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Old 09-11-2014, 03:59 PM   #21
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First off, we moved about 17 times in the first 30 or so years of our marriage. New places are what you make of it. You can play 'Ain't it Awful' i.e. Ait it awful.... all this traffic.... this hot weather..... this commute.... not close to XXX. If you play this game you will be miserable no matter how happy DW is! So for me, moving is just another experience with new friends to meet and things to do.

How hard would it be for you find meaningful work in Alpharetta?
What effect would loosing your position have on your relationship?
What effect would not moving have on your relationship?
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Old 09-11-2014, 05:44 PM   #22
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How hard would it be for you find meaningful work in Alpharetta?
No more difficult than here.
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Originally Posted by Rustic23 View Post
What effect would loosing your position have on your relationship?
Probably none.
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What effect would not moving have on your relationship?
More than losing my position, but still probably not much.

Other answers would make the decision easier.
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Old 09-11-2014, 06:27 PM   #23
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In my experience, once you've given something like this so much thought - you should just do it. Otherwise, you leave yourself open to regret. People don't seem to regret action as much as inaction. All the best.
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Old 09-12-2014, 04:41 AM   #24
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I should have checked this morning, but right now Google Maps says 12 minutes. I have to remember to check at 5pm and again tomorrow morning at 8am.
Alpharetta to Roswell Park was 22 minutes last night at 5pm, via Mansell Road rather than 400.

We keep finding ourselves trying to work out logistics rather than thinking about the actual decision, probably because solving logistical problems is something we can accomplish by research and diligent application of organization skills, and the actual decision is something that requires insights that we cannot "look up" but rather have to be shared by people with similar values who have encountered the same decision.
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Old 09-12-2014, 10:17 AM   #25
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I moved for love in 1995. Got FT employment in 1997 after lots of contract work. Retired in August 2002. DW retired in 2004. Never regretted it.

The thing about change is that it is good for some people not others. You need to assess that above all.
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Old 09-12-2014, 02:23 PM   #26
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- You need to play the "what is the worst that could happen" and determine if you could tolerate it. For example, what if several weeks or months after you move your boss suddenly says that the remote work is not working out, or there has been a change in policy/attitude, and you find yourself out of a job. Can you comfortably retire and live on your retirement+spouse income? Will you have to, or want to, seek work again - and what are the odds you can find something in the new area, knowing that you likely will not be making as much?
+ 1

I relocated 12 years ago, at my request. I've been working remotely from everyone I work with. For the first year I went back north 1 week / month for "face time" with the team. The second year the I went back 1 week every 2 months. I haven't been back in 5 years. Over the 12 years there have been several discussions in Sr Mgmt about eliminating remote work. I knew that was a risk so when we moved I based our budget and our spending on the assumption that I would make 1/2 of my salary at the time of the move.

I also agree with renting first. Put your stuff in a POD and take your time finding a new home.
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Old 09-29-2014, 10:33 AM   #27
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An update. We saw 17 homes in two days this weekend. We have several good choices left after that - perhaps three that we're excited about - but if things move fast enough on the selling-side of the situation, perhaps one of these three will still be available. If not, we'll have to consider "second choices", renting for a while (which we'd utterly hate), or coming back for a weekend to check out options that go on the market from now until then. We're still waiting to hear what assistance my spouse's employer will offer. Significant assistance could bring a couple more options we saw into the range of our budget.

Two units in our current condo went up for sale last Wednesday, one right across the street and one two doors down. One accepted an offer immediately, the other is considering four offers, including one higher than asking price, and will go to contract this week. So we'll probably have an unimpeded market to sell in, and perhaps might even raise the asking price over that of our across-the-street neighbor (although they are both end units, and the latter with a woodworker's shop in the basement).

The main aspects of the decision though were [a] the people; and [b] the heat. It's been a good week here for me to visit and make the heat-related determination. I know that this place gets as hot and humid as all heck over the summer, but here we are in the first week of fall and it was rather comfortable. I'm shut-in three months a year up north (over the winter), so exchanging shut-in time from winter to summer is an even trade or better.

And the people we met a church sold it for me. Open, caring, and sincerely welcoming - a couple of them making clear, after talking with my spouse and I a bit, that they sincerely hope we relocate.

So my spouse and I will talk it over a bit more, but while a week ago the probability was 60/40 (and I wasn't sure what the 60 was or what the 40 was), we're now well over 80/20 in favor of moving.
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Old 09-29-2014, 11:18 AM   #28
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Old 09-29-2014, 12:02 PM   #29
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Great! I am so glad to read that the decision became simpler for you over time, after finding out more about your new community.

I am certain that you will find the perfect home, in time. Renting might not be such a bad idea, because you will be learning more about the area and neighborhoods every day.

If you are concerned about moving twice, you could put most of your stuff in storage and just take what you might need during a brief stay in an apartment. Then you could send for the rest of your stuff once you have found the perfect home. That might make it a little easier, by cutting back on some of the packing and unpacking.
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Old 09-29-2014, 12:15 PM   #30
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Great! I am so glad to read that the decision became simpler for you over time, after finding out more about your new community.

I am certain that you will find the perfect home, in time. Renting might not be such a bad idea, because you will be learning more about the area and neighborhoods every day.

If you are concerned about moving twice, you could put most of your stuff in storage and just take what you might need during a brief stay in an apartment. Then you could send for the rest of your stuff once you have found the perfect home. That might make it a little easier, by cutting back on some of the packing and unpacking.
This is great advice. I spent a year as a renter (Company paid for 6 months rent as part of the moving package) with my belongings in storage until we found the perfect place here. I am so glad I did. Bought ( Okay.. stole..) my place as a short sale . Couldn't be happier with having all that time to decide just where we wanted to live and find a fabulous home at the right price.
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Old 09-29-2014, 12:33 PM   #31
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Renting might not be such a bad idea, because you will be learning more about the area and neighborhoods every day.
I don't buy this, for reasons I alluded to earlier.

It is such a weird aspect of this: So many people are so passionate about renting first, without knowing us or our situation, that in some cases it has bordered on the offensive. People are different, and so what works best for one person won't be the right choice for other people.
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Old 09-29-2014, 12:51 PM   #32
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Renting might not be such a bad idea, because you will be learning more about the area and neighborhoods every day.
I don't buy this, for reasons I alluded to earlier.

It is such a weird aspect of this: So many people are so passionate about renting first, without knowing us or our situation, that in some cases it has bordered on the offensive. People are different, and so what works best for one person won't be the right choice for other people.
Well fooey! I skimmed over the entire thread twice before posting, but somehow didn't see anything that would preclude renting. My apologies!

When I moved just 50 miles from Baton Rouge, to here, I rented despite the fact that I had been spending weekends down here every week for several years. Thank goodness I did that because it saved me a tremendous amount of money. But, as you say, people are different.
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Old 09-29-2014, 01:03 PM   #33
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Well fooey! I skimmed over the entire thread twice before posting, but somehow didn't see anything that would preclude renting. My apologies!
Not a problem. Here's the link:

Moving for Love

Middle of the post.

And to be clear, "so many people" was not limited to this thread in this forum. I've had this discussion in other venues, and my comment should be read as a general comment.
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Old 09-29-2014, 02:20 PM   #34
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When I moved just 50 miles from Baton Rouge, to here, I rented despite the fact that I had been spending weekends down here every week for several years. Thank goodness I did that because it saved me a tremendous amount of money. But, as you say, people are different.
We rented before purchasing, more than once. Living in an area made it easier to search for and choose neighborhoods and property. After factoring in taxes, insurance and other aspects of the cost of ownership, renting was a manageable expense and, like your case, paid for itself.
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