Join Early Retirement Today
Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 03-06-2018, 06:06 PM   #161
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
 
Join Date: Jun 2017
Location: Chicagoland
Posts: 1,127
Quote:
Originally Posted by pj.mask View Post
There is an inverse correlation between cost of wedding and how long it lasts.
Great point. Went to the wedding of a niece. It was a huge wedding and it was held at one of Chicago's best hotels. I can only imagine what the cost was.

The marriage lasted less than a year.
CoolRich59 is offline   Reply With Quote
Join the #1 Early Retirement and Financial Independence Forum Today - It's Totally Free!

Are you planning to be financially independent as early as possible so you can live life on your own terms? Discuss successful investing strategies, asset allocation models, tax strategies and other related topics in our online forum community. Our members range from young folks just starting their journey to financial independence, military retirees and even multimillionaires. No matter where you fit in you'll find that Early-Retirement.org is a great community to join. Best of all it's totally FREE!

You are currently viewing our boards as a guest so you have limited access to our community. Please take the time to register and you will gain a lot of great new features including; the ability to participate in discussions, network with our members, see fewer ads, upload photographs, create a retirement blog, send private messages and so much, much more!

Old 03-06-2018, 06:10 PM   #162
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
NYEXPAT's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: Miraflores,Peru
Posts: 1,992
Quote:
Originally Posted by oneill225 View Post
You made me laugh out loud.

I am dumbfounded by expensive weddings like I am dumbfounded by young couples buying mini-mansions and new BMWs in their 20s. It is all foolish status signaling in my mind.

Like most on this site, we saved in our younger years so that we could enjoy not working in our older years.

My three daughters will each get around $5,000 from us to spend however they want towards a wedding. It will be our last lesson in frugality for them.

By the way, I don't care how much you spend on a wedding, no one enjoys them (including the bride and groom who are totally stressed out and just want to get to the honeymoon).
My Daughter got married this past September, outdoor wedding in Telluride.
When she told me she was getting married I spent 7k to fly my family to Denver (for two days) to meet her Fiance. While their, she proceeded to tell me that my ex-wife had filed bankruptcy and my childhood home (she got in Divorce) worth a million dollars was now in foreclosure. She then asked If I would help her pay for the wedding. I agreed to pay a third and she was very happy. When the time came, I told her that I thought it would be better if I did not show up with my young wife and new family as it was sure to take away attention from her special day and possibly result in my incarceration.

I think she was relieved, the night before her wedding, I wrote her a long heartfelt letter and told her that as a wedding present I had just arranged for her to receive the other two thirds of the wedding cost as well as a Honeymoon trip with us to Machu Picchu.
NYEXPAT is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2018, 04:48 AM   #163
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
bclover's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: philly
Posts: 1,219
Quote:
Originally Posted by Moemg View Post
I do not think $100 is out of line especially if it includes liquor .My SO's son is getting married in two weeks and the rehearsal dinner is $75 a plate not including tax and room rental fee.
Absolutely. Now I'm in a large east coast city so prices tend to be higher. For my family of 4 a dinner at the Cheesecake factory is easily going to run 200 bucks with no alcohol and that's a chain restaurant.

My 4 friends and I went to the theater and dinner, Sullivans steakhouse, tab $575.00 we did have wine but that's pretty routine.

I got married 33 years ago in Manhattan, 225 guest and 95% of them family, no way was I getting out of having a cheap wedding. so the 20K we spent in 1985 would have equated to darn near 40K in todays dollars.

So if someone told me they were dropping 25K today on a wedding here in Philly, it would not be considered lavish by any stretch of the imagination.

My son's wedding set me back 10K and that was what I contributed and the only thing I really think was "extravegant" was the band.
__________________
My darling girl, when are you going to realize that being "normal" is not necessarily a virtue? it sometimes rather denotes a lack of courage~Aunt Francis
bclover is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2018, 08:18 AM   #164
gone traveling
 
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: Greenville
Posts: 653
My first wedding in 1988 was about $10k. My (now Ex) FIL told me "If you guys get divorced before 10 years, you have to pay me back!". I told him "Deal, but prorated only!"

We were divorced with about 3 months to the 10 year mark. I sent him a check for $250 with a note in the memo section "Worth every penny". He never cashed it.
Pilot2013 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2018, 08:29 AM   #165
Recycles dryer sheets
Nightcap's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2012
Location: Brewster
Posts: 367
I was surprised to be invited to a niece's rehearsal dinner. The groom's family, though, seemed particularly well-off, so perhaps that was part of it.
Nightcap is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2018, 10:44 AM   #166
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Teacher Terry's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 7,001
I have never spent 50/person at the Cheesecake Factory without alcohol. I guess if you stuffed yourself with appetizers, meal and dessert it could be accomplished. Some of the prices that people throw around for a one day event or a meal amaze me. Again I can see doing that if you are among the rich and famous so have a need to impress and you have so much $ that it is a drop in the bucket. Nemo, we take lots of cruises and I had no idea you could pay staff to do stuff for you. How do they get any exercise?
Teacher Terry is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2018, 11:26 AM   #167
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Nemo2's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 8,368
Quote:
Originally Posted by Teacher Terry View Post
we take lots of cruises and I had no idea you could pay staff to do stuff for you. How do they get any exercise?
https://cruiseline.com/advice/how-to...rograms-at-sea

Quote:
...Let your round-the-clock butler tend to your every whim
Quote:
...you can count on the concierge and butler to tend to travel needs ranging from pillow requests to arrangements for a wedding proposal.
Quote:
Naturally, the concierge will handle your spa and dining reservations, but he or she will also print your boarding pass.
Being members of the "If we want something we'll ***** well get it ourselves" contingent the concept is alien to us.......neither DW nor I could tolerate someone fussing over us.......another reason that we always eat in the buffet.
__________________
"Exit, pursued by a bear."

The Winter's Tale, William Shakespeare
Nemo2 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2018, 11:30 AM   #168
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Teacher Terry's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 7,001
Nemo, you know what they say "A fool and his $ are soon parted." We actually eat dinner in the dining room because I enjoy the food and the experience. Plus the food is better. We eat our other meals in the buffet. I don't get the specialty restaurants either on the ships. I should pay more $ for dinner when the dining room has great food. They are always trying to up sell them. Last cruise a guy wanted to sell us dinner with the chef at 85/person. He was going on and on and I told him I would think about it and he said that only 5 couples would get to attend so the opportunity would be gone. I told him if it was such a easy sell he would not be wasting so much time bugging me. He huffed and walked off. Pretty funny actually.
Teacher Terry is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2018, 11:51 AM   #169
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Nemo2's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 8,368
Quote:
Originally Posted by Teacher Terry View Post
We actually eat dinner in the dining room because I enjoy the food and the experience. Plus the food is better.
In 2014 we spent about a month on the Norwegian Star; ate in the dining room, (at the behest of friends), maybe 4-5 times max - preferred the buffet.

We have also, on other vessels, had people tell us that the food was almost identical in both venues.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Teacher Terry View Post
I don't get the specialty restaurants either on the ships. I should pay more $ for dinner when the dining room has great food. They are always trying to up sell them. Last cruise a guy wanted to sell us dinner with the chef at 85/person. He was going on and on and I told him I would think about it and he said that only 5 couples would get to attend so the opportunity would be gone. I told him if it was such a easy sell he would not be wasting so much time bugging me. He huffed and walked off. Pretty funny actually.
Last trip, on Royal Caribbean, had a guy come around the buffet at lunch time....asked "When are you going to eat at xxxxx Restaurant?"

I pretended to think for a few seconds and then replied "At a rough guess, NEVER".

On the same ship however, DW spoke a few times to a lady whose husband wanted to eat at all the specialty restaurants........she was nice, but he seemed (to us) to be too impressed by his own 'status' as a whatever-it-is fake passenger level. To each his own......we don't gripe because they are (probably unwittingly) subsidizing our trip.......also, we don't give a ****.
__________________
"Exit, pursued by a bear."

The Winter's Tale, William Shakespeare
Nemo2 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2018, 12:34 PM   #170
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Teacher Terry's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2014
Posts: 7,001
We have only gone on RC and the dining room is better on the ones we have taken. I had not thought about the fact that other over spenders may be helping to keep my price down. Awesome! I love your response) One of the ways we enjoy spending our $ though is to give extra tips to the people that take care of us such as our room steward, dining waiters, etc. This is in addition to the usual tips charged by the cruise line. We know they work long days and work hard and so far we have always gotten excellent service from these people. Because I teach a class online they sometimes have to work around my time to clean our room, bring me an extension cord for my CPAP machine, etc. We tried to bring our own but they take it away from you.
Teacher Terry is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2018, 03:48 PM   #171
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
bclover's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: philly
Posts: 1,219
Quote:
Originally Posted by Teacher Terry View Post
Nemo, you know what they say "A fool and his $ are soon parted." We actually eat dinner in the dining room because I enjoy the food and the experience. Plus the food is better. We eat our other meals in the buffet. I don't get the specialty restaurants either on the ships. I should pay more $ for dinner when the dining room has great food. They are always trying to up sell them. Last cruise a guy wanted to sell us dinner with the chef at 85/person. He was going on and on and I told him I would think about it and he said that only 5 couples would get to attend so the opportunity would be gone. I told him if it was such a easy sell he would not be wasting so much time bugging me. He huffed and walked off. Pretty funny actually.
it's all what you like. I rarely like buffets and something has gone horribly wrong if I'm at a buffet when there are other options. last May we did RC Oasis of the seas. Was the main dining room food great. Not by any definition in my book and after 3 nights yes we were happy not to eat there and eating at chops and Giovanni's

So I guess we're fools lol that's cool. Lol I've also spent 2k on a handbag so what do I know.

Since I can't use the money when I'm dead, I'll use it to have great dining experiences.

dropping 50 bucks at cheesecake factory is easy and yes I get dessert. that's the point of going somewhere called "cheesecake factory" I will say that usually does include the tip. we went last Saturday after the Philly flower show. 3 ladies. got 2 apps, 3 entrees, 3 drinks non alcoholic and 3 pieces of cheesecakes to go. total 127.49 + 24 bucks tip. very easy
__________________
My darling girl, when are you going to realize that being "normal" is not necessarily a virtue? it sometimes rather denotes a lack of courage~Aunt Francis
bclover is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2018, 04:28 PM   #172
Moderator Emeritus
Bestwifeever's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 17,773
Ah, the ancient art of the humblebrag
__________________
“Would you like an adventure now, or would you like to have your tea first?” J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan
Bestwifeever is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2018, 04:34 PM   #173
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
bclover's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2015
Location: philly
Posts: 1,219
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bestwifeever View Post
Ah, the ancient art of the humblebrag
not at all (if you meant my post) I was simply questioning the posters inference that someone who chooses to eat at the specialty restaurants is a "fool".

If anything I find it's the old "early-retirement" rules. If you spend your money according to "er" rules, it's good. if you don't you're a "fool"

lol, eating at a buffet, you're part of the clique.
eating at a steakhouse, not playing well with others
__________________
My darling girl, when are you going to realize that being "normal" is not necessarily a virtue? it sometimes rather denotes a lack of courage~Aunt Francis
bclover is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2018, 04:37 PM   #174
Moderator Emeritus
Bestwifeever's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 17,773
Quote:
Originally Posted by bclover View Post
not at all (if you meant my post) I was simply questioning the posters inference that someone who chooses to eat at the specialty restaurants is a "fool".

If anything I find it's the old "early-retirement" rules. If you spend your money according to "er" rules, it's good. if you don't you're a "fool"
Not at all--you are being subjected to the humble brag! Hey, I would love to go to the Cheesecake Factory with you--my treat!

DD told me once, which pretty much sums me up: "You know when to save money, and you know when to spend money."
__________________
“Would you like an adventure now, or would you like to have your tea first?” J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan
Bestwifeever is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2018, 04:46 PM   #175
Administrator
Gumby's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Posts: 22,971
I find baffling the very concept that I would need someone else's approval for my dining choices. (except for the young wife, of course)
__________________
Living an analog life in the Digital Age.
Gumby is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2018, 05:52 PM   #176
Recycles dryer sheets
 
Join Date: May 2011
Posts: 325
Cannot help but wondering.

What was the brides family response to the compromise?
If there was an agreement.
sanfanciscotreat is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2018, 07:27 PM   #177
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Souschef's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Santa Paula
Posts: 4,068
Quote:
Originally Posted by Teacher Terry View Post
Nemo, you know what they say "A fool and his $ are soon parted." We actually eat dinner in the dining room because I enjoy the food and the experience. Plus the food is better. We eat our other meals in the buffet. I don't get the specialty restaurants either on the ships. I should pay more $ for dinner when the dining room has great food. They are always trying to up sell them. Last cruise a guy wanted to sell us dinner with the chef at 85/person. He was going on and on and I told him I would think about it and he said that only 5 couples would get to attend so the opportunity would be gone. I told him if it was such a easy sell he would not be wasting so much time bugging me. He huffed and walked off. Pretty funny actually.
Dear TT,
YMMV. We enjoy going to the specialty restaurants because the food is cooked to order, and they offer many things unavailable in the MDR. We did the Chef's Table once, and really enjoyed it.
Attached is our story with pictures of our experience.
My wife is a gourmet cook, and I enjoy her cooking. The problem we have found on many mass market cruise ships is the food is dumbed down with little seasonings. In fact, we found a place that sells "travel spices", an assortment of 24 small bottles of spices. I threatened to take them with us.
Attached Files
File Type: pdf PANAMA CANAL 2010.pdf (521.8 KB, 38 views)
__________________
Retired Jan 2009 Have not looked back.
AA 60/35/5 considering SS and pensions a SP annuity
WR 2% with 2SS & 2 Pensions
Souschef is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2018, 07:55 PM   #178
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Just_Steve's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2016
Location: Dutchess County
Posts: 1,599
Souschef, I love the way you document your trips, I have read a bunch of them. I wish I had the patience to do that.
Just_Steve is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-07-2018, 10:11 PM   #179
Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Posts: 11,401
I’ll chime in here. I have cruised four times. In my experience the food at the dining room has generally, but not always, been of a high standard, though on my last cruise, a transatlantic, a newbie waiter brought me the wrong starter, the wrong entree and the wrong dessert! I like to mix my dinners between the dining room and the buffet. The buffet can be a great escape from people you dislike at the dining table. I have only once paid to eat at a specialty restaurant. I did so because there was a long queue for dinner at the very busy dining room. I went to the Italian restaurant, where it was quiet and peaceful, I struck up a fascinating conversation with the waitress, who had time on her hands, and the food was perfect. It was a perfect evening for an introvert!
Meadbh is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 03-08-2018, 12:17 AM   #180
Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Souschef's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2015
Location: Santa Paula
Posts: 4,068
We normally chose Anytime dining, because early seating is too early and late seating is too late.
We ask for a table of 2 or four, and may never see the others again.
__________________
Retired Jan 2009 Have not looked back.
AA 60/35/5 considering SS and pensions a SP annuity
WR 2% with 2SS & 2 Pensions
Souschef is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Currently Active Users Viewing This Thread: 1 (0 members and 1 guests)
 
Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off


Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
Weddings Moemg Other topics 62 01-06-2018 07:35 PM
Weddings imoldernu Other topics 72 06-11-2015 04:49 PM
Divorced Parent Budgeting for "Kids" Weddings prototype FIRE and Money 42 02-08-2015 11:05 PM
Weddings Khan Other topics 43 12-06-2013 12:36 PM
High costs of weddings...and going into debt? maddythebeagle Young Dreamers 91 07-27-2008 08:49 PM

» Quick Links

 
All times are GMT -6. The time now is 07:26 AM.
 
Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8 Beta 1
Copyright ©2000 - 2024, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.