contact with former colleagues

[dixonge]

When we first attempted ER most of my coworkers were generally supportive and expressed genuine interest in keeping up with us on our blog. One intended to meet up with us while we were galavanting out on the road.

In the end, while a few seemed to have actually kept up with our blog or Facebook page, the interactions were minimal. The meetup on the road never materialized. When I went back for lunch or drinks the numbers dwindled each visit. I was a bit surprised since many of these people I considered more than just co-workers. We had spent time in each others' homes. However, I think the big lesson is that co-location is not a sufficient bond for friendship. Shared interests are, but working for the same employer at a nearby desk is not.

[easysurfer]

Pretty much a clean break.

After I FIRE'd we had planned a lunch but I had to postpone as I had to help out a friend in the ER so we rescheduled the lunch. Then when following up on the rescheduled lunch, the former colleagues had to postpone (too busy with deadlines at w*rk) so we pretty left the lunch as "Yes, we should get together sometime". That "sometime" never happened as the correspondence was feeling awkward. This was about 6 years ago.

[Nodak]

Quote:

Originally Posted by W2R Same is true at my former workplace, but my original plan was to call my supervisor and get someone to come down and escort me. That's pretty much what all the returning retirees did.

For some reason Cavalier AFS requires a written request with SS number several days in advance of requested visit. It may be due to the limited number of personnel available to do escort duty. They are planning an open house sometime this summer so I will take advantage of that to see what has changed in the last few years.

[W2R]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nodak For some reason Cavalier AFS requires a written request with SS number several days in advance of requested visit. It may be due to the limited number of personnel available to do escort duty. They are planning an open house sometime this summer so I will take advantage of that to see what has changed in the last few years.

Great idea! That should work out. I had forgotten but now recall that we DO have to submit a written request in advance with paperwork too. I don't know how far in advance.Seems kind of stupid when everyone knows you, and you're still on the gov't payroll, but I guess they are exercising an abundance of caution. Oh well. I'm in my 7th year of retirement by now, so I probably won't visit.

[Nodak]

Quote:

Originally Posted by W2R Great idea! That should work out. I had forgotten but now recall that we DO have to submit a written request in advance with paperwork too. I don't know how far in advance.Seems kind of stupid when everyone knows you, and you're still on the gov't payroll, but I guess they are exercising an abundance of caution. Oh well. I'm in my 7th year of retirement by now, so I probably won't visit.

It's been 9 years since I retired from DoD but I gave in to the request to consult for 3 years so it's been 6 years since I was in the building.

[dixonge]

Quote:

Originally Posted by W2R Same is true at my former workplace, but my original plan was to call my supervisor and get someone to come down and escort me. That's pretty much what all the returning retirees did.

On my first return visit the department had moved to a new building. A co-worker met me at the elevator, then secreted me into a hallway. As it turns out, they were arranging a prank and I was the secret ingredient. One of my former 'team leads' (one who never liked me) was told he was interviewing someone to fill a position. Then they had me walk into the conference room while they stood at the door to see his reaction. I have to admit I quite enjoyed that...

[JDARNELL]

I keep in touch with a few from time to time. As time goes on less and less. They are grappling with their exit strategies. I did attend a Labor Day BBQ with about 20 of my former colleagues. Some were happy that I had moved on and wanted to know how I did it. Others were in shock and said I was too young. It was the first time I had felt weird about it since I left 17 months ago. Then as I got to thinking more about it it is their issue not mine.

[jjquantz]

As usual, I'm a little late to the party...

My situation might be a little different. DW and I socialize regularly with 2 former co-workers of mine. These young ladies were my subordinates in a couple of different organizations and so I ended up doing a fair amount of mentoring and they eventually moved on to other organizations with greater responsibilities. What has happened is that these two have become what DW jokingly refers to as our "adopted daughters". Their ages are right between the ages of our 2 daughters and they get along great with our kids. So, we see these folks and their spouses several times a year and it's really like an extended family get together. Similarly, DW keeps in close touch with some of her former subordinates from her previous job.

As far as our peers from those previous positions, not so much as a peep. Don't know why, but we just seem to connect better with the generation that's younger than us than with our "fellow" baby boomers. Actually, come to think of it, we also have some good friends who are just older than the baby boom generation, but only a couple of friends within a few years of our age. I'll have to ponder that.

[jjquantz]

Quote:

Originally Posted by dixonge On my first return visit the department had moved to a new building. A co-worker met me at the elevator, then secreted me into a hallway. As it turns out, they were arranging a prank and I was the secret ingredient. One of my former 'team leads' (one who never liked me) was told he was interviewing someone to fill a position. Then they had me walk into the conference room while they stood at the door to see his reaction. I have to admit I quite enjoyed that...

Love it! Wish I had been there.

[FUEGO]

I kept up with a few for a year or two after quitting. Right now I don't hear from any former colleagues very often other than from one guy that I'm friends with. Just heard from him (begging me to go to work for his company part time/temp/whatever) and we're having lunch next week.

We've already discussed the opportunity and I've expressed my disinterest; lunch is just friendship and social. We get together 1-2x per year normally. Sometimes lunch, sometimes hang out at his place.

Otherwise I don't think I've done more than chat on facebook very casually with former coworkers. I just never had a lot in common with most coworkers to form any kind of relationship outside the office.

[target2019]

My peer group at work was usually small. From the last megacorp job, I maintain contact with a few colleagues. Mostly entertainment value, as we exchange juicy links and unbelievable pictures through IM. Most of it is family friendly. Has been a year since we hoisted a few...

[Options]

I was close to my former boss, and we did keep in contact/have lunch last year, but this year we seem to just play phone tag. I've recently begun to think it's time to move on anyway as my thoughts are elsewhere now. I'll probably just play it by ear.

[harley]

Wow! I would never have thought that I'd be one of the most social people regarding work colleagues. As I said previously, I have 4 people that I met at work who have become close friends that I talk to weekly and visit with often even though we've moved away from where I used to work. And I've got 3 others that I talk to probably monthly, and do things with occasionally, like twice/year or so. I may have been more tied to my job socially than I ever realized. It still wasn't hard to walk away from the vast majority of them, never to think of them again. But I probably have more lifetime friends from work than from any other part of my life (church, school, community, etc.). I'm surprised more of you don't. It's where I, at least, spent a majority of my time for about 25 years. Of course, these are all people I had much more in common with than just work. Music, camping, other activities.

[Fedup]

No not really. I like to live life like a hermit. But seriously my close friends have always been my spouse and my families. Work friends are always acquaintances.


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[foxfirev5]

6 days to go until ER and I'm planning a clean break. It was a great 36 year run but all of the old timers are gone and it's time for a change. Combine that with the fact that my career has been in the field far from any office or close daily encounters.

[aaronc879]

I left work suddenly almost 5 years ago after 11+ years at the same employer. I haven't seen any of my former co-workers since the day I left. There were about 8-9 people I worked with every day and another 30+ that I worked with occasionally and I haven't seen a single one of them in the 5 years since I left. I never exchanged contact info with any of them so no way to get in touch.

[eytonxav]

Keep in touch with a few via email, some to the house for dinner, some via Facebook, many via LinkedIn, and meet regularly with a few for BBQ dinner every couple of months. Some of these folks I've know since he 70s. Its still enjoyable to reminice about old times, as well as discuss current events.

[MBAustin]

I had expected to be more in touch with former colleagues and did talk on the phone with a few in the first several months, but that quickly trickled down to a handful of exchanges on LinkedIn and FB. I have had lunch a couple of times with one colleague who was looking for some help in changing jobs. And I do go back to the office once a week for a yoga class that I've been doing off and on for about 15 years. Only two who still work there are in the class, and hearing the latest MegaCorp craziness just reinforces what a great decision I made to ER when I did.

[YVRRocketSurgery]

Work world is there, family world is here, friend world is over there and these worlds shall rarely collide.

I have a great relationship with my colleagues at work but apart from mingling during the odd non-work, work events like volunteering, sports pools, after work meal/drinks, showing an out of town colleague around town, we don't socialize much outside of work. Kind of horrible but I barely keep up with people that have only transferred out of my department unless our projects intersect. The only thing I can see myself continuing after retirement is some of the volunteering events.

And of the colleagues that have already retired, I only hear from them when they want to hit me up for a donation for some charity they are working on.

[Rosie]

Quote:

Originally Posted by medved Do those of you who retired early tend to keep in regular touch with your former business/professional colleagues?

Oh Hail No. Once I retired I realized I had nothing in common with most of my coworkers, outside of the job. Well, I am still in touch with a couple of them, but all it amounts to is a very occasional lunch or dinner and sporadic facebook contact.

Quote:

Also, do you think the adjustment to retirement tends to be easier for those who move to a new place after retirement, or those who stay put for some time?

In my case, I'd say the former. I was retired for a couple of years before DH and I moved. Once we moved a few hours away, far removed from my commute and all my old worklife locales, that's when I felt my retirement officially began.