities appeared and I decided to call "fired" "FIRE'd," I did tell friends that I was done with my working life. I wanted to step out of the networking stream and not have friends waste their time since I was no longer interested in receiving any tips, references, introductions, etc.....

So, yes, if you don't want your personal situation to be an open book and talked about (sometimes inappropriately) I'd suggest you censor your participation in conversations to non-personal observations about the whole situation with your company.


Good luck! And enjoy FIRE!


Edit: I'll add that even after I pulled the plug on job hunting and backed out of the networking stream, I still helped friends, who for whatever reason needed to continue working, with resume editing, practice interviews, references and access to any of my lingering connections in the industry. Now nine years+ FIRE'd, it's only recently that requests for this type of help have diminished to near zero.

 

[Hyper]

Nasty yrs in the recession. Lots of back stabbing because many were afraid about losing their jobs. I had asked for a layoff 3 times but never got it. Done @ 45 + with a bit of a push 3 yrs ago. I still do not tell very many I am retired, one because of the negative comments I always get and two because I still do some non income projects and when someone finds out you are retired they think you are as rich as Warren Buffet and really try to charge you!!! I keep it to myself!