When does ER get hard?

[truenorth418]

This is the only part that has me a little nervous. I have everything planned out week by week what I will be doing and where I will be through the end of the year (work scheduling) and after that there is just a big blank. No clue what I will do or how I will spend my time, and that is a bit unnerving.

Then I show up for another pointless day in my cube and long for that blank spot...

Why not schedule a few big personal projects or some travel sprinkled across the first few months of your big blank spot. Fill it in a little, don't go crazy.

In my case, I scheduled a 2 month Europe backpacking trip and a holiday with family. I also scheduled a few nights out with old friends. It gave me something to look forward to and plan for.

 

[LoneAspen]

Then I show up for another pointless day in my cube and long for that blank spot...

I know that feeling.

I have about another 18 months to go (give or take) and I detest going into my little prison cell every day, and working on a computer all day. My head is no longer in the game, and I just don't care about the work anymore.

But...golden pair of handcuffs and all that. I literally can't afford to leave before I'm fully vested.

I'm 100% positive FIRE would never get old or hard for me. If I'm going to be bored, I'd much rather be bored doing nothing, than bored doing 40 hours of work a week I find meaningless.

 

[Mulligan]

Wow! Thanks for the encouragement! Great stories, and I can see myself in all of them, even the fretters . Today was just another perfect day. No hurries, no worries, just doing whatever I want to do, or whatever DW wants, not necessarily in that order

This may be unique to me, but man, during the past 3 years of ER, my "work ethic" skills have deteriorated badly. Now, don't get me wrong, I love retirement, but I am amazed out how much less I get done in a day, than what I could accomplish when I was working. Just yesterday, I had a few minor chores to do yesterday that took about an hour and had to do a mad scramble to accomplish the tasks before sundown. The day before, I played a round of golf with a friend. He wanted to meet at 9 at the course. I told him I wouldn't go unless he waited until 10 because I don't like to rush. I imagine it will just get worse. 10 years ago, I would have teed it up a 7 a.m.

 

[Redbugdave]

Even though not retired, (yet), most of my life I have made lists. I make a list of what I want to do each day...at work and at home. That helps keep me focused. However, when I do retire...there's no way in hell I will ever be on any kind of a schedule. I am so sick of having to be somewhere all the time and having that rushed feeling. For me life will flow...

 

[FIYes]

When does ER get hard? I don't know because it hasn't gotten hard yet for me...going on four years. I have gone through some hard events since ER...my mother's illness and death, but ER was a blessing. I would never have been able to spend the time with her that I spent in her final months had I still been working.

 

[LitGal]

Hasn't happened yet. Have been ER'd for 13 mo., and just wish I could have done this 5 yrs. earlier. Yes, every day feels like Saturday.

 

[David1961]

Been ERd for a little less than a year. So far, the first month was the hardest. I treated it like a long vacation instead of retirement. Each month, it's been a little better than the previous month.

 

[brewer12345]

Why not schedule a few big personal projects or some travel sprinkled across the first few months of your big blank spot. Fill it in a little, don't go crazy.

In my case, I scheduled a 2 month Europe backpacking trip and a holiday with family. I also scheduled a few nights out with old friends. It gave me something to look forward to and plan for.

Yeah, we have a 3 to 4 week cross country trip in mind for next July to visit my family and so that I can hopefully relive some of my childhood memories (blueberry picking, catching catfish after dark in the pond, pickerel fishing in Pine Barrens lakes, tubing on Cedar Creek, crabbing in Barnegat Bay, etc.). I also plan to basically camp out in deer season and not come back until I have a load of venison, rather than sneak a day here, a day there. But other than that stuff, I cannot see the day to day yet. Guess I will figure it out when I get there.

 

[Moscyn]

Have ER for around 3 years. Don't find anything hard at all in ER. Sure, there are some slow days but there are many more interesting days. I use those slow days to count the many blessings of ER. I don't really keep a list of things to do anymore because there's so many things I still want to learn. Oh, I just started piano classes last week!

 

[Alan]

Well into our 4th year of ER and have found nothing hard about it so far. We remember talking 6 months after the last of our children left home and decided that the continued feeling of freedom was wonderful and nothing to feel guilty about. Same thing with ER, at first we expected the novelty to wear off but instead it just seems to get better and better.

 

[Gotadimple]

When?

The OP asks as if 'hard' is inevitable.

No, it's not! If you are comfortable with your decision to retire early and you have developed interests and curiosity it should never get hard.

Personally, I continue to perfect my goofing off technique. I think it will be many more years before I have it down pat.

-- Rita

 

[Major Tom]

This may be unique to me, but man, during the past 3 years of ER, my "work ethic" skills have deteriorated badly. Now, don't get me wrong, I love retirement, but I am amazed out how much less I get done in a day, than what I could accomplish when I was working. Just yesterday, I had a few minor chores to do yesterday that took about an hour and had to do a mad scramble to accomplish the tasks before sundown. The day before, I played a round of golf with a friend. He wanted to meet at 9 at the course. I told him I wouldn't go unless he waited until 10 because I don't like to rush. I imagine it will just get worse. 10 years ago, I would have teed it up a 7 a.m.

What's that saying - "If you want to get something done, ask a busy person"?

I have experienced the exact same thing as you Mulligan. I am less productive now than when working, yet just as content. Luckily, it doesn't bother me in the slightest. It doesn't sound as if you are at all perturbed either!

 

[rbmrtn]

And here I thought the hard part of ER was getting there...

Seems if it that hard you can always go back to w*rk (NOT ME! )

 

[Andre1969]

Before I retired, I was a little scared. After all, I wasn't "retiring TO something" and I hadn't read any of the scads of books about the psychological adjustment to retirement.

Like Brewer12345, this is the part that has me a bit scared, as well. Up until this past week at work, my plan was to retire anywhere between 2016 and 2020, (age 46 to 50), depending on the economy, my own financial situation, how well-balanced the BS buckets are, etc. Well, last week, let's just say the kitty litter hit the fan.

I got so fed up that I almost turned in my badges and walked out. Several times. Ended up taking off Friday to cool off. It didn't work. I'm supposed to meet with my immediate supervisor, who's as useless as teets on a boar, and another manager who feels my pain and is rooting for me. But right now I'm so fed up that I'm thinking of taking Monday off as well. I don't even want to look at that building, let alone go in it. So I might just tell them let's meet for lunch nearby, or something.

So in my case, obviously, I'm running away from something, rather than to something. Firecalc says I have about a 95% chance of making it. I'm scared of the potential change, but at the same time, giddy about the possibilities.

This is probably an obscure reference, but I feel kinda like Burgess Meredith in that Twilight Zone episode, just before he broke his glasses. There's "Time Enough At Last!!"

 

[haha]

This may be unique to me, but man, during the past 3 years of ER, my "work ethic" skills have deteriorated badly. Now, don't get me wrong, I love retirement, but I am amazed out how much less I get done in a day, than what I could accomplish when I was working. Just yesterday, I had a few minor chores to do yesterday that took about an hour and had to do a mad scramble to accomplish the tasks before sundown. The day before, I played a round of golf with a friend. He wanted to meet at 9 at the course. I told him I wouldn't go unless he waited until 10 because I don't like to rush. I imagine it will just get worse. 10 years ago, I would have teed it up a 7 a.m.

This sounds very familiar to me. I am long retired while my GF works. I can't see that either of us is more happy; we just have different challenges and rewards.

But one thing for sure, she can finish in 4 hours what I will still be getting ready to start!

Ha

 

[W2R]

Like Brewer12345, this is the part that has me a bit scared, as well. Up until this past week at work, my plan was to retire anywhere between 2016 and 2020, (age 46 to 50), depending on the economy, my own financial situation, how well-balanced the BS buckets are, etc. Well, last week, let's just say the kitty litter hit the fan.

I got so fed up that I almost turned in my badges and walked out. Several times. Ended up taking off Friday to cool off. It didn't work. I'm supposed to meet with my immediate supervisor, who's as useless as teets on a boar, and another manager who feels my pain and is rooting for me. But right now I'm so fed up that I'm thinking of taking Monday off as well. I don't even want to look at that building, let alone go in it. So I might just tell them let's meet for lunch nearby, or something.

So in my case, obviously, I'm running away from something, rather than to something. Firecalc says I have about a 95% chance of making it. I'm scared of the potential change, but at the same time, giddy about the possibilities.

This is probably an obscure reference, but I feel kinda like Burgess Meredith in that Twilight Zone episode, just before he broke his glasses. There's "Time Enough At Last!!"

TAKE MONDAY OFF!!! If/when you retire, I would strongly suggest doing it on your own terms with you at the helm, and not simply as a knee-jerk reaction to the immediate work situation. Don't let them take control and push you out at their convenience. If you feel like it, make the decision now but do it calmly and rationally, and don't act on it this week. At least, that is my advice.

 

[rbmrtn]

This is probably an obscure reference, but I feel kinda like Burgess Meredith in that Twilight Zone episode, just before he broke his glasses. There's "Time Enough At Last!!"

Not at all, one my favorite episodes. Watched it again when SciFi channel had the july 4th marathon.

 

[imoldernu]

Experience:
6 years as a kid
17 years as a student
30 years as a family provider
24 years of total freedom

IMHO, contentment is a matter of attitude, imagination, curiosity and acceptance. Each day offers a new opportunity to learn, to do, to experience and to enjoy... all at a pace that is dictated by one's self. Therein lies the difference.

Some day, look up the definition of retirement, and you'll find the concept (as we know it today), didn't even exist 150 years ago.

A happy retirement comes from striking the balance between means and needs.

 

[ChainsBeGone]

Only 2 months into ER now, but have yet to wake up missing work. In fact, the days go by so fast that I've found little time to check in here and read. I can't believe how fast the days pass. I've found that I can only get one "big" thing accomplished in a given day. By the time I've read the paper (e-edition) in bed, along with the morning coffee, and gone to the gym/worked out, the day is half over before it's really begun, and I'm usually awake and heading to the coffee pot around 6 a.m. I read so many times here the posts that state "I can't believe how I ever found time to work" and that is exactly how it is for me so far, at least these first two months into ER.

 

[Mulligan]

This sounds very familiar to me. I am long retired while my GF works. I can't see that either of us is more happy; we just have different challenges and rewards.

But one thing for sure, she can finish in 4 hours what I will still be getting ready to start!

Ha

I find being in a committed relationship, living separate, while the GF works and I do not as the perfect relationship scenario!

 

[scrabbler1]

I find being in a committed relationship, living separate, while the GF works and I do not as the perfect relationship scenario!

This has been my scenario for the last 4 1/2 years since I ERed. She works FT but I do not, and we live separately although we live walking distance from each other. Before I ERed, she lived nearby, sometimes walking distance, sometimes a few miles away, while I worked PT. Being ERed enables me to help her out with everyday things more which is good.

 

[David1961]

Thinking about this some more (and maybe over-analyzing a little), the focus for me is not that ER is not hard. Life is hard at times, so since ER is a part of life it can be hard also. For me, the point is that ER is much more REWARDING but not necessarily less hard.

 

[David1961]

I find being in a committed relationship, living separate, while the GF works and I do not as the perfect relationship scenario!

I would agree!

 

[Mulligan]

I would agree!

Like Scrabbler said, it allows you to get some brownie points by helping them out and yet still have all the necessary time to do what you want to do. Then with their free time at a premium, you can let the lady dictate what the "quality time" is supposed to be, knowing full well you can survive it because you have all day tomorrow to do whatever.

 

[David1961]

Yes, since you have plenty of "alone time/quality time" for yourself it gives you more time and energy to accommodate her needs. Wonder if there are any dating sites that match up w*rking ladies with ER'd men?