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Old 09-17-2013, 06:17 PM   #21
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My ER started a couple of weeks ago. I'm still mostly in the goofing off / piddling about phase, which I understood I would need for awhile. I have not yet started my new exercise routine, new cooking habits, or many other things on my retirement list. I expect it to take 3 to 6 months before I get settled in to a new routine.

Like others, I pay attention to the day of the week so I know when to take out the trash, and to avoid shopping on weekends. My regular Saturday walk/lunch with a retired friend has moved to mid-week to avoid the crowds. I do keep an events calendar in Google Calendar to track lunch appointments with former co-workers, dentist, etc. Some of those I used my work calendar for so I had to switch quickly before I lost track of it all.

As for my new identity, I spent quite a bit of time thinking of my new tagline and expertise to update my linkedin profile. It's all about my retirement hobbies without saying "retired" in bold letters. I don't plan on going back to work but if somebody offers me a hobby-job I'll at least look at it. Meanwhile I'm sure my linkedin update has fueled co-worker jealousy a bit more, and tells the boss I'm serious about not coming back.
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Old 09-17-2013, 07:24 PM   #22
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Six years in and still loving it. Three to four multi-week motor cycle trips each year, a big German Shepherd and a couple of DW vacations to keep the home front happy and safe. Not sure what to do when I can't throw the leg over the Harley any more, but I got time to figure it out.
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Old 09-17-2013, 11:35 PM   #23
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enjoying this thread. got me thinking.

I think I will suffer somewhat of an identity crisis. That said, I have always had the majority of my network of friends outside of the work realm - just never felt like i should/could get really close with people I work with - conflict of interest? protective? Insecure? Paranoid? Or maybe just moved around a lot so did not "keep" many work colleagues around long enough to grow closer as friends. Who knows, but I am glad that i have a diverse group of friends outside of work so that when I make the cut, I hope not to have that big a shock. A couple of hobbies provide for some good social interaction. I am a very different person "outside" of work and I think that will be fun to let that side of me "out to play"...

Maybe time to be an active F&AM -

I also have a loving wife...i am grateful...and probably her circle of friends becomes my circle of friends.

University town -great suggestion - lots of access to youth

I worry about becoming a "piddler" too, so i think keeping a visible calendar handy (on the fridge for example) helps keep track of "wasted vs productive" time.... I dont want to waste the time that I've worked so hard to capture....

anyway...enjoying the posts. thanks.
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Old 09-17-2013, 11:50 PM   #24
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enjoying this thread. got me thinking.

I think I will suffer somewhat of an identity crisis. That said, I have always had the majority of my network of friends outside of the work realm - just never felt like i should/could get really close with people I work with - conflict of interest? protective? Insecure? Paranoid? Or maybe just moved around a lot so did not "keep" many work colleagues around long enough to grow closer as friends. Who knows, but I am glad that i have a diverse group of friends outside of work so that when I make the cut, I hope not to have that big a shock. A couple of hobbies provide for some good social interaction. I am a very different person "outside" of work and I think that will be fun to let that side of me "out to play"...

Maybe time to be an active F&AM -

I also have a loving wife...i am grateful...and probably her circle of friends becomes my circle of friends.

University town -great suggestion - lots of access to youth

I worry about becoming a "piddler" too, so i think keeping a visible calendar handy (on the fridge for example) helps keep track of "wasted vs productive" time.... I dont want to waste the time that I've worked so hard to capture....

anyway...enjoying the posts. thanks.
Plan on something crazy. I am working with adults learning to read. The people I meet have amazing stories. The tutors and learners are all a breath of fresh air.
Next summer the plan is to get into ESL (english second language). The planet is a big place with lots of diversity. There are new horizons just waiting for us to stumble into them.

I did like the dance ideas that were brought up in this thread (with meetup.com). Darn...this 24 hour day is sooooo limiting.
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Old 09-18-2013, 12:33 AM   #25
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This is so very cool, discussing this stuff. My biggest fear is definitely the idle hours stretching out in front of me with nothing to fill them with. I love being by myself, and now I'm going to be with my beloved, all day, every day...

Seriously though, work have accepted my part time application so I'm going to be working 20 hours from February 2014. I want to keep my brain active so will be going back to university, something that makes my heart beat faster.

Keeping involved and engaged with people I reckon is going to be key. I worry about hubby not having any mates outside of his work but he seems happy enough as he's fit and active and goes off tramping and hiking and mountain biking.

Great discussion!
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Old 09-18-2013, 01:23 AM   #26
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I relish no longer having to act, communicate or frame my thoughts in a certain way which was not natural to me, but which I adopted and maintained for decades as a means to an end.
In retirement, you can be who you want to be, not who you needed to be in order to make a living.

I relish my leisure time, especially those naps after lunch.

My volunteer work is hiking trail maintenance so it is done when and where I choose. Having grown up on the Great Plains where trees only grew near intermittent streams, I now use a crosscut saw to cut dead trees that have fallen onto the trail in heavily wooded wilderness areas, where chain saws are not allowed. With my background, that is something I could not have imagined.

Best wishes to those who are headed towards finding what they like to do in retirement. I hope you find something that is beyond your imagination.
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Old 09-19-2013, 06:58 PM   #27
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Ten weeks in myself. Financially don't need to work, but for some reason thought I should. Started my own consulting company but it is slow going.
Decided for the time being that physical fitness would be my real job. Always wanted to row crew, took it up last month. Fantastic workout to start the day, dropped a few pounds already. This morning I was floating on the lake in my shell feeling the sun and water and being glad I didn't waste this day by being in an office somewhere.
Not sure if I will go back to work or not. Not easy for me as I have worked every year since I was 15, as I'm sure have most of you.
Now thinking my next job may be to pick up my PhD, I have a strong interest in research in a particular area.

Still am not used to the feeling that I should be on the office treadmill for some purpose, like I am not being productive. I feel odd hitting the grocery store in the middle of the day and the new identity aspect is still not resolved. It is a new world out there.
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Old 09-21-2013, 06:48 AM   #28
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Still am not used to the feeling that I should be on the office treadmill for some purpose, like I am not being productive.
Perhaps they have medications to cure that?

I got over it but admittedly it took a while.
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Old 09-21-2013, 07:13 AM   #29
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We are in our 4th year of retirement and are still working out our travel bug while we still have our health and our desire to do so. I expected to need more than this when I ER'ed and volunteered 2 days a week during tax season but I even found that too onerous so haven't repeated it after the first year. (not that I am ruling out doing volunteer work in the future).

Retirement means different things to different people and it is not unusual to take time to find out what suits best, and the beauty of it is that what works today to bring fulfillment may not be the same thing you need tomorrow, but trying out different scenarios can be very enjoyable.
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Old 09-21-2013, 10:34 AM   #30
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This is so very cool, discussing this stuff. My biggest fear is definitely the idle hours stretching out in front of me with nothing to fill them with. I love being by myself, and now I'm going to be with my beloved, all day, every day...
Then it sounds like your challenge is figuring out how to get plenty of "alone time" after retirement! I was a little concerned about that too, but luckily my beloved also needs and enjoys his own alone time. So, it was easy for us to work that out by establishing a routine that works for both of us and allows each of us plenty of alone time.

After almost 4 years of retirement, I am enjoying it so much. There really isn't time to complete everything I want to get done. I still have the same household chores as before, and the laundry and grocery shopping still need to be done regularly as always. To that, I have added a rigorous (to me) gym schedule because after an overly sedentary life, I think it is crucial for me to work on improving my physical capabilities as I age. In addition to chores and the gym I have enough time to engage in my favorite solitary activities daily, and also I spend time with my beloved each day.

I think that the reason I have adjusted so well to retirement, is that I am fundamentally extremely curious. I suppose many INTJ's share this curiousity with me. There are so many topics and ideas that I want to explore during my life, and dealing with the petty day-to-day requirements of a j*b would just get in the way of doing that. Also I am not the type of person to just sit and stare at a wall if not entertained, and really, I doubt that you are, either. At any rate, life is my bowl of cherries and I plan to get the most possible out of it and hope you do too.

As you probably gather, my preference and intent is to never work again. YMMV and that is just fine! Wouldn't life be boring if we were all identical clones of one another.

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We are in our 4th year of retirement and are still working out our travel bug while we still have our health and our desire to do so. I expected to need more than this when I ER'ed and volunteered 2 days a week during tax season but I even found that too onerous so haven't repeated it after the first year. (not that I am ruling out doing volunteer work in the future).
Like you, I thought I would need more in retirement than I do. I halfway expected to volunteer, but so far I just don't have the time for it.

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Retirement means different things to different people and it is not unusual to take time to find out what suits best, and the beauty of it is that what works today to bring fulfillment may not be the same thing you need tomorrow, but trying out different scenarios can be very enjoyable.
Well said!
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Old 09-24-2013, 04:20 PM   #31
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Thank you guys for your responses.
The next step is to find something that offers exposure to youthful energy. I am not sure what this should be, but only ten weeks in...I have time.
PTO, Big Brothers, Big Sisters, Habitat for Humanity, Docent at the Arizona Museum of Natural History for the Gold Panning/Dino Dig exhibit (Gold Panning/Dino Dig Pit - Arizona Museum of Natural History - Mesa - Arizona - myVolunteerPage.com)

Volunteer coach for youth sports.

volunteer for the Arizona parks Arizona State Parks: Volunteer Programs


Now please throw me a bone, what OMY again?
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Old 09-24-2013, 04:54 PM   #32
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PTO, Big Brothers, Big Sisters, Habitat for Humanity, Docent at the Arizona Museum of Natural History for the Gold Panning/Dino Dig exhibit (Gold Panning/Dino Dig Pit - Arizona Museum of Natural History - Mesa - Arizona - myVolunteerPage.com)

Volunteer coach for youth sports.

volunteer for the Arizona parks Arizona State Parks: Volunteer Programs


Now please throw me a bone, what OMY again?
Very good ideas, thanks. I will look into these as soon as my schedule as a literacy volunteer becomes stable. The museum is a very interesting.

OMY One-more-year. An affliction where the afflicted postpones a big decision like retirement one year at a time. Why does this form of procrastination choose a year increment? Scientists have not uncovered that yet.
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Old 09-24-2013, 05:00 PM   #33
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Only 18 weeks into ER. Mornings are great, but the afternoons are starting to test my mental state. I get up around 5am to start my day and enjoy my coffee, news and checking-in different forums online. However after lunch time I have to admit I'm starting to get a little bored. ....
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Uh....after lunch is nap time, bud
That, plus stop getting up at 5 am - you're retired and can sleep in (you have earned the privilege). Besides, if you keep getting up at 5am you'll make us other ERs look like a bunch of slackers.
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Old 09-24-2013, 05:56 PM   #34
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That, plus stop getting up at 5 am - you're retired and can sleep in (you have earned the privilege). Besides, if you keep getting up at 5am you'll make us other ERs look like a bunch of slackers.
5:00 AM? Heavens no I am not going to sleep in that late. Maybe in the winter. But then again, Arizona does not practice DST.
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Old 09-24-2013, 07:18 PM   #35
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I'm about 6 weeks in to ER. I've found that pulling the plug at MegaTechCorp was a lot like getting out of a bad relationship - you need to get completely away from it for a while and let go, then make some adjustments and settle into a new life where the relationship feels like a thing of the past. I feel that transition occurring - I'm finally getting used to not dreading Sunday nights any more, and it's sinking in that the w*rk stuff that used to matter doesn't matter anymore, and I'm not just on vacation.

I've rarely been bored or felt unfulfilled since I pulled the plug, whereas both of those feelings were very prevalent when I was w*rking. The days go by quickly, and I've had plenty of things to do, even though I haven't settled into a routine - just doing whatever I feel like doing.
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Old 09-24-2013, 08:03 PM   #36
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Great info! it has been 5 weeks for me,since my ER. I was so structured in my megajob...and I find i am still in my ER (it sounds like you are too..with your list!). I definitely need a calendar MORE these days,as every day is different..with a preplanned event. I am still 'scared' of nothing concrete and planned to do,on a weekday...so there is always at least one planned event. This is either a gym class,or a coffee get together...or a hiking group...etc etc. some of these 'events' are via Meetups...which i love. I am waiting for all of this to start to seem 'normal'...as it still feels like I am 'waiting' for something. I need to learn to just 'relax'. I do wish I shared your 'no more worries about money', as I am still watching mine very carefully. As you see, I still need to 'Control'.
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Old 09-24-2013, 08:08 PM   #37
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I enjoyed this post immensely!!! thanks!
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Old 09-24-2013, 10:58 PM   #38
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I'm about 6 weeks in to ER. I've found that pulling the plug at MegaTechCorp was a lot like getting out of a bad relationship - you need to get completely away from it for a while and let go, then make some adjustments and settle into a new life where the relationship feels like a thing of the past. I feel that transition occurring - I'm finally getting used to not dreading Sunday nights any more, and it's sinking in that the w*rk stuff that used to matter doesn't matter anymore, and I'm not just on vacation.

I've rarely been bored or felt unfulfilled since I pulled the plug, whereas both of those feelings were very prevalent when I was w*rking. The days go by quickly, and I've had plenty of things to do, even though I haven't settled into a routine - just doing whatever I feel like doing.
The 'bad relationship' metaphor is striking. I cried often on the final day. I had not broken a relationship off like that in over 30 years. Your words ring true.

Sundays are very different...as are Fridays.

I predict that you will soon fall into some sort of routine. It may be a few items per week or a full (or semi-full) schedule.

I do find the need to overcommit my time but I am resisting.
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Old 09-24-2013, 11:19 PM   #39
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Great info! it has been 5 weeks for me,since my ER. I was so structured in my megajob...and I find i am still in my ER (it sounds like you are too..with your list!). I definitely need a calendar MORE these days,as every day is different..with a preplanned event. I am still 'scared' of nothing concrete and planned to do,on a weekday...so there is always at least one planned event. This is either a gym class,or a coffee get together...or a hiking group...etc etc. some of these 'events' are via Meetups...which i love. I am waiting for all of this to start to seem 'normal'...as it still feels like I am 'waiting' for something. I need to learn to just 'relax'. I do wish I shared your 'no more worries about money', as I am still watching mine very carefully. As you see, I still need to 'Control'.
I try to make scheduled activities all about new relationships ( ..and fostering a few older ones but that seems to be a given) Then its off to new relationships. How are you going to to replace those valuable office relationships?

The money thing is a state of mind thing. I convinced myself that either I had enough or I had to go back to work. Decide and go. We decided that we have 'enough'. We monitor but try not to worry. We have a written plan to help us if worry becomes an issue.

I have friend who retired at 56 and intends on reentering at 61. Crazy talk as far as I am concerned. If you take 5 years off your work ethic it too 'new and improved'. Retire...if you need gifts for the grandkids then work st Walmart over Christmas!

Congrats to you 2RE!
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Old 09-25-2013, 08:01 AM   #40
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I'm not far behind at 8 weeks RE'd. Still plenty on the todo list but they are all minor things. Still, a minor thing has become an all day, or 2, project, so they should last another month or 2. After that I have old hobbies I can see if I still enjoy, with the coming of winter I'll be house bound for a good while so I'll need something to do. The DW still works part time so escaping to warmer climes is not an option at this point, but is in the planning stage.

I have thought about looking for PT work as xmas help, this would fill a couple months of cold time as well as seeing what it's like working with customers.
I like the volunteering idea and will look into that as well.

I do still fret a bit over $, unfortunately only history will tell. The best laid plans etc etc...
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