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Old 04-28-2016, 04:25 PM   #41
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My wife was and is a SAHM with our two kids (now teens). ER at 43 was fantastic for our marriage and family. We are much more connected and on the same page, with similar priorities.

It might have even saved our marriage because things got pretty rough the last few years before the ER.

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Old 04-29-2016, 06:21 PM   #42
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I'll admit it. I am not a sentimental person and I tend to forget to do small things so I have to remind myself as my DW appreciates more than anything.

A couple ideas
1) learn what her favorite food is and make it. I have become really good at making creme brulee, Carmel corn and apricot scones... and can honestly say I make them better than most restaurants now... In her eyes anyway.

2) flowers. I don't do this enough but she loves flowers. Picking them is much better than buying .

3) giving her time. We have 2 young kids. I enjoy spending time with them so I try to find time (weekly if not not more) to take the kids out and give her some time.

The key is... she does lots of nice little things for me.

I'm amazed at how many couples go the other way. Spend time and energy comparing how little the other person does and trying to nit pick and irritate each other (often through sarcasm). Our relationship isn't perfect... but neither are we.

I'm not religious but I think there much wisdom in there... I think this is a great guide:

"Let not the sun go down in your wrath."


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Old 04-29-2016, 06:29 PM   #43
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One thing no one has mentioned (or I missed it as I skimmed the answers)... With both parties ER'd there's more opportunity for ... ahem... physical companionship.

That can be considered a benefit or a negative...depending on your attitude. LOL.
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Old 04-29-2016, 06:45 PM   #44
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It has been pretty good. I have learned to relax, and I asked my wife how she feels. Her response was "contented". We enjoy each others company and she is more practical than me in some aspects.
The attached sign pretty well sums it up
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File Type: jpg Porch Rules.jpg (329.8 KB, 27 views)
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Old 04-29-2016, 09:11 PM   #45
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rodi View Post
One thing no one has mentioned (or I missed it as I skimmed the answers)... With both parties ER'd there's more opportunity for ... ahem... physical companionship.

That can be considered a benefit or a negative...depending on your attitude. LOL.
+1. We look forward to spontaneity unhindered by lack of sleep!
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Old 05-01-2016, 03:12 PM   #46
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My brilliant and very capable wife left her j*b at my urging about 20 years ago. She was not built for stress and we both realized that. So she decided to take on most household duties and supported me in my career quite flawlessly. Prior to my early retirement we had a planning meeting to define how we would approach finally achieving our dream of being able to spend so much more time together. I offered to take on all the house chores and give her relief from them. She said she wanted to keep some anyway. So, I suggested she give me at least all the ones she hated. Seemed only fair. It gives me great satisfaction each week knowing that I am saving her from these tasks. It's her retirement also.

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Old 05-01-2016, 05:56 PM   #47
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Wish I had something to add.
On July 12th, we'll celebrate 58 years of very happy marriage.

Our mutual observation:
"Between the two of us, we almost make one person."

Wouldn't have it any other way.
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