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Old 12-05-2015, 12:45 PM   #41
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..........I don't think any of us can have a real understanding of OP's situation based on the description he gave............
No, but it sure is fun to project and speculate.
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Old 12-05-2015, 02:20 PM   #42
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1) ...

3) Why do you have to pay for college for your kids? If they studied and did well in high school, they should be eligible for assistance with tuition. There is likely a local college where they can do the first couple of years of the basics. Calculus I to III at Podunk state really isn't that much different than Calculus I to III at MIT. They can live at home those years and save a ton on housing. I am sure they will complain, but kids today complain when they don't get the correct color I-phone for their birthday. They will get over it.
Not DS' experience. He went to second tier in-state university for two years. Completed all calculus, linear algebra, etc. He breezed through the math and got As. The big in-state engineering university accepted all courses. Only trouble was the engineering school within the engineering university did not accept any of his math courses. He took them all over again! He had to really study when he took them the second time.
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Old 12-05-2015, 02:26 PM   #43
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Not DS' experience. He went to second tier in-state university for two years. Completed all calculus, linear algebra, etc. He breezed through the math and got As. The big in-state engineering university accepted all courses. Only trouble was the engineering school within the engineering university did not accept any of his math courses. He took them all over again! He had to really study when he took them the second time.
Well, this was not my experience or the experience of my wife and several coworkers. I took Calculus I to III while in high school (attended the local college my senior year) and all of the math was accepted by the big engineering school.
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Old 12-05-2015, 03:04 PM   #44
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Well, this was not my experience or the experience of my wife and several coworkers. I took Calculus I to III while in high school (attended the local college my senior year) and all of the math was accepted by the big engineering school.
This has been our experience, too. Our state has a transfer program from the junior colleges to public 4 years with guaranteed transfer credit and graduation in 4 years if the student stays on contract. Many of the Fortune 500 companies and hot tech companies here hire from the public 4 year schools. Apple recruits heavily from San Jose State. I don't know about every field but here in the Bay Area, according to Indeed.com, the average Python programmer makes well over $100K, which I would consider a very good salary, and a student could probably learn Python and related skills at many of the state colleges or universities.
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Old 12-05-2015, 04:44 PM   #45
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This has been our experience, too. Our state has a transfer program from the junior colleges to public 4 years with guaranteed transfer credit and graduation in 4 years if the student stays on contract. Many of the Fortune 500 companies and hot tech companies here hire from the public 4 year schools. Apple recruits heavily from San Jose State. I don't know about every field but here in the Bay Area, according to Indeed.com, the average Python programmer makes well over $100K, which I would consider a very good salary, and a student could probably learn Python and related skills at many of the state colleges or universities.
Shout out! SJSU grad here, Class of '88.

In reality, I think if you are looking at a *terminal* four year program a degree from San Jose State (and hundreds of other institutions) is as solid as those with a top-tier rep. In the "top tier" schools, the most esteemed faculty are teaching grad students and/or doing research and have little contact with undergrads in many cases. In those schools undergrads are likely to be taught by grad students or adjunct faculty rather than full-time tenured PhD professors.

Granted, if you want to go to a top grad school, or for post-graduate studies in a professional field like medicine or law, or if you want to be employed in a place where you need a professional or post-baccalaureate degree -- "pedigree" matters a lot -- even if the underlying undergrad education may not be all that superior. THAT is where the snob appeal of "the right school" really matters.
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Old 12-05-2015, 04:52 PM   #46
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44 replies to the newbie OP who appears to have disappeared.
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Old 12-05-2015, 04:57 PM   #47
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44 replies to the newbie OP who appears to have disappeared.
But we've hijacked it, so if the OP objects they can reappear to express their indignation!
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Old 12-05-2015, 04:59 PM   #48
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But we've hijacked it, so if the OP objects they can reappear to express their indignation!
So true.
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Old 12-05-2015, 05:09 PM   #49
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You didn't think he would come back after reading the responses did you?
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Old 12-05-2015, 05:16 PM   #50
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Pretty sure he didn't stay long enough to even read a response.

I'm waiting to post my thoughts until he returns with more information, or until Mrs Newby Poster returns in his place (I am imagining him leaving his computer on with this thread open after he started it --oh, the hijinks at their house!) to tell us more.
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Old 12-05-2015, 05:19 PM   #51
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Shout out! SJSU grad here, Class of '88.

In reality, I think if you are looking at a *terminal* four year program a degree from San Jose State (and hundreds of other institutions) is as solid as those with a top-tier rep. In the "top tier" schools, the most esteemed faculty are teaching grad students and/or doing research and have little contact with undergrads in many cases. In those schools undergrads are likely to be taught by grad students or adjunct faculty rather than full-time tenured PhD professors.

Granted, if you want to go to a top grad school, or for post-graduate studies in a professional field like medicine or law, or if you want to be employed in a place where you need a professional or post-baccalaureate degree -- "pedigree" matters a lot -- even if the underlying undergrad education may not be all that superior. THAT is where the snob appeal of "the right school" really matters.
+1. If your kid wants to be a Supreme Court Justice, San Jose State might not be the best path. And even with some tech companies, a name school matters, though Berkeley and UCLA are usually ranked pretty high on most best college lists and both are public schools. Community college transfers make up 20% of the undergrads at Berkeley.
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Old 12-05-2015, 05:28 PM   #52
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+1. And even with some tech companies, a name school matters, though Berkeley and UCLA are usually ranked pretty high on most best college lists and both are public schools.
Also very difficult to get into.

Ha
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Old 12-05-2015, 05:30 PM   #53
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44 replies to the newbie OP who appears to have disappeared.
I think it's a little early to say he "disappeared". He may have been at work all day and have a job that requires him to actually work. He may not be able to read and respond until later tonight. Back when I was working full time I had at least 13 hours every day that I didn't have any access to internet.
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Old 12-05-2015, 05:33 PM   #54
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I think it's a little early to say he "disappeared". He may have been at work all day and have a job that requires him to actually work.
More likely his DW knocked him upside the head with a rolling pin and he's still unconscious.
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Old 12-05-2015, 05:34 PM   #55
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More likely his DW knocked him upside the head with a rolling pin and he's still unconscious.
Also a possibility.
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Old 12-05-2015, 05:37 PM   #56
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More likely his DW knocked him upside the head with a rolling pin and he's still unconscious.
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Old 12-05-2015, 06:03 PM   #57
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I have a sneaking suspicion that this is not 100% about money or who is working vs who is not.

I would recommend a very open discussion with your wife about all the aspects of your marriage from her point of view and yours.

My guess is that there are a number of struggles going on and they are surfacing with the "won't work" issue.

I could be wrong though.

Either way I wish you luck. It sounds like a painful situation.


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Old 12-05-2015, 07:03 PM   #58
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As the OP has abandoned his thread, this has become no man's land. Everything goes, right?

Next up, some recipes, plus some Polish folk music.

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+1. If your kid wants to be a Supreme Court Justice, San Jose State might not be the best path. And even with some tech companies, a name school matters, though Berkeley and UCLA are usually ranked pretty high on most best college lists and both are public schools. Community college transfers make up 20% of the undergrads at Berkeley.
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Also very difficult to get into.

Ha
I am not up-to-date on the situation and not even a resident of CA, but I read a while back about a local student not getting admitted to any higher-tier school despite having a 4.0GPA and a good SAT score. The article blamed it on the schools reserving some slots to admit foreign students, particularly from China, who paid full-fare tuition and fees.
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Old 12-05-2015, 07:21 PM   #59
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NWbound - it is definitely much harder to get into a UC school these days. Most of my neighbor's kids and kids' friends "plan" to go to UCSD since it is just a few miles away. They're finding out it's not as easy as when my generation applied to college. For example - I was a B+ average student with very high SAT scores. I was accepted to UC Berkeley. No way I could get in these days... at least not into one of the more sought after degree programs.

A friend's son applied to UCSD last year - straight A's, AP classes out the wazoo (so a GPA much higher than 4.0 because the AP classes are weighted), and a near perfect SAT. He also did volunteer work and played in the HS Band. He did the bio-tech program at the local high school... All things that should ensure he made it in. He applied pre-med and didn't get in. He's going to one of the other UC schools (UCSF IIRC). The number of foreign students is over 30%. They all pay full out of state tuition plus an extra fee for being from another country.

You could argue that they are taking the "spots" from the local kids - but truthfully, for the competitive majors at the top schools the best and brightest from other countries are going to beat out the "above average" kids. The best and brightest local kids still make it in. College has gotten more competitive at the UC schools in the sought after majors.
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Old 12-05-2015, 07:26 PM   #60
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You could argue that they are taking the "spots" from the local kids - but truthfully, for the competitive majors at the top schools the best and brightest from other countries are going to beat out the "above average" kids. The best and brightest local kids still make it in. College has gotten more competitive at the UC schools in the sought after majors.
I'm going to call it what it essentially is: college admissions have become an "arms race". It doesn't matter how good you are, if others are perceived to be better, you have to do something, *anything*, to find a way to one-up them. And so it is with ambitious kids (or more often, kids of ambitious parents) today -- 3.9 isn't good enough -- heck, 4.5 isn't good enough where advanced placement and honors courses give you an extra grade point for a C or better. Oh, and there are the loads of required structured extracurriculars and the community service -- gotta look better than Jimmy or Susie across town! -- and kids bound for the "best" colleges seem a lot more robbed of a fun, carefree childhood than my generation or my parents' generation did....
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