Why are some vices more acceptable?

[Chuckanut]

Quote:

Originally Posted by haha I know a fair amount about women and shoes, (taken together; nobody can be said to know a much about women in their entirety). I sold shoes in a specialty shoe store, and I have heard women refer to their "eff-me" shoes.

When I became single again, I made a point of being well groomed, and had shirts and pants that looked good together on me. However, a female friend informed me one day that my shoes were torpedoing the whole look. Women take shoes VERY seriously. So, I bought several pairs of new shoes and I keep them polished and in good shape.

For a man to get between a woman and her shoes is almost as stupid as answering the question "Dear, do these jeans make me look fat?"

[Blue Collar Guy]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Fedup I used to have a cheap mirror. It did the same thing to my confidence. I felt tall and slim. Cheap mirror would do it for me.

You and that special mirror again!

[mamadogmamacat]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Koogie If she has been divorced three times, she has probably wasted a lot more money doing that than spending $800 on shoes. I applaud them both. Someone has to keep the economy running. It certainly won't be tightwads like me...

+1 thoroughly enjoying this discussion. lots of good posts. Think this may be the best one.

[Blue Collar Guy]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Chuckanut When I became single again, I made a point of being well groomed, and had shirts and pants that looked good together on me. However, a female friend informed me one day that my shoes were torpedoing the whole look. Women take shoes VERY seriously. So, I bought several pairs of new shoes and I keep them polished and in good shape. For a man to get between a woman and her shoes is almost as stupid as answering the question "Dear, do these jeans make me look fat?"

hahahahahaha

[Chuckanut]

Quote:

Originally Posted by GalaxyBoy Wait, theater tickets can cost 2500 bucks?

Reminds me of the "Bubble' skit on SNL a few months ago.

[Blue Collar Guy]

Seems my mind is else where, when i saw the title Vices, somehow fancy shoes and theatre tickets werent my first thought. Splurge maybe, not vice, hahahah

[Souschef]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Ronstar I've spent a lot of money on what other people consider to be stupid things. So I made it a point a long time ago to not judge people's spending habits. Let them spend whatever $ on whatever makes them happy.

+100
I recently spent $2100 to fly a MiG15. I am 79 and only go around once,
Why not, if you can afford it?

[Amethyst]

Shoes? This thread says "Vice" but it's about shoes?

I kept looking for "Why is being a drunk somehow more OK than being a drug addict" or "why are people more judgmental of overeaters/fat people, than of people who sleep with anybody who'll hold still" but no.

Shoes.

Sigh...

[flyingaway]

Maybe that kind of spending habit contributed a lot to the three divorces.

[joeea]

Quote:

Originally Posted by bclover Why were the shoes a no-no but the theater tickets ok. I see that here a lot too, travel is ok to spend on but say a new camera is not?

We all get to decide which extravagances are "acceptable" and which are not.

In recent years it seems to be "a thing" to value "experiences over things" for many. I think it depends on the experience and on the thing, but whatever.

As long as you have the money, and nobody else is depending on you for financial support, you can spend any or all of your money on whatever makes you happy - shoes, tickets, travel, cameras of whatever. In many of those cases I won't understand it (particularly the shoes), but I'm not the one who is spending their own hard-earned money.

As far as I'm concerned, acceptability is in the eye of the beholder.

[Aerides]

They say that women don't do our hair, makeup, clothing, etc., so much to appeal to men as to compete with other women. There's a difference, and there is some truth to it. A man I don't know flatters my shoes or bag or something I'd think it was odd. A woman says "nice shoes!" and I feel good all day.

The woman that took offense to spending on shoes (i mean what who does that out loud? friends or not it is SHOES THERE IS NO TOO MUCH IF YOU LOVE THEM. caps for emphasis)... sounds like maybe there is some judgy-extra-competitive thingy going on with those two?

I don't know any of you, but I do know that multi-decade female friendships are usually quite complex. It's not about the shoes. It might be about rank.

[aja8888]

I'm surprised she was only going to buy one pair of shoes. When EX-DW and I were going thru this, she was buying 10 of everything in the clothing store and my attorney was frantically trying to shut the credit cards off (to no avail).

[UnrealizedPotential]

It all comes down to personal priorities. He who pays the piper calls the tune. Of course some need hand holding what those priorities should be and there are plenty who will be happy to tell you what you should do, provided you pay them of course.

[Fedup]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blue Collar Guy You and that special mirror again!

Haha, I didn't think anything wrong with that cheap mirror until I came home to my mom's house. What happened to the tall and slim Fedup?

[Teacher Terry]

I am a woman and I have always hated shoes.

[Bestwifeever]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mdlerth If the pending divorcee burns cash on footwear before the actual split, does it no longer count as a marital asset subject to judicial arbitration?

She might end up with only one Jimmy Choo? Oh no! Maybe the couple will stay together for the sake of the shoes!

Those shoes actually often hold their value so maybe she is the smarter one after all.

It sounds like a fun dinner with very good friends, actually.

[ls99]

Shoes, fascinating subject.

As a newbie dance class student, I showed up at the first class in my nearly ten year old Ballys. Every woman in the class instantly recognized them and commented. Seems some women pay very close attention to the man's shoes. No they do not make me a better student of the Tango, or of the Waltz.

As for the women's dance shoes, they seem carefully selected for the occasion. They have different pairs for various dances. In time I'll learn the differences.

So long as a woman spends her own money, it really is (was) no concern to me on what she spends it on. It was true with late DW.

[Danmar]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shanky My point of view: if you are spending lots of $$$ on booze & hookers, but you LBYM and you are saving enough to continue that lifestyle in retirement (including medical), you are still being financially repsonsible. But... If you are spending what little you have on helping orphans and baby animals, but going further into debt to do that, you are being financially irresponsible. "Morality" has no place in this discussion.

A somewhat exaggerated example to illustrate a very valid point. Everybody will spend their resources in ways that suit them. Who are we to judge?

[bclover]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aerides They say that women don't do our hair, makeup, clothing, etc., so much to appeal to men as to compete with other women. There's a difference, and there is some truth to it. A man I don't know flatters my shoes or bag or something I'd think it was odd. A woman says "nice shoes!" and I feel good all day. The woman that took offense to spending on shoes (i mean what who does that out loud? friends or not it is SHOES THERE IS NO TOO MUCH IF YOU LOVE THEM. caps for emphasis)... sounds like maybe there is some judgy-extra-competitive thingy going on with those two? I don't know any of you, but I do know that multi-decade female friendships are usually quite complex. It's not about the shoes. It might be about rank.

Some one else mentioned that to me, not so much about rank but more of the fact that three of us have/had (I'm widowed) happy 30 year plus marriages and she has not. Someone said to me that it might be a way of her saying "I can still do some thing"... either way, we love her fancy shoes and all.....

I definitely agree with your first paragraph, lol. I've worn eyeglasses my entire life so I tend to spend a bit more for designer frames, I always say it's the one thing that I have to have every day of my life. anyhow a guy says that they like the frames, I say "thank you" and dismiss it. A girl tells me those are sharp frames and I'm like "YES!! SCORE!!"

lol go figure.

[GravitySucks]

I was hoping this would be a much more interesting thread than shoes and theater.[emoji57]