Do you miss being front and center

[Major Tom]

Tom, please say something so we can see if we recognize you.

That used to happen quite often. There was a certain tagline (positioning statement) at the end of the commercials which folk would ask me to say, then burst out laughing when they saw the voice they recognized coming from the guy standing in front of them.

Occasionally, I'd be in a store or somewhere else, and someone would say "You sound like the ****** guy." It was kind of fun saying, "That's because I am!"

 

[robnplunder]

I don't miss it. I was an engineering director of a mega (I mean MEGA) corp and led about 50 employees. I enjoyed being recognized as a fair, respected leader but sometimes I felt like I am standing in a front of a firing squad. The job came with a lot of responsibility. To add, I had a psychopath boss & a peer who did anything and everything to get ahead. The stress of lowering myself to them was too much and I retired a year or two ahead of when I really want to retire.

 

[Options]

Miss it? My gosh no. In my career I was in a unique position to learn everything about what organizational life purports to be as opposed to what it really is (and grew to despise the hypocrisy as a result).

OTOH, in the sewer of organizational leadership, I always panned for and found gold. I was lucky enough to meet and work with some very, very wonderful people, some I've known almost 20 years. I seem to have collected what I considered to be some of the dearest human beings over time, and many are still friends. I just got an Xmas card from a colleague 13 years ago who became a dear friend, and another colleague and his wife who I worked with 5 years ago. I wouldn't trade all those relationships for anything.

 

[timemoveson]

My BIL was a Senior Tax Partner for KPMG for years in central California. As a partner, the policy was that at age 60, you are gone to make room for the new ones. Of course, at his level, money was not an issue when leaving. He still does wealth management consulting at age 70. He just won't quit.

Aja, I'm sure you know your BIL's situation and hopefully at 60 he was FI and is working because he wants to (or perhaps doesn't have anything else to do, at least in his mind). However, I know and know of, literally, many hundreds of similar senior professional people that are peers of your BIL, across North America. I can tell you that many of them are in deep and cannot retire at 60 and must continue working to feed the machine they have scaled up. Smart, very highly paid people in ownership positions, but on a treadmill. All the reasons readers of this forum would expect, just on steroids.

 

[gauss]

I have gotten involved with several volunteer activities that challenge me in that regard.

The beauty is that in the volunteer world, you can control how much you choose to take on as opposed to having someone at work "assign" it to you.

-gauss

 

[bearkeley]

This was my biggest concern when I retired last year at the age of 47. I was able to promote a lot of my employees before I left and had a role in selecting my successor, but I stared to feel a little left out when I was training / transitioning out and worried I was making a mistake. I had the best job and making the most money I ever made....did I make the wrong decision?

It's been a year and surprisingly, don't miss it all! I find it extremely interesting that strangers always ask my husband (who just retired a few months ago at the age of 49) what he did for a living, but almost always never bother to ask me, but surprisingly, I actually enjoy not being front and center in my new life

 

[street]

I don't miss it either. It is so interesting there is one guy I worked with that lives to be on top and be noticed. lol He will never retire because he won't no how. It will kill him not having the power and being front and center. At some point you have realize there are people that can do your job and d it better.

 

[robnplunder]

One thing to warn against ER wannabees who were in power position ... don't carry that stuff back to your retirement. I.e., don't act like a boss. It's a hard habit to break, and you may not even know that you are always acting like an alpha male (or female). Once you RE'd, you are just another tree in a forest.

 

[travelover]

One thing to warn against ER wannabees who were in power position ... don't carry that stuff back to your retirement. I.e., don't act like a boss. It's a hard habit to break, and you may not even know that you are always acting like an alpha male (or female). Once you RE'd, you are just another tree in a forest.

I love running into my old work "superiors" and seeing the look on their faces when they realize they are just another person in my world.

 

[NW-Bound]

I was never in front or at the center, though I had my share of 5 minutes of fame. I chose to follow the technical ladder instead of the management ladder at megacorp for advancement.

What I miss is the fun of designing and building something and seeing it work. And I sometimes miss the income. I am slowly getting over it.

 

[robnplunder]

I love running into my old work "superiors" and seeing the look on their faces when they realize they are just another person in my world.

Imagine their surprise when they realize you are their equal.

 

[Dash man]

I was in the technical side of things too with no direct reports. Probably made more than many managers though. The only "power" I had was my in depth knowledge of our systems. They seem to have survived without me as I expected. I loved the shock on their faces when I retired. They couldn't believe I would leave at age 56 when most of them were worried about layoffs.

 

[travelover]

Imagine their surprise when they realize you are their equal.

It is better than that. I am financially independent, many of them are still in the yoke.

 

[marko]

I was beat down the last few years to the point I really didn't care. Still took a couple of years to separate me from the career. Now who cares?

Sitting here thinking breakfast sounds good. Finish my coffee and watch it snow on Christmas morning. Have a warm dog on my lap. Life's good.

+1
I was EVP of a large tech company; 1800 reports. Loved every minute of it but over the last few years before I RE'd, we had lost our soul to the accountants. I was glad to leave. It wasn't the company I'd helped build.

Oh, and a mid-7 figure severance helped too.

Like MRG, life is soooo much better now.

 

[pb4uski]

We have made a lot of new friends in our lives as retirees. What is very interesting is that nobody really cares what you did before or the job status that you had. We are all equals and just trying to have fun together. Former CEO or plumber, the golf course treats you equally.

 

[Backpacker]

I down shifted to part time, from being number two. Still being in the company I get to see my replacement make decisions that I used to. Having played a great part in the success of the company, some days it's hard to watch and not be consulted, but I just remind myself that I don't have any cash ownership in the company, nor any pension that depends on their success. We are FI so could walk anytime, makes it pretty easy to sit back and chuckle, instead of having regrets.

 

[Racer X]

I was able to transition when I retired because I run things at home. The vacuum, the lawnmower, the hedge trimmer, the dishwasher.....

I also still have to report to the household COO (DW) and VP of Security (cat)

 

[donheff]

I was a Federal senior executive for the last 15 years of my career. Interesting work but constant hassles and pressure that I don't miss. Like others have said, no one talks much about their former work when retired except briefly when they bump into someone they knew or who worked in a related job.

 

[HadEnuff]

No, I do not miss it all. I wasn't in charge of a lot of people, but I was responsible for running my dental practice, so in addition to the responsibility of making decisions about diagnosis and treatment all day long, there was the responsibility of running the business.
Employee issues, state and federal regulations of all sorts. Equipment issues. on and on.

DW is still working for the new doc (2 more months!!!) and she comes home and starts talking about these issues and my eyes glaze over and I'm so darn happy "it's not my problem"....happy dance...
Nope, don't miss that at all.

 

[Ginny]

I sold my law practice this fall and I struggle with feelings of being irrelevant, which is not rational as I have a DH, friends, hobbies and grandkids. My clients loved me (really!) and all that positive input is gone. I am struggling with feelings of not being important too, but that is a double edged sword. I am shifting into being relaxed, but it is difficult.

One of the main reasons I wanted to retire is to combat 36 years of sitting and typing. Yup, working out 5 days a week and am grateful to be done with working!!!

 

[Dawg52]

I was a back room bean counter. Never front and center.

 

[Danmar]

I sold my law practice this fall and I struggle with feelings of being irrelevant, which is not rational as I have a DH, friends, hobbies and grandkids. My clients loved me (really!) and all that positive input is gone. I am struggling with feelings of not being important too, but that is a double edged sword. I am shifting into being relaxed, but it is difficult.

One of the main reasons I wanted to retire is to combat 36 years of sitting and typing. Yup, working out 5 days a week and am grateful to be done with working!!!

I understand how you feel. It took me probably about 3 years to get my identity back. During that period I was a real "jerk" to DW DD and others. Easy for people to say. "Don't tie your identity up in your career" but to be successful in your career that is often necessary and inescapable. I believe in the overall scheme of things it was well worth it and in retrospect probably wouldn't do things much differently.

 

[Lstansbury]

I missed the comraderie and and the challenges and biweekly Cha Ching of money dropping into the account that didn't come from my nest eggs. I didn't know who I was anymore. It was freaky. And a 7000 dental surprise not covered by insurance and being ripped off by financial institution to the degree that the CFPB sent me a check from a legal settlement that at least covered some of my losses... well all that didn't help. I missed work so much I went back within 45 days to an easy no stress gig with former colleagues. And I have a consulting side gig. All the reading and living on the "retirement budget" trial runs didn't even come close to giving me the reality check that time in 2014 gifted me. I'm approaching early retirement again in 2017 but am planning it differently. Last time I flounced out of an awful political situation with a big third finger salute. This time I will go toward something positive and structured rather than running away from BS. Plus, I will carry extra dental insurance and budget an extra 10 percent for life surprises.

 

[athena53]

There's always volunteer and community activities. I stayed active in Toastmasters because I really like speaking in front of an audience. I'm also President and could get WAY more involved if I wanted to. I'm on the HOA Board and have a couple of leadership activities in my church (another area where I could find plenty more if I wanted). I do miss flying Business Class from London to Bangalore upstairs on a 747 and the lovely hotel where I stayed in Bangalore, hanging out in London or Zurich with colleagues, etc.- but that came at a cost of having to set my alarm clock and having to sit through way too many PowerPoint presentations while pretending I was interested. I'd had enough.

 

[kcowan]

+1
I was EVP of a large tech company; 1800 reports. Loved every minute of it but over the last few years before I RE'd, we had lost our soul to the accountants...

I held various executive management positions for 20 years. I enjoyed the feeling of contribution and leverage more than the power. What I resented was the fascination of all my organization with personal aspects of my life. It was especially bad when I was a CEO (or maybe I was more sensitive to it by then).

But my life plan was about working and then not working. Hopefully both 30 years each. 30 working done, 30 retired (14 down, 16 to go).

*The year my Dad retired, my Mom died of cancer. So I vowed to not repeat that mistake!