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What advice do you have for a new retiree?
Old 08-19-2016, 10:36 PM   #1
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What advice do you have for a new retiree?

DH and I are planning to RE in less than 90 days. Any advice for transitioning from our full-time j*bs to ER? Not looking for financial tips, but "words of wisdom" from those who have already done this. We're very excited and have lots of ideas, but have been holding off on any committed plans until we experience our new lifestyle.


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Old 08-20-2016, 04:54 AM   #2
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I hope your ideas include thoughts on how you will spend your time, and how you will stay engaged with other people. We get to where we do not want to do our jobs anymore, but in addition to the stuff we have had enough of, they provided some positive things to us as well that are good to sustain in a different way.
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Old 08-20-2016, 05:18 AM   #3
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Find time to spend together and get to know each other as retirees. Life is different without the work routines. Rediscovering each other can be a lot of fun!


Enjoying life!
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Old 08-20-2016, 06:22 AM   #4
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What do you enjoy doing when you are not working? Do more of that until it get tiring and then find other things to do.
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Old 08-20-2016, 10:44 AM   #5
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I really enjoyed taking a vacation (beach for us) starting Monday of the week I RE'd.

Also it's smart not to commit to too much - I overdid it on volunteer commitments the first couple of years and it took awhile to wind that back down.

Finally, enjoy establishing new routines. For example, I never made the bed when we were w*rking (at least not after we had kids - probably did it before then but don't remember) because mornings were so hectic and then later because I left the house before DH got up many days. It took me almost a year to realize that I now had the opportunity to get into a nice made-up bed every evening, and it's now an enjoyable part of my morning every day. (I know, sounds weird). YMMV.
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Old 08-20-2016, 11:09 AM   #6
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My advice, after almost 10 years of retirement, is to let your retirement routine evolve. Determine what you genuinely enjoy doing as opposed to what you (or others) think that you should enjoy. I found that a lot of what I enjoyed while w*rking was a salve for the stress and wasn't necessarily enjoyable after retirement.

I've accepted the fact that I enjoy doing a lot of nothing and that is OK. If someone needs me to do something, I'm there, but "productive" activity for the sake of looking busy or the appearance that I am using my time wisely doesn't cut it with me anymore.

YMMV
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Old 08-20-2016, 11:21 AM   #7
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My advice, after almost 10 years of retirement, is to let your retirement routine evolve. Determine what you genuinely enjoy doing as opposed to what you (or others) think that you should enjoy. I found that a lot of what I enjoyed while w*rking was a salve for the stress and wasn't necessarily enjoyable after retirement.

I've accepted the fact that I enjoy doing a lot of nothing and that is OK. If someone needs me to do something, I'm there, but "productive" activity for the sake of looking busy or the appearance that I am using my time wisely doesn't cut it with me anymore.

YMMV
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Old 08-20-2016, 11:26 AM   #8
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We're very excited and have lots of ideas, but have been holding off on any committed plans until we experience our new lifestyle.
Sounds like a good starting place. You have plenty of things you want to pursue, but not so much structure that you're locked in before you discover your retirement passions.
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Old 08-20-2016, 11:30 AM   #9
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Plan some alone time for each of you. "I married him for better or worse, but not for lunch"
Do not get underfoot, but help with the household chores. My wife hates to vacuum, so I do it when she is having lunch with her friends. I am also the sous chef, helping with the meal preparations.
Develop some outside interests, perhaps do some volunteer work.
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Old 08-20-2016, 11:49 AM   #10
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What travelover said. I and many others found that retirement is nothing like I thought it would be before retirement. Just let it evolve and you'll find your spot.
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Old 08-20-2016, 12:45 PM   #11
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What travelover said. I and many others found that retirement is nothing like I thought it would be before retirement. Just let it evolve and you'll find your spot.

+1. Do things that you enjoy at a relaxing pace. Don't over plan. Let retirement come to you.


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Old 08-20-2016, 01:11 PM   #12
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+1
+2!
Although I have less than half a year of actual experience, this is very much my thinking too
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Old 08-20-2016, 03:52 PM   #13
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If you take up kayaking, buy 2 single kayaks, not a tandem.
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Old 08-20-2016, 04:02 PM   #14
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Expect the unexpected and go with it. No matter how much you plan ahead it will look different on the other side. Some of the things you thought you would do no longer seem important. Other things you never thought of will surprise you.

Other than that I would advise that you have a little bit of structure in your life and endeavor to interact with people at least once or more per week.
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Old 08-20-2016, 05:12 PM   #15
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My advice, after almost 10 years of retirement, is to let your retirement routine evolve. Determine what you genuinely enjoy doing as opposed to what you (or others) think that you should enjoy. I found that a lot of what I enjoyed while w*rking was a salve for the stress and wasn't necessarily enjoyable after retirement.

I've accepted the fact that I enjoy doing a lot of nothing and that is OK. If someone needs me to do something, I'm there, but "productive" activity for the sake of looking busy or the appearance that I am using my time wisely doesn't cut it with me anymore.

YMMV
So well said!

For me, it was helpful to keep my schedule fairly clear of obligations, so that I could fit in doing "a lot of nothing", as travelover put it.

Actually, instead of nothing what I was doing was shedding stress. For some of us the stress shedding takes months to years. It's like peeling an onion - - you get one layer off and then there's another beneath. But you'll get there and it's a lovely task.

Another thing that was helpful to me, was to make a rule that I had to get out of the house every day. Otherwise I might have become a recluse. Being an extreme introvert, I could see that in myself, hence the rule. Also, planning to go out of the house and knowing where I am going, gives my day some structure. For example... "Monday? Why, that's gym day, so F and I will go to the gym, work out, have lunch, and then home." Then the rest of the day falls in place. For me that is better than mentally freezing up, not knowing what to do, and feeling like a fish out of water.

Working on my fitness was a pretty high priority for me. I was shocked to discover first hand what effect years of cubicle life can have on the human body.

We thought we would want to go on long trips by car, but neither of us did. We were too busy getting more fit and shedding stress, and more. Just think about it; for what may be the first time in your life, you can decide how much sleep you need and when. The joys of napping are a luxury that few working people can experience at will.
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Old 08-20-2016, 05:13 PM   #16
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If you take up kayaking, buy 2 single kayaks, not a tandem.
This is what we looked like after our tandem kayak trip
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Old 08-20-2016, 08:41 PM   #17
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TravelLover gave good advise.
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Old 08-20-2016, 08:52 PM   #18
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All that, but don't forget that you'll wake up every morning the same person you were before retiring. It will probably feel like a very long weekend at first. If you got a lot of meaning or identity from work, don't be surprised by a little emptiness. If you retire to something rather than from something, you'll probably be happier.
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Old 08-20-2016, 11:37 PM   #19
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All that, but don't forget that you'll wake up every morning the same person you were before retiring. It will probably feel like a very long weekend at first. If you got a lot of meaning or identity from work, don't be surprised by a little emptiness. If you retire to something rather than from something, you'll probably be happier.
I got a lot of meaning and identity from my work, and my co-workers shared your concerns and told me that I would never be happy retired. Also, I did not retire to something in that sense.

Nevertheless, I was pleasantly surprised to discover that none of the above was even the slightest problem for me. I think it's a case of YMMV. Also, I still feel like it's been a 7 year long weekend, and it has been a great weekend in my opinion.

I do pretty well with big changes and adventures in my life (moved 29 times, for example, traveled almost constantly in my childhood, did a lot of exciting and wildly different things in my life), so maybe that helped? Or maybe it's just me and how I am? Or luck? I have no idea.
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Old 08-21-2016, 12:35 AM   #20
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Great feedback! Thank you all very much. I'm really looking forward to the journey!


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