High School Reunions & Shattered Illusions

[haha]

I haven't been to a reunion in a while, but it seems to me that men last quite well. I see guys all the time who are with women who could be their mothers, going by looks.

Also, men are more accepted by women as they age than vice versa. I can go dancing and dance with many women some quite young. It is much harder for an older woman, because unless she has brass balls she will wait to be asked, which can be a long time.

BTW, if there is a really old gal there I will always dance with her. Makes her feel good, and shows all the younger women that I am a mensch.

Ha

[donheff]

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Originally Posted by HaHa BTW, if there is a really old gal there I will always dance with her. Makes her feel good, and shows all the younger women that I am a mensch. Ha

Damn, Ha. Betwen you and Azanon now I get all the tips I needed when I was single.

[Cool Dood]

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Originally Posted by shiny As mentioned on the book post: I just finished Nora Ephron's new book. One of her theories is that women 40-60 look so much younger these days due to hair dye. Not only are more women dying their hair, but it is of better quality. So, if the women are dying and the men aren't that could be a difference right there.

I could certainly imagine that. A lot of the hair dye, plastic surgery, etc., has historically just made old women look like old women with hair dye or plastic surgery, but I guess in the not-too-distant future it will make old women look like young women, and we're somewhere in the middle, now.

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Plus, in our society men just don't have to try as hard to keep their looks. They are judged mainly on different criteria.

Ding ding ding!

[Mr._johngalt]

In the book I just finished ('Gellhorn', bio of Hemingway's 3rd wife)
she opined that when your vanity goes so that you no longer care
about your physical appearance, then you are truly "old" and ready
to go. I happen to agree with this.

JG

[mathjak107]

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Originally Posted by Mr._johngalt Not for me. They always had to look good although I do confess a couple of times I let a couple slip by my radar that were not deep thinkers. An aside. I never dated a girl from my own class in high school. I call it the "Icarus effect". They were flying too close to the sun. JG DEEP THINKERS? HA HA HA . hey growing up if a woman was hot looking the fact that she spoke in complete sentances was a bonus.

[Mr._johngalt]

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Originally Posted by mathjak107

I agree mathjak, but I never rolled over in the morning and said
"Oh my God! What have I done?" Just lucky I guess.

JG

[windsurf]

Shiny said: "Plus, it is a biological fact that testosterone is stressful for the body. I guess in addition to more heart attacks, etc. it ages men as well."

I have to disagree there. Metabolic dysfunction (from insulin resistance/pre-diabetes, obesity, wasting of muscle mass) drives down testosterone. Low testosterone is a biomarker of aging. Higher testosterone in the context of hormonal balance is a biomarker of healthful aging and is essential for maintaining muscle mass as well as cardiac and brain health.

[shiny]

I don't mind being disagreed with one bit. But I just wanted to clarify that I know the male body needs testosterone in order to function properly (females need a little too). Its just that, from what I've read, testosterone is a contributing factor to the stress on males and that is why, on average, they don't live as long as women.

But - I'm RIGHT on the hair dye issue, 100% admit it!!!

[Cool Dood]

Surely testosterone causes males to do things that will lead to a lot of stress, and a shorter life than women.

[dmpi]

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Originally Posted by REWahoo! I went to my 10th HS reunion and did not enjoy myself at all. Everyone seemed to be saying “Look how well I’m doing...” It was so bad I could hardly get anyone to listen to all my accomplishments. Didn’t return again until the 25th, and had so much fun I’ve attended every reunion since. My theory is by the time many people reach their 50’s they are at the ‘what you see is what you get’ stage, and no longer spend much time trying to impress others with what they’ve done in life. We seemed to focus on having a good time and telling lies incorrectly recalling past events.

Same thing happend to me. But my 25th was a few years after the dot-com went bust. I'm sure some of the people were "between jobs". The theme of the reunion could have been "don't ask. don't tell".

[Mr._johngalt]

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Originally Posted by dmpi Same thing happend to me. But my 25th was a few years after the dot-com went bust. I'm sure some of the people were "between jobs". The theme of the reunion could have been "don't ask. don't tell".

One thing that helps is if you did better, look better, and are retired
and having fun. Makes for a better time in most any venue.

JG

[HFWR]

Went to our 25th. A pretty good mix of those who had "aged well" and those who hadn't...

In a way, it was nice to see those folks, with whom I'd spent so many years of my youth. In another way, it was surreal/other-worldly revisiting the past.

Not sure if I'll go again...

[Jeb-NY]

I have been to all but one of my reunions. Latest was the 40th. There always seem to be a general theme.

First one was who is married and where are you working, 2nd was how many kids, eventually who are grandparents, etc. I figured this would be who took early retirement, but was wrong only 2 of us had really took ER, one has been on disability for years so I guess that counts as 3. Only one other was close and figured he would do it before the end of the year, was waiting for a buy out offer.

There was the spread already talked about, from aged very well to one that could pass as her Mother.

Jeb-NY

[ash]

I didn't attend my 5th or 10th, but my 20th is coming up in a couple of years.

I always thought it would be fun to counter the "look at my accomplishments" syndrome by attending in tattered clothes with a horrible story of spending the last 20 years in and out of methadone clinics and half-way houses...of course I'd be divorced, my kids would have been placed with foster care and I'd be working fast food.

[Nords]

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Originally Posted by ash I always thought it would be fun to counter the "look at my accomplishments" syndrome by attending in tattered clothes with a horrible story of spending the last 20 years in and out of methadone clinics and half-way houses...of course I'd be divorced, my kids would have been placed with foster care and I'd be working fast food.

You know your mother said no good would come from hanging around with that Keith Richards boy...

[daystar]

My 10 year reunion is coming up next year. Wish me luck. :

[laurence]

My 10 year reunion was a big dissapointment, almost everyone who showed up was suffering from arrested development, or so it seemed. Jocks were still acting like jocks - even though they all worked at the local Budweiser plant. The Cheerleaders had prematurely aged due to the Sun yet still acted too good for everybody except their Jock Budweiser boyfriends/husbands. And the student government types were still trying to act like they were the leaders.

A table of about 10 of us formed who had actually moved on, we had a good time chatting about real life, but otherwise, what a waste. I hear the 20 is a lot better, most people grow up by then.

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Originally Posted by Laurence I hear the 20 is a lot better, most people grow up by then.

Don't count on it. I experienced the same thing at my 20 and 30. - I may not go again until the 60th. - Just to see who still is alive.

[Gumby]

I haven't seen anyone in my high school class since the day I graduated. But I did recently attend my 25th college reunion. I found that the people I liked then, I still like. And the people I didn't like then, I still don't like, although I am better at tolerating them now.

[Nords]

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Originally Posted by Gumby But I did recently attend my 25th college reunion. I found that the people I liked then, I still like. And the people I didn't like then, I still don't like, although I am better at tolerating them now.

I'm not sure about our 25th college reunion. It's probably too late to make reservations anyway, the kid won't get off school, it's a long way to fly for a social weekend, and so on.

But when we visited USNA this summer I was hugely entertained by sharing frosty beverages with classmates who were tired of active duty yet didn't know how they were ever going to entertain themselves in retirement. One woman had started a boat-chartering business and was working more/harder/longer/earning less than her active-duty days. As a small-business owner her lack of understanding of the financials was pretty darn scary. But she just could not find her own "OFF" switch and this is what she decided she "needed" to do.

I'd enjoy my 30th high school reunion, although I'd probably enjoy it more if I went alone and didn't have to keep the family entertained. I'd also enjoy showing our kid around the ol' neighborhood, but I'm not so sure that I'd enjoy the spouse/daughter interrogations so much: "Who was that? Did you guys date? Was she one of your girlfriends? What did she mean by that remark about seeing you later?!?" Maybe we'll just save the ol' neighborhood nostalgia trip for a CMU college visit.