Tough Day at Work

[Jimmie]

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Originally Posted by RetireSoon If it helps, I'm not yet in ER but can totally relate - just about every day is like that in my gig. SOMEONE is always angry about something - and takes it out on me. Sometimes, that happens pretty aggressively, like just 2 days ago for me where I had a co-worker literally yelling on the phone at me. It's increasingly hard to put up with since I'm FI and plan to RE this year. My "put up with you" level is dropping precipitously to the point I might just get myself FIREd in a different way because I just don't put up with people's crap any longer. As an example, I told the yelling guy that his tone was "not acceptable whatsoever" and that I was not going to have the conversation with him if he couldn't dial it back. The abuse continued for another 5 minutes or so but he eventually got it. Still very stressful and very annoying. Unfortunately, the stress levels are also off the map as a result and I haven't yet found a healthy way to deal with it all..

Amen Brother. In same shoes as you, minus the yelling. Expectations are higher than what's realistic. It's a struggle every morning to get into work. Read this yesterday and will try their suggestions:

https://www.marketwatch.com/story/ho...ire-2018-06-21

[ExFlyBoy5]

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Originally Posted by ImThinkin2019 I am just over 60 and financially OK. No problem. But I keep telling myself I like work.

Keep telling yourself that. W*rk is just that and nothing more.

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Originally Posted by ImThinkin2019 I thought it might bring back memories for some of you.

Just helped me appreciate the fact that I don't have to deal with the buffoonery of w*rk anymore.

[CoolRich59]

Nope. After 5 months those memories are fading fast (but not fast enough! )

The other day, I was talking to my son and something he said reminded me of a former cow@rker that I had dealt with almost every day for the last two years before ER -- and I could not even recall her name!

[Dtail]

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Originally Posted by CoolRich59 Nope. After 5 months those memories are fading fast (but not fast enough! ) The other day, I was talking to my son and something he said reminded me of a former cow@rker that I had dealt with almost every day for the last two years before ER -- and I could not even recall her name!

Way to go. Love this retirement life.

[ImThinkin2019]

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Originally Posted by RetireSoon If it helps, I'm not yet in ER but can totally relate - just about every day is like that in my gig. SOMEONE is always angry about something - and takes it out on me. Sometimes, that happens pretty aggressively, like just 2 days ago for me where I had a co-worker literally yelling on the phone at me. It's increasingly hard to put up with since I'm FI and plan to RE this year. My "put up with you" level is dropping precipitously to the point I might just get myself FIREd in a different way because I just don't put up with people's crap any longer. As an example, I told the yelling guy that his tone was "not acceptable whatsoever" and that I was not going to have the conversation with him if he couldn't dial it back. The abuse continued for another 5 minutes or so but he eventually got it. Still very stressful and very annoying. Unfortunately, the stress levels are also off the map as a result and I haven't yet found a healthy way to deal with it all..

Thank you so much for this. It's great to have someone going through similar things.

Today is a better day. More and more it's an emotional roller coaster.

As you are, I'm tolerating poor treatment less and less now. No reason for people not to be civil with each other!!!!

Anyway, all the people reporting what it's like on the other side give me hope. Thanks to all of you.

[Scrapr]

As a business owner it is nice to be able to pick your battles. If a contractor verbally abuses our employees they get fired. The contractor, not the employee. Stress level goes way down. Typically it is an emergency on the contractor's part as they forgot to get us in before their next trade in. Prior poor planning is not an emergency on my part

We do not work for the National builders in our market. They have emergencies every week because they are not organized and don't plan. It's part of their culture. Then they yell at our employees and our dispatch. No employee deserves that treatment

[Chuckanut]

OP... How do you think that stress is affecting your health? That is reallhy the big question, IMHO.

[ImThinkin2019]

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Originally Posted by Chuckanut OP... How do you think that stress is affecting your health? That is reallhy the big question, IMHO.

Hmm. I have to think about that. I do like many things about my job - mostly interaction with people. But the stress is a factor.

Makes me recall many postings where newly retired people report "lost weight, slept better"....

[scrabbler1]

I have been retired for nearly 10 years and I don't miss it at all. Overall, I did like my job, though. What killed me was the dang commute on the trains, even as little as 2 days a week in the last 17 months of my 23 year career (I worked part-time for at most 20 hours a week for the last 7 years). In the last 10 years, I have ridden the LIRR exactly 3 times (round-trips), never during the rush hour.


My contact with former coworkers has been mostly limited to one friend/coworker I speak with a few times a year. The last time we spoke, he told me he plans to retire later this year at age 60, as he has become sick and tired of the growing BS he has had to put up with.


Some of the job skills I learned in my 23-year career I have been able to carry into my nonwork life, mainly computer skills and writing skills. What I learned about auto insurance (I worked in the actuarial profession), has been useful at times over the years.


But what has interested me less and less in my 10 years of retirement is having to listen to workplace woes from other people such as my ladyfriend and my best (male) friend. I just smile and nod and say, "That sucks" while thinking to myself, "I am sooooooo glad I don't have to deal with that crappola any more."


Similarly, whenever I see a transit report on the news about the LIRR's latest problems, I think to myself, :"I am soooooo glad I don't have to deal with that crappola any more!"

[Amethyst]

My last year of work before retiring, I was doing a weird-hours job with a day supervisor who was really starting to get my goat (meanwhile, I got along great with my weird-hours boss and co-workers).

I mean, I dreaded seeing the woman lumber into the room because I knew I was in for some kind of criticism, and she was also fond of sending passive-aggressive emails that I would see when I logged in for my night shift.

Then the light went on. "You'll be retiring soon, while she's still stuck paying off her house and bucking for her last promotion. She has NO power over you, except what you choose to give her just b/c your stupid upbringing makes you want to please everybody." After that, it was like water off a duck's back.

[bclover]

LOL, actually even though I'm working p/t. it's a different mentality when your FI. I simply smile and know that any time I want to I can skip happily out the door. I long gave up being stressed.

My youngest just graduated from College so I'll probably be leaving soon

[GalaxyBoy]

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Originally Posted by 6miths A classmate and colleague died on Wednesday at 60. She had worked the day before and died in the early morning hours. She was a gentle soul. Sad for her and thankful to be FIREd.

After I FIREd a coworker and friend had an aneurysm while working at home on a Sunday night, slipped into a coma, and died within 24 hours. She was in her mid to late 50s. It certainly reinforced to me that I did the right thing by retiring while I still had my health. I was extremely overworked with unreasonable deadlines and excessive travel, and DW was concerned I might drop dead at any moment.

[UnrealizedPotential]

The memories of work and all its problems fade with time. The letting go of people you used to work with, all the headaches, all the people who you didn't get along with, all those memories fade.


It's been two years for me and not all the memories are gone , but they are fading more and more and I try not to think about work anymore. There just isn't a reason to remember, I know I'm not ever going back again.

[WestUniversity]

I’m now on blood pressure medication. GP and Cardiologist attribute it to stress. Thanks MegaCorp

[emoji856]

[Walt34]

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Originally Posted by bclover LOL, actually even though I'm working p/t. it's a different mentality when your FI. I simply smile and know that any time I want to I can skip happily out the door. I long gave up being stressed.

That's about where I was when I took a job after retirement. It was full time, but had a three mile commute with one traffic light and the job was very low stress. Eventually things did go south there and I and 19 others had the luxury of quitting. A few months later I came across one of the guys I worked with there and he had some horror stories to tell. I would have lasted at most two days before quitting if I had stayed.

[MRG]

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Originally Posted by ImThinkin2019 Hmm. I have to think about that. I do like many things about my job - mostly interaction with people. But the stress is a factor. Makes me recall many postings where newly retired people report "lost weight, slept better"....

Stress hurts those around us to. DW has anxiety and while she can still have an occasional panic attack they're nothing like what she used to have. Takes less meds too.

My last VP did me a favor. He made things so miserable for everyone under him, I left. My manager was a nice guy, if he only had a spine. He was responsible for the stupidity too. He insisted that all 7 people on our team received every hardware page, especially the ones that didn't matter! So a blip on a disk unit that RAID was going to handle and we'd get hundreds of pages all night.

My best, last great time having him dress me down(he was a former Marine) at 3AM was because I missed a page from an individual during one of the mass page attacks. When I found the page it said "call me"! No idea who I was supposed to call. He ripped me a new butt over that, never apologized.

I was going to do another OMY, after a couple of those stupid things happened I changed my mind.

[ImThinkin2019]

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Originally Posted by MRG Stress hurts those around us to. DW has anxiety and while she can still have an occasional panic attack they're nothing like what she used to have. Takes less meds too. My last VP did me a favor. He made things so miserable for everyone under him, I left. My manager was a nice guy, if he only had a spine. He was responsible for the stupidity too. He insisted that all 7 people on our team received every hardware page, especially the ones that didn't matter! So a blip on a disk unit that RAID was going to handle and we'd get hundreds of pages all night. My best, last great time having him dress me down(he was a former Marine) at 3AM was because I missed a page from an individual during one of the mass page attacks. When I found the page it said "call me"! No idea who I was supposed to call. He ripped me a new butt over that, never apologized. I was going to do another OMY, after a couple of those stupid things happened I changed my mind.

Thanks for this. We have improved management so the atmosphere in general is better than before. Someone like a former Marine would help clarify things.

[Redbugdave]

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Originally Posted by REWahoo As others have said, at some point that will no longer be the case. I had lunch last week with a buddy who still works for my old employer and when he told me about some of the problems he was having at work he might as well have been speaking in a foreign language.

I also have lunch sometimes with my retired work friends and some still working. Some of my retired friends won't let go, (they still identify with their position and not who they really are inside). I really do feel sorry for the ones still working, (I was once one of them). I can see the stress and how wrapped up they are in that foolishness. Listening to the work blather is like a foreign language to me now, as well. I will probably quit going to the lunches since it is living in the past. I have a new life now and am unplugged from all that stuff. It was just a job. "I'm glad I did it, partly because it was worth doing, but mostly because I'll never have to do it again."....Mark Twain

[Pellice]

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Originally Posted by WestUniversity I’m now on blood pressure medication. GP and Cardiologist attribute it to stress. Thanks MegaCorp [emoji856]

I am now 99.8% out, but wanted to comment that this happened to me also, in my last 6 or 7 months on the job. I developed high blood pressure for the first time and am on medication. Not quite quick enough in departing.

My sympathy to the OP. That you have the resources to FIRE has to be your great comfort! So many don't.

I will just add, that the FIRE water is fine - no, it's wonderful! I have a couple more days to go into the office and am monitoring projects I have handed off. Watching them start to wander off track and be thankful I don't have to fix the issues. And multiple mailings on efforts to fix tech systems urging everyone to watch video (re)training on processes that management broke. I forward them to my temporary replacement.

[harley]

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Originally Posted by Redbugdave I also have lunch sometimes with my retired work friends and some still working. Some of my retired friends won't let go, (they still identify with their position and not who they really are inside). I really do feel sorry for the ones still working, (I was once one of them). I can see the stress and how wrapped up they are in that foolishness. Listening to the work blather is like a foreign language to me now, as well. I will probably quit going to the lunches since it is living in the past. I have a new life now and am unplugged from all that stuff. It was just a job. "I'm glad I did it, partly because it was worth doing, but mostly because I'll never have to do it again."....Mark Twain

Same here. I have a close friend who is still (but not for long) working for our Megacorp. Often when talking on the phone he tells me about the job he is doing and problems he is having to resolve. When I first FIREd (12 years ago next month) I would listen, be interested, try to help if I could. Over the years the work aspect of our conversations became less interesting, something I just couldn't bring myself to care about. Now it's the Charlie Brown's Teacher sound effect. Luckily that's a very small part of our conversations, and he's retiring in a few months himself. I'm sure he'll go through the same process over time if he stays in touch with former coworkers.