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Old 02-02-2016, 11:38 AM   #61
Recycles dryer sheets
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I like your let it go theme. So simple and yet so true! ��

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Old 02-04-2016, 10:41 AM   #62
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I worked in the IT industry. We downsized for 20 years and went through three mergers. I know all about downsizing and selecting those to be downsized. Not good. It was simply a phase of an industry moving towards commoditization, lower margins, and all the rest that it brings.

I got lucky. Downsized in management, ready for it, and wanting it. My issue was hiding my joy until the lawyer worked out a proper separation with my employer.

The thing to remember is that this is not personal and not a reflection on you. So make the best of your good fortune and move forward. You may not realize it now, but in a few months you may look at this from a very different perspective.

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Old 02-04-2016, 11:06 AM   #63
Recycles dryer sheets
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Originally Posted by aggie76 View Post
My question to ya'll. How many of you have been "retired in a manner not of your choosing ? How LONG did it take to get over the ANGER and the SHAME ! Did long before you got out of your morning FUNK when you get up and realize that for the FIRST time since EVER ( I've worked or been in a classroom ALL my life) you have nothing you have to do ?
I left my employer of 26 years via voluntary retirement (I was eligible) after I got in a pissing contest with a higher level manager over a work assignment that consisted of a 6 month detail to another part of the country. I could tell you all the sordid details ... but it doesn't really matter.

I had planned to work at least a few more years .... but when I hit my retirement eligibility date I told myself if I have 3 bad days in a row I would put my papers in. Well .... it didn't take 6 months for those "3 bad days in a row" to come along.

Anyways ... there was a lot of bad blood over it. Took me a couple of years to get past it. Time wasted. My advice .... put it behind you as soon as possible. Not everything goes as you imagined it would.
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Old 02-04-2016, 11:52 AM   #64
Recycles dryer sheets
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Originally Posted by aggie76 View Post
My question to ya'll. How many of you have been "retired in a manner not of your choosing ? How LONG did it take to get over the ANGER and the SHAME ! Did long before you got out of your morning FUNK when you get up and realize that for the FIRST time since EVER ( I've worked or been in a classroom ALL my life) you have nothing you have to do ?
I've been ER'd about a year. Left a j*b I hated for the last few years, but it was going downhill for several years. It was an engineering & manufacturing gig, with tons of outsourcing and off-shoring. I spent my career training my replacements. I saw this starting 2 decades ago when I started as a college kid and the old-timers, guys in their 50's, get canned. It was ugly and I was determined not to undergo their fate, and I started saving & planning for an exit in my 50's.

Fast forward two decades and the political BS, formerly the purview of upper management, now infiltrated the everyday lives of even the working folks. I reached my savings target and jumped out before being thrown out. A severance package would have been nice, but there is something to be said for determining my own destiny. Hard to put a price on that...

As to your question, even a year later I feel some amount of anger and residual shame about the "could have, should have". Still a bit angry about the unnecessary crap I endured. Still regret that I didn't handle it better... Still have nightmares about w*rk almost weekly. I'm gradually healing and learning to be good to myself and those I love a little more each week. It's a process I expect to take years, maybe longer.

The good news is that I have started the healing journey and you and many here have too, although it may not seem like it at this early and painful stage.

As to the second part of the question, I have remained just as focussed and goal-oriented in retirement as I did when w*rking. This gives me purpose and "something to do". I have longer range goals (cost reduction, tax efficiency, ACA subsidy maximization, estate planning), mid range goals (yearly budget, safe withdrawal rate, learning to weld, greater involvement at church), and daily goals (Thai food tonight!). These are all written down with deadlines and schedules, just like at w*rk. This may be too much for some folks, but it works for me. Living well is my new full-time job! I hope that you too may learn to discover where you want to be and learn to get there over time.

Happy Trails!

Living the dream...
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Forcibly "retired"
Old 02-04-2016, 06:43 PM   #65
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Forcibly "retired"

Sorry to hear about company giving you the shaft. I also got forcibly retired from my company of 25 years of loyal and profitable employment.

It will take time for you to get over your anger. I am not completely over my anger, it has been five years since I was forcibly retired.

The good news is my forced retirement was the best thing that ever happened. I now play golf 3-4 days a week, see my grandkids almost every day. I also do service club volunteer work and more involved with church committees.

I now feel sorry for my company comrades left behind at my former company. I also take great pleasure in thinking a good FU*k you thought to former employer management.

Congrats on the start of the best time of your life!!


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