Things To Do Before You Die

[haha]

Ive read some of those lists and I cant help but wonder why you guys cant do a lot of those things while working. *Do I just have an unusual job, that includes leave and no more than standard full time? *Perhaps ER isnt really appropriate for a job like mine. *Perhaps ER is only for hard jobs and/or ones with high stress/long work hours. *

I dunno. * Still debating what's right for me.

Try reading between the lines of some posts here. Many people were more or less pushed out, or would have had to take some ego hits to hang on. They had saved a meaningful amount of money, so they left. In my case, I had liability exposure that was more troubling as my net worth increased, so I opted to leave. There may have been better responses to this particular issue. Once you are gone, it is hard to return for institutional as well as personal reasons. Did you ever play high school sports? Remember how hard it was to get back into serious training after a layoff?

Another group is not exactly retired. They are non-working spouses of workers. This may be nice work if you can get it, but I would imagine also has its stresses, both current and possible. Like becoming a non-working ex-spouse.

Plenty people enjoy work and would not enjoy giving up even a little of what it offers. These people are not represented on this board for obvious reasons. Some spouses of board posters seem to fit this mold.

As to freedom to do what you want, you may have more with your current setup than you would with much less money, and more time.

Some of us are grounded by family ties, lack of funds, or even dogs.

If I were in your place my course would be very plain. Save money, but don't practice so much denial that you cease to enjoy your life and work. You can always exit- it's reversing that decision that can be hard.

I think advice is cheap, including this. But remember, if one has made a more or less irreversible decision it can lessen some of the associated anxiety to recruit others to one's position.

One thing I can absolutely tell you from my own experience. I read what some here say they spend, and I think it must be in some other universe. I don't doubt their truthfulness, I just don't fathom how it can be done and still enjoy daily life.

Horses for courses, right?

Mikey

[panhead]

Sharon Stone......Basic Instinct..... Yeah, there's a lot of that movie that sticks in my mind as well, especially the "classsic" scene !!

-Pan-

[Martha]

Make a daily walk to the mail box, mumbling in Norwegian, pick up my dividend checks and ride my scooter to the bank to deposit the checks.

Martha

[Jane]

The topic os this post was things to do before you die. Not things to do after you are retired.

Exactly.

Stuff on my list will most likely be done before I retire. After those are done, I will make another list of 5 things to do before I die. Snowboarding on mountains is something I want to do before I hopefully turn 35 (er...I heard that broken bones don't really heal after that *).

To me I am really working towards FI. I like my job now although there are times in my line of work when it is stressful and the hours are long. However, I can't guarantee that in 15, 20 yrs or whatever, I will still like my job (or whatever job I am working on at that moment). If I am FI, I can CHOOSE to leave or stay, and that is the kind of card I want to have on my deck.

Jane

[retire@40]

Some people are just worth a lot and by the time your 50 or so, its probably very hard to voluntarily give up the benefit of being worth 30-40 dollars/hour or more. *Great jobs usually dont just fall in people's laps. *A lot of blood and sweat goes into getting those, so I suspect they're not so easily given up, whether one has the means to do so or not. *

That's a good debatable point. But, the way I look at it, every hour of my life is priceless. I even hate wasting a lot of hours sleeping. No matter how good of a job you have, you are still giving those precious hours of your life to your "boss." I am self-employed with very flexible work hours, but I still feel that I'm dedicating those hours to my clients when I could be dedicating them to my family and myself. Even if you say you "only " work 36 hours a week, to me those are 36 hours of your life that you need to put yourself in a specific building behind a specific desk or inside a specific cubicle.

I understand you worked hard to get a good paying job, but is it worth making that job your life? When I used to work at a comfortable high paying job (before becoming self-employed), there were many times I would say I wish I could have been out fishing or at the beach instead of finishing a job for my boss. I even hated terms like "boss" or "supervisor" or that I had to go through "training." (Still gives me the shivers)

So, I know most people can probably do most of what is on their "Things to do before they die" list while they are still working, but the point is why give up those few precious hours of your life to a job when you can enjoy every one of those hours doing something you enjoy more than your job? Why live your life with a "boss" giving your orders or being "trained" like a dog.

The trap that a lot of people fall into is that they dedicate so much of their life to their jobs and careers, that they lose interest in the curiosities of life. Their work becomes their life and their life becomes their work. They tend not to have diverse hobbies or interests and many of them die at 65 when they retire because when the job goes, they feel (consciously or subconsciously) like everything they worked for is gone.

My feeling is my job is a sacrifice I need to make to get me to a point where I could live every hour of it in total freedom. I like my self-employment job, but I like total freedom a lot more.

I had the "job of a lifetime" just fall in my lap. But, I was
already 53 years old and in my head/heart I was
long gone. Turned it down flat. No regrets.

John Galt

[Jarhead*]

[quote]


Another group is not exactly retired. They are non-working spouses of workers. This may be nice work if you can get it, but I would imagine also has its stresses, both current and possible. Like becoming a non-working ex-spouse.

Mikey: Excellent post, and good advice to that young poster.
About 20 years ago, one of my co-workers, then age 41, married an anesthesiologist. He retired two years later. His wife still has a practice, and he is still "retired".
If he would have had access to this board years ago, he was the type of person that would have painted a wonderful picture of "early retirement".
Not making judgement calls, as whatever works for a married couple, (especially with the divorce rate is as high as it is), is up to them.
As you stated, reading between the lines is in order for a lot of young posters.

This is a good issue (ERed with a working spouse).
I ERed when I was married, then was ERed and
single for 3 years and then remarried. My current spouse has always worked (5 years younger). Not too sure how long this will continue but it has not been a
problem so far. Now, my ex, thinks it is just awful that
my dear wife gets up and goes to work while I loaf.
Just one reason she is my "ex"

John Galt

[SDY888]

Here are the major items on my list:

Be a good Dad and a good Husband.
Have a second child.
Get the kids education fund fully financed before they first attend school.
Teach an illiterate adult to read and write.
Learn Mandarin Chinese.

Spend a month in a Tibetan Monastery.
Take the Train from Hong Kong to Moscow (HK to Beijing Express - Trans Manchurian Railway - Trans-Siberian Railway).
Visit Northern Scandinavia to see the Aurora Borealis.
Drive the Paris - Dakar Rally (or alternatively, drive the route of the Paris - Dakar Rally the week after!)
Drive a camper van from Perth to Melbourne to Darwin.
Visit the Taj Mahal.
See the Pyramids and the Valley of the Kings in Egypt and Petra in Jordan and then travel the Silk Road through the Middle East and Central Asia to China
See the Okavango Delta and the Ngorogoro
Visit Machu Picchu and other Inca regions
Visit the Grand Canyon.
Visit Tristan da Cunha.
Smoke a pre-Castro Cohiba Esplendido in Havana.
Build my own retirement house (in Southern France).

Simon888

[Bob_Smith]

One thing I can absolutely tell you from my own experience. I read what some here say they spend, and I think it must be in some other universe.

Good post Mikey (as usual). Another thing I've noticed: We often see folks post a list of their assets along with a request for input. They sometimes get advice to "quit now", despite a lack of important information about them (age, expenses/location, family obligations, health care access, investment knowledge, pension details, risk tolerance, etc.). There's a lot of advice dispensed here, but it often provides only a tiny sliver of the whole picture based upon some very individualized circumstances that may not apply to the advice seeker.

[sgeeeee]

Make a daily walk to the mail box, mumbling in Norwegian, pick up my dividend checks and ride my scooter to the bank to deposit the checks.

Martha

Ah Ha. . . unclemick's Norwegian widow has come forward. Now maybe we can hear the details of that story he keeps alluding to.

Of course another possibility is that now that unclemick has gone insane, maybe Martha is just another one of his personalites.

[unclemick]

Sigh ---- one more time ---over thirty years ago, perhaps more, after one of those market downturns - ? 66 ? - a financial editorial in a Pacific Northwest paper? Seattle? - rediscovered dividends - aka a thrify Nowegian will put a Scotsman to shame - has the patience wait by the mailbox for her dividend checks. Like Mark Twain - there are versions, the fog of memory, and embelishments in the retelling.

When I got off the kingergaren bus in 1948. by the mailboxes in Kelso - her name was Wright(aka Andersen) - years later - she paid decently and on time to mow her lawn.

History (in contrast to tall tales) records.
Gerald Weiss started Investment Quality Trends around 1967 - didn't write: Dividends Don't Lie until 1988?

Heh, heh - Probably not Norwegian and lived in Califirnia - Hmmm - go figure.

I get Moneypaper(Vita Nelson) for my DRIP list and Mergent's Dividend Achievers to winnow it down.

Real stocks are best picked by women - they are better investors.

Men have hormones and fun stocks -like Warren Buffett's 215 orangutans in his 1984 Columbia University lecture or Ben Graham's Postscript in his 4th ed., Intelligent Investor.

[azanon]

The topic os this post was things to do before you die. Not things to do after you are retired.

Yes it was, but when i opened the thread to read what the original poster had to say, here was his first comment: "I've never understood why more people don't have a goal to retire early." ...... Sorry, didnt know it was off limits to maybe try and answer/expand on that.

Mikey, great response btw, and it was insightful. With regards to your suggestion to me of reading between the lines, I often get in trouble when i'm presumptious, and really didnt see the harm in asking that straight up given the inherent anonymonity of a message board. Your response to me was very insightful and I dont think I would have picked up on all of that had I not asked.

It's pretty easy for me to pick the Number One "thing
to do before I die". It's to raise the best kids possible
(that task is almost complete) and then to maintain
the best possible relationship with them. Nothing in my
life can be more important than that.

John Galt

[Jarhead*]

Cutthroat:

I wasn't taking a shot at anybody on my post. If you read Mikeys post, and my answer to it, was that you had to be careful when taking advice from someone on the board, because the playing field is not always level.
By the way, I noticed that you had added to your original post.
It is not required that you explain your situation to anybody on this board. What works for you and your wife is your business.

I either did not explain my intent of my post, or you mis-interpred it. In any case, I am going to drop back ten yards and punt from this discussion.
Regards, Jarhead

[haha]

Thanks Jarhead, Bob Smith and Azanon for your comments.

In many ways these boards are like real life. One can all too easily step in doo-doo and accidentally offend.

I don't want to offend anybody, and when I say something it rarely if ever is in specific reference to any other individual on the board. Unless of course I am feeling hurt myself.

Mikey

[riverrat]

Just wondering if any of you feel a kind of anxiety about not doing all or some of the things on your to-do list. My list is quite long and it includes doin nothing and just relaxing which can conflict with gettin to the active part of the list like snorkeling in Hawaii, or kayaking a river I haven't done or sightseeing.

My list of things to do falls into in three general categories - passive, active and adventure.

Passive=tv, computer, reading...
Active = hiking, ball games, museums, day trippin...
Adventure= kayaking, scuba diving, snorkeling, or tryin something new I haven't done before but would like to try ie caving, sky diving, bungee jumpin.

Besides all these self-centered things I want to do and experience comes a more important need to do some good for others just be a good husband, Dad, and grandfather.

After two months of retirement I'm finding that life is quite busy even without working 40hrs/wk. Now I'm off over the hill to Santa Cruz with my wife and our little dog.

[Nords]

Just wondering if any of you feel a kind of anxiety about not doing all or some of the things on your to-do list.

I used to but now my spouse is handling that job just fine. I think the first couple years of ER unleash a tremendous push to catch up on everything you've been denied during your "working" years.

And sometimes it's just trying to recover from being programmed to eat your vegetables before you reward yourself with dessert. I usually awake at 4 AM with my brain racing to start the day. It lasts until about noon, then after a nap I'm able to relax & take it easy. In ER, it's my fault if there's too much on my plate.

After two months of retirement I'm finding that life is quite busy even without working 40hrs/wk.

I still can't comprehend how I did everything that needed doing and still "found" the time to go to work. Clearly something was being neglected, but what?!?

[cute fuzzy bunny]

I dont think anything was neglected. I just move a hell of a lot slower now and do things differently.

I also used to pay a lot of people to do a lot of stuff I do myself now.

Being a total Type A, I have to continuously
restrain myself from adding to my TO-DO list
and/or trying to do it all in one day, like I did
for decades. I also have to remember that doing nothing is really doing something. Today for example
I have done almost nothing really productive
(well, I fed the dogs )
I slept very late and then fished until about 2 p.m.
Came home and cleaned the fish (7), putzed on
the computer, and now I am going to clean up
and get ready to dine with friends later. That was
my day. It's a pretty good life.

John Galt