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it's NOT what you know!!!
Old 02-08-2012, 10:34 AM   #1
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it's NOT what you know!!!

I was told from the early age that "it's NOT what you know but it's WHO you know" that matter. Well, I went to the super bowl party over the weekend and looking around the room we come to realize such statement is no longer true. :-)

The folks that seems to do well (upper middle class) are all about "it's NOT what you know, it's NOT who you know but it's all about it's WHO you married" that matter. (jk)

any comment

enuff
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Old 02-08-2012, 10:40 AM   #2
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You thinking about divorcing and getting a do-over?
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Old 02-08-2012, 10:41 AM   #3
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You thinking about divorcing and getting a do-over?
That's what it sounded like to me!
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Old 02-08-2012, 10:53 AM   #4
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So who did you marry?
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Old 02-08-2012, 12:17 PM   #5
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It's still what you know AND who you know first. And good luck marrying to 'do well' when you don't know much and don't know anyone...
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Old 02-08-2012, 12:44 PM   #6
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My aunt used to tell me that "it is just as easy to love a rich girl as a poor girl".

(Wish I had listened).
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Old 02-08-2012, 01:11 PM   #7
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You thinking about divorcing and getting a do-over?

not a chance. My Boss and I are doing just fine. I saw some misery and broken guy and it thinks it was "it's who you married". :-)
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Old 02-08-2012, 01:21 PM   #8
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I did it wrong the first time. Result was just shy of bankruptcy and a whole slough of other problems. Hmmm, is slough right? Eventually remarried and this has been every bit as good as the I had hoped in my wildest dreams before my first marriage. I couldn't be able to even think about E-R without a willing partner. Her history was about the same, except her ex did force her into bankruptcy.
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Old 02-08-2012, 01:36 PM   #9
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Slew...

slough 1(sl, slou) also slew (sl)
n. 1. A depression or hollow, usually filled with deep mud or mire.
2. also slue A stagnant swamp, marsh, bog, or pond, especially as part of a bayou, inlet, or backwater.
3. A state of deep despair or moral degradation.
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Old 02-08-2012, 01:48 PM   #10
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I feel that one of the strongest things about my marriage is that DH and I have a very similar outlook on money, saving, and ER. We're both careful spenders, I think it was a sign that when I asked him out for a date, it was cause I had free passes to Sea World.

Both our families were poor when we were young, but moved into solid middle class. We've been able to take that good sense, and move into upper middle class. So I guess it is about WHO you marry.

More to the point of the thread - I think it's more about attitude than the bank account. Too many times the bank account comes with someone that is used to spending money.
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Old 02-08-2012, 08:59 PM   #11
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Actually its who knows you. The idea being make enough of an impression and a good one that they will like and remember you. Then they might help when needed! Just because you know them does not mean that give a flip about you.
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Old 02-08-2012, 09:36 PM   #12
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My father grew up in the "good 'ole boys network" of Boston. Where, when it comes to getting jobs or doing business, favoritism and racism won out over ability and merit. "It's not what you know, it's who you know," has been one of his mantras for years. And rightly so given where he came from.

I always resented it though, because I don't know a lot of people, but I do know a lot of stuff. And I don't like the idea of cities, the state, the county or public corporations being run by people who happen to be the best schmoozers, or of the right lineage, rather than of the greatest ability.

Though I do think things have been changing, at least in Boston, over the last couple of decades. Moving towards actually respecting the mechanics in place to ensure jobs and contracts go to the most qualified people, not the best connected. A high profile example of it is when the former speaker, Sal DiMasi was sentenced to 8 years for offering favoritism towards a particular government contractor. What he did was clearly illegal and corrupt. But a good number of people in the city (most?) still defend him saying, "Well, sure he was technically in the wrong, but that's just how things are done around here."
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Old 02-08-2012, 11:32 PM   #13
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Slew...

slough 1(sl, slou) also slew (sl)
n. 1. A depression or hollow, usually filled with deep mud or mire.
2. also slue A stagnant swamp, marsh, bog, or pond, especially as part of a bayou, inlet, or backwater.
3. A state of deep despair or moral degradation.

Thanks! Looks like I would have been okay with any spelling. In Elizabethan times, words were 'spelt' as they sound'd. I see how the current school generation seems to be taught in a similar outlook. Not that I am jealous or anything...
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Old 02-09-2012, 03:30 AM   #14
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In an altruistic sense, you want it to be what you know. However, we all have probably benefited from someone in the right place or position. I've never sought the network, but there have been a couple key points in my life that having the friend in high places made a key difference.

My first assignment in the Army I was a truck driver, who lost his license I was moved to a key punch assignment and started working some spare time with a programmer and was able to take his job when he left. Upon my first re-enlistment the old boss took a slot in a programmers class and gave it to me. That got me started as a programmer. If not for the "favor" no telling what skill/profession I would have followed. A key in my professional life, and personal one as it allowed me to meet my DW.
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Old 02-09-2012, 10:45 AM   #15
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Trophy girls are expensive and high maintenance cost, as are toyboys.
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Old 02-09-2012, 03:16 PM   #16
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My name is Grasshopper, and I am a goldigger. Gee I did the trailing spouse thing so many times I should have written a book. It is very hard being married to a big shot trophy wife.
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