Help! I hate my job

[cute fuzzy bunny]

Dont try this at home, I *am* a professional.

[yAyA]

I hate my job too. I just got a call about a interview for a job I really want, so I'm so excited. I won't be arrogant until I actually get the job, so I will still smile at work like I really want to be there

[sgeeeee]

Quote:

Originally Posted by yAyA I hate my job too. I just got a call about a interview for a job I really want, so I'm so excited. I won't be arrogant until I actually get the job, so I will still smile at work like I really want to be there

Good luck YaYa. Keep smiling.

[mickj]

My update...

I would say I have lived through depression at this job all this time...
I have looked into several other career/job options and I can't see anything that provides the money I need and/or some expectation that it would be more satisfying than what I am currently doing.

Even more depressing for me is the inability to get out of debt, I am stuck at the same debt level... not really going up but not down either. Retirement accounts are growing but that isn't much consolation when I realize I have 20+ years left of work.

Any ideas

[Milton]

Quote:

Originally Posted by mickj I have almost doubled my salary since I started working 6 1/2 years ago but I hate my job. I find my self constantly looking at other jobs that I might enjoy more but none of them would match my current salary. I am trying to balance my desire to FIRE with having a job that I would really enjoy. It just doesn't seem worth it to have a job that hate when I have so many more years of work ahead of me before I can consider FIRE.

Get out now.

I appreciate that the grass is always greener. It is quite possible that you will not find greater satisfaction in any of the other, lower paying jobs.

However, since you've only been working a few years, the risk of grinding away at something you hate is much greater than the alternative. Not only is it likely that you will burn out (or be let go) long before you reach FIRE, but the longer you stay in your current job, the older you'll get and the less marketable you will be for other occupations. Your sense of being trapped will increase exponentially.

If you were five or fewer years away from FIRE, my advice would be different.

[W2R]

Quote:

Originally Posted by mickj My update... I would say I have lived through depression at this job all this time... I have looked into several other career/job options and I can't see anything that provides the money I need and/or some expectation that it would be more satisfying than what I am currently doing. Even more depressing for me is the inability to get out of debt, I am stuck at the same debt level... not really going up but not down either. Retirement accounts are growing but that isn't much consolation when I realize I have 20+ years left of work. Any ideas

Yes, but you aren't going to like it. This is how I got out of debt.

After paying to your retirement accounts, you have a certain amount of money left as take-home pay each month.

Take that sum, and divide it into three equal piles. One pile goes towards housing, one pile goes towards all other living expenses, and one pile goes towards your future.

And don't tell me you can't live on less - - you can. Get more roommates, and get your clothes at goodwill. If you truly feel that you cannot live on less (translation: you just don't want to live on less), then you need to moonlight so make your choice. No further debt is allowed and you have to live on these amounts and not one cent more.

Now, you can use the pile that goes towards your future, to pay off your debt while you create no further debt.

Once you have paid off your debt, you will have a lot more available and you can start investing and so on.

[Milton]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Want2retire And don't tell me you can't live on less - - you can. Get more roommates, and get your clothes at goodwill. If you truly feel that you cannot live on less (translation: you just don't want to live on less), then you need to moonlight so make your choice.

I second the above.

I'm sure you can live on less, since your original post said: "I have almost doubled my salary since I started working 6 1/2 years ago". Obviously your basic living expenses didn't double during that time period, so you must have things that you can cut back on, if you're serious about wanting to eliminate your debtload.

Of course, if you just want to complain, no changes are necessary. The ball's in your court.

[CuppaJoe]

Continue the soul searching: What would you do if you suddenly found yourself out of work due to a downsizing? Have you looked into treating the depression? I could get thrown off the board for saying this: Can you borrow from the retirement account? Good luck and keep us posted.

Your situation reminds me of myself when I wanted to work in international banking--I found I could make more money 3/4 time elsewhere, which is what I did for 20 years and then found a job I really wanted.

[packrat44]

Debt is volunteer slavery. Get out now even though it might/will involve some short term suffering. Stay out of debt at all costs after you arrive. Being out of debt is the best feeling there is and allows you the freedom to choose your own path for the future.

[ziggy29]

As others have mentioned -- debt will keep you imprisoned with a job you hate.

For me, the Quest for FIRE isn't specifically about not working any more...it's about the ability to leave a soul-sucking j*b on MY terms. It's about the ability to take a pay cut to do something you'd much rather be doing.

Debt puts a floor on how much of a cut in pay you can take -- thus, you have to stay with the "highest bidder" to stay afloat...meaning a job you hate. A few years ago, my employers had golden handcuffs on me. Since then, we've simplified, downsized to a small house with low taxes and utilities and no mortgage. We have no debt (other than what we spend on the CCs paid in full each month).

As a result, I could lose my job tomorrow and take a new one at 1/3 the pay...and we'd make it. The j*b isn't so horrible that I won't keep feeding the FIRE kitty in the meantime. But if it happens...we're ready. We've downsized and simplified and eliminated all our debts. As mentioned above, it's a very liberating feeling to know that you won't have creditors hounding you at every step if you lose your job or take a pay cut to pursue something preferable.

If you have $1000 a month in debts, that's an extra $1000 in after tax income you MUST have to get by (probably close to $20,000 a year). Eliminating those debts will allow you to do something else in your life without NEEDING that extra $1000 in a job that makes you miserable. Getting out of debt is NOT easy, but very much worth the struggle.

[mickj]

Not that is is teaching us any lesson... but my father-in-law passed away recently. Since we have been able to mantain our debt level for several years and at least not get into more debt, we are hoping that what is left from his estate will almost completely pay off our debt (except for the house.)

To the posters who state that I could live on less if I really wanted to, of course it is true. We all make choices. I have made mine and I accept full responsibility. Thanks for everyone who posted. It is nice to have comments good/bad and indifferent.

I have sought some help with the depression, I don't know if I didn't stick with it long enough or what but at the time it seemed to make things worse :-(

I believe that 90% of my depression comes from the boredom at work, when you do something you don't think is valuable it is hard to feel much self worth.

I think I have always struggled with depression, or at least from early adolescence. I hope that I can find a way out. It isn't easy but I do agree, it is worth it.

Thanks again

[lucija]

Sorry to hear about your father-in-law.

Quote:

Originally Posted by mickj ... <snip> I believe that 90% of my depression comes from the boredom at work, when you do something you don't think is valuable it is hard to feel much self worth...<snip>

I have no idea what type of work you do, but do you have an option for some type of less radical change - something like a lateral move? How about different project (same job function) or different job function within the same dept/company? It may be easier to move within the dept/company than going through a full-blown job change, but may result in somewhat "fresh" workload/less boredom.

[W2R]

Quote:

Originally Posted by mickj I believe that 90% of my depression comes from the boredom at work, when you do something you don't think is valuable it is hard to feel much self worth.

I think that the key for some of us is to base our self worth on something other than our job.

I can't imagine thinking I was a worthless person just because of being bored at work. I don't have, and have never had, that luxury. Life just never seems to entertain me in the manner that I might like.

[Coach]

Quote:

Originally Posted by mickj It just doesn't seem worth it to have a job that hate when I have so many more years of work ahead of me before I can consider FIRE.

Mickj, I think you are correct.

Coach

[lazygood4nothinbum]

Quote:

Originally Posted by mickj I can't see...that it would be more satisfying than what I am currently doing.

reading this thread makes me think debt is only part of the cause of the op's misery. the other parts, outside of the self-diagnosed inherent depression, might include the job but, i suspect, also fire itself.

i stayed out of debt throughout my working life but also i had never considered fire until six months before i quit. if you always live below your means, which i did--not because that is what i thought i was doing; i simply always thought that saving money was a part of living within my means--then you would naturally be working towards fire, whether it happens to happen or not.

but fire considerations cut both ways. i've read impressive posts by many here who kept fire in mind throughout their careers and it helped them stay on track to that goal. but for someone like me who is not all that goal-oriented, had i considered fire earlier on, i would have just spent my life being teased and possibly frustrated when the tease no longer turned me on.

what is a goal to some is an obstacle to others. fire can be a hurdle or it can become a firewall.

[myself]

Quote:

Originally Posted by mickj My update... I would say I have lived through depression at this job all this time... I have looked into several other career/job options and I can't see anything that provides the money I need and/or some expectation that it would be more satisfying than what I am currently doing. Even more depressing for me is the inability to get out of debt, I am stuck at the same debt level... not really going up but not down either. Retirement accounts are growing but that isn't much consolation when I realize I have 20+ years left of work. Any ideas

If debt is basically stagnant (not going up/down), then one has to get rid of services that one can get rid of debt.
For example, is it really necessary to have cable, if it's costing you $1-$2/day, if you could buy an antenna that can receive TV signals through the air?
Or, if you have a cell phone AND a landline, couldn't you easily get rid of one of them (we're seriously thinking about getting rid of the landline).
Cutting back on going out, or groceries can usually (but not always) be done.

[Rambler]

I agree with most of the other posters about your debt situation. Only you (and spouse) can deal with something like that, but it takes a decision, and then execution. If you have not executed, then you have not truly decided. A wise onld man once told me, decide what your decision is going to be before you have to make it. For example, if you don't want your credit card balance to go up, decide not to use the credit card when you are shopping. Check your wallet, and if there is no cash, make sure you have already decided you can't have the targeted item because you have decided not to use the card. It works...see W2R's post...she just decided, and that was half or more of the battle.

On the "hate your job" front, I would say that if you can't reduce your debt where you are, and can't make more elsewhere, STAY PUT until you learn to control debt better. BUT, you MUST figure out a way to deal with your work. I suggest figuring out what you like about it, and what you don't like about it. Tune out the things you don't like and focus on those you do.

I kind of suspect that there are some deeper issues. For example, maybe you don't REALLY know what you want. For example, you want FIRE, but you want the toys and evenings out as well. If reality says you can't have both, which have you chosen? I also kind of feel that perhaps there is an issue of not seeing eye-to-eye with spouse about a few things, FIRE and debt being a couple of them. Not my business to pry, but I suspect.

Suggestion: kwitcherbellyachin', sit down and figure a few things out (what you really want as a couple/family, options on how you might get there, etc), make some decisions, make a plan, then execute. Plan the work, then work the plan. Sure a few bumps will come in the road, and you might fall off the "no debt" wagon a time or two over the next 10-20 years. When you do, just pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and get back on the wagon.

R

[bright eyed]

If you hate your job because of conditions that are endemic to your field then you need to consider a new career. If it's just your particular office change offices or companies!

I have recently had a few friends at work have very serious personal or family problems, compounding the misery they already felt from unhappiness with their job... I was similarly going thru a lot... What I discovered was that the only thing you CAN control is your job... You can't get rid of a family illness or pesky in laws... You can choose your job situation....

[mickj]

I was seriously looking into starting another career before my father-in-law passed away. I think I do focus on my job as something I could change because there are other things in my life that cause a lot of stress and anxiety but I don't have a lot of control over. I realized that changing careers would probably be a bad thing.. lower pay, possiblity I would like it even less, and increased personal stress... I don't deal with change very well. So I know I need to suck it up and make the best of it but I have been saying that for years now.

We have made plans in the past to really stick to a budget but for whatever reason it hasn't worked. Just like focusing on FIRE too much can make you unhappy.. focusing too much on getting out of debt, when it will be years away, can really drag me down.

Man, I feel like such a whiner.

[chinaco]

Do not just take a wild leap. You could wind up worse off. Remember changing jobs is stressful until you get established. Try to determine if your dissatisfaction is with the career or the company? Take stock in your skills and identify your wants in a job. Then consider your options.

If you think you have a skill gap, then consider going to night school to fill the gap. If you are bored, that will solve that problem. It might help you to broaden your horizons also.

I know that is basic advice and doesn't help you solve your immediate problem... but you are not trapped. Just keep your expectations real.

Good luck.