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You know you're retired when...
08-05-2009, 05:29 PM
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#1
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Recycles dryer sheets
Join Date: May 2006
Posts: 120
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You know you're retired when...
You call your Life's Good t-shirt a dress shirt.
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08-05-2009, 05:59 PM
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#2
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Gone but not forgotten
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Sarasota,fl.
Posts: 11,447
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You are able to read the whole series of Stephanie Plum books in two weeks .
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08-05-2009, 07:06 PM
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#3
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Full time employment: Posting here.
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 513
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You go to Walmart for exercise
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08-05-2009, 08:56 PM
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#4
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Collin County, TX
Posts: 9,296
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You have a beer with your lunch and chortle at all the other diners that must refrain because they have to go back to work.
__________________
There's no need to complicate, our time is short..
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08-06-2009, 06:03 AM
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#5
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Feb 2006
Location: Washington, DC
Posts: 11,331
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 Quote:
Originally Posted by RASAP
You call your Life's Good t-shirt a dress shirt.
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Nah, my dress T has abstract graphics and a higher thread count.
__________________
Idleness is fatal only to the mediocre -- Albert Camus
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08-06-2009, 06:10 AM
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#6
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gone traveling
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Eastern PA
Posts: 3,851
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You no longer wear a watch nor remember what day of the week it is  ...
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08-06-2009, 06:19 AM
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#7
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Moderator
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Eastern WV Panhandle
Posts: 25,346
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It's a strain to remember that if the newspaper comics are in color that means it's Sunday and you can't buy wine until after 1:00 PM.
__________________
When I was a kid I wanted to be older. This is not what I expected.
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08-06-2009, 08:00 AM
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#8
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Full time employment: Posting here.
Join Date: Oct 2007
Posts: 798
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You decide not to do anything today and then tomorrow you pick up where you left off.
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08-06-2009, 10:42 AM
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#9
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Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Jun 2007
Location: At The Cafe
Posts: 6,873
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You’re at your home computer doing your own thing while glancing out the window to see your old fellow commuters hop on the bus. You have oatmeal at (what time is it?) 9:42 a.m. But wait, that’s what I did at work but started an hour later; it wasn’t my own ‘puter and was constantly interrupted by someone else’s idea of work. I get a kick out of paying myself a regular salary, now that’s something new. SO and I are headed out later today to try a new Afghani restaurant and see a play which is two for one on Thursday nights; I actually did that sometimes during the workweek but stopped when I was about 45; SO worked too late to go out on weeknights; definitely retired.
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08-13-2009, 12:07 PM
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#10
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Full time employment: Posting here.
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Ottawa and Fort Myers
Posts: 778
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bbbamI
You have a beer with your lunch and chortle at all the other diners that must refrain because they have to go back to work.
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I must be doing it wrong then...I have beer with lunch BECAUSE I have to go back to work ; - )
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08-13-2009, 12:38 PM
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#11
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Collin County, TX
Posts: 9,296
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kroeran
I must be doing it wrong then...I have beer with lunch BECAUSE I have to go back to work ; - )
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It's fun either way.... 
__________________
There's no need to complicate, our time is short..
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08-13-2009, 01:57 PM
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#12
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 6,506
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No longer being in "essential" and "safety sensitive" position holder is truly a pleasure. No more random drug and alcohol tests with some dude you don't know watching you pee in a cup. Never had the luck of female observers. 
Not having to show up at train/car/truck demolition derbies, trains always won. Watching mangled body parts extricated from under the trains.
No dealing with irate passengers and senior managers on a hot summer afternoon when sagged catenary tears of power collecting pantograph in the middle of a bridge. Stranding 600 or so passengers trying to get to the stadium.
Never again having to show up at w*rk in the worst da*n floods/ice/snowstorms. True pleasure in the winter just watching the snow plows go by and getting a refill for the coffee mug.
Best of all not having to deal with union shop rules. You can't appreciate that until you had to deal with it. The freedom from that is like having died and arrived in heaven.
__________________
There must be moderation in everything, including moderation.
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08-13-2009, 02:06 PM
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#13
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Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: Oahu
Posts: 26,860
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Quote:
Originally Posted by RASAP
You know you're retired when...
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... your teenager has more W-2 income than you and your spouse combined...
__________________
*
Co-author (with my daughter) of “Raising Your Money-Savvy Family For Next Generation Financial Independence.”
Author of the book written on E-R.org: "The Military Guide to Financial Independence and Retirement."
I don't spend much time here— please send a PM.
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08-13-2009, 04:58 PM
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#14
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: South Texas~29N/98W Just West of Woman Hollering Creek
Posts: 6,674
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You know you're retired when... you have time to actually quiz a telemarketer during the day about he got your very secret telephone number that you only gave to Warren Buffet and Heidi Fleiss.
__________________
Part-Owner of Texas
Outside of a dog, a book is man's best friend. Inside of a dog, it's too dark to read. Groucho Marx
In dire need of: faster horses, younger woman, older whiskey, more money.
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08-13-2009, 05:02 PM
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#15
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Rio Grande Valley
Posts: 38,145
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You get depressed on Fridays because the campground is going to fill up, and you're really happy on Sundays, because so many folks are leaving!
Audrey
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08-13-2009, 06:04 PM
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#16
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: East Nowhere, 43N Latitude, NY
Posts: 9,037
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You run into former co_w*rkers (still there) of the same age and realize how much younger you look... 
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"All our dreams can come true, if we have the courage to pursue them." - Walt Disney
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08-14-2009, 06:03 AM
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#17
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Dryer sheet wannabe
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: Litchfield County
Posts: 16
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You can read the entire "what did you do today?" thread.
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08-14-2009, 09:56 AM
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#18
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Give me a museum and I'll fill it. (Picasso)
Give me a forum ...
Join Date: May 2008
Posts: 6,506
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Yuo KNOW you're retired:
When the following conversation takes place, like with DW and I this morning:
DW: it is Friday, right?
Me: I think so, I did get the town paper yesterday, it usually is published Thursdays.
DW: you sure?
Me: yeah, I got it in the diner after breakfast, and I only go for breakfast after working out at the Y on Tuesdays and Thursdays.
DW: Ok then, it must be Friday. I go swimming on Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays.
Me: well then go swimming.
DW: what time is it?
Me: hold on I need to find my glasses, can't see the clock without them.
DW: I think you left them on the counter.
Me: Yeah that's where I usually leave them
And so on for a while.
So is it really Friday?
Just kidding, have wall clock tied to WWVB National Bureau of Standards, (now I think called NIST, whatever it stands for) radio station, transmitting precise time and date information 24/7. When all else fails, I look at that to find out what day it is. It spells out the day, fortunately.
Now where did the morning go?
__________________
There must be moderation in everything, including moderation.
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08-14-2009, 10:07 AM
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#19
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Moderator Emeritus
Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 17,774
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You only have one deadline you care about, the one the "Boss" above set a long time ago for you.
__________________
“Would you like an adventure now, or would you like to have your tea first?” J.M. Barrie, Peter Pan
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08-14-2009, 02:04 PM
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#20
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Thinks s/he gets paid by the post
Join Date: Oct 2006
Location: North-Central Illinois
Posts: 3,228
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You know you're retired when....
Someone asks you what time it is, and you respond, "Well, it's light out...must be daytime."
'Cause I rarely know what time it is...and I care even less!!! 
And I NEVER no what day it is....'cept on Wednesday. When I look outside and see the neighbor's trash cans by the curb, I then realize I better hustle to do the same...because Wednesday is garbage day!!! 
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