Not Going Back to Work...

[Calgary_Girl]

Told my boss that I'm not going back to work after my Maternity Leave is over...gonna be a SAM for a while . I kind of feel guilty but taking care of two munchkins is like a full time job!

[Nords]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Calgary_Girl Told my boss that I'm not going back to work after my Maternity Leave is over...gonna be a SAM for a while . I kind of feel guilty but taking care of two munchkins is like a full time job!

"Congratulations"? Sounds like you're going to work at least as hard for a lot less pay...

I think the first dozen years are the worst most important. If you do it right and get a little lucky, then by the time they're teenagers they'll have so much respect and admiration for you that they'll stop talking to you!

[Calgary_Girl]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nords I think the first dozen years are the worst most important. If you do it right and get a little lucky, then by the time they're teenagers they'll have so much respect and admiration for you that they'll stop talking to you!

Fully expect that to happen....otherwise they wouldn't be teenagers right? From what I remember doesn't that start before they're teenagers anyway? Say like 9 or 10?

[Sue J]

Congratulations, I hope you enjoy the time. When our first was born I left my job and we lived on one income. The idea was that if we liked it that way and could live on just DH's income we'd just keep going. It turned out so well that I didn't work again until the youngest started college!

Some women say they feel isolated and bored and need adult contact but I didn't feel that way. I liked the isolation and I loved being a mom and homemaker. I'm not one to get bored, I always have something to do or I just enjoy doing nothing.

Have a wonderful time!

[kumquat]

Congrats.

As a Canadian RE, I'm glad someone else is paying for your EI benefits (assuming you're getting them) .

Enjoy.

[Calgary_Girl]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Sue J Congratulations, I hope you enjoy the time. When our first was born I left my job and we lived on one income. The idea was that if we liked it that way and could live on just DH's income we'd just keep going. It turned out so well that I didn't work again until the youngest started college! Some women say they feel isolated and bored and need adult contact but I didn't feel that way. I liked the isolation and I loved being a mom and homemaker. I'm not one to get bored, I always have something to do or I just enjoy doing nothing. Have a wonderful time!

Thanks Sue! I worked PT after my first Mat Leave with our first daughter and while I was pregnant with #2. We easily banked my salary and lived off of DH's so I knew it wouldn't be a problem if I wanted to stay home with the girls and not go back to work.

Ideally, I would have loved to go back to work PT but the morning rush to get the kids out of bed, dressed and out the door was not worth the stress. I proposed working from home 1 or 2 days a week to my boss and she said the company's new policy was that they preferred that none of the employees work from home . So I said "see ya"! Plus, I really hate the direction the company's new management is taking it and I really don't want to work for a company like that anyway .

[Bestwifeever]

Enjoy those little ones and make some good memories with them, CG.

I was able to work at least PT from home as an "independent contractor" (i.e., "pay all your own taxes and get no bennies, you schmuck") for all but two years according to my SS statement (1982 after child2 was born, and 1992 when I went back to school). The PT years were crazy and looking back I wonder why I did it--the money pretty much went to taxes and it was exhausting and you really get no respect from anyone. So iimho your company did you a favor with its reaction to your idea to work from home a couple of days a week .

[DangerMouse]

Congrats on the decision to stay home. I am sure you will not regret it, the time you spend with your girls now will allow you to have a better quality of life I am sure. This time is so precious so enjoy it.

[Meadbh]

Congratulations CG! I applaud your decision. This is anything but RE, it will be major work, but very important work. The great thing is that you and DH have proven that you have the FI to live on one salary. It's great that you have the choice.

[WhoDaresWins]

Don't feel guilty, CG! I don't think I ever worked so hard as when I was a SAHM with a husband that was always at work (no, he could not have worked less if I was earning money, too), and a household to run. We never lived near family that could help, and I felt that I was making more of a contribution to my little family's well being by caring for our child than I would have in the the workforce. It is very much a personal choice, and my husband was supportive. Money was a little tight at times, but we always had everything we needed.
When my son got a little older, I was constantly busy taking him to play groups, the park, Gymboree, library programs, swim lessons, tennis lessons, volunteering at his school, traveling to keep him in touch with the relatives, etc.
I did return to paid employment when my son was 12. I was somewhat disadvantaged in the job market due to rusty skills but eventually things clicked for me, and I have been plodding away in cubicle-land ever since.

[Nords]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Bestwifeever Enjoy those little ones and make some good memories with them, CG. I was able to work at least PT from home as an "independent contractor" (i.e., "pay all your own taxes and get no bennies, you schmuck") for all but two years according to my SS statement (1982 after child2 was born, and 1992 when I went back to school). The PT years were crazy and looking back I wonder why I did it--the money pretty much went to taxes and it was exhausting and you really get no respect from anyone. So iimho your company did you a favor with its reaction to your idea to work from home a couple of days a week .

Business Week's conventional wisdom was that you were keeping your workplace skills (and your résumé) fresh in case your spouse got laid off or, heaven forbid, you ended up divorced/widowed.

But I like your answer better!

[Ed_The_Gypsy]

Two thumbs up, CG!

(By the way, FYI to all you menehunes basking in the sun, last week Calgary had the second lowest measured temperature on earth--second only to the south pole. CG, keep them little guys inside!)

Ed,
who still has one foot in Alberta.

[Emeritus]

Interesting.
We always felt that parenthood should be really shared.
I had just gotten Tenure when our oldest was born. I had always been the cook so I took over the full child care management. DW was in an intense stage of professional development. I went on all the School field trips (me and the moms) and did the carting to various day care people and special classes and sports. I stayed home when kids were sick. It Pissed off my Single Female boss that I stayed home with sick kids. I never missed a class and never slacked off on research, but it was a real grind. From that day on DW always made more money, but we did absolutely nothing together without the children. Took them to Europe , Egypt, Kenya, Australia and all over the USA. DW was both a wonderful mom and a role model of professional success. Just had the kids and SILs her for Thanksgiving where they cooked up a storm.
Every body find s their own path. Good luck and best wishes

[Alan]

Congratulations CG. We made the same decision that one of us should stay at home once the first one was born. We were both earning exactly the same but DW hated her job at the time so she stayed at home and put her career on hold until that child and the next one 18 months later were at school.

Enjoy being a stay-at-home Mum

[obgyn65]

Congrats CG and best wishes.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Calgary_Girl Told my boss that I'm not going back to work after my Maternity Leave is over...gonna be a SAM for a while . I kind of feel guilty but taking care of two munchkins is like a full time job!

[Lusitan]

Congrats on the new addition(s), Calgary Girl ... I can't always keep up with the news around the boards.

We made the same choice a few years ago, and my spouse has been home with the little one (now little ones, plural) for a few years now, and it has been great. A little tighter on the belt, but much less stress and I think everyone is happy with the arrangement, especially the kids.

Enjoy these years while they're still cuddle-sized!

[Moemg]

Congrats CG on a good decision !

[SunsetSail]

Congrats. DW did that last year after our second. She kept getting questioned about when she was going to return to work or similar comments. She started telling people she retired and then no one asked those questions anymore. She loves it - it's more work but very likely much more meaningful and important than any previous 'job'.

[Calgary_Girl]

Thanks everyone for the well wishes!

I'm looking forward to Dec. 13th since that is the day that I was officially supposed to report back to work . It'll be nice not having to drag myself (or the kids) out of bed while it's still dark outside, snowing and 30 below .

[myself]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Nords "Congratulations"? Sounds like you're going to work at least as hard for a lot less pay... I think the first dozen years are the worst most important. If you do it right and get a little lucky, then by the time they're teenagers they'll have so much respect and admiration for you that they'll stop talking to you!

Quote:

Originally Posted by Calgary_Girl Told my boss that I'm not going back to work after my Maternity Leave is over...gonna be a SAM for a while . I kind of feel guilty but taking care of two munchkins is like a full time job!

I must say that as a father of 4, and my wife staying home really helps out with shuttling the kids around, or having 'em ready by feeding them and getting them changed for any sports or bands that they may be partaking in. And so far our eldest 2 (daughters no less), who are 10 - soon to be 11 - are still daddy's girls.

Congratulations Calgary_Girl!