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Old 10-17-2013, 04:09 PM   #21
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While reaching FI does make it easier to avoid "letting certain co-workers bother you," I never would been able to maintain my performance right up until the end had I waited that long. It's a skill you can learn (and continue to improve) at any age, the sooner the better. I could go on and on but here's some basics...

9 Ways To Manage People Who Bother You
Stop letting things get to you | Dash of Reality

Undoubtedly some will roll their eyes , I did too when I was a 20-something, but it finally clicked for me years later - and made life much better. Don't wait for FI to learn how to stop letting other people/events get to you. YMMV
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Old 10-17-2013, 05:52 PM   #22
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I just needed to develop a tougher hide. I was raised to always try to see things from the other person's point of view, with the result that people at work felt free to jerk me around. Mentors assured me that people will naturally jerk your chain if they think you're vulnerable, so the secret is not to appear vulnerable.

That doesn't mean I don't still get annoyed! I just don't show it, unless I think getting visibly angry may serve a purpose.

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Originally Posted by Midpack View Post
While reaching FI does make it easier to avoid "letting certain co-workers bother you," I never would been able to maintain my performance right up until the end had I waited that long. It's a skill you can learn (and continue to improve) at any age, the sooner the better. I could go on and on but here's some basics...

9 Ways To Manage People Who Bother You
Stop letting things get to you | Dash of Reality

Undoubtedly some will roll their eyes , I did too when I was a 20-something, but it finally clicked for me years later - and made life much better. Don't wait for FI to learn how to stop letting other people/events get to you. YMMV
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Old 10-17-2013, 06:01 PM   #23
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My glide time was about 2 years. After I was approved for an individual health policy. At that point, I knew I was good to go. I worked the extra 2 years to pad the ole portfolio. The stress I had felt went away knowing my plan was in place.
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Old 10-17-2013, 07:17 PM   #24
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I am counting down the days to my quit date in January and I am deeply unenthused about the work at this point. Having deadlines for pointless work pushed in my face and then tightened is making me less and less interested in finishing strong, and just showing up every day to deal with bullcrap is tough. The scheduled internal 1 hour meeting that was supposed to be shorter than that but went over 90 minutes yesterday because my superiors love to hear the sound of their own voices is just the maraschino cherry on top of this **** sundae.

"DEEPLY UNENTHUSED"

Yep, that's likely to become my new glide path motto.

Thx Brewer!
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Old 10-17-2013, 07:20 PM   #25
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I've got 5 months of 2 days a week work left and my work relationships are getting better as time goes on.
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Old 10-17-2013, 07:41 PM   #26
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I've got about one year left before I make some kind of announcement in late 2014. Hopefully it'll be "I'm retiring, never to work again. Bye!"

Or at the very least, if I'm not quite financially there yet, it'll be "I'm taking a sabbatical and going back to Colorado for a couple years. Bye!"

Either way, I've got about one year left. I've reduced my level stress a little by refusing to have just any project or deadline pushed on me. I push back more than I ever have, and have no problems suggesting they dole out the work to other teammates, as my plate is full.

I've also started telling people I can't attend their meetings anymore unless they discuss my deliverables first, and then I need to leave so I can actually go back to my desk and do the work (rather than just talking about it).

I also blocked off two days a week in Outlook with my own all-day meeting reservations, to make it harder for people to just schedule something frivolous. I told them I need two days a week of heads-down time so I can actually get work done. Surprisingly, nobody's pushed back on that one.

I thought at first the next-to-last year (this past year) would be the hardest to get through, but I think I was wrong. I think this last 12 months is going to be hard, because time seems to crawl by so slowly.

I wish I could push a button and have the next 12 months just fly by. For me, it's no longer about the journey. I could care less about the journey now. I just want the reward (money/retirement/freedom) so I can get on with Life 2.0
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Old 10-17-2013, 07:59 PM   #27
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"DEEPLY UNENTHUSED"

Yep, that's likely to become my new glide path motto.

Thx Brewer!
We aim to please (everyone but the squirrels, anyway).

They have burned through yet another person in my shop. A coworker I see eye to eye with told me today that he has had enough after about a year and is actively looking for the next job. He has the prospect of being on the road constantly for at least the next 6 months. Not what was communicated when he took the job and not something that works with small children in the house.
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Old 10-17-2013, 08:56 PM   #28
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How many here who have already reached their FIRE date maintained adequate performance expectations on the job and stayed on top of things, but noticed an attitude change that you weren't going let certain co-workers bother you ( maybe by ignoring them from that point on) or just took things down a gear so to speak ( like punching a drain hole in the bottom of your BS bucket) once you set a date in the not too distant future to RE? If so, how did you make that happen for your situation?
Oh yes, I noticed that attitude change. I would sum it up as "I cared less." Trivia -- like what went wrong, what X or Y thought, etc. -- bothered me less.

As for how it happened, it was largely a conscious decision. When things came up, I would remind myself, "I care too much about this nonsense and it is time for me to stop caring so much." Of course, I still cared about the fundamentals of the job, but the day-to-day junk that gets on our nerves, that stuff receded in importance. I intentionally reminded myself it was not worth caring about, and it would all be over in ____ amount of time. That helped.
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Old 10-17-2013, 10:38 PM   #29
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As for how it happened, it was largely a conscious decision. When things came up, I would remind myself, "I care too much about this nonsense and it is time for me to stop caring so much." Of course, I still cared about the fundamentals of the job, but the day-to-day junk that gets on our nerves, that stuff receded in importance. I intentionally reminded myself it was not worth caring about, and it would all be over in ____ amount of time. That helped.
This is pretty close to the state of mind I have been feeling since I set my date even though its almost 3 years out. I could probably do it now, but I want more NW cushion and my job is usually fine and I have leeway to turn down work if it would interfere with other projects. No one critiques my work either so that's a blessing after hearing what crap others must endure. I also work no more than a 40 hour week and exceed all my project goals on time and under budget, so have always had the leverage to work 40 and still climb the ladder as fast or faster than the long hour office folks that feel tethered to work.

Reading previous posts on this thread has been helpful and very interesting. Definitely a common recognition of coping better when the light can be seen at the end of the tunnel. I also needed a little validation that starting to feel less wrapped up in all the minutia of the little bothersome things with yet a few more years to go was not abnormal.

I guess for me it's kind of like "so close...yet so far" right now. There's a weirdness to it.
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Old 10-18-2013, 10:34 AM   #30
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I've started a long slow glide to the end. Firecalc gives me 98% success for retiring right now, but I plan to hang in until the end of 2016 to become eligible for some good benefits (health insurance for me, college tuition for my kids) and give a bigger margin of error with my spending. The last couple years have been high stress (work combined with being a single mom to very young kids), and I've been very fixated on my net worth and ER date. Now I've managed to arrange things so that the first 8 months of next year should be easy/low stress at work, and the following year should also be pretty manageable. I'm hoping this will make it easier to stay on til Dec 2016 for the extra benefits and financial security.
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Old 10-18-2013, 10:47 AM   #31
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I've started a long slow glide to the end. Firecalc gives me 98% success for retiring right now, but I plan to hang in until the end of 2016 to become eligible for some good benefits (health insurance for me, college tuition for my kids) and give a bigger margin of error with my spending. The last couple years have been high stress (work combined with being a single mom to very young kids), and I've been very fixated on my net worth and ER date. Now I've managed to arrange things so that the first 8 months of next year should be easy/low stress at work, and the following year should also be pretty manageable. I'm hoping this will make it easier to stay on til Dec 2016 for the extra benefits and financial security.
If you are at 98%, be prepared to bail if things get uglier than expected. You are in a position to save yourself if needed, don't waste it if you are put in a position.
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Old 10-18-2013, 10:50 AM   #32
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My glide path is 42 years and counting...

In actuality, I have somewhere between 0-3 years to go, depending on how grant funding for my/any project goes. Three would be ideal monetarily, but if funds dry up completely, I doubt I'll have the give-a-**** to go find another j*b.
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Old 10-18-2013, 11:17 AM   #33
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If you are at 98%, be prepared to bail if things get uglier than expected. You are in a position to save yourself if needed, don't waste it if you are put in a position.

Yeah, the knowledge I can just bail out if I really want/need to is great. Mentally freeing. Once I leave though, it would be nearly impossible for me to get another equivalent job, so I do really want the extra cushion. And luckily my job is such that I can probably minimize new BS flowing my way over the next couple years. Of course we did just get a new guy in charge and it remains to be seen what kind of leader he will be...
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Old 10-18-2013, 12:49 PM   #34
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Presently I am being subjected to highly detailed critiques of my e-mails, by someone who is in a quasi-supervisory position over me (supervisor of record is an absentee landlord). I'll log in, to discover a copy of a selected e-mail, with the critiqued portion highlighted in yellow, plus a detailed explanation of why my word choices, To's and CC's were unsuitable or inappropriate. This of course is to be taken in the spirit of "helping me to improve." If I weren't on the glide path, I'd be seeing red. Now, I feel only pity - and disgust.

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You missed a comma. Please fill out a TPS report.
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Old 10-18-2013, 01:20 PM   #35
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I've started a long slow glide to the end. Firecalc gives me 98% success for retiring right now, but I plan to hang in until the end of 2016 to become eligible for some good benefits (health insurance for me, college tuition for my kids) and give a bigger margin of error with my spending. The last couple years have been high stress (work combined with being a single mom to very young kids), and I've been very fixated on my net worth and ER date. Now I've managed to arrange things so that the first 8 months of next year should be easy/low stress at work, and the following year should also be pretty manageable. I'm hoping this will make it easier to stay on til Dec 2016 for the extra benefits and financial security.
Interesting. My glide path ends next year and it's like I'm already semi-retired. I could probably retire now but I'm too damned paranoid. Have an appointment Monday with a VG planner so we'll see what further advice I get.

Guess I consider myself semi-retired now because I come in late, miss any meetings I don't want to go to, and some days just call in because "something came up at home". In a way, it's like I have an internal attitude of a temp. Helps that I have every other Friday off and take 1-4 mental health days off a month (much vacation accrued). Also helps that I'm way overqualified for my position so I add a lot of value just by opening my mouth. Meanwhile, the focus is completely on life after ER, not anything to do with my current work. The idiots, boobs, political stuff I not only don't respond to, I don't even acknowledge. No, I'm not unenthused, I'm uninvolved. I'm in the job, just not of it.
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Old 10-18-2013, 01:25 PM   #36
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What is TPS? Totally Petty $#!+ ?

Oh sorry, I suppose not knowing will get me in trouble too...



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You missed a comma. Please fill out a TPS report.
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Old 10-18-2013, 02:29 PM   #37
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All time classic from Office Space, Amethyst.
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Old 10-18-2013, 06:04 PM   #38
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What is TPS? Totally Petty $#!+ ?

Oh sorry, I suppose not knowing will get me in trouble too...
Now you'll have to write a memo justifying why you didn't read and follow the memo.
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Old 10-18-2013, 06:42 PM   #39
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What is TPS? Totally Petty $#!+ ?

Oh sorry, I suppose not knowing will get me in trouble too...
Uh, yea. If you could just put a cover sheet on all future TPS reports Amethyst. That would be great.
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Old 10-18-2013, 07:34 PM   #40
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Just a couple months of gliding for me, but it was very enjoyable - nothing seemed to bother me. I could not glide earlier, since people my age and experience were getting laid off.
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