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Old 08-11-2016, 06:37 AM   #21
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Sometimes (guilty as well!) people don't really listen, they just respond to trigger words and give you their world view based on their context and common sense. No desire to understand you is there. I think that's what happened there.

Listening to understand is quite rare. It's one reason why good consultants make a good living for doing so little actual work: They listen to understand what other people want.
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Old 08-11-2016, 10:26 AM   #22
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One of the things I learned early in life is that what other people think of me is none of my business! It works great.

It started with rumours that I must have a rich wife because of how I lived. I would just smile and stay quiet. If I opened my mouth, they would learn something that I choose not to share.
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Old 08-11-2016, 11:48 AM   #23
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Two coworkers asked me where I plan to work after leaving the military. When I said I didn't plan to work after leaving the military, they went into lectures about the problems with my plan. One was going on about the need to work to keep yourself busy while the other was going on about how I can't financially retire on a military pension. Neither one asked more about my plan or would listen to me countering their arguments. Just a total shutdown of the concept of FIRE.

Ugh. Had to come here to even say anything because if I dare mention early retirement to friends or family I'm immediately inundated with 1073 reasons why I am "luckier" than they are and how there is no way any of them could ever retire early.

/rant
I heard this 22 years ago, when I retired from the Navy. In general, people just don't like someone in their 40's not working. In my case, it's even worse in a small blue collar town, than in an upscale urban area where people don't pay much attention to how people derive income. The worst was a neighbor who implied that I was held to a higher standard of lawn care, because I didn't work.

I'm 63 now, and since about age 55, most of the attitudes have waned. I'm just an old retired guy now.
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Old 08-11-2016, 11:53 AM   #24
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I think it was Facebook's Sheryl Sandberg who talked about the 20-40-60 rule, and why you shouldn't let the opinions of others hold you back from making bold plans (I'm paraphrasing, but this was the gist of it). At 20, you worry about what other people are thinking of you, at 40, you discover it doesn't matter what they think of you, and at 60 you realize they weren't thinking about you at all (they were too busy thinking of their own lives).
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Old 08-13-2016, 12:43 PM   #25
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Ugh. Had to come here to even say anything because if I dare mention early retirement to friends or family I'm immediately inundated with 1073 reasons why I am "luckier" than they are and how there is no way any of them could ever retire early.

/rant
I think you just separated your co-workers from your real friends.

"I'm going to take a few months off with family & friends before I start the career search..."
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Old 08-15-2016, 04:17 PM   #26
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Oh...one more thing. Under no..I mean NO circumstances should you elect the Redux @ 15 years. It's a terrible, terrible plan and I have NEVER met anyone who didn't regret it. So...NO!!!
NEVER!! It's a suckers game!

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Sometimes it is easiest to just give up and allow people to keep believing whatever it is that they want to believe. It isn't going to make your retirement any less real.
Very true
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Old 08-16-2016, 04:02 PM   #27
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My MIL freaked out a little at me going part time. In her view these are the years where we save for retirement. We finally let her know a little about our net worth and that got her off our back. She isn't very financially literate, and is one of those incredibly lucky ones with an awesome pension (Probation Officer for the county sheriff) that allowed her to retire at 56 this year.

....she's hoping we hang out more.
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Old 08-16-2016, 04:37 PM   #28
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The way I look it is that if you've retired from the military, you've earned the right to do whatever it is you want to do. You've downright sacrificed for your career and your country.

And for those that have earned enough and/or saved enough to retire early, more power to you. Go enjoy life.

My father prepared for many years for his early retirement. I was fortunately able to retire at one year of age younger than he--with substantially more retirement funds. I've worked hard at learning not to work so hard and long, and I had a great teacher.

And I'm proud for anyone that can do the same.
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Old 08-19-2016, 03:37 PM   #29
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I don't get too much crap from my co-workers, and I never indicate that I plan to do just 20 years. As others have said, it can be a career killer if you say it to the wrong person. I do, however, usually get an earful from my boss when the subject of retirement comes up. My boss is at 22 years and "ready" to punch out. I'm just coming up on 13 years. He's constantly talking about getting a civilian job and writing his resume. I have no plans to do any of that, and when I mention that I have no intentions of working when I retire, he says the same things, "you'll get bored," "you'll want a job." WRONG! FIRE has been my dream since before I even knew FIRE was a thing. All I knew was that when I retire from the military, I never want to work again.

I don't let any of it bother me though. It doesn't upset me when anyone makes it clear that they doubt my plans. It just motivates me even more to prove them wrong. I'm looking forward to being part of the class of 2023!
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Old 08-19-2016, 05:31 PM   #30
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I just want to be clear because several people have brought it up:

I've never indicated to coworkers or the assignments team that I want to retire right at 20 years. I always, always say that I want to do at least 20 years. Meaning, I am happy to do more if I'm still enjoying myself. Probably no more than 25, but I'll cross that bridge when I come to it. If the topic comes up I do sometimes say that I want to be financially ready to retire when I hit 20 years but I always follow that with "so I can choose to stay in because I like my job, not because I have to."

I appreciate everybody's concern!
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Old 08-19-2016, 10:53 PM   #31
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I do, however, usually get an earful from my boss when the subject of retirement comes up. My boss is at 22 years and "ready" to punch out. I'm just coming up on 13 years. He's constantly talking about getting a civilian job and writing his resume. I have no plans to do any of that, and when I mention that I have no intentions of working when I retire, he says the same things, "you'll get bored," "you'll want a job." WRONG!
Feel free to give your boss (and any other skeptics) my e-mail address... NordsNords at Gmail. Or maybe they'll be more comfortable just browsing the first few months of the blog's posts.

14+ years, no boredom. If anything, life has occasionallybeen busier than I want because I have only mself to blame for overscheduling.

And if I want a job, I'll make my own.
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Old 08-20-2016, 06:56 AM   #32
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Sometimes it is easiest to just give up and allow people to keep believing whatever it is that they want to believe. It isn't going to make your retirement any less real.
Had an experience similar to this, just yesterday. A co-worker has been pushing my buttons with his views of politics, gold, constitution, etc. This has been going on for about a year. Until yesterday, I tried to avoid it by changing subject, etc.

He brought up a hot-button topic (really inappropriate in an office), trying to engage me. Rather than deflect or debate, I mentioned how happy I was to work with everyone. He then asked if I was going out for lunch. LOL. We work in an idyllic setting, so I had plenty of time to point out the beautiful surroundings, talk about the reliability of direct deposit, and so on. Eventually he admitted that he was wrong, and at a previous job he was cautioned about his behavior.

You really don't have to convert or convince others. Just be secure in your own plan and try to ignore the noise.
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Old 08-20-2016, 10:47 AM   #33
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I just broke up with a guy who would correct me whenever I mentioned retirement no matter how many conversations we had on the topic. I would say 'when I retire at 52' and he would say 'IF you retire....'


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Old 08-20-2016, 11:09 AM   #34
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I just broke up with a guy who would correct me whenever I mentioned retirement no matter how many conversations we had on the topic. I would say 'when I retire at 52' and he would say 'IF you retire....'
Good call! Putting up with someone like that is more aggravation than you will need WHEN you retire at 52. There are lots of fish in the sea.
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Old 08-20-2016, 11:44 AM   #35
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I just broke up with a guy who would correct me whenever I mentioned retirement no matter how many conversations we had on the topic. I would say 'when I retire at 52' and he would say 'IF you retire....'

He sounds like a real peach.
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Old 08-20-2016, 11:53 AM   #36
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There are lots of folks to whom "early retirement" is not possible, an "impossible dream"

For whatever reason they can't (or won't) save and invest what is required.
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Old 08-21-2016, 07:20 AM   #37
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I work with a bunch of people who all are required to retire early due to regulation. Even in that category there are some who couldn't imagine being done working in their late 40's-mid 50's. Blows my mind. I tell them I just want the means to be able to stop working by 50. If I'm still having fun I'll stay, if not then I won't! Most agree with that thinking.
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Old 08-21-2016, 07:22 AM   #38
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You really don't have to convert or convince others. Just be secure in your own plan and try to ignore the noise.
This is spot on. Couldn't have said it better.
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