I've thought alot about this thread. Yesterday was my 13th anniversary and it was very sweet. Each stage of marriage is kind of different, because people change, circumstances change, little peeps are added. But I was motivated to answer, OP, because I was curious why a seemingly successful banker (with a BRAIN!) would post such a question online.
And so I nosey-ed (sic) into your old posts and stumbled onto your "Dreaming..." thread. That was a few years ago, and alot can change in a person in a few years time, especially around this stage in your life. Hopefully, when you look back on that thread, you wince, maybe even flush in the privacy of your home, and wish that you could delete those posts. Maybe not. But therein lies the answer to your question.
Because there are plenty of frugal girls out there. I consider myself one... though I wear Jimmy Choos. And sleep on Porthault linen. And mostly buy organic and local for my family.
If you want to look at the black and white: it's the bottom line (which I don't mean to sound pedantic b/c I am sure you know this better than I). If I make alot of money, then I can spend more than the average women, and still save alot.
But the key for you, in regards to the situation you describe in the OP, is what kind of person you are. B/c a woman who has worked her way through the educational system, society at large, achieved that job, and and on top of that, has values that can be described as frugal, will be of a particular character beyond just the money stuff. Does that make any sense
?
Before DH and I were engaged, we never talked about money (2.5 mo). I guess we were busy talking about other things. (and for you dirty minded men...no, we weren't doing other things) But in that period of time, you still get a good idea of what someone is like.
In my line of work (medicine), residency programs interview prospective applicants for a full day before choosing. Interview is probably the most important aspect of your application, esp. for the subsurgical specialties because you will be spending 80-100 hours a week with this person, in oftentimes very stressful and demanding situations. And throw in sleep deprivation, healthy food deprivation, and good exercise deprivation, and well, the worst in people truly come out. So programs want to be sure they are getting someone good.
I always thought that salesmen and people like bankers were good people people. And in my younger days, thought medicine was great cause I just do the medicine stuff and don't have to "deal" with people. HAH!
I guess this is my long way of saying that it is not so much "finding" the beautiful woman who is also frugal and makes alot money. Because she is out there, in multiples. I can almost guarantee you have met at least one or more of her. And she has looked at you, listened to you, and studied you.
But are you the "right" man for her?
