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Old 03-01-2019, 07:36 PM   #61
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My dad funneled everything he could toward a goal of retiring at age 58. He and the family gave up a lot of things and then he died at 55. Tomorrow isnít guaranteed.
This is the danger of choosing Option 1. Choosing option 2 allows people to enjoy life...because life is not guaranteed.

Just today, my wife was talking about driving around our beautiful country coast to coast visiting 30 cities after she retires. I responded "Why wait. Let's do that NOW! Just take a month off and let's GO!"
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Old 03-02-2019, 06:27 PM   #62
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Considering the vacations your daughter enjoys, it definitely makes sense to select option 2. I don't think it would be advisable to jump from airplanes or climb the Everest when you're in your 50's. And if she can afford it why not to enjoy it? But I still would advise her to max out her 401k and IRA and then blow the rest on such vacations or whatever. If she doesn't do it, then it's a bit concerning.
Hopefully she will slow down and think of the finances once she has children, but some people just want to continue enjoying their lives like there is no tomorrow. If I knew that I would drop dead in 15-20 years, I wouldn't even go to work on Monday probably and I start consuming the stash instead of w*rking and still saving.
As others have said your DD is an adult and it's up to her. I would be just happy that she is healthy, independent, and spends her own earned money. There are adults who a capable of earning money but are not even motivated to do it because their parents keep supporting them.
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Old 03-02-2019, 09:03 PM   #63
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Considering the vacations your daughter enjoys, it definitely makes sense to select option 2. I don't think it would be advisable to jump from airplanes or climb the Everest when you're in your 50's. And if she can afford it why not to enjoy it? But I still would advise her to max out her 401k and IRA and then blow the rest on such vacations or whatever. If she doesn't do it, then it's a bit concerning.
Hopefully she will slow down and think of the finances once she has children, but some people just want to continue enjoying their lives like there is no tomorrow. If I knew that I would drop dead in 15-20 years, I wouldn't even go to work on Monday probably and I start consuming the stash instead of w*rking and still saving.
As others have said your DD is an adult and it's up to her. I would be just happy that she is healthy, independent, and spends her own earned money. There are adults who a capable of earning money but are not even motivated to do it because their parents keep supporting them.
As her Dad, I never lectured her about saving money and she never asked me to give her money either...even though I retired at age 65 but with a 6 figure annual retirement. She has visited more places in 5 years than I have in 20 years. She is studying to be a Registered Nurse and she married a really nice guy which I agreed that she made the right choice.

Other than vacations, she is very thrifty. She funded all her vacations by saving money so she knows how to save. When she gets a job as an RN in a few years, I will have a discussion with her about opening up a IRA.
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Old 03-04-2019, 09:53 AM   #64
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My advice is to make sure she's playing the reward credit card points game and make sure she is earning miles/points for all her trips.
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Old 03-04-2019, 10:36 AM   #65
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2013 wonderful hubby of 30 years loses his battle with cancer. age 52
2014 baby brother loses his battle with cancer. age 50
2015 best friend and college roommate goes to walk the dog has a massive heart attack and dies. age 50.

I am no longer on the "wait" until I retire train.

last year when the Eagles made it to the superbowl, I encourage my two sons to spend the money and go to the game. I matched whatever they had saved. lol, now no way in heckdom was I going to Minnesota in January but that is an experience that they will have long after I've kick the bucket.
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Old 03-04-2019, 11:25 AM   #66
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I call this ER/Life balance. You need to balance your ER goals with living in the now, not too much sacrifice, not too little...has to be juuuust right...like Baby Bear.
By 25 I had been to Prague, Vienna, Budapest, Germany, Greenland, Canada, Mexico (three times), and almost every state in the continental US. Oh, I also went airborne in a '97 LT1 Camaro Z28, not quite the same as skydiving, but hey I was livin!


It sounds like she understands any outcomes from either choice though. I agree that you 'aint as young as you once were. I doubt I would enjoy skiing down a 14,500 ft mountain back country as much when I am 55 as I do now in my 30s. Maybe, but I hope the knees hold out.
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Old 03-04-2019, 11:26 AM   #67
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now no way in heckdom was I going to Minnesota in January but that is an experience that they will have long after I've kick the bucket.
Good call, I LEAVE MN in January hah.
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FIRE in 2031 @ 50yrs old (+/- 2yrs) w/ a hypothetical $2.5mil portfolio, 3 appreciated homes worth $1.0mil and rental income to fund my gap years until RMD. Assets will go to an inherited IRA where I plan on watching the investments grow until I die or the trust gets executed.
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Old 03-09-2019, 10:56 AM   #68
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My 25 years old daughter wants to retire early but she is fond of going on expensive vacations. (Skydiving in Dubai, Dog sledding in Alaska to see the Northern lights, etc)

I then asked her a question on which path she would take....

(1) Minimize vacations expenses to retire early or
(2) Take great vacations and retire later.

She prefer option 2 because she is in her 20's and she wants to enjoy life. She also claims that at age 40 or 50 she will be "too old" to enjoy these things in early retirement.

Any comments on which option you would take?

A video of her Dubai vacation is at:
Nothing wrong with wanting to enjoy life. However, from my perspective (I'm "frugal"), skydiving in Dubai adds no additional value to me than skydiving 20 miles from home, so I'd do it that way for a fraction of the cost, and I'd dog sled in Manitoba or Minnesota rather than Alaska, etc. More expensive isn't always better...sometimes it's just more expensive.
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Old 03-09-2019, 11:06 AM   #69
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Nothing wrong with wanting to enjoy life. However, from my perspective (I'm "frugal"), skydiving in Dubai adds no additional value to me than skydiving 20 miles from home, so I'd do it that way for a fraction of the cost, and I'd dog sled in Manitoba or Minnesota rather than Alaska, etc. More expensive isn't always better...sometimes it's just more expensive.
Yea, but you are leaving out bragging rights.
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Old 03-09-2019, 11:14 AM   #70
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Nothing wrong with wanting to enjoy life. However, from my perspective (I'm "frugal"), skydiving in Dubai adds no additional value to me than skydiving 20 miles from home, so I'd do it that way for a fraction of the cost, and I'd dog sled in Manitoba or Minnesota rather than Alaska, etc. More expensive isn't always better...sometimes it's just more expensive.
Just returned from visiting Dubai. Didn’t consider skydiving there, but we did get out and about. You can skydive from home, but it won’t be the same. When you skydive over Dubai, everywhere you look, you can see miles and miles and miles of ——— sand. Not much else.

The best sights in Dubai are seen from the ground. When it comes to skydiving, even bragging rights aren’t enough to go all the way to Dubai for that, and there’s lots to see and do there.

It makes sense to look for a place closer to home. Besides which, if the chute doesn’t open, you also want to minimize the cost and hassle of scooping up your remains and getting them back home.
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Old 03-09-2019, 11:27 AM   #71
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Nothing wrong with wanting to enjoy life. However, from my perspective (I'm "frugal"), skydiving in Dubai adds no additional value to me than skydiving 20 miles from home, so I'd do it that way for a fraction of the cost, and I'd dog sled in Manitoba or Minnesota rather than Alaska, etc. More expensive isn't always better...sometimes it's just more expensive.
Her trip to Alaska was to see the Northern Lights which you can't do in Minnesota. Dog sledding, ice fishing on a frozen lake, having a martini in a cocktail cup made of solid ice at a "ice bar", etc were "side visits" to seeing the Northern Lights. These side visits are things you can't do in California where she lives. She and three of her friends flew to Anchorage and then they drove 400 miles to the Arctic Circle in a rented 4WD SUV and this drive was an adventure in itself. I wish I was in my 20's again. Her Dad.
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Old 03-09-2019, 11:36 AM   #72
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Her trip to Alaska was to see the Northern Lights which you can't do in Minnesota. Dog sledding, ice fishing on a frozen lake, having a martini in a cocktail cup made of solid ice at a "ice bar", etc were "side visits" to seeing the Northern Lights. These side visits are things you can't do in California where she lives. She and three of her friends flew to Anchorage and then they drove 400 miles to the Arctic Circle in a rented 4WD SUV and this drive was an adventure in itself. I wish I was in my 20's again. Her Dad.
Good points. I was looking at it from my perspective which is entirely different. For example, snow and ice around here is normal 5 months of the year.

As a side note...I do get to see the Northern Lights from my deck on occassion.
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Old 03-09-2019, 12:28 PM   #73
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Her vacations to Alaska, Thailand, Dubai, etc were ALWAYS with 3 to 5 of her friends. I recently took a family vacation with 3 other families to Yosemite National Park and Yellowstone National Park and the enjoyment increases exponentially.

We also saved money by sharing expenses and cooking BBQ meals together. My daughter was the accountant who gathered all the receipts and made sure all expenses were split equally. When people take vacations together, you will find your cost decreases because expenses are shared and you can drive with less vehicles.

My daughter saved money by driving from Anchorage instead of taking a connecting flight to Fairfax. If you google "Northern Lights Alaska", the light show is spectacular north of Arctic Circle and this is a lot cheaper than going to Iceland, Norway, etc.
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Old 03-09-2019, 12:47 PM   #74
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Her trip to Alaska was to see the Northern Lights which you can't do in Minnesota. Dog sledding, ice fishing on a frozen lake, having a martini in a cocktail cup made of solid ice at a "ice bar", etc were "side visits" to seeing the Northern Lights. These side visits are things you can't do in California where she lives. She and three of her friends flew to Anchorage and then they drove 400 miles to the Arctic Circle in a rented 4WD SUV and this drive was an adventure in itself. I wish I was in my 20's again. Her Dad.
My previous post was a bit tongue in cheek, but I will say while I have very few regrets about the choices I made during my work years, the few I do have are mostly travel opportunities I did not take advantage of and are no longer available.

Some opportunities should not be put off.
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Old 03-11-2019, 01:31 PM   #75
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I think that there is a middle ground. I took lots of great vacations and still retired early. The key, for me, was paying myself first and investing it, then budgeting vacations and other luxuries out of the remainder.
This.

My wife & I are in our mid-30's and hoping to FIRE no later than 50. Maybe as early as 45. Our current travel budget is about 10% of our total spending and we go on 4-6 trips per year. Usually 2-4 of them being international. We spend a good amount of our money on travel. If we spent less, we could retire much sooner.

Same goes for what we expect our retirement spending to look like. We expect to spend 3-4 times our current annual spending on travel. In context of our retirement budget, that would be around 50% of our total spending. Obviously if we cut this down, we could also FIRE earlier.

But, our big passion in life is travel. No point in moving up our FIRE date and not be able to travel. And no point in not traveling now just to move up our FIRE date.

We always pay ourselves first (max both 401k, max both Roth IRA, max HSA, contribute to brokerage, etc.) and figure out the travel budget from there.
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Old 03-11-2019, 01:54 PM   #76
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But, our big passion in life is travel. No point in moving up our FIRE date and not be able to travel. And no point in not traveling now just to move up our FIRE date.

We always pay ourselves first (max both 401k, max both Roth IRA, max HSA, contribute to brokerage, etc.) and figure out the travel budget from there.
My daughter's mindset is travel first in her 20's and make Early Retirement a secondary priority to travel. However, I will attempt to make her consider paying her 401K, Roth, etc first....and then whatever is left over is her travel budget. This forces her to save money on her other budgetary expenses.

Great strategy. Thank you.
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Old 03-11-2019, 02:21 PM   #77
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Travel broadens the mind and tones the abs

I'm not keen on travel, but my wife and kids sure are.

My oldest DD recently returned from a week in Thailand. Spent 3 days of it projectile vomiting after eating some food from a street vendor. Says she had a great time on the trip!

I told her she could have saved thousands and gotten the same experience by staying home with a jar of expired oysters. Nobody ever listens to Dad.
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Old 03-11-2019, 02:40 PM   #78
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I'm not keen on travel, but my wife and kids sure are.
My GF and myself are not really into travel...we're "get away from the cold for a while" people, so we're able to limit travel expenses by finding a last minute seat sale or by driving south and renting for a month or so. And that's good because my budget doesn't really lend itself to extensive world travel to exotic locations.
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Old 05-12-2019, 07:44 AM   #79
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My wife always says “I know we’re doing fine but it always feels like we don’t have any money.” We’ve taken a few “big” vacations since getting married 6 years ago: Costa Rica for our honeymoon, all inclusive in Cancun, Mexico a couple of years ago, and an all inclusive in the Bahamas in April 2017 for my SIL’s wedding. We’ve also done smaller vacations like Savannah or Charleston but nothing recently other than my wife going to Disney World with some friends last year.

The last couple of years have been difficult because we’ve both not been working at the same time. I quit a job I really grew to dislike in February 2018 and it took 6.5 months to find a new job. DW quit a job she hated in February this year and will go back to school for a year starting next month for an accounting degree. No kids and we aren’t interested in starting a family so that is a big advantage financially as well as no debt and a paid off home.

Honestly, the fact that I’ve been saving for retirement since starting work in my upper 20s after pharmacy school gave me the ability to say screw it and quit a job that was killing me with stress and physical and mental strain. My wife escaped a similarly bad situation in the public school system here (don’t get me started on the train wreck that is the school system) and honestly having the freedom to get the heck out of terrible job situations has meant more to me than any vacation.

I know my DW wants to travel. She is so much more of a world traveler than I have been so far. We will have to budget for traveling at least early in any retirement plan we develop. Honestly, we both want to leave our jobs and go full time RVing around the country as soon as possible but we’re assuming our timetable for that plan is at least 5 years out.

I’m 45 and DW is 32 so I have to make sure any retirement plan compensates for her expected long life after I’m gone. Otherwise we’re hoping to get out more on trips before we retire after we are both working again starting next summer.

In your working years it can feel like you either have the time to vacation or the money but not both. I can’t wait to be FI to be in the both category.

The other thing I look forward to in retirement is to be more flexible regarding when we can go on a big trip. In that situation you can potentially take advantage of travel deals that are usually difficult to do because of the timing of a vacation while still employed full time.

Life is a balance and tomorrow is not guaranteed. But I refuse to wish my life away to get to some future magical retirement period even if I FIRE and am “younger” than I thought I would be when I retire. Life is too short not to enjoy the journey and that includes the working years. I’m hoping to quit work in my early 50s but we’ll see how thing play out for us. The next 5 years of growth to our nest egg is critical to how and when we’re able to retire.

I just took a week off work and we went camping locally for a couple of nights with our two dogs. We really enjoyed it and did a lot of hiking. Not expensive as vacations go but it was “getting away from it all” which is important sometimes.

It’s all about priorities. Some people value toys more than trips. As long as you plan and budget accordingly you can make anything work including jumping out of a perfectly good plane.
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Old 05-12-2019, 09:44 AM   #80
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My daughter's primary language is mandarin and she is going to nursing college which she has to translate some difficult medical terminology words into mandarin so she can understand the subject material. She is stressed out. However, I told her that "greatness can only be achieved through hardships".

During her spring break and summer vacations from college, she takes overseas vacations to relax and recover from her final exams. After she finish this difficult stage of her young life, I have a duty as her father to plan for her retirement.

Everyone goes through hardships . Hardships build character and wisdom. She has a budget and she does not have any toys. I do provide some help but overall she is very responsible about spending and since her overseas vacations help her stress levels, then I fully support this.
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