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How do you answer the “what do you do?” question when most people your age are still
Old 11-27-2018, 08:29 AM   #1
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How do you answer the “what do you do?” question when most people your age are still

(Apologies if this question has been beaten to death in earlier threads. I couldn’t find a thread but if there is one, please send it to me and disregard the question.)

I’ll be retiring at age 53 next year and while that’s not considered “early” by the standards of many on the forum, from the perspective of most Americans (and many my age) it is.

I think I’ll feel a little strange responding to the question “so what line of work are you in?” with “I’m retired.” Saying I’m retired might lead to prying questions about my finances or perhaps arouse feelings of contempt in those who are nowhere close to that goal.

I’ve thought about saying something like “I’m taking a break from work right now and spending time doing X, Y or Z.”

Wanted to hear how others have handled this question. Thanks.
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Old 11-27-2018, 08:34 AM   #2
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What other people think about me is none of my business. Contempt? I doubt it. Probably more like envy. And nobody has ever, ever questioned me about my finances. If they did, I simply wouldn't respond. That's none of THEIR business.
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Old 11-27-2018, 08:46 AM   #3
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I’m over 55 and while that may be early, it’s nothing I’m ashamed of. I tell people that I’m retired. As for follow up questions, I either answer them or I don’t depending how personal they are. They’re usually not. Usually the conversation gets turned back on them as to what they could do to speed up their retirement. Usually that answer is for them to live below their means. That usually shortens the conversation. Most people don’t think they can cut their spending.
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Old 11-27-2018, 09:11 AM   #4
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Originally Posted by Austin704 View Post
(Apologies if this question has been beaten to death in earlier threads. I couldn’t find a thread but if there is one, please send it to me and disregard the question.)

I’ll be retiring at age 53 next year and while that’s not considered “early” by the standards of many on the forum, from the perspective of most Americans (and many my age) it is.

I think I’ll feel a little strange responding to the question “so what line of work are you in?” with “I’m retired.” Saying I’m retired might lead to prying questions about my finances or perhaps arouse feelings of contempt in those who are nowhere close to that goal.

I’ve thought about saying something like “I’m taking a break from work right now and spending time doing X, Y or Z.”

Wanted to hear how others have handled this question. Thanks.
RE'd at 52.
Never got the question about finances; maybe I just don't know anyone that gauche.
Did get a lot of 'Good for you!' and it was left at that. "Taking a break" is a good answer however.
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Old 11-27-2018, 09:17 AM   #5
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Originally Posted by marko View Post
RE'd at 52.
Never got the question about finances; maybe I just don't know anyone that gauche.
Did get a lot of 'Good for you!' and it was left at that. "Taking a break" is a good answer however.

I was also a 53-and-gone person and don’t get questions about finances but do get the “what do you do?”, as in “what do I do for a living?”. These are from well-meaning (not prying, just chatting) people I’ve just met. I usually say, “I took an early out”, that leads to, “What DID I do?”, and it goes on from there. It rarely seems uncomfortable.
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Old 11-27-2018, 09:19 AM   #6
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I always replied "I am retired" and then would tell them what I used to do when I w*rked. Because they always ask. Only comments other than that were "you look too young to retire". No one ever made comments about finances, etc.
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Old 11-27-2018, 09:25 AM   #7
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Originally Posted by Austin704 View Post
<snip>
I’ll be retiring at age 53 next year and while that’s not considered “early” by the standards of many on the forum, from the perspective of most Americans (and many my age) it is.

I think I’ll feel a little strange responding to the question “so what line of work are you in?” with “I’m retired.” Saying I’m retired might lead to prying questions about my finances or perhaps arouse feelings of contempt in those who are nowhere close to that goal.

I’ve thought about saying something like “I’m taking a break from work right now and spending time doing X, Y or Z.”
I'm retired is the honest (and correct answer). So, you might just want to say, "I'm retired."

Q. "How did you do it at such an early age?"

Answer: "I was careful with my money."

Q. "How much did you retire with?"

Answer: "I've always been uncomfortable talking about personal finances. So, let's just say that hopefully, I retired with enough."
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Old 11-27-2018, 09:28 AM   #8
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I usually just say I was fortunate enough to retire early. Taking a break isn't bad to say, but it sounds like you've been laid off or fired and are in need of a job, and I don't want pity, disdain, or help. I get the "too young" comment a lot, and shrug it off. Doesn't bother me.

If people ask what I do with myself, I sometimes tell them some of the things I do with my time, and sometimes just say "Imagine every day is Saturday. And you don't have to cram in all your chores because you don't have time during the week. I do whatever I want."
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Old 11-27-2018, 09:34 AM   #9
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I get "you're too young to be retired" all the time, and I'm 61. It's like I'm breaking a law or something. If they press too much, I just change the subject. If the questions are thoughtful and they genuinely seem to be interested in the "how", I'm glad to divulge more, and steer them here.
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Old 11-27-2018, 09:36 AM   #10
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"I gave up work."
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Old 11-27-2018, 09:40 AM   #11
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One time, at a happy hour type thing, I said, “I’m unemployed” but quickly explained when I could see the person asking the question felt bad.
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Old 11-27-2018, 09:45 AM   #12
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Retired at 52, I am 56 now .... Never had anyone ask about finances, have had people very surprised, then ask how did I do that..... Simple reply.... Started 401k Savings at 20 years old and have been very fortunate and blessed
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Old 11-27-2018, 09:46 AM   #13
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I say, work for the forest preserve district. It's volunteer, but it's still work I love. The thousands of volunteer hours (many volunteers) aid in getting federal and state grants. It gives me purpose on my own time.
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Old 11-27-2018, 09:47 AM   #14
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I retired two years ago at 53, and nobody who finds out comments about it or pries into our finances. There are many people who can retire and claim pensions in their early to mid-50s, including those in the military and a lot of public service professions, and I've learned that it's not as unusual to meet other retired people near our age as I had expected it would be.

Also, I read the other day about a well-known local restaurant that's changing their breakfast hours to "serve the growing community of residents without traditional, nine-to-five jobs." DH and I were joking that this exactly describes us. Soon it will describe you too, so welcome to the club.
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Old 11-27-2018, 10:29 AM   #15
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For me, it's situational dependent. Obviously, all my family and all "good" friends know that I am retired and any of the naysayers have fallen silent since I have "remained retired" for 4 years now. But, when I first retired, there were plenty of questions as to "how", "what are you going to do all day" and the often spoken, "you'll go back to work".

For those that I meet for the first time and that I will not have a lasting relationship with, I usually just say that I am involved in the "finance industry". If they pry further, I will say that I am a personal finance manager or some other bologna. Is this lying? Perhaps. Is it truthful? Perhaps. It IS easier than explaining my situation *especially* since my DW chooses to w*rk. Even here at ER.org, in a relative safe space, some members would say that I am a kept man, or just a laze about while my DW continues to w*rk the salt mines. So, you can imagine what mere acquaintances would think/say. Generally, I don't care what these folks think about my situation, but in the interest in keeping it from getting too awkward, that's what I do.

I have been trying to think how I might adjust my answer, especially since we are moving to a new neighborhood that is pretty small and has very little turnover; I can imagine that some of those folks will be all up in our business. We have also been to some of my DW's family events with a LOT of distant relatives and family friends, and so far I have been able to deflect the question since we are new to the area and are still "getting settled". To those folks, I tell them that I haven't quite figured out what I want to do after I grow up.

Edit: In regards to prying into finances, oddly enough it's been a couple of DW's family members. Just this weekend, we were over at SIL's new home and the subject of our house purchase came up. It is a larger house and isn't a cheap purchase but we are not financing it (and SIL knows this). Nonetheless, she made a couple of comments about how affordable a house (with a pool!) will be (or may not be) when I am not w*rking. She was trying to dig in for some specific numbers, and while normally I don't mind discussing that stuff, she is VERY guarded with ALL of her financial dealings..and that makes me inclined to say "None of your damn business!" I did finally tell her that our total costs (insurance, taxes, maintenance) would be less than 10% of our income and she should stop sweating about OUR finances and that seemed to shut her up.
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Old 11-27-2018, 10:31 AM   #16
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Maybe I hang around people who mind their own business? Basically when asked what I do I say that I am retired and have been for two years. There have not been any follow up questions.
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Old 11-27-2018, 10:38 AM   #17
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"what do you do?"

I mine bitcoin.
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Old 11-27-2018, 10:39 AM   #18
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Old 11-27-2018, 10:43 AM   #19
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We just say retired. If they delve further we say Live below your means and save, save, save. Seems to shut everyone up.
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Old 11-27-2018, 11:04 AM   #20
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These are great responses. I appreciate the perspectives. Seems to me that just being straight up about retirement may the best and that the likelihood of prying questions is remote. I do like the idea of having a back-up “occupation” like “personal finance manager” or “volunteer” as the situation calls for it. It’s not misleading to tell people what you do, even if it is not W-2 work.
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