Ready to pull the plug..

[24601NoMore]

Well, down to T-2 more days and not sure I'm any closer to a decision.

I THOUGHT I decided last night to go for it. Of course, that was after an adult beverage or three which may have affected my judgement

Today, I keep coming up with all the reasons NOT to do it - but then realize we somewhat "have" to move for the privacy and don't want to stay in this house forever. And after 10+ years of looking hard for something else, am not convinced we would ever find something acceptable unless we build new.

Making it even more challenging - work is super busy at the moment. Taking a rare 5 minute break but will be working late today and tomorrow and need to let the sellers know by Friday. UGH!!

 

[wdberry62]

FWIW, I retired last year @ 56, which was about a year and a half ahead of my original master timeline. Had planned to retire at the end of 2018, decided to walk away on June 30, 2017.

Like you, I had used every tool referenced on this forum to analyze our financial situation and was confident that we had enough money to make it under any possible scenarios. Also, similar to your situation, I was making a salary that was more than I ever expected to make when I started my career 34 years ago. I simply couldn't take the travel and the stress anymore.

I decided to retire and spend more time with my DW and last child still at home. I was terrified that I'd wake up one morning and hate my job and my life and everything about it. Luckily, I got out before that ever happened. I've been retired for about 7 months and haven't regretted it for a second so far.

If it were me, I'd walk away. I'd give MegaCorp a reasonable notice so that they can find your replacement (no sense burning any bridges). And - I'd take a pass on the retirement property/home for now. If that's the right thing for you, you'll get another shot at that property or something similar (after all, you're only 54). For now, seems as if it's just creating an unnecessary pressure point.

Your health, happiness, sanity and family are more important than any paycheck or additional home. Luckily, you're in a financial situation that provides you with options that most others don't have. You've earned that option because of your hard work and responsible behavior. Now, take advantage of it.

 

[ivinsfan]

Well, down to T-2 more days and not sure I'm any closer to a decision.

I THOUGHT I decided last night to go for it. Of course, that was after an adult beverage or three which may have affected my judgement

Today, I keep coming up with all the reasons NOT to do it - but then realize we somewhat "have" to move for the privacy and don't want to stay in this house forever. And after 10+ years of looking hard for something else, am not convinced we would ever find something acceptable unless we build new.

Making it even more challenging - work is super busy at the moment. Taking a rare 5 minute break but will be working late today and tomorrow and need to let the sellers know by Friday. UGH!!

The last time this property was discussed here I thought you were really struggling with it being too far away from medical care due to some issues your spouse has, have you resolved this issue? I really thought you were leaning toward not buying for that reason.

 

[JoeWras]

I'm following this thread with interest. We are lucky in that we already live in the perfect house in the perfect location. Except for one thing: the kitchen. I'm ready to retire but we wanted to do a kitchen remodel first. The estimate comes out to about 70k. I considered between paying it off and retiring anyway. We would take a 2.8k hit on our annual retirement per the 4% rule. I also considered working another year, and paying it off from our salary. I finally decided on starting my retirement withdrawals early. Since we have no pension, we are planning on taking out 12k a month from our retirement funds to live on. The compromise is to take the withdrawals 6 months early and pay off the kitchen in 6 months. Work those 6 months and then retire. Call it the OM6Ms strategy!

Me too. Shooting for May to end my multiple OMY.

But that kitchen. Oh yeah, oh yeah, I want it too, and figure about the same amount.

DW and I have decided to let me blow out the walled in bogus pantry and convert it to cabinets. This will give us more room, actually. I should be able to do that for under $4k and sweat equity. We'll see how it goes, but I have a feeling some serious remodeling is in our future and we need to be sure to account for it.

Now I'm sweating about the roof. Darn, all this house cost stuff is starting to worry me about ER! Stop it, Joe. STOP!

 

[whatnot]

I could have written this Post!

Thinking it's finally time to RE (me - 54..DW - 60) but still suffering from OMY syndrome. Me 56 DH 60

I've modeled things out till the cows come home and am confident we'll be more than fine financially, but the thought of leaving a pretty good paying (but brutally horrible & stressful) mega-corp job where my W-2s are at #s I thought I'd never see is pretty challenging.
Ditto & Ditto

Complicating things is a choice we need to make this week (Friday is the drop dead decision day) on whether to buy the retirement property I mentioned previously. Cost of building is just super sky high at this point, and we'd be looking at a net $200 - 250K above and beyond what we'd get for our current house before all is said and done, which seems REALLY tough to do right before RE. Seems like that money would be better spent buying healthcare coverage until both DW and I get to Medicare..(I also checked that..yikes. Easily $20K/year even WITH income limited ACA subsidies). Our plan is to sell our current home and budget for next home is $250k more that current home net (aprox). Luckily DH has retiree health ins for both of us so premiums are <$500 mo. BUT this is a retiree benefit that can be eliminated at any time so I do worry about that. I do have $16k budgeted in retirement.

So, curious - how did those of you who RE'd decide to walk away from the additional $s (which in our case would allow us to do something we've dreamed about for literally decades now)? Once I leave, it's unlikely (at my age) I'd ever get back in..and it just seems that 54 is way too young to call it a day for good. If I could do OMY, I could fund the retirement house..but also at a cost of further damage to my and possibly DW's health from the additional stress also..
DH works min. 12+ hours a day. Plus calls at night and on weekend. So I feel that he has paid his dues. Been at job for 37 yrs. He is ready and so I am... but I am the worrier and the planner!

Really tough decision, but it's more likely than not that 2018 will be the year we both hang up the "gone fishing" signs..the work stress is extremely high and in the big picture becoming increasingly not worth it..

Would appreciate any thoughts and experiences you guys can share.

We have set our notice dates for mid March.
1. The Market has really helped in the decision. We are about 23% above our original $ goal. Intend to pull $200 k from 401k to not have a mortgage.
2. Health - I believe the stress of our jobs and time required (DH) are taking a toll. Goal is to focus on our health in retirement.
3. Time vs money - Although I do have anxiety about leaving our really good paying jobs (for us). We have both worked since we were 16. I know that having time to enjoy life while we are both reasonably healthy can change in an instant. Death of 2 friends (57 & 61) very suddenly. Car accident and sudden illness of our very fit friend. Also death of cousin @ 38 from brain aneurysm.
4. Regarding cost of your home. Go for it! You have looked for a long time. You have done the pros and cons. Some people want to spend 10% of net worth on home and others spend 25%. Only you can decide how to allocate your $.

Your post really did resonate with me. I am going through a lot of the same emotions. Good luck!

 

[24601NoMore]

The last time this property was discussed here I thought you were really struggling with it being too far away from medical care due to some issues your spouse has, have you resolved this issue? I really thought you were leaning toward not buying for that reason.

Yeah..that's probably the #1 "not to" reason. But we've also come to realize that we will probably never be able to find the purple unicorn pre-built house that has most of the things we want, so our best bet is probably to build. And with very limited land around here, this is probably the best spot TO build (privacy wise) we are going to ever find.

The list of "why" and "why not" is pretty equally balanced. Which is why it's been such an excruciatingly hard decision..DW and I have pretty much come to realize that we will regret our decision in some way no matter what we decide.

We've had the longest due diligence period in history on this thing..I'm truthfully surprised they signed our offer - I had 90 days to evaluate then a 30 day extension if needed. So, we've been on 120 days now..no wonder we're worn out by the process!

 

[24601NoMore]

I could have written this Post!

Our plan is to sell our current home and budget for next home is $250k more that current home net (aprox).

Isn't it insane? We always thought we could sell our house for MORE than we paid for it and pocket the extra AFTER we bought the next house. Nope. Would "lose" ~$200K on this house and have to invest an additional $200K above what we'd get for this in next house. All to get roughly the same level of quality and IN A SMALLER HOUSE!! Crazy.

That's not such an attractive proposition..privacy or any other "benefit" aside..so, all else aside, the financial aspects of this make it almost a no brainer to stay put.

New construction right now is just "foofy" priced. That's actually the one thing we've come to conclude in our (very long) due diligence period. We never expected $200/sq ft for "basic" nice - JUST for the house. Add land cost, lawn, sprinklers, deck, window treatments, etc and you're talking SERIOUS $$ to build.

IF we could find a used house, it'd be a heck of a lot more financially attractive. But we've looked (forever) and there is always something (too skinny of a lot with close neighbors, 2nd floor master, not enough windows, etc, etc) that kills just about every house we've ever looked at..

 

[whatnot]

We have just started our home search. Currently live in a 4 bed 2 1/2 - 2 story with master on 2nd floor. We want either a one story or a home with master on 1st floor. Also, we don't want a formal living or dining. We hardly ever use them. Would like 3 bed 2 1/2 baths.
Good luck with your decision.

 

[Scuba]

FWIW, I retired last year @ 56, which was about a year and a half ahead of my original master timeline. Had planned to retire at the end of 2018, decided to walk away on June 30, 2017.

Like you, I had used every tool referenced on this forum to analyze our financial situation and was confident that we had enough money to make it under any possible scenarios. Also, similar to your situation, I was making a salary that was more than I ever expected to make when I started my career 34 years ago. I simply couldn't take the travel and the stress anymore.

I decided to retire and spend more time with my DW and last child still at home. I was terrified that I'd wake up one morning and hate my job and my life and everything about it. Luckily, I got out before that ever happened. I've been retired for about 7 months and haven't regretted it for a second so far.

If it were me, I'd walk away. I'd give MegaCorp a reasonable notice so that they can find your replacement (no sense burning any bridges). And - I'd take a pass on the retirement property/home for now. If that's the right thing for you, you'll get another shot at that property or something similar (after all, you're only 54). For now, seems as if it's just creating an unnecessary pressure point.

Your health, happiness, sanity and family are more important than any paycheck or additional home. Luckily, you're in a financial situation that provides you with options that most others don't have. You've earned that option because of your hard work and responsible behavior. Now, take advantage of it.

+1

 

[24601NoMore]

So, after MUCH agonizing (to the point it damn near killed both of us)..we're moving forward with the purchase and close mid next week.

I'll need to w*rk the rest of this year, and DW will need to w*rk through June -just to pay for the properties (2) and the architect, plus our 2018 expenses. Then, we can "roughly" trade current house for new house.

After that, I'll probably need to W*rk another year for deck, landscape, patio, window treatments, furnishings, ...

Of course, current job SUCKS and I may not make it to June, let alone Dec of 2019. So I may need to find another J*b between now and then (UGH).

HOPEFULLY this will give us the privacy and "spirit" we are looking for.

The two properties together are totally private - roughly 1,000 ft wide at the front..450 at the back..NO-ONE behind us except nature.

Went out there today (sunny blue skies, spring was in the air) and thought "wow..this is beautiful..WTF would you NOT buy this, you dumb Sh!t?").

Very tough decision. Commits me to W*rk for another year, possibly two, which might just kill me.

DW will be done in June.

Wish us luck..we're sure going to need it. Hopefully will be worth all the suffering in the end, when we finally move in, 2 years from now..am optimistic that being on "volunteer" ambulance, 30 minutes from any hospital will not be a fatal decision.

 

[Yarnstormer]

You know, if you retire and stay where you are you will have your neighborhood to yourself while the kids and parents are in school! It sounds like you need some downtime, not two years of stressful probably over budget house building.

 

[24601NoMore]

You know, if you retire and stay where you are you will have your neighborhood to yourself while the kids and parents are in school! It sounds like you need some downtime, not two years of stressful probably over budget house building.

Yeah, but the kids are home by 3 and the chaos then starts. Until 9 or 10.

No telling what could happen when divorced mom moves out. Could be even worse.

I realize I'm somewhat fussy / high maintenance. But if I'm in MY OWN HOUSE, I expect other people will not bother me and interfere with my peaceful enjoyment of my own home. Is that too much to ask?!!

1,000+ ft frontage will ensure this crap never happens again. Sub life? Not so much. I am NOT. A. SUB. PERSON. All the little screaming demons can drop into the seventh pit of Hell for all I care. Just DON'T. BOTHER. ME. and all will be fine.

Sad that we have to bail on our dream home and start all over since our freaking neighbors cannot simply keep to their damn selves.

PSA for those with screaming kids - think..am I possibly bothering my neighbors? Something to think about..

 

[Ready]

I was in a similar situation last year. What really helped me was to remind myself how much I am actually left with after paying taxes on the income. If you focus on the "gross" number it sounds like a boatload of money, but if you look at how much you have left after taxes it's not quite as painful to give up.

You can also look forward to the following year, when you will have no income, and therefore will owe little or no taxes. It's really nice to not owe the government anything, after paying them so much for so many years.

 

[whatnot]

Congratulations on your decision!! If the bull market continues it can shorten your OMY issue.

 

[lhamo]

You seriously need to get a handle on your stress levels -- both about work and about the neighbors. Is any of it worth having a heart attack over? Hope you have a big insurance policy so your wife won't be left destitute if you keel over before you are able to retire. Sorry to be blunt but my dad died of a heart attack at 51, when I was just 15. Work stress played a big role. He had planned to retire at 55.

 

[ivinsfan]

So, after MUCH agonizing (to the point it damn near killed both of us)..we're moving forward with the purchase and close mid next week.

I'll need to w*rk the rest of this year, and DW will need to w*rk through June -just to pay for the properties (2) and the architect, plus our 2018 expenses. Then, we can "roughly" trade current house for new house.

After that, I'll probably need to W*rk another year for deck, landscape, patio, window treatments, furnishings, ...

Of course, current job SUCKS and I may not make it to June, let alone Dec of 2019. So I may need to find another J*b between now and then (UGH).

HOPEFULLY this will give us the privacy and "spirit" we are looking for.

The two properties together are totally private - roughly 1,000 ft wide at the front..450 at the back..NO-ONE behind us except nature.

Went out there today (sunny blue skies, spring was in the air) and thought "wow..this is beautiful..WTF would you NOT buy this, you dumb Sh!t?").

Very tough decision. Commits me to W*rk for another year, possibly two, which might just kill me.

DW will be done in June.

Wish us luck..we're sure going to need it. Hopefully will be worth all the suffering in the end, when we finally move in, 2 years from now..am optimistic that being on "volunteer" ambulance, 30 minutes from any hospital will not be a fatal decision.

When you are already majorly stressed adding to it can be a recipe for disaster. Why would you not buy the property,well because of the fact you feel 2 years more work might kill you. That's actually a really good reason. I sincerely hope 2 years from now you are healthy and happy in your new home. .....keep us updated on your work and new house...

 

[rayinpenn]

I am sitting here thinking.. (No criticism here a bell doesn’t gong to say any of us made the right choice..)
1. You Hate your job and
2. You are locking yourself into a must have a job until the December after next.

Something about this is very unsettlingly to me. Bottom Line: An extra year or 2 work for some landscaping and a deck? I hope it woks out for you.