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Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-13-2006, 11:56 AM   #1
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Thoughts On Aging

I am going to go hear this author speak today. Here is an excert from her new book.

I Feel Bad About My Neck: And Other Thoughts on Being a Woman
by Nora Ephron

WHAT I WISH I'D KNOWN...

People have only one way to be.

Buy, donít rent.

Never marry a man you wouldnít want to be divorced
from.

Donít cover a couch with anything that isnít more or
less beige.

Donít buy anything that is 100 percent wool even if it
seems to be very soft and not particularly itchy when
you try it on in the store.

You canít be friends with people who call after 11 p.m.

Block everyone on your instant mail.

The worldís greatest babysitter burns out after two and
a half years.

You never know.

The last four years of psychoanalysis are a waste of
money.

The plane is not going to crash.

Anything you think is wrong with your body at the age
of thirty-five you will be nostalgic for at the age of forty-
five.

At the age of fifty-five you will get a saggy roll just
above your waist even if you are painfully thin.

This saggy roll just above your waist will be especially
visible from the back and will force you to reevaluate
half the clothes in your closet, especially the white
shirts.

Write everything down.

Keep a journal.

Take more pictures.

The empty nest is underrated.

You can order more than one dessert.

You canít own too many black turtleneck sweaters.

If the shoe doesnít fit in the shoe store, itís never going
to fit.

When your children are teenagers, itís important to have
a dog so that someone in the house is happy to see you.

Back up your files.

Overinsure everything.

Whenever someone says the words ďOur friendship is
more important than this,Ē watch out, because it almost
never is.

Thereís no point in making piecrust from scratch.

The reason youíre waking up in the middle of the night
is the second glass of wine.

The minute you decide to get divorced, go see a lawyer
and file the papers.

Overtip.

Never let them know.

If only one third of your clothes are mistakes, youíre
ahead of the game.

If friends ask you to be their childís guardian in case
they die in a plane crash, you can say no.

There are no secrets.
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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-13-2006, 12:15 PM   #2
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

She wrote the screenplay for When Harry Met Sally--funny and interesting dialogue in that movie, which I really enjoyed.
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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-13-2006, 12:35 PM   #3
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

Yes, I guess I should have mentioned her credits...

Nora Ephron is also the author of Wallflower at the Orgy. She received Academy Award nominations for Best Original Screenplay for When Harry Met Sally..., Silkwood, and Sleepless in Seattle, which she also directed. Her other credits include the film Michael and the play Imaginary Friends. She lives in New York City with her husband, writer Nicholas Pileggi.
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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-13-2006, 12:59 PM   #4
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

I may have to go look for that book.
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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-13-2006, 01:00 PM   #5
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

Quote:
Anything you think is wrong with your body at the age
of thirty-five you will be nostalgic for at the age of forty-
five.
So true.

Then there's that day, somewhere between 40 and 50, when you look in the mirror and say to yourself: "When did that happen?"

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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-13-2006, 01:31 PM   #6
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

My thoughts on aging? DON'T DO IT!!
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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-13-2006, 01:36 PM   #7
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

Quote:
Originally Posted by Andre1969
My thoughts on aging? DON'T DO IT!!
I suppose you are one of those who believe it has a limited future...

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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-13-2006, 03:14 PM   #8
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

Truly, I don't feel any different from how I felt at age 30 (now 57). I think I'm smarter, though .

Physically I'm not able to do what I could before as fast or as much, but I can do all I want and am still an avid exerciser, can still enjoy all the pleasures. The hairline has retreated, and I'm a little gray, but .... that's about it.

Alas, I'm truly well aware of my vulnerability as a middle-aged man. My time will come to fade or fail, but so far age is just not something that has gotten in the way. Thank heavens; guess I'm just counting my blessings while they last.
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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-13-2006, 03:31 PM   #9
 
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rich_in_Tampa
Truly, I don't feel any different from how I felt at age 30 (now 57).
That's just the early Alzheimer's talking.
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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-13-2006, 05:07 PM   #10
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

Quote:
Originally Posted by Cut-Throat
That's just the early Alzheimer's talking.


Yup. Happily oblivious.
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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-13-2006, 05:31 PM   #11
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

im only as young as the women i feel...
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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-13-2006, 06:51 PM   #12
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

i was just about to respond with my thoughts on aging, but i forgot what i was going to say.
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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-13-2006, 07:56 PM   #13
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

Interesting talk by Nora. She knows everyone. Was married to Carl Bernstein of "All the Presidents Men". Worked with Mike Nichols of "The Graduate" fame. Was an intern in the Jack Kennedy White house (about which she wrote, "Wallflower at the Orgy".

After her divorce from Bernstein she wrote "Heartburn" about the breakup. It was painful to go through she said but,"The book bought me a beautiful house in the Hamptons".

I always seem to be the only man at these things. Over 150 women and six men by my count this time. Was the same with Francis Mayes who wrote "Under the Tuscan Sun" and Elaine Bronco (the shrink on the Sopranos).

I only go to the ones that interest me. But always looking for artist's insights into the world. Her insights...

She said that as a child anything bad that happened to her she couldn't share with her mother. The mother would just say, "That's copy, you will use it later and I will read about it. Don't spoil it by telling me now." By now she has turned a lot of "copy" into a lot of success.

Also, own your flaws. Don't let anyone else use them against you. If you get to them first they will be out of luck.

boont
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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-13-2006, 10:53 PM   #14
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

Mens Thoughts on Aging

* When you pick up the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue while waiting at the barber for your haircut and get upset that they leave out your favorite bass fishing column, your getting older.

* When your spouse speaks about getting divorced, you realize the wisdom of buying an RV two years ago.

* The empty nest means you have to mow your own grass.

* Finally you can go to a Lodge bingo night and she knows thats where she can find you if she looks.

8)
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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-13-2006, 11:04 PM   #15
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

Quote:
Originally Posted by boont
WHAT I WISH I'D KNOWN...
That reminds me a lot of the Mary Schmich "Wear Sunscreen Speech"* (that got attributed to Kurt Vonnegut):


Ladies and gentlemen of the class of '97.

Wear Sunscreen.

If I could offer you only one tip for the future, sunscreen would be it. The long-term benefits of sunscreen have been proved by scientists, whereas the rest of my advice has no basis more reliable than my own meandering experience. I will dispense this advice now.

Enjoy the power and beauty of your youth. Oh, never mind. You will not understand the power and beauty of your youth until they've faded. But trust me, in 20 years, you'll look back at photos of yourself and recall in a way you can't grasp now how much possibility lay before you and how fabulous you really looked. You are not as fat as you imagine.

Don't worry about the future. Or worry, but know that worrying is as effective as trying to solve an algebra equation by chewing bubble gum. The real troubles in your life are apt to be things that never crossed your worried mind, the kind that blindside you at 4 pm on some idel Tuesday. Do one thing every day that scares you.

Sing.

Don't be reckless with other people's hearts. Don't put up with people who are reckless with yours.

Floss.

Don't waste your time on jealousy. Sometimes you're ahead, sometimes you're behind. The race is long and, in the end, it's only with yourself. Remember compliments you receive. Forget the insults. If you succeed in doing this, tell me how. Keep your old love letters. Throw away your old bank statements.

Stretch.

Don't feel guilty if you don't know what you want to do with your life. The most interesting people I know didn't know at 22 what they wanted to do with their lives. Some of the most interesting 40-year- olds I know still don't. Get plenty of calcium. Be kind to your knees. You'll miss them when they're gone. Mayber you'll marry, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll have children, maybe you won't. Maybe you'll divorce at 40, maybe you'll dance the funky chicken on your 75th wedding anniversary. Whatever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either. Your choices are half chance. So are everybody's else's.

Enjoy your body. Use it every way you can. Dont' be afraid of it or of what other people think of it. It's the greatest instrument you'll ever own.

Dance, even if you have nowhere to do it but your living room.

Read the directions, even if you don't follow them.

Do not read beauty magazines. They will only make you feel ugly.

Get to know your parents. You never know when they'll be gone for good. Be nice to your siblings. They're your best link to your past and the people most likely to stick with you in the future.

Understand that friends come and go, but with a precious few you should hold on. Work hard to bridge the gaps in geography and lifestyle, because the older you get, the more you need the people who knew you when you were young.

Live in New York City once, but leave before it makes you hard. Live in Northern California once, but leave before it makes you soft. Travel.

Accept certain inalienable truths. Prices will rise. Politicians will philander. You, too will get old. And when you do, you'll fantasize that when you were young, prices were reasonable, politicians were noble, and children respected their elders.

Respect your elders.

Don't expect anyone else to support you. Maybe you have a trust fund. Maybe you'll have a wealthy spouse. But you never know when either one might run out.

Don't mess too much with your hair or by the time you're 40 it will Look 85. Be careful whose advice you buy, but be patient with those who supply it. Advice is a form of nostalgia. Dispensing it is a way of fishing the past from the disposal, wiping it off, painting over the ugly parts and recycling it for more than it's worth.

But trust me on the sunscreen.

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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-14-2006, 12:00 AM   #16
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

On the sunscreen thing. I remember who started that and it was Ted Turner. He made that remark at a college graduation ceremony for which he gave the key note speech. Might have been Harvard. Ivy League at least.

He had gotten skin cancer from all his sailing.

I saw the speech somewhere and could never understand why no one picked up on the Ted Turner origin.

boont
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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-14-2006, 03:23 AM   #17
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

women love us older men for all our great maturity and deep emotional insight ///////ha ha ha ha
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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-14-2006, 06:41 AM   #18
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

I stopped by Amazon to check out the book and the reviews, it seemed about 50/50 for and against her. I decided I'll check the library instead of purchasing.
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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-14-2006, 07:54 AM   #19
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

Quote:
Originally Posted by boont

...Elaine Bronco (the shrink on the Sopranos).
I believe it is Lorraine Bracco. She also imports wines under her name.
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Re: Thoughts On Aging
Old 09-14-2006, 08:30 AM   #20
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Re: Thoughts On Aging

Don't do it; There's no future in it.
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