Join Early Retirement Today
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Adjusting to ER
Old 09-06-2014, 02:28 PM   #1
Full time employment: Posting here.
jjquantz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Western Maryland
Posts: 926
Adjusting to ER

Last week was my first full week of ER. DW has said that she will no longer greet me with "How was your first Monday of retirement?" etc. She also brought to my attention that I probably don't need to rush around and eat breakfast so that I can have my bike gear on as she leaves for w*rk. I probably could take my time and enjoy the morning.

A second thing - for the last several years, reading has been something that occurred around the edges of everything else. So I would read on the Metro, read at lunch and read in bed before going to sleep. So, I fixed lunch the other day, sat down with a book and read for a while, finished up, put the plates in the dishwasher and went off and did something else. It didn't occur to me until much later that I COULD HAVE CONTINUED TO READ!

Anybody else have stories about little adjustments that took a while to make?
jjquantz is offline   Reply With Quote
Join the #1 Early Retirement and Financial Independence Forum Today - It's Totally Free!

Are you planning to be financially independent as early as possible so you can live life on your own terms? Discuss successful investing strategies, asset allocation models, tax strategies and other related topics in our online forum community. Our members range from young folks just starting their journey to financial independence, military retirees and even multimillionaires. No matter where you fit in you'll find that Early-Retirement.org is a great community to join. Best of all it's totally FREE!

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest so you have limited access to our community. Please take the time to register and you will gain a lot of great new features including; the ability to participate in discussions, network with our members, see fewer ads, upload photographs, create a retirement blog, send private messages and so much, much more!

Old 09-06-2014, 02:44 PM   #2
Moderator
MBAustin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2010
Posts: 7,925
Your experience sounds a lot like mine. I was just thinking this week about how I still have very definite M-F routines which are different from S-S routines and I'm not sure why - and this is nearly 4 years in.

The good news is that there is no right or wrong answer, and you can make it up as you go!
__________________
"One of the funny things about the stock market is that every time one person buys, another sells, and both think they are astute." William Feather
----------------------------------
ER'd Oct. 2010 at 53. Life is good.
MBAustin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-06-2014, 05:39 PM   #3
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
mpeirce's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2012
Location: Northern Ohio
Posts: 3,182
Quote:
Originally Posted by jjquantz View Post
A second thing - for the last several years, reading has been something that occurred around the edges of everything else. So I would read on the Metro, read at lunch and read in bed before going to sleep. So, I fixed lunch the other day, sat down with a book and read for a while, finished up, put the plates in the dishwasher and went off and did something else. It didn't occur to me until much later that I COULD HAVE CONTINUED TO READ!
When I was younger I read a lot. Then during the working/raising a family years I simply didn't have the time. Other things took priority over reading an enjoyable book.

So now one of my favorite activities is reading again.
mpeirce is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-06-2014, 06:39 PM   #4
Moderator
Walt34's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Eastern WV Panhandle
Posts: 25,299
One of the adjustments I had to make was the realization that I didn't have to be in a rush all the time. Dawdling while DW took "forever" to pick out a shirt or something didn't bother me anymore, more patience with slowpoke drivers, that sort of thing.

And yes, I read a lot.
__________________
When I was a kid I wanted to be older. This is not what I expected.
Walt34 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-06-2014, 06:47 PM   #5
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 281
Only in hindsight can I see just how many adjustments were made in my first year of FIRE. It is a hugh transition, and I suspect you may find yourself making adjustments and self discoveries for a long time to come.

I am now three years into ER, and am finally completely comfortable in my ER skin. And loving every bit of it.
RetiredAndFree is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-06-2014, 06:53 PM   #6
Full time employment: Posting here.
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Posts: 956
Yeah my first day I asked my wife, "What's for lunch?". She said, "I don't usually eat lunch".
48Fire is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-06-2014, 06:53 PM   #7
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
 
Join Date: Mar 2011
Posts: 8,362
I think that a job gives one a certain 'framework'; a structure of sorts and my first few weeks were disorienting. It took me about two full years to 'come down' and be 'me'.

From my perspective, people who still feel like they're on vacation haven't reached the full retirement mindset yet. After a (long) while, your life becomes the way you live ...without work being the reference point. THEN you're really retired!
__________________
Living well is the best revenge!
Retired @ 52 in 2005
marko is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-06-2014, 07:20 PM   #8
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 1,743
I retired in June and for the first couple of months we had a couple of domestic trips and when we didn't travel I was playing lots of tennis, we were going to the beach twice a week and the days were extremely busy and hectic. The last couple of weeks things got much slower for us and we felt that we no longer needed to be busy all the time to enjoy retirement. This week I spent hours relaxing at home watching the US open tennis matches and I enjoyed it. Meanwhile DW who is not a tennis fan spent her time reading and she enjoyed it as well.
Corporateburnout is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-06-2014, 07:38 PM   #9
Full time employment: Posting here.
jjquantz's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2014
Location: Western Maryland
Posts: 926
Quote:
Originally Posted by Corporateburnout View Post
I retired in June and for the first couple of months we had a couple of domestic trips and when we didn't travel I was playing lots of tennis, we were going to the beach twice a week and the days were extremely busy and hectic. The last couple of weeks things got much slower for us and we felt that we no longer needed to be busy all the time to enjoy retirement. This week I spent hours relaxing at home watching the US open tennis matches and I enjoyed it. Meanwhile DW who is not a tennis fan spent her time reading and she enjoyed it as well.
My situation will be similar, I think. This month I've got a pretty good list of deferred household chores that need to be addressed and then next month we are off for a celebratory vacation for 2+ weeks. Then, of course we'll be prepping for the holidays and then getting through the holidays. I suspect it will be into next year before I really settle down into ER as opposed to an "I'm on vacation" mindset.
jjquantz is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-06-2014, 07:47 PM   #10
Moderator
Walt34's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Eastern WV Panhandle
Posts: 25,299
Quote:
Originally Posted by Corporateburnout View Post
Meanwhile DW who is not a tennis fan spent her time reading and she enjoyed it as well.
We had a lot to do immediately after retiring since we had moved and bought a new house (neither of us gave a thought to the fact that it wouldn't have window shades or curtains - where we came from they usually convey with a "pre-owned" house since they're useless anywhere else anyway) since we'd never bought a new house before. So there was a lot to do but we had all day to do it in.

And we took advantage of that. I think it took about a year and a half to get the house the way we wanted it.
__________________
When I was a kid I wanted to be older. This is not what I expected.
Walt34 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-06-2014, 09:04 PM   #11
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Feb 2014
Location: South central PA
Posts: 3,469
I can't wait to adjust to ER.

4 workdays away from the high stress job. A part time lucrative gig that won't feel much like work. Then goodbye work!


Sent from my iPhone using Early Retirement Forum
EastWest Gal is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-06-2014, 09:22 PM   #12
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Posts: 7,746
It took me many months to say "F it, I'm just going to sit here and read for a few hours until I want to do something else". It was about six months before I fully adjusted to my "new reality". At 1 year in ER, I'm getting used to this life!
__________________
Retired in 2013 at age 33. Keeping busy reading, blogging, relaxing, gaming, and enjoying the outdoors with my wife and 3 kids (8, 13, and 15).
FUEGO is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-06-2014, 09:47 PM   #13
Moderator
Walt34's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Eastern WV Panhandle
Posts: 25,299
Quote:
Originally Posted by EastWest Gal View Post
I can't wait to adjust to ER
One of those rare instances when it's "all that it's cracked up to be".
__________________
When I was a kid I wanted to be older. This is not what I expected.
Walt34 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2014, 06:02 AM   #14
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
 
Join Date: Nov 2009
Posts: 6,682
Because I was working only 2 days a week for the 17 months prior to my ER, it wasn't a big adjustment to switch to working zero days a week. However, there was an adjustment period back in 2001 when I went from working full-time to working part-time in a mostly telecommuting gig. Back then, I had to get up early only 1 day a week, and 45 minutes later than for my full-time schedule. I had some weekdays free to do volunteer work and my local errands instead of doing them on the weekends. I had the time and energy to do stuff in the evenings again on weekdays which was nice. I had regained control over my personal life. THAT was an adjustment which was pretty easy (and nice) to get used to.
__________________
Retired in late 2008 at age 45. Cashed in company stock, bought a lot of shares in a big bond fund and am living nicely off its dividends. IRA, SS, and a pension await me at age 60 and later. No kids, no debts.

"I want my money working for me instead of me working for my money!"
scrabbler1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2014, 07:36 AM   #15
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: Oct 2013
Posts: 281
Do you know we still awake to an alarm clock most days because we tend to pack our days so full? (Two type A's that will likely go to the grave that way). The difference in ER is that we're actually happy about what lies ahead, rather than dreading it. And what a wonderful difference that is!
RetiredAndFree is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2014, 10:03 AM   #16
Moderator Emeritus
W2R's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: New Orleans
Posts: 47,473
Quote:
Originally Posted by RetiredAndFree View Post
Do you know we still awake to an alarm clock most days because we tend to pack our days so full? (Two type A's that will likely go to the grave that way). The difference in ER is that we're actually happy about what lies ahead, rather than dreading it. And what a wonderful difference that is!
After several years of ER without using an alarm clock at all, I seemed to develop a 25-26 hour day or else completely irregular hours. I awakened when I wanted to in the mornings, but still was groggy, half asleep, and cranky for a few hours after arising. So, 3-4 years after retiring I gave up and went back to using an alarm clock. My body thanks me as it does much better on a regular schedule. Awakening at a regular, expected time, is wonderful as my body is already speeding up and ready to get going when the alarm clock rings.

I use an alarm clock that plays sweet birdsongs to gently awaken me now, instead of that annoying "BLATTTTT!!" with which my old alarm clock awakened me for work. I set it early enough to watch the morning traffic reports on TV while I sit in my living room, relaxing and enjoying my coffee.

As for adjusting to ER, I no longer stay up half the night thinking "why should I go to bed? I'm retired and who's gonna make me?" Instead, I now think "Bedtime. Time to wind things up and I'll continue this in the morning." It's difficult to explain the difference in attitude, but this adjustment makes my life much more pleasant.
__________________
Already we are boldly launched upon the deep; but soon we shall be lost in its unshored, harbourless immensities. - - H. Melville, 1851.

Happily retired since 2009, at age 61. Best years of my life by far!
W2R is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2014, 10:10 AM   #17
Recycles dryer sheets
Sea Kayaker's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Vancouver/Gulf Islands/Baja
Posts: 479
Interesting comments regarding alarm clocks. I am bound and determined to mothball mine. My body seems to like to get up at around 6:30am, more than early enough to get a full day in. During my working life (I'm starting to use past tense already, even though I have 5 days left!) my alarm jarred me awake at 4:30am - for 24 years.

No alarm clock for me.
Sea Kayaker is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2014, 10:16 AM   #18
Moderator Emeritus
W2R's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: New Orleans
Posts: 47,473
Quote:
Originally Posted by Sea Kayaker View Post
Interesting comments regarding alarm clocks. I am bound and determined to mothball mine. My body seems to like to get up at around 6:30am, more than early enough to get a full day in. During my working life (I'm starting to use past tense already, even though I have 5 days left!) my alarm jarred me awake at 4:30am - for 24 years.

No alarm clock for me.
Yeah, my whole life I thought I was a morning person because I always had to get up early like that. On my days off, I'd happily arise at 7 AM after sleeping in. Imagine my surprise when I found out in retirement that I am NOT a morning person after all, and love being up in the middle of the night. On the other hand, I love mornings too. I finally settled on a time that is early enough that I don't miss the entire morning. But, I can still stay up pretty late too.
__________________
Already we are boldly launched upon the deep; but soon we shall be lost in its unshored, harbourless immensities. - - H. Melville, 1851.

Happily retired since 2009, at age 61. Best years of my life by far!
W2R is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2014, 10:26 AM   #19
Administrator
MichaelB's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Chicagoland
Posts: 40,585
I didn't use an alarm at work, and was always the first one in. We all react to stress differently, I did by waking up at 4:30 in the morning thinking about my day.

Now if I need to get up at some unreasonable hour or if I have an early morning appointment (that I was dumb enough to schedule) I'll use an alarm. Perhaps 2 or 3 times a year. The pleasure of a relaxed morning is beyond compare.
MichaelB is online now   Reply With Quote
Old 09-07-2014, 10:40 AM   #20
Recycles dryer sheets
Sea Kayaker's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: Vancouver/Gulf Islands/Baja
Posts: 479
MichaelB, I completely understand what you are saying. Although my alarm was set for 4:30am, the majority of the time I was already awake, like you, thinking and stressing about the day ahead.

That first Monday in which I wake up with my day as a complete blank canvas to do with as I please (this is no quasi-ER in which there are dad duties or such things) will be a magical thing - a thing I have dreamed of for the past 10 years.
Sea Kayaker is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
I'm having a hard time adjusting My Dream Life after FIRE 22 08-21-2007 07:32 AM
Adjusting withdrawals upwards walkinwood FIRE and Money 50 05-01-2007 09:26 PM
Adjusting Fire Calc for a mid year exit USK Coastie FIRE and Money 1 02-02-2007 10:26 AM
Net Worth - Adjusting for Taxes? GMueller FIRE and Money 35 07-31-2006 01:29 PM
Adjusting Firecalc for 72t distributions whw55 FIRE and Money 0 02-19-2006 07:15 AM

» Quick Links

 
All times are GMT -6. The time now is 01:13 PM.
 
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.