You're so lucky - How do you respond?

[retire2020]

Everyone I know including family and friends think I'm crazy when there is a conversation about retirement, 529 plan, IRA, Roth IRA, paid off house, paying cash to buy new car and not having any credit card or any kind of debt. Most of them have no long term view and think saving couple of hundred thousands dollars is more than enough. They all live lavish life and blow their money whereas I LBYM. Later in the conversation they feel sorry for themselves and label me as I'm lucky that I've savings, no debt and retiring early is possible for me. They all think I'm rich and I earned and saved lots of money just by being lucky. What luck has to do with all this and how I'm lucky and they're not? It took me almost 30 years of hard work, lbym and disciplined savings to be where I'm today. It hurts and bugs me and I want to shout at them but I just mention what luck has to do with this, smile and walk away.
How would you react to conversation like this, what's the best way to answer and have a peace of mind?

 

[ls99]

Luck does favor the prepared.

 

[Bestwifeever]

Just smile and say thank you. You sort of were lucky to have the light bulb go off over your head about hard work and saving, and having health and time in a viable industry to achieve your goals. Congrats

 

[M Paquette]

"Luck is the result of preparation, planning, and seizing opportunities."
- Me

"Shallow men believe in luck or in circumstance. Strong men believe in cause and effect.”
― Ralph Waldo Emerson


“I'm a greater believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it."
― Thomas Jefferson


“People always call it luck when you’ve acted more sensibly than they have. ”
― Anne Tyler

 

[Nodak]

"Luck is the result of preparation, planning, and seizing opportunities."
- Me

"Shallow men believe in luck or in circumstance. Strong men believe in cause and effect.”
― Ralph Waldo Emerson


“I'm a greater believer in luck, and I find the harder I work the more I have of it."
― Thomas Jefferson


“People always call it luck when you’ve acted more sensibly than they have. ”
― Anne Tyler

Amen!

 

[akck]

I agree with just saying thanks. What irks me are the questions about how can they get there in 2 years or less (maybe not said, but implied). Most don't buy the save and invest over a long period.

 

[travelover]

Part of my progression in retirement is to quit giving a damn what other people think or say. I don't mean to be callous, but I bought my way out of slavery, so my obligation is fulfilled. They will have to find their own way.

 

[marks]

This is one of my favorite Robert A. Heinlein quotes:

"Throughout history, poverty is the normal condition of man. Advances which permit this norm to be exceeded — here and there, now and then — are the work of an extremely small minority, frequently despised, often condemned, and almost always opposed by all right-thinking people. Whenever this tiny minority is kept from creating, or (as sometimes happens) is driven out of a society, the people then slip back into abject poverty.
This is known as "bad luck.""

 

[Meadbh]

I say "Luck, years of study, and 33 years of hard work and careful financial management". That shuts them up pretty quickly.

 

[clifp]

I generally just smile and agree. At some level there is a significant level of luck. Although if they are being somewhat pushy or obnoxious I recite the ER motto of LYBM and making your own luck. I do love TJ's quote.

 

[cj]

I say "Luck, years of study, and 33 years of hard work and careful financial management". That shuts them up pretty quickly.

And that sums it up. Nicely said!

 

[Jack_Pine]

The more I practice the luckier I get.

- Pro Golfer

 

[bbbamI]

For the most part I smile and say thank you.

..but the demon in my mind says I should have a tee shirt made with this slogan...

 

[pb4uski]

I usually just concede that I have been lucky only because I know there is nothing that I can say that will cause their luck to increase (by saving more and spending less).

 

[W2R]

I know what it is like to desperately want to retire, and to despair of ever getting there. So do many of us. Compared with where I am now (blissfully retired), that is sheer h*ll.

Maybe I am wrong, but I think/assume that the misery of their condition and daily life and the exact same kind of despair is what causes people to say such things. They aren't thinking of us; they are thinking of their own misery.

I think to myself, "There, but for the Grace of G*d, go I. "

Then sadly listening, I can't help but think "The best laid plans of mice and men, gang aft a'gley. "

If we planned carefully, worked hard, delayed gratification, and implemented our plans, still we were lucky that the unexpected didn't ruin everything. In my case, not only was I lucky to have achieved my retirement plan and goals, and to have overcome the financial setbacks from Hurricane Katrina, but then after all of that I was lucky enough to finally get a promotion that I had given up on, and also to inherit a modest amount (which remains untouched, but still).

So, I just smile and try to gently encourage them to keep saving and trying, and that with luck they will eventually get there, too. Everybody needs a little kindness and encouragement sometimes, or so it seems to me.

 

[LOL!]

"Yes, I am lucky, thank you. Now go get some luck for yourself."

 

[retire2020]

"Yes, I am lucky, thank you. Now go get some luck for yourself."

I like this VERY much. I'll use it and have a peace of mind..

 

[mickeyd]

Luck has nothing to do with it.

 

[pb4uski]

Luck has nothing to do with it.

I agree with you, but many who are not in a position to retire don't see it that way since they are not willing to take ownership of their situation.

Since it hasn't happened to them, it must be bad luck.

 

[HFWR]

"Yes, I am lucky, thank you. Now go get some luck for yourself."

Go luck yourself...

 

[retire2020]

Go luck yourself...

Will not be able to say it though....

 

[daylatedollarshort]

We usually don't talk about money much with people offline outside our immediate family, so they have no reason to believe we are either lucky or unlucky.

 

[travelover]

Luck has nothing to do with it.

I was born a white, tall male in America and was able to start investing in the early 1980's - all luck. But others with the same luck did not take advantage of it the way I did.

 

[haha]

Everyone I know including family and friends think I'm crazy when there is a conversation about retirement, 529 plan, IRA, Roth IRA, paid off house, paying cash to buy new car and not having any credit card or any kind of debt. Most of them have no long term view and think saving couple of hundred thousands dollars is more than enough. They all live lavish life and blow their money whereas I LBYM. Later in the conversation they feel sorry for themselves and label me as I'm lucky that I've savings, no debt and retiring early is possible for me. They all think I'm rich and I earned and saved lots of money just by being lucky. What luck has to do with all this and how I'm lucky and they're not? It took me almost 30 years of hard work, lbym and disciplined savings to be where I'm today. It hurts and bugs me and I want to shout at them but I just mention what luck has to do with this, smile and walk away.
How would you react to conversation like this, what's the best way to answer and have a peace of mind?

If you want to have any friends, the best way and (likely the only) way to answer is "Wow, you got that right!" Rubbing people's noses in their failures relative to your success is never a good plan.

Ha

 

[retire2020]

Rubbing people's noses in their failures relative to your success is never a good plan.

Ha

Thanks. That's not and was never the intention. It's annoying everytime you hear the same thing and wanted to know how to handle the situation politely without getting angry.