Weird reactions to early retirement announcement.

[bclover]

First, thanks all for everyone's well thought out opinions to my thread last week about accepting a package. my corp is offering.

I've had some rather interesting discussions this morning.

So after giving it some thought I submitting my paperwork to apply for what they are calling VSP (voluntary separation program).

Of course this is all the topic today and to make matters worse there was an article in a Delaware newspaper over the weekend that painting a not so nice picture for the future.

Mods, delete if we're not supposed to link stuff.

DuPont CEO Kullman's exit seen as turning point for company, Delaware

Anyhoo, me and a few others told some coworkers that we were accepting the package.
comments have been eye opening to say the least.

1) "must be nice to have a rich husband leave you a bunch of money".
So I jokingly say, that while my late husband did love us enough to make sure he had all his ducks in a row, losing your spouse at 52 is not a route I would suggest anyone to take.

2) " I wish I could lounge around the house and do nothing, some of us have to work for a living"
WTF correct me if I'm wrong but 22 years at the same company did require me to leave the house every once in a while

just as an example.

Now I hope I'm being sensitive to the fact that there is a real fear around the watercooler today. people are truly frightened about the future of their jobs, I get it but dang it all, what is with the "I'm miserable, let me make you equally as miserable" attitude.

and another compadre J who put in his application is fielding some snide cracks.

Did anyone else get this when they said they were retiring early. wow

 

[ShortInSeattle]

I'm so sorry that you've had to deal with such nastiness.

The second comment is rude, while the first is downright horrible.

Congrats on your decision! I suppose an extra perk is that you won't need to deal with the meanies too much longer.

SIS

 

[Meadbh]

It looks like you made the right decision. People are scared and their jealousy is showing. Just try to ignore it and focus on ER.

 

[audreyh1]

They should be grateful that you are leaving - maybe means one less cut for folks who can't afford to leave.

Sounds like very sour and bitter grapes! These folks are forced to realize they can't afford to do what you are doing.

 

[mystang52]

Some very nasty co-workers there. Sounds like they are bitterly jealous.

 

[steelyman]

It looks like you made the right decision. People are scared and their jealousy is showing. Just try to ignore it and focus on ER.

I agree. It's easy to get caught up in those kinds of remarks while still on the job, but they magically disappear once you're able to do as you please with your day.

Most of my friends are still working and they'll mention it in a non-jealous way, mainly they're curious about how they can follow in those footsteps too.

 

[MRG]

Wow,

Time to go. Those are way beyond anything I've heard of. I got snubbed by a couple of folks I started with, but nothing like what you heard.

The worst I received was my mangler who said he was envious. He was middle 60s and I retired at 56, so I understood it. Those folks you're with are scared of their future.

 

[Lakewood90712]

Fear often brings out true colors. A couple of fearful / small minded , soon to be ex co-workers to avoid.

Avoid even thinking about these unfortunate encounters if you can. Consider it background noise.

 

[tmm99]

Wow,

Time to go. Those are way beyond anything I've heard of. I got snubbed by a couple of folks I started with, but nothing like what you heard.

The worst I received was my mangler who said he was envious. He was middle 60s and I retired at 56, so I understood it. Those folks you're with are scared of their future.

+1 I am appalled that people actually said these things to your face! Mine was just "I am envious" comments also. "I wish I could do what you are doing but I still have 2 years left til my youngest is done with college" kind of comments.

 

[EastWest Gal]

I got all sorts of positive, envious, congratulations. Then, half the group quit over the next 6 months!

Work environments, especially in publicly traded corporations where it's all about the shareholders and paying layers of management, are clearly very stressful. Most of the reactions are out of their own fears and wishes, and have nothing to do with you.

 

[daylatedollarshort]

DH never heard from a co-worker he had been friends with after he told her he retired after a similar situation at work. One day she called to drop by, asked how the job search was going and when she found out there was no job search she not only didn't drop by but we never heard from her again. I guess if misery loves company maybe the opposite is also true.

 

[Big_Hitter]

it's just sour grapes - enjoy your ER!

 

[enjoyinglife102]

No matter what in life, there are always people who will project their negative attitudes on you rather than join you in your positive accomplishments. I would be grateful that I wouldn't have to associate with them much longer.

 

[Sunset]

I've been told I look too young to be retired, which I guess is kinda nice.

Too bad these people cannot express it in a more positive way, after all, they all will retire or die on the job someday.

 

[Bestwifeever]

Say "You're welcome" after you point out to them that your leaving might keep their jobs safe, which they apparently need.

And please, burst into tears if someone throws the "lucky your DH died" comment at you. That's so awful, it is just hurtful.

 

[l8_apex]

Frankly it's not surprising. I blame it on the negative social conditioning that's going on all around us. The drive at work for promotions and pay raises: knowing that they're limited and "if you get it, I won't" plus the whole materialistic, keeping-up-with-the-Jones's attitude everywhere.

When I retire I'm just going to give my notice and not go into the details. Those coworkers that want to know can come and ask and I'll tell them individually, as well as extend the offer to describe to them how I went about ER. I'm interested to see who wants to hear the details, I can't really tell despite having been with most of my coworkers for 4 years now.

So don't let it get you down. As others have said, it's just jealousy and a sign of the concern for their own futures.

 

[Big_Hitter]

And please, burst into tears if someone throws the "lucky your DH died" comment at you. That's so awful, it is just hurtful.

agreed, very uncouth

 

[ivinsfan]

Tears? I'd probably say, Did you really just say that? I guess you were raised by wolves.

 

[Greencheese]

I feel like these reactions are the same as other situations of success. Sure there's some luck involved but success is usually the result of hard work and planning. Yours just came to fruition before others and it's not "fair" that they can't have their cake and eat it right now too.

 

[rodi]

I think it's human nature - and as other said, based on fear for their own financial security.

I announced my retirement (at age 52) shortly after 2 other people in my small development group had retired. The folks who I worked closely with weren't surprised because I'd been open about reducing expenses, maxing savings in order to retire early. Those who I interacted with less frequently were very surprised... and I got some snarky comments also. One of the worst was from a coworker I'd shared an office with for years... He'd regularly accused me of being "cheap" for bringing in my lunch, not having a smart phone (until prices came down), etc... Same age as me, but he knows he'll be working for decades to come. I attributed his snarky response to jealousy. He later apologized and we're still good friends. (Although I disregard his freely offered "financial advice" about the wonders of leverage and debt to pay for daytrading.)

 

[Dog]

Tears? I'd probably say, Did you really just say that? I guess you were raised by wolves.

Perfect comeback!

Sad, that people can be so insensitive.


Sent from my iPhone using Early Retirement Forum

 

[FUEGO]

Sounds like a good time to extricate yourself from that nonsense. Lots of jealousy from those who didn't prepare very well for what lies head in the future.

 

[ivinsfan]

Sounds like a good time to extricate yourself from that nonsense. Lots of jealousy from those who didn't prepare very well for what lies head in the future.

How does someone else's lack of preparation or jealously override the rules of common decency? Sad that people are so self-centered.

 

[karen1972]

So sorry for the rude comments, I can say I heard many similar ones... its unfortunately part of our society right now. Honestly I think it has to do with the fact most people would rather assume you "fell" into it rather than admit that they work at the same job as you, make the same income as you, and don't have two pennies to their name... ie since it can't be their fault for having no money it must be your fault by "cheating" the system somehow.

Jealousy is an ugly trait. Good luck in your next adventure, within a few days you will quickly forget all about this as you start your new adventure.

 

[FANOFJESUS]

Jealousy is a real problem nowadays.